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Apr 25, 2006

Strong stroll for a mangy stray

Smirking_Serpent posted:

So one day we were having dinner, and somehow our relationship status popped up. I told him from the beginning this was just a friends with benefits situation. He said he always had the same dynamic with women but let the women name it. I didn’t want him to get the wrong idea, so I told him I didn’t feel anything emotional with him, but that i loved having sex with him.

At this points he sarcastically asks “So what, am I just your vibrator?”. I think of a response and chuckle, but didn’t say it because I kinda knew it would hurt him. So he’s like no tell me what did you think. So I said “Well not really, my vibrator makes me cum” which he got REALLY upset over. I kept telling him i liked the sex and i was sorry for making the joke, but to be honest it was the truth.

He sulked and made sarcastic comments for the rest of the day, but we did have great sex that night. And no, I did not cum that night neither.

:laffo: you go girl

Smirking_Serpent posted:

AITA for posting creepy & gross texts from ex-coworkers on Twitter?

Someone pls find these tweets

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

AreWeDrunkYet
Jul 8, 2006

Pinecone Sample posted:

Sorry here's a happier one

AITA for firing two high schoolers at my workplace?

This is hilarious, trying to fire people without any authority to do so.

How does someone even manage to delude themselves about something like this?

Smirking_Serpent posted:

AITA for posting creepy & gross texts from ex-coworkers on Twitter?

This is going to cause her more grief than is worth it and most likely none of the offenders will be meaningfully punished, but good for her for doing the right thing.

AreWeDrunkYet fucked around with this message at 01:46 on Jul 27, 2019

Barudak
May 7, 2007

Pinecone Sample posted:

I(30F) found out that my husband(35M) of 10 years has been cheating for over 2 years with my little sister (21F) who is now pregnant at the same time as me.


Hit me with the :biotruths: on this

Were past biotruths and onto data and analytics. This is 7th banging both sisters post

Bruceski
Aug 21, 2007

The tools of a hero mean nothing without a solid core.

AreWeDrunkYet posted:

This is hilarious, trying to fire people without any authority to do so.

How does someone even manage to delude themselves about something like this?

I think they potentially had the authority to fire people but "students don't deserve those hours because real people need the money" is a bad reason.

The Lone Badger
Sep 24, 2007

He decided to 'take initiative' IE try to fire some people before anyone fired him.

Dixie Cretin Seaman
Jan 22, 2008

all hat and one catte
Hot Rope Guy

Pinecone Sample posted:

AITA for letting my 7 year old son watch Cops to get over his fear of black people/cities?

:stare:

ad090 posted:

my daughter is only 6 months old ... But this Bronco means everything to me

lol

Smirking_Serpent posted:

My coworker admitted to making false reports against my ex-boyfriend to get him disqualified from becoming a police officer?

...he filed a report saying my boyfriend threatened him and was very temperamental and aggressive and that he was scared of him.

Maybe it was a misunderstanding. He was trying to write the bf a letter of recommendation.

nankeen
Mar 20, 2019

by Cyrano4747

Barudak posted:

Were past biotruths and onto data and analytics. This is 7th banging both sisters post
well, go on, tell us your findings

AreWeDrunkYet
Jul 8, 2006

Bruceski posted:

I think they potentially had the authority to fire people but "students don't deserve those hours because real people need the money" is a bad reason.

I get that a Subway franchise might not exactly be a tightly run operation, but if there is any doubt about whether you have the authority to fire someone you absolutely do not.

mllaneza
Apr 28, 2007

Veteran, Bermuda Triangle Expeditionary Force, 1993-1952




Smirking_Serpent posted:

AITA for posting creepy & gross texts from ex-coworkers on Twitter?

AITA For what i tweeted?

This woman is a national hero.

Smirking_Serpent
Aug 27, 2009

AreWeDrunkYet posted:

I get that a Subway franchise might not exactly be a tightly run operation, but if there is any doubt about whether you have the authority to fire someone you absolutely do not.

imagine watching the office and thinking dwight was the good guy

Smirking_Serpent
Aug 27, 2009

AITA for telling my friend “domestic discipline” is just a way for husband to excuse abusing her?

I’m catholic and have been my whole life. I’ve seen some people use our religion to excuse some crazy things but I’ve never seen anything crazier then this.

I met this woman a few months ago in college, we first bonded over being catholic lol. But we really got along and started hanging out a couple times a week.

The other day, we were out my house cooking and she told me the weirdest thing I’ve ever heard of my life. She told me that her and her husband practice “domestic discipline” which is ”biblical”. And basically it means that she has rules and is punished for breaking them. Her husband is her “authority” and she answers to him.

She told me the mainly the punishment is just “spanking” and that he uses his belt.

I immediately told this is not biblical and not to throw dirt on the Bible like that.

I told her it sounds like her husband either has a BDSM fetish he is ashamed of or he is a wife beater who disguises it as “discipline”. I told her he is making her think this is a healthy and good way to live so that he can manipulate her into accepting being beat.

Well, she got really offended. She tried to defend it and even told me that when if I was submissive to my husband then I’d have a better marriage. I told her this was bullshit because I have a perfectly good marriage and my husband isn’t a pussy who has to assert his dominance through acting like he’s my father. I told her I would hate having sex with someone like that.

She stormed out of my house and later she texted me and told me she didn’t want to see me again because I was out of line for speaking to her like this. She said I should keep my negative opinions to myself.

I know they say if you have nothing nice to say don’t say anything at all, but I really thought I needed to tell her what it is really is.

But, AITA??

Smirking_Serpent
Aug 27, 2009

AITA for honking at another driver who cut in front of me at a drive thru each time she tries to order?

This line at a Starbucks I went to was really long. I was in line for a good maybe 20 minutes. Until this lady in a Mercedes tries to cut in front of me and like 8 others behind me. I laid on the horn and tried to block her from cutting me but she succeeded anyway and flipped me off.

Okay. I’m the type of person who will not let someone get away with poo poo like this. So I waited until she pulls up and as soon as she tries to order, I honk. She then looks at me with a dirty look and gives me the finger which I already had a middle finger of my own ready for her. Each time she makes an attempt to order something I honk and sometimes lay on the horn for 3 seconds. We stopped as soon as she drove off. We then ordered and went about our day.

I just can’t people who are extremely rude like that lady and I couldn’t simply let this go.

AITA for this?

FAUXTON
Jun 2, 2005

spero che tu stia bene

Smirking_Serpent posted:

AITA for honking at another driver who cut in front of me at a drive thru each time she tries to order?

This line at a Starbucks I went to was really long. I was in line for a good maybe 20 minutes. Until this lady in a Mercedes tries to cut in front of me and like 8 others behind me. I laid on the horn and tried to block her from cutting me but she succeeded anyway and flipped me off.

Okay. I’m the type of person who will not let someone get away with poo poo like this. So I waited until she pulls up and as soon as she tries to order, I honk. She then looks at me with a dirty look and gives me the finger which I already had a middle finger of my own ready for her. Each time she makes an attempt to order something I honk and sometimes lay on the horn for 3 seconds. We stopped as soon as she drove off. We then ordered and went about our day.

I just can’t people who are extremely rude like that lady and I couldn’t simply let this go.

AITA for this?

No that owns

therobit
Aug 19, 2008

I've been tryin' to speak with you for a long time

Smirking_Serpent posted:

AITA for honking at another driver who cut in front of me at a drive thru each time she tries to order?

This line at a Starbucks I went to was really long. I was in line for a good maybe 20 minutes. Until this lady in a Mercedes tries to cut in front of me and like 8 others behind me. I laid on the horn and tried to block her from cutting me but she succeeded anyway and flipped me off.

Okay. I’m the type of person who will not let someone get away with poo poo like this. So I waited until she pulls up and as soon as she tries to order, I honk. She then looks at me with a dirty look and gives me the finger which I already had a middle finger of my own ready for her. Each time she makes an attempt to order something I honk and sometimes lay on the horn for 3 seconds. We stopped as soon as she drove off. We then ordered and went about our day.

I just can’t people who are extremely rude like that lady and I couldn’t simply let this go.

AITA for this?

It's childish as hell but that doesn't mean it's wrong.

HIJK
Nov 25, 2012
in the room where you sleep

Smirking_Serpent posted:

AITA for honking at another driver who cut in front of me at a drive thru each time she tries to order?

This line at a Starbucks I went to was really long. I was in line for a good maybe 20 minutes. Until this lady in a Mercedes tries to cut in front of me and like 8 others behind me. I laid on the horn and tried to block her from cutting me but she succeeded anyway and flipped me off.

Okay. I’m the type of person who will not let someone get away with poo poo like this. So I waited until she pulls up and as soon as she tries to order, I honk. She then looks at me with a dirty look and gives me the finger which I already had a middle finger of my own ready for her. Each time she makes an attempt to order something I honk and sometimes lay on the horn for 3 seconds. We stopped as soon as she drove off. We then ordered and went about our day.

I just can’t people who are extremely rude like that lady and I couldn’t simply let this go.

AITA for this?

oh yeah you'll definitely fix the other driver by honking at them. great idea.

Xaris
Jul 25, 2006

Lucky there's a family guy
Lucky there's a man who positively can do
All the things that make us
Laugh and cry
yeah NTA. especially mercedes lol

one thing that owns about driving my 2001 accord beater-trash which has a mismatched-color bumper and dings and scratches is that i give no fucks and if someone tries to cut me off their car will just get wrecked assuming they'd be deemed at fault (which side-colliding would). its amazing how much different people treat you when you have a poo poo car, like they're more cautious, wave me on all the time even when they have the right of way, and if someone tries to cut me off at the last minute they look and just back off and get the guy behind me instead.

FAUXTON
Jun 2, 2005

spero che tu stia bene

Xaris posted:

yeah NTA. especially mercedes lol

one thing that owns about driving my 2001 accord beater-trash which has a mismatched-color bumper and dings and scratches is that i give no fucks and if someone tries to cut me off their car will just get wrecked assuming they'd be deemed at fault (which side-colliding would). its amazing how much different people treat you when you have a poo poo car, like they're more cautious, wave me on all the time even when they have the right of way, and if someone tries to cut me off at the last minute they look and just back off and get the guy behind me instead.

Yeah because they assume you're an inattentive fuckup who's one text message away from flying off the side of a bridge lol

DragQueenofAngmar
Dec 29, 2009

You shall not pass!

FAUXTON posted:

Yeah because they assume you're an inattentive fuckup who's one text message away from flying off the side of a bridge lol

yeah, rich people are dumb and classist as gently caress it owns in this one scenario whereas usually they stomp all over anyone with less money than them

it also extremely owns to ruin the entitled mercedes drivers ordering experience, and tbh it would own even if she hadn’t cut the other guy off

Xaris
Jul 25, 2006

Lucky there's a family guy
Lucky there's a man who positively can do
All the things that make us
Laugh and cry

DragQueenofAngmar posted:

yeah, rich people are dumb and classist as gently caress it owns in this one scenario whereas usually they stomp all over anyone with less money than them

it also extremely owns to ruin the entitled mercedes drivers ordering experience, and tbh it would own even if she hadn’t cut the other guy off
yeah, inflicting class consciousness is good praxis. it's otherwise a piece of poo poo to drive and gets relatively bad mileage but i love that no one tries to gently caress with you even though i've never been in an accident, but hey i'll take the protective bubble of people realizing that you have nothing to lose and they will get hosed up if they try.

e: i drive my company's '11 prius a lot for work/errands and it's night and day how people treat you. when driving the prius, they will aggressively cut you off and do stupid poo poo zig-zagging around, ignoring that they don't have right-away, or pull the "oh poo poo im a moron whose too busy texting my instagrams but oh wait is that my exit??? *swerves across 4 lanes of heavy-traffic at the last second expecting the seas to part like mose because they have a porsche SUV with the baby-on-board bumper-sticker*".

Xaris fucked around with this message at 04:56 on Jul 27, 2019

Barudak
May 7, 2007

nankeen posted:

well, go on, tell us your findings

I need more data samples to extrapolate to the general population, please ask women you know with sisters this question to help with the research.

therobit
Aug 19, 2008

I've been tryin' to speak with you for a long time
If I see someone in a car with body damage I am wary of them not because of their socioeconomic status, but because I think they probably caused an accident. If they weren't the at-fault party, it would have been repaired on the other person's dime.

DragQueenofAngmar
Dec 29, 2009

You shall not pass!

therobit posted:

If I see someone in a car with body damage I am wary of them not because of their socioeconomic status, but because I think they probably caused an accident. If they weren't the at-fault party, it would have been repaired on the other person's dime.

lmao this is just precious

Xaris
Jul 25, 2006

Lucky there's a family guy
Lucky there's a man who positively can do
All the things that make us
Laugh and cry

DragQueenofAngmar posted:

lmao this is just precious

Smirking_Serpent
Aug 27, 2009

AITA for cutting off a lifelong friend for having Münchausen syndrome?

I’ve known this person for over 30 years. About 12 years ago, he called and said he had a rare form of cancer and that he had maybe two years to live.

Devastated, I offered to help in any way I could. There are a few steps in the middle, but it ended up with me paying a couple of bills for him.

He was always a stand up guy, so I thought nothing of it. When he told me he went into remission, I was of course happy for him and with a few friends, we threw him a f*** cancer party.

A year later, he had tumors on his brain that went away.

Then, it was Fibromyalgia, which got better.

Then he had another degenerative bone disease.

Then he claimed to have epilepsy.

You get the point. He claims to have a disease. Gets an outpouring of attention. Then he gets better, or stops talking about it.

Around 6 months ago, he called me in tears saying that he has been diagnosed with bowel cancer.

I told him I didn’t believe him. Told him I would if he sent me a copy of the diagnosis. It got ugly. He proceeded to attack me in our loose group of friends and online. Mutual friends are on his side. One even said: “but what if it’s real this time?”

In any case, I’ve blocked all of them and ignore calls. I personally think he is an emotional vampire/terrorist and that it is very unhealthy for me (and him) to continue supporting these delusions.

So, AITA?

AKA Pseudonym
May 16, 2004

A dashing and sophisticated young man
Doctor Rope

Mokelumne Trekka posted:

I have no idea what Bora Bora is.

I am not rich, which might be partly the reason.

It used to be a standard fancy vacation sitcom characters would be going on, coming back from, trying to win a trip to in some wacky contest, or some poo poo like that. It's kind of hard for me to see it as a real place honestly.

Bronze Fonz
Feb 14, 2019




HIJK posted:

oh yeah you'll definitely fix the other driver by honking at them. great idea.

You can't "fix" most people.
The point here is that if she wants to throw her feces at strangers like a monkey, it should be expected to receive some in return. NTA.

Pinecone Sample
Oct 12, 2010

THIS ACCOUNT HAS BEEN SEIZED
by the United States Federal Bureau of Investigation in accordance with a seizure warrant issued pursuant to 69 U.S.C Sec. 420
my (25m) brother won't stop wearing my (18f) clothes, amongst other extreme things. begging for help.

quote:

so, some backstory. during my childhood, i remember i my parents would go to the casino, or on dates, and that left my brother and i home alone together. i would go downstairs to play video games, and my brother would be upstairs in his room that's next to mine. i would come upstairs to go into my room, and i would find him, rummaging through my closet or in my drawers. i would ask him why, and he would say something like "uh, looking for my shirt that got lost in the wash". this was a satisfactory response for me and i would be on my merry way, not suspecting a thing. the first time i remember this, it started around when i was 7 and he was 14. over the years, this happened multiple times. i never suspected anything until i was about 15. he would do this more often. i would catch him taking a pair of my pants and he would give me an excuse and i would just believe him and move on, growing more suspicious every time. i found a sweater of mine that smelled like him, and grew upset. this is when i figured out he was wearing my clothes. i wouldn't care enough to check for a long time.

fast forward to 2017. our father passes away. a few weeks later, my mom and i leave the house to get food for everyone, and i come back to find my fishnets on the floor of my room, my drawer ajar. this pissed me off because i had finally pieced it together that he was probably doing something unfavorable in my clothing. i was 16 at the time. this made me beyond upset and i screamed at him. i asked him why he kept doing it, he responded with "i don't know why i do it" and leaving it at that. always "i don't know". i asked him if he was trans or had dysphoria, he said no. i asked him if he was crossdressing or a sissy, he said no. i told him i would gather my money and buy him his own poo poo if that meant it would stop him from using my clothing, and he declined it and said he would stop. he lied to me throughout this conversation. told me it was once he'd done it, but i remembered multiple times throughout the years. he kept lying. i gave up and left the conversation, angry and hurt. i figured that he was just a sissy but too embarrassed to admit it. i also figured i shamed and scared him into stopping.

he didn't. i found little bits and pieces of evidence here and there, but nothing i could fully condemn him about.

fast forward one year. i'm going to my graduation rehearsal. i left the house and had to come back to pick something up, leaving my brother with the house to himself. i have a sweatshirt i really love. i love a music group called SHINee, and have for about 8 years now. i saved up my money to buy their merchandise (we weren't doing financially well at the time, dealing with my father's funeral expenses, etc). i own a black sweatshirt, with nothing but "SHINee World IV" in white on the front, and a member's name and birth year on the back. not a feminine garment of clothing at all. my family knows how special it is to me, and i rarely wear it. as my mom and i pulled into the driveway, i saw him wearing my sweatshirt, standing in view from outside. he scrambled to take it off, and i ran in the house. he had enough time to take off the sweatshirt by the time i was inside, and i didn't have enough time to be pissed at him to i screamed at him and asked him to stop. he smugly scoffed at me, flipped me off, and i left promptly. i came home and he gave me the same "i don't know" that i expect from him every time. that truly pissed me off the most. i also have a pair of SHINee socks my boyfriend bought me as a surprise. the member on those socks is deceased, so i hold those high. i found them in his room as well. i had put them in our clothes hamper because they were dirty, since i wore them well. i don't know why he took them from the hamper.

i used to be a domme and i've talked to dozens of sissies, and his behavior doesn't match up with that of a typical sissy, in my opinion. i have trans friends and have done lots of research on gender identity disorder and he doesn't seem to match. he has no dysphoria and likes to appear masculine, etc. i have no problem with trans people, or crossdressers, or sissies, or people who want to express effeminately, but he's none of these and i don't know what's up with him. he doesn't tell me anything no matter how much i pry and threaten him.

so far, since 2017, i've found so many garments tampered with, or found in his room. this includes my sweatshirt multiple times, my mom's bra, my fishnets, my leggings, my skirts (i found a mysterious stain on them also :/), my chokers, my belts, and my sweaters. he also will offer to buy me clothing whenever i want, and pushes me to pick out shoes that i want although my feet are much smaller than his.

to make matters worse, while i was sleuthing to find answers as to why he steals my clothing, i found out that he's a necrophiliac. on his computer are so many simulated snuff videos of women being hanged, strangled, and killed in other ways. he logs onto websites every day to watch this content, and almost exclusively this content. this terrifies me. i'm no stranger to fetishes but this in conjunction with him having anger issues and being generally like he is makes me beyond uncomfortable. on his phone are literally THOUSANDS of pictures of women just standing, sometimes posing for pictures, fully clothed. sometimes pictures of college girls smiling for nice pictures, sometimes fashion bloggers' pictures of them showing off an outfit. there is not a single naked woman on his phone. i also found him searching for camera footage / stream in my school, before i graduated. i feel that telling our mom that he's a necrophiliac would be a violation of his privacy, and she wouldn't know how to handle that information.

also, i have to mention that ever since i was maybe about 10, he'll pace back and forth in the hallway and watch me in my doorway while i sleep. a rule in our house has always been that we have to keep our doors open ("don't do anything you wouldn't be comfortable with me seeing" - our narcissist dad). i'm used to the lack of privacy and it doesn't bother me too much aside from my brother's creepiness. sometimes i'll wake up and remain completely still in bed, barely open on eye, and i'll see my brother walking back and forth between my doorway, occasionally stopping and standing still and watching me. just watching me. doing nothing else, just looking at me intently. i don't know what it is he wants. sometimes i'll ask him what he's doing and he says he's just pacing because he's nervous, or some other lovely excuse. i'm an extremely light sleeper now because of this. i sometimes wait until he's gone for work at 5 in the morning to go to sleep because it's so terrifying. i don't know what it is he wants from me. i've told my boyfriend all of this and he suggests he might have incestuous feelings towards me, but that's the worst case scenario in my opinion and i don't know if it could be true.

it's so hard to explain this to anyone because this is such a unique and complex situation and it's so hard to explain all of this without breaking down. i've never seen anyone go through this so i can't really seek support for it. it's taken me so much time and courage to write this post. i've lost so much sleep over this, and because of being such a light sleeper i experience sleep paralysis regularly and my sleep schedule is almost nocturnal. my mom doesn't seem to care that much about the fact that i'm the sole victim of it, and she tries to ignore it as much as she can. this has caused me so much distress. i cry almost every other day about this. i can't look him in the eye sometimes because i'm so upset constantly with him. i can't trust him. i feel like i have no privacy. i can't leave the house without turning on motion detection on my computer and obsessively taking pictures of how everything is in my room. i'm 5'2'' and a very busty (34K bra size in US sizing), curvy person and he's 5'5'' and 140 lbs which means he can easily fit into my clothing, so this is also a main motivating factor behind my eating disorder. i just want this to stop but i don't have the means to move out, and neither does he at this time. no matter how much i yell and scream and cry and plead for him to stop, he won't.

i'm just asking for someone, ANYONE to give their thoughts on this. anything at all. i'm at a brick wall and i'm so scared day in and day out. please help me.



edit:

tl;dr: brother won't stop wearing my clothing for reasons i don't know, watches me when i sleep, has fetishes that are terrifying given this context, and i don't know what to do. i'm physically and mentally suffering over this. i can't move out and am begging for someone to read this and give me their opinion.

DragQueenofAngmar
Dec 29, 2009

You shall not pass!

Pinecone Sample posted:

my (25m) brother won't stop wearing my (18f) clothes, amongst other extreme things. begging for help.

okay this guy is either already a serial killer or he will be oh my loving god

AnoHito
May 8, 2014

Pinecone Sample posted:

my (25m) brother won't stop wearing my (18f) clothes, amongst other extreme things. begging for help.

She should really try to move out before her brother is caught wearing her skin.

Smirking_Serpent
Aug 27, 2009

WIBTA for getting rid of wasps against wifes wishes?

So we have these super agressive wasps which are basically yellow jackets on meth. They will NOT leave you alone if you dont dIsturb them and there are several nests near the house. We run to dodge them when we go to the car. The wasps sting are supposedly 10x worse pain than a yellowjacket or bee. Miraculously nobodys gotten stings yet but our 14 year old son is scared to death of them. I am pretty scared of them too, they are loving dangerous. My wife whines whenever we talk about spraying them. She says that you shouldnt kill pollinators and they just want food and water and dont want to sting. My son almost got stung the other day. WIBTA for taking it upon myself to slay these fuckers and defy my wife? We ate being terrorized by them but i think my wife will be livid... She just doesnt give a drat about our safety. Am i the rear end in a top hat?

QuarkJets
Sep 8, 2008

Smirking_Serpent posted:

AITA for posting creepy & gross texts from ex-coworkers on Twitter?

gently caress no, definitely NTA

therobit
Aug 19, 2008

I've been tryin' to speak with you for a long time

Smirking_Serpent posted:

WIBTA for getting rid of wasps against wifes wishes?

So we have these super agressive wasps which are basically yellow jackets on meth. They will NOT leave you alone if you dont dIsturb them and there are several nests near the house. We run to dodge them when we go to the car. The wasps sting are supposedly 10x worse pain than a yellowjacket or bee. Miraculously nobodys gotten stings yet but our 14 year old son is scared to death of them. I am pretty scared of them too, they are loving dangerous. My wife whines whenever we talk about spraying them. She says that you shouldnt kill pollinators and they just want food and water and dont want to sting. My son almost got stung the other day. WIBTA for taking it upon myself to slay these fuckers and defy my wife? We ate being terrorized by them but i think my wife will be livid... She just doesnt give a drat about our safety. Am i the rear end in a top hat?

Spray away and remind her that wasps are not pollinators.

Xaris
Jul 25, 2006

Lucky there's a family guy
Lucky there's a man who positively can do
All the things that make us
Laugh and cry

therobit posted:

Spray away and remind her that wasps are not pollinators.
fig wasps are but those are the only exclusion and not the doom n death terminator wasps that are much more common. but yeah it sucks because the real pollinators are massively going extinct and everything fucks with them, including wasps and those fly-infecting-bees that makes their heads explode with baby flies, massive pesticides, and changing deathclimate.

although wasps generally won't gently caress with people unless they're threatened. yellowjackets will though.

anyways spray away

Xaris fucked around with this message at 06:37 on Jul 27, 2019

dudeness
Mar 5, 2010

:minnie: Cat Army :minnie:
Fallen Rib
Tell her you'll take over the responsibility of pollinating, ie cumming on the plants, and she'll let you get rid of the wasps.

FAUXTON
Jun 2, 2005

spero che tu stia bene

Smirking_Serpent posted:

WIBTA for getting rid of wasps against wifes wishes?

So we have these super agressive wasps which are basically yellow jackets on meth. They will NOT leave you alone if you dont dIsturb them and there are several nests near the house. We run to dodge them when we go to the car. The wasps sting are supposedly 10x worse pain than a yellowjacket or bee. Miraculously nobodys gotten stings yet but our 14 year old son is scared to death of them. I am pretty scared of them too, they are loving dangerous. My wife whines whenever we talk about spraying them. She says that you shouldnt kill pollinators and they just want food and water and dont want to sting. My son almost got stung the other day. WIBTA for taking it upon myself to slay these fuckers and defy my wife? We ate being terrorized by them but i think my wife will be livid... She just doesnt give a drat about our safety. Am i the rear end in a top hat?

usually they leave when people of color start moving into the neighborhood

Evil Willow
Apr 26, 2007
Bored now...
My neighbor (40s m) keeps being a busy body whenever my housemate (26f) and I (23f) go outside.

quote:

I'm a young professional living just outside a small city in the US. I rented out the whole bottom level of a house that has been split into two separate apartments. Me and my upstairs neighbor Claire (who rents the top floor of the house) each have our own space, except for the lawn and porches which are shared.

I quickly became friends with Claire after moving in, she was super sweet and welcoming when I moved to a city where I hardly knew anyone. We spend a lot of time together and she's introduced me to a bunch of her friends too.

We like hanging out outside since the summer is beautiful here. We grill dinner outside on the weekends, have bonfires in the fire pit sometimes and hang out and drink around the fire, we both sunbathe and read in the yard often. We have friends over sometimes too.

It's the perfect living situation, having my own space but also having a great friend close by.

Except... Our neighbor to the right, Dylan. He's an insane busybody and it's driving Claire and I up the wall.

Over the last few months, he's...

Told us off for sunbathing in bikinis in the front yard, saying we should be ashamed of ourselves since there are a lot of families with kids nearby.

When we've had friends over and they've parked in the street, which has public parking, we caught him putting homemade flyers under their windshield saying that this was a residential neighborhood, and that they'd be towed if they parked in front of people's homes again. (Any legit towing company wouldn't tow them, everyone parked legally, and I figure that's why he just left flyers with empty threats.) A couple of our friends were annoyed at having their cars touched.

We do anything outside and he will stare which is honestly kind of creepy, being eyed by an older dude day-in and day-out

We have fires (legally) and he comes over and complains about the smoke

Someone drove a loud motorcycle through the cul de sac a few times and he assumed it was one of our friends even though it wasn't.

He complained about the grass in the yard being too long, which is against some rule. And I said that by my lease, it's the landlord's responsibility to maintain the yard, so he should call him. But that hasn't stopped him from telling me to cut the grass, complain about weeds, etc. Each time, I tell him that he needs to tell my landlord if he has a problem with it.

He has a family but from what I've seen, his wife is very quiet and keeps to herself with the two young kids a lot.

I'm just getting so fed up, and kind of creeped out because of how much he's staring. Recently I've started wearing noise cancelling headphones when I come and go from my house, and ignoring him when he yells stuff over the fence when Claire and I are hanging out, but that's honestly made things worse. What can Claire and I do?

tldr - being driven up the wall by a busybody neighbor.

QuarkJets
Sep 8, 2008

Smirking_Serpent posted:

WIBTA for getting rid of wasps against wifes wishes?

So we have these super agressive wasps which are basically yellow jackets on meth. They will NOT leave you alone if you dont dIsturb them and there are several nests near the house. We run to dodge them when we go to the car. The wasps sting are supposedly 10x worse pain than a yellowjacket or bee. Miraculously nobodys gotten stings yet but our 14 year old son is scared to death of them. I am pretty scared of them too, they are loving dangerous. My wife whines whenever we talk about spraying them. She says that you shouldnt kill pollinators and they just want food and water and dont want to sting. My son almost got stung the other day. WIBTA for taking it upon myself to slay these fuckers and defy my wife? We ate being terrorized by them but i think my wife will be livid... She just doesnt give a drat about our safety. Am i the rear end in a top hat?

Wasps are not pollinators, but they do serve a helpful predator role. Still though, call someone cause that sounds lovely

Evil Willow
Apr 26, 2007
Bored now...
My (26M) fiancee (26F) 3 years relationship is having conflict with my mother and also wants to invite a ton of random questionable people to our wedding who I don't want there

quote:

My fiancee Ella and I met three years ago at an alumni mixer at our college. The only conflict in our relationship has been due to her travelling so often for her job (she's an epidemiologist) and my desire to stay close to my family. My fiancee comes from a broken home and doesn't entirely get how important family is to me.

This has become an increasingly difficult issue as we plan our wedding, which will be in April. Originally, Ella wanted a small wedding of 25-40 friends and family. I agreed to this at first, but after consulting my mother who wants to plan the wedding I realized that we would have to plan for 100-125 guests to include my parents' extended family. Ella was hesitant at first but agreed after I explained how important family is to me.

To accommodate the change of plans, my parents offered to pay for all wedding expenses besides the bridal and bridesmaids dresses. Ella and I had planned to pay ourselves, but she agreed to this. My mom also made a few suggestions, which seemed reasonable since she is paying. We moved the venue from the church my fiancee was confirmed in to the the community church my family goes to, and moved the reception. Ella was fine with all this, saying she only wanted to "marry the man she loved and look good doing it."

Recently there's been a little conflict between my mom and Ella. My mom went to the fitting and thinks that the dress Ella picked out is inappropriate since it's red. Ella refuses to compromise on the dress, and it's already been fitted and ordered so it can't be changed now and my mom is a bit disappointed about this. For her part Ella is disappointed about the menu for the reception since she's from an Asian culture and my parents didn't include any of her entree suggestions, but I tried to explain that this makes sense since no one at the wedding besides her and the one sibling she's kept in contact with are from her culture and they wouldn't like the food.

The big issue though is the guestlist. Ella insisted that she invite enough people to fill the bride's side, saying she will feel humiliated if it's "just my family." Some of the people she's chosen are pretty questionable though, from some high school friends who recently spent time in prison for cultivating marijuana to two guys she had a threesome in college with. She says I'm being jealous and that they shared a truly important but ephemeral moment of oneness due to being high on LSD at the time.

She also wants to invite ten people she met at a conference for her research a couple years ago. I don't have a problem with them personally but the last time we went to dinner with them, they got in a loud argument about the life cycle of some parasite that pigs catch from bats and I don't want a repeat of this at my wedding.

And then there's my ex girlfriend from college, Amy. I dumped Amy after she cheated on me with some guy from the basketball team. She ended up getting pregnant with him and dropped out of school to have the kid. She has still contacted me a few times since then when it hasn't worked out with whatever guy she's been seeing and drunkenly tries to get back together with me or hook up. She's apparently had another kid with a different guy since college too. I do not want Amy at my wedding, especially bringing her kids and who knows what other guy she's currently seeing. Amy and I are not friends and I do not want her at my wedding, but Ella seems to think that means I'm not over her and is annoyed at me. Her logic is that I was with her for more than a year so she was an important part of my past that I should be comfortable acknowledging, like she is comfortable with those guys from her threesome. I think this is beyond ridiculous but I cannot seem to reason with her.

I just don't get why she is inviting all these random people. They are not from her family and most of them she's not even close with. I've made it clear what my problems are with each one I have an objection to but she doesn't understand the issue and they remain on the guest list and I'm worried that any day she could go and mail off save-the-date cards to all these people I don't want at my wedding.

Finally there's a potential conflict with her maid of honor and my best man. For her maid of honor she chose a friend who's highly involved in social activism and got arrested at a BLM protest in our city a couple months ago. My best man happens to be a cop. I don't know if he was involved in her arrest or if he was even on duty at that protest, and I know she has the right to choose whoever she wants as her maid of honor, I just feel like it could end up being a bad decision.

So those are all of the things that have been coming up and I feel like it could all explode at any moment. How can I stop this from getting out of control?

TL;DR fiancee hasn't been getting along with my mother who is trying to plan our wedding and is also set on inviting a bunch of people who have no reason to be invited. What can I do to get through to her so that she changes this behavior?

Midnight Voyager
Jul 2, 2008

Lipstick Apathy

Lucrece posted:

My (26M) fiancee (26F) 3 years relationship is having conflict with my mother and also wants to invite a ton of random questionable people to our wedding who I don't want there

Hahaha oh my god the asian family reveal! Hey guys, did you know red is a very traditional wedding dress color in multiple Asian cultures, especially China? Bet these fucks who can't even deign to eat foreign food don't!

The threesome thing would be weird if she wasn't pretty blatantly passive-aggressively acting out against all this bullshit.

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AARD VARKMAN
May 17, 1993

Lucrece posted:

My (26M) fiancee (26F) 3 years relationship is having conflict with my mother and also wants to invite a ton of random questionable people to our wedding who I don't want there

Some of the people she's chosen are pretty questionable though, from some high school friends who recently spent time in prison for cultivating marijuana to two guys she had a threesome in college with. She says I'm being jealous and that they shared a truly important but ephemeral moment of oneness due to being high on LSD at the time. 

ahahaha

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