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i like how he points out the contract on the bottle like she wouldn't have had any basis to get mad at him about it because "ma'am if yo u had READ THE BOTTLE youd' see that you agreed to this"
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Aug 6, 2019 05:16
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I generally avoid TIFU because it's kinda gross and nothing ever happened. But once in a while, you find something special.
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Aug 6, 2019 06:28
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TIFU by sleeping with a married woman. So, this is gonna be long and one hell of a ride. NSFW or for anyone, really. And I may not be alive much longer, because I’m probably going to be murdered. I’m at the bar the other night, watching the Hall of Fame Game. After it’s over, I go over to charge my phone, and get one last drink before I Uber home. This girl sitting next to me, very attractive. Out of my league. Like wayyy out. I’m just scrolling through memes on my phone. And she asks me “hey! Can I trust you to watch my things and not drug me?” “Uhh what?” “Can you watch my stuff while I go pee and not drug me” to which the bartender said “oh you can trust Greg, he’s really nice”. Annnd this is where the bartender hosed up. Girl comes back from the bathroom, sits back down and started to talk to me. Just random poo poo. Showed pictures of our dogs to each other. Talked about shows n stuff. Typical ‘meet a girl at a bar’ flirting poo poo. She asks if I’ve ever seen the show Years and Years. I say “no, but I’ve seen the band perform live”. So she goes on about how great the show is, and how I need to watch it. Asks if I have HBOGO. “Yes because I forgot to cancel my cable after GoT”. So she makes me download the APP, so I could start watching it when I get home. Thanks for the recommendation! I’ll probably check it out never. So a few minutes later, she said “hey do you live close by?” “Yea, like half a mile” “we should go watch the show right now, we can curl up on your couch and watch it together. I have a bottle of whiskey in my car” “Idk, my house is kind of a mess right now” “That’s okay, I have pets too” (or something like that. All I was thinking was that this girl wants to bang at this point) “I mean I guess, but I have to be at work early tomorrow” “That’s okay, I can only stay 30-40 minutes and then I’ll have to go home” “That’s fine” heh, cuz that’s all the time I’ll need! AM I RIGHT, FELLAS?? No. Nononono, this was probably one of the biggest mistakes of my life at this point. It’s about, 11pm at this point. I think? And mind you, I’ve only been talking this girl for maybe 20 minutes. So we tab out, get in her car. Which is a stick shift. And I say “oh no poo poo, I like you even more now! No one drives a stick anymore! I drive one every day!” Which I’m excited about, because at this point I’m thinking to myself “hmm this girl is hot, has tattoos, likes shows I like, and imma bout to get laid” We talked about driving a stick shift the whole time on the way to my house (this is important, because it wasn’t the first time that this subject came up). Which is just a half mile away. So was a short drive. She parks behind my car, blocking my car in. Go inside, I try to clean up a little bit as she meets and plays with my dog. While I try to get my Chromecast set up on my living room TV. Ya know, to “watch HBOGO”. She runs outside to her to grab the bottle of whiskey. It’s loving Evan Williams. And this is the first time where an “oh no” thought crosses my mind. Kids, I’ve slept with some strange in my time. I don’t know how or why I get myself into these situations. I honestly feel that I’m a decent looking, charming, sometimes funny, nice person. Sure I troll the gently caress out of people on the interwebs, but I do genuinely care about other people. Being nice does pay off, and karma is a real thing. But in this case, I was dead wrong. So after some talking about random poo poo. We get the show playing. I couldn’t even tell you what happened in the first few moments of that show, because she gets up grabs me by the hand, and leads me into my bedroom. Sex. So after, we’re just laying there. Pillow talk. Was a good night. I just got laid. She asked if she could stay the night. We’re gonna go to sleep. Everything is cool. I let her know that I have to be at work in a few hours, so I need to get some rest. Now, up to this point in the story, it all sounds like a great night. Pulled off another one night stand. high fives all around Right? Wrong. I say “that was great we should do this again sometime” “I don’t think so” “What why?” “I don’t think my husband would appreciate that” I am speechless. I don’t think I’ve ever felt my heart skip that many beats ever. Millions of thoughts crossed my mind all at once. Like, how the gently caress did I not see this coming. Omg imma home wrecker. I’m probably gonna get shot of he finds out. Me: “Ummmmmmm WHAT? Is this an open relationship? Does he know where you’re at? Like, why didn’t you tell me that?” Her: “idk, does it matter?” “Uh yeah, I’d be pretty pissed if I was him” Now I’ve been cheated on before. And that feeling sucks. I’ve been in a similar situation like, 10 years ago. Where I didn’t know that I was sleeping with someone who had a bf at the time. I had found out a couple days later, and I found him on fb and let him know. He thanked me, and didn’t get mad at me at all. Cheating is the worse thing ever. So this is where poo poo starts to hit the fan. I don’t remember the exact conversation, but it went something like this: Her: “we’re getting separated soon” Me: “well you’re still loving married to him” “Yea but that’s okay” “How is that okay?” “He’s been..... abusive” There’s a slight pause, then she starts crying. So this is where the sober me starts to kick in. This girl is struggling. She’s in a bad spot. And no one should ever lay a finger on a woman. And now I’m trying to empathize with this trashy Evan Williams drinking bitch. Like I legit felt bad from all the poo poo that she was telling me. Que the panic attack. She starts going nuts. Ripping posters off my wall, running around my house butt naked. Knocking poo poo over. Basically trashing my house. She asks me to get her medicine out of her purse. Which I do. She takes it. And calms down. (For the most part). Now this is like, 2 or 3 am now. I tell her that we need to go to sleep. Because I have to work in the morning. She tells me “(bartender) was right, you are a really great guy” Btw, Evan Williams isn’t that bad when you’re slightly inebriated and you just had sex with a crazy bitch. We finally get to sleep around 4? Maybe? I wake up late, she wants round 3. And who doesn’t like morning sex. I’m still kinda drunk at this point, and could give 0 fucks. So I gave her a gently caress. Anyways, I need to leave for work. But her car is blocking mine. I tell her that she needs to move hers, but she can’t because she didn’t know where her clothes were. And told me I couldn’t move it because “I didn’t know how to drive it” “Uhh, this is the third time we’ve had this conversation. I drive a stick every day, I can move your car” I move her car. I leave for work. And I just let her stay at my house. I let her stay because one, the poo poo that she told me about her husband is pretty crazy. Two, I was already running late, and gently caress it she’ll probably leave before I get home. A couple hours into my shift, she stops responding to my texts. I get concerned, because I’m starting to sober up, and piecing all this poo poo together. I came to the conclusion that I should find the husband on fb, and message him, letting him know what happened.... BUT, I see that she had already messaged him. FROM MY FACEBOOK ACCOUNT! My computer was still logged into fb when I left, and I didn’t think to log out or shut it off or anything. I tell my boss about everything that has happened up until this point. He lets me go home. When I get home, I find her still naked in my bed. I get her friend to get her an Uber. And I leave. Oh also had the sex one more time because 🤷♂️. Go back to work. Thinking everything is over. That’s the end of that. Wrong again. I get home from work, to find her on my couch wearing one of my shirts. And only that shirt. Like vag all out and everything. This girl is afraid to go home. Which I’m worried about at this point. Because I want her to go somewhere safe. She’s refusing to reach out to any friends and what not. Oh yea, she had me find her phone. Which had 40 something messages and 28 missed calls from her husband. And several others from other people. She hands me $20 to order a pizza. And after we eat the pizza, she’d Uber home. Fuckin bet. I ordered the pizza, and she wanted one last round of the sex before the pizza got there. I kid you not. I’m sitting on one end of the couch, her on the other. And she just opens her legs and says “make it quick” This bitch has already hit and kicked me, trashed my house, and I’m just ready for her to leave. Sex. After, we’re just sitting there, and she starts crying again. Asking to go home. And I’m like “I’ll get you an Uber home, but you gotta put pants on” “No” “What do you mean ‘no’? You can’t get in an Uber with your pussy out” “No” So I gather up all of her belongings and clothes. And try to help her get dressed. To which she refused to allow me to do. Most guys will agree, one of the hottest things ever... That “arch” thing that women do when you’re pulling their panties off is a loving amazing feeling. I had the same feeling when I got her panties ON. Pizza arrives. I go outside, sign for the pizza n stuff. Come back inside. Panties are off again. God dammit. We never even opened the pizza box. She’s saying that she wants to go home. But is refusing to get dressed. I’m starting to panic myself. Because I don’t know how I got myself into this situation. But, am me. She eventually hands me her phone, with the conversation that’s she having with her husband. And I read through the conversation, it’s her sending multiple texts saying “I’m so sorry babe” “idk where I’m at” “come get me”. And him saying “nope sorry” “this is on you” and “call 911” That last one though. That’s what I did. Before I called 911, I offered to drive her car back to the bar where we met, because I knew the husband would give her a ride back there. And not to my house. Because now I’m starting to worry about my safety. I don’t want homeboy to show up on my porch with a shotty. But then again she states that “you don’t know how to drive my car” with it being a stick and all. Even though this is 4th or 5th time this was brought up in conversation. I told them that I have an inebriated woman in my house that is refusing to leave, even though she wants to leave. Etc. I tried to call our one mutual friend, (the bartender from the previous night) but she didn’t answer. The ~20 minutes before the cops arrived were the most awkward 20 minutes of my life. This girl is drunk crying. Trying to get me to go for yet another round. Where at this point, my dick hurts. Also, “girl you need to get dressed, you’re gonna be going home” Finally got her panties back on, I didn’t tell her that I had called the cops. I told her that the Uber was coming. And was trying to get her to put her pants on. Cops show up, I go outside. Explain the situation, was kind of freaking out. But I kept my calm. I told them that I was concerned about her safety, because of all the poo poo that she told me about her husband. But they can’t force her to go anywhere she didn’t want to. She wanted to go home. Officers ask if she was presentable. I pop my head back in the door. She’s still wearing my shirt and her panties. So I’m like “I guess?”, and then I let them in. She yells “are you loving serious? You called the cops?” “Uh yea, you didn’t wanna leave. Even though you said you did. Plus your husband said to call 911, so that’s what I did” The officer said to her “you’re on this man’s property, and he wants you to leave” Que crying and what not. Cops ask me to gather all of her stuff. Which I do. Her husband calls her phone, so I accept the call, and then put it up to her face. Tell her to tell him what’s happening. And that she is getting an Uber home. Apparently her card and PayPal was getting declined for the ride. So she couldn’t do it herself. They live like 5 miles away from me, so it was only $8 or something. I live pretty close to downtown, so ordering a Lyft/Uber usually takes 2-3 minutes after calling for one. Once cops tell her that her ride is on the way, and gonna be here within 2 minutes... Girl finally decides to get dressed. I had to help a 30 year old woman put pants on... I could see the officer’s partner struggling to keep a straight face during that ordeal. Lol. Anyways, I hand her hat, keys, bra, shirt (she’s still wearing mine) to the officer. Made sure she had all of her belongings. We get her to walk out of my house to the Uber. But she tried to grab the bottle of Evan Williams. To where I audibly laughed. “I don’t think they’ll let you take that” Cops didn’t let her take it. She got in the Uber and she was gone. Policeman handed me the bottle back. Where I say “usually this is the other way around, ha” Po-po leave, I call it a night, and it’s over. Flash forward to today. I get a message from our mutual friend (the bartender) and she’s asking if crazy girls keys are at my house. I was at work at the time. So I wasn’t able to check. But I’m 98% certain I handed those over to the cops. I look for them when I get home. Found nothing. Oh, and this girls car is still parked across the street from my house. So that brings us to now. I haven’t heard anything from her. Or the husband. And I’m not sure if it’s safe for me to go home. But ya. Know what? gently caress it. I’m glad I could share this story with y’all. There might be more to come, but you’ll probably have to read about it in my obituary. The moral of the story is, drug every girl that asks you not to drug them at a bar. 😂 Jk don’t do that. And don’t stick your dick in crazy. TLDR: Took a girl home who I didn't know was married. She trashed my house. Edit: I’m not gonna change “que” to “cue” because gently caress you, deal with my mistakes while I deal with mine. Edit 2: the messages, https://imgur.com/gallery/jju2GIa Edit 3: her car is still there. Can’t get it towed, because it’s on a public street. I’m still alive. I see a lot of you have sent me messages privately. I’ll get to them when I can. Edit 4: FML. I sent her a text saying that she needs to come get her car. No response. Bartender texted me late last night and asked if I used a condom. Which many of you have asked.... And no. I didn't. The girl told me that she was on birth control and that she's allergic to latex. So I think I may have been baby baited. Edit 5: I’m still not dead. Her car is still in front of my across the street neighbor’s house. I just happened to see said neighbor step outside to smoke a cigarette. So I walked across the street to tell her about the circumstances of getting that car towed, since it’s front of their house... This woman is only wearing a bra and either boy shorts or short shorts. And she’s most likely high on meth. Because when I asked her “hey do you wanna get this car that’s in front of your house towed?” She said “no, noooo hehe” I’m like “yea, I’ll talk to y’all tomorrow” just wtf.
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Aug 6, 2019 06:28
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That’s the good stuff mmmmm
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Aug 6, 2019 06:36
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oh wow a generic bitches so crazy story
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Aug 6, 2019 06:45
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Smirking_Serpent posted:The girl told me that she was on birth control and that she's allergic to latex. So I think I may have been baby baited.  Though tbh the whole story is worthy of that response
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Aug 6, 2019 06:46
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snergle posted:the only reason she needs is tipping culture and it being the week end at a bar? if you havent worked as waitstaff or a bartender ( i havent been a bartender so maybe they dont get as good of tips) but fri sat sun are the superbowl of getting good tips and some restraunts rotate the staff so they get one week end day a month and some are cut throat as gently caress and its hard to get those days. Her brother owns the bar so she probably just asked to get every sat sun for the extra cash and this dipshit probably doesnt realise that a three fourths of her pay is because she works the weekends. There's nothing in the story that implies they need the money though. This thread consistently sides against people making GBS threads on their SO in the name of money. If their relationship was good and they aren't in money trouble then she's an rear end in a top hat for forcibly taking up a shift that precludes his favorite hobby.
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Aug 6, 2019 07:02
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his "favourite hobby" is watching television all day
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Aug 6, 2019 07:03
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Jabor posted:his "favourite hobby" is watching television all day Much like anime watching football is not a real hobby. All the aboard the derail train
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Aug 6, 2019 07:06
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Jabor posted:his "favourite hobby" is watching television all day Football is like 6 hours once a week. He seems like an rear end in a top hat in this mostly because the hobby he chooses is a bro thing, but I don't think there's any evidence he isn't doing enough for his family. I can accept that he over represents his commitment to his family, but as written she took up an unnecessary shift in the name of her family's business that poo poo on his most important hobby. There's no way we'd be talking about this with the roles reversed.
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Aug 6, 2019 07:10
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SpaceSDoorGunner posted:Much like anime watching football is not a real hobby. Football is basically shonen
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Aug 6, 2019 07:14
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Total daytime silence a reasonable expectation for night shifter? Trying to figure out how to handle what is somewhat of a recurring argument between my wife [36F] and I [39M], married, 3 years. She works nights sometimes and I work from home. We have a school aged daughter that sometimes is home with me while I work and the wife sleeps. We have a routine for these days so that nobody is on the top floor with the wife sleeping and we do most activities on the other side of the house one floor down. We have a white noise generator and a fan on high in the bedroom. We talk at a normal to soft volume and avoid loud activities, running around in the house, and other common sense stuff. But sometimes it's just not enough. A few months ago wifey was angry with us for making too much noise playing Monopoly. Today she was upset that my daugher and her friend had come in from the back yard to eat lunch and although they didn't actually wake her up (she had to pee) she couldn't get back to sleep because she could "hear them talking." The kids were inside for about 20 minutes when she came down stairs, and said there was no way she could go back to sleep now. This was at 1:30PM and her shift doesnt start till 7PM. So she goes to the gym and other things, tries to nap later, and can't. Now it's all my fault she didnt sleep enough and shes demanding an apology and that I "show some remorse." I'm on board with apologizing when I've done something wrong, but playing a board game or eating lunch doesn't seem like something I should be apologizing for. It sucks that she has a hard time falling asleep with daytime sounds, and I do what I can, but I don't think I can take responsibility for absolute silence. Any night shifters out there (or spouses thereof) that can help me to set some realistic expectations? TL;DR What's a reasonable amount of noise during the day? Should I be apologizing for what I think is pretty reasonable noise?
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Aug 6, 2019 07:17
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chitoryu12 posted:AITA for reacting negatively after a date told me she was a mom? I mean what was he supposed to do? Pretend he was fine with it for the rest of his life to spare her feelings for one day until she gets over it and goes on her next date? Not everyone wants kids, and I think it's a bigger problem when they're not honest about it. (See all the stories here about couples that wind up at odds about having kids because they mislead each other or whatnot).
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Aug 6, 2019 07:18
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My [30F] boyfriend [34M] does not dress appropriately for the occasion and I don't know how to tell him. We've been friends for a while, dating for about 6 months. We just moved in together. As usual, things are great and I love him so much! He's so kind, so thoughtful and open-minded. But....he has no fashion sense. I don't like fashion as a hobby, but I think I dress and take care of myself nicely and professionally. I don't get enjoyment out of coordinating outfits, but I do feel more confident looking nice and it's important to me to not stand out for looking a certain way in a crowd. He is a professor and dresses...nice-ish for work. Even then I'd say it's not professional but he still has a job so I guess it isn't bad. But not at work, he will wear almost anything anywhere. Something like gym shorts and a gross t-shirt is acceptable for going out to the store, to the movies, etc. I'm starting to become more aware of these issues the more we spend time together, and I know he is really sensitive. I find him attractive, but I absolutely am more attracted to him in nicer outfits than not. This issue is becoming more prominent as we go to nicer events and he still wears shorts to say, a fundraiser type event. He's really sensitive so I do not want to shame or hurt his feelings. I'd like to come across as helpful, but not rude. Is there any tactful way to say I want to help him dress nicer? I just want to not stand out at professional events anymore  Tl;Dr boyfriend isn't fashion savvy and I don't know how to help kindly
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Aug 6, 2019 07:18
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TheAardvark posted:Football is like 6 hours once a week. He seems like an rear end in a top hat in this mostly because the hobby he chooses is a bro thing, but I don't think there's any evidence he isn't doing enough for his family. I can accept that he over represents his commitment to his family, but as written she took up an unnecessary shift in the name of her family's business that poo poo on his most important hobby. There's no way we'd be talking about this with the roles reversed. his most important hobby of watching television for six hours once a week i would absolutely take the same position if the husband was the one working a shift while the wife was wanting to spend a six-hours stint every sunday binge-watching Golden Girls while expecting their partner to keep the kids entertained
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Aug 6, 2019 07:21
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Smirking_Serpent posted:TIFU by sleeping with a married woman. Amazing, bigly great.
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Aug 6, 2019 07:22
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Jabor posted:his most important hobby of watching television for six hours once a week Well I just can't agree with that. If my wife thought that her once a week Golden Girls thing was important enough that I saw her do it literally our entire relationship, every weekend in the winter, I would feel like a shithead for taking a shift that precluded her doing that unless we had reasons to need that money.
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Aug 6, 2019 07:27
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MasBrillante posted:oh wow a generic bitches so crazy story That story is generic to you? Wtf?
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Aug 6, 2019 07:30
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bf (36M) wants to get oral sex from another woman thanks to my (31F) TMJ issues I suffer from TMJ issues (cannot keep my mouth open for long periods of time or in an O shape without my jaw dislocating; painful and causes headaches). Boyfriend of over 6 months is obsessed with getting oral sex however I cannot provide that for him. He has expressed to me that he needs OS badly. To the point where he now wants to find another woman to do the task regularly and I feel disgusted and hurt that he has to seek another woman for sexual pleasure. He claims that he loves me but needs oral so bad that he would have probably cheated. He thought it was the right thing to tell me how he was feeling first. It's not like I get a say in it because he was going to do it regardless. His options are to pay for it or find some young girl to do it but he expressed that if he goes the second route, kissing and other sexual acts might be involved so the other girl gets something out of it and not feel used but I definitely don't feel comfortable with that. My question is should I be okay with this request and let him find another woman or should I break up with him? What do I get out of this? It's like I'm letting him "have his cake and eat it too." I don't want to seek another man but what would make this request even? Feel like I'm an lose/lose situation. TL;DR: boyfriend not satisfied with me to fulfill the one sex act he loves the most and wants to get it from another female. Should I stay or should I go?
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Aug 6, 2019 07:36
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That story is fake as poo poo Edit: the Thank Evan Williams, I Just Got Laid Story I mean. I absolutely believe that the I Deserve A Dick Sucking Hall Pass guy is real. andrew smash fucked around with this message at 07:39 on Aug 6, 2019 |
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Aug 6, 2019 07:36
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andrew smash posted:That story is fake as poo poo sorry pick/anne but crazy women do exist
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Aug 6, 2019 07:48
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TMJ is the loving worst.
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Aug 6, 2019 08:00
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Let’s not forget that the guy seems to be incapable of making a single good decision (kicking her out) without first choosing to gently caress a rando rawdog, gently caress her after finding out she’s married, allow her to stay over by herself all day so he can gently caress her more after she wrecks his place, and then after deciding he’s gotta kick her at after all this, fucks her again. Oh and try to get in the middle of a thing with a husband who is either 1. abusive 2. or continue to have sex with a woman who is okay with calling her husband abusive in order to stall dealing with the fact she just cheated on him. Woman may be crazy (or apparently, a junkie) but this dude is well into too horny and stupid to live territory.
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Aug 6, 2019 08:05
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Men will get used to dodging knives if it means getting laid on the reg
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Aug 6, 2019 08:12
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My (20M) girlfriend’s (23F) parents “don’t foresee wanting to meet me again? I met her parents for the first time. They asked what I liked doing and I told them I love to cook, help people grow, and one day I want to own my own restaurant. Apparently they were really turned off by this because my girlfriend told me they said it sounded like I’m not doing anything with my life, since I’m choosing to spend my career path in restaurants. And for this reason, she said, they don’t foresee ever wanting to meet me again. What do I do about this? Tl;dr - my girlfriends parents said I’m not doing anything with my life because I want to spend it in restaurants, and because of this they don’t want to meet me again.
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Aug 6, 2019 08:20
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I wonder what the parents do what career track the gf is on UPDATE: I checked his profile and he has a full sleeve Star Wars tattoo  immediately parents have good judgementHe also comments on porn subs, with a light incel vibe Butter Activities fucked around with this message at 08:45 on Aug 6, 2019 |
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Aug 6, 2019 08:42
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I decided to bite and I dont regret it at all. Cunshitter your website is best. I specially like the side menu, the one activated by cute little bars on top. What's the minimum investment, in nuts?
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Aug 6, 2019 08:49
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I forgot I was hundreds of pages behind. Go me! I am an idiot. Cumshitter.com
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Aug 6, 2019 08:50
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AITA for buying a kid some cigarettes? Last month I went to a one year old's birthday party. The parents are both close friends of mine and we've all known each other for 10+ years. Alongside the normal gifts of toys and clothes, I decided to buy a packet of cigs and wrap them up, too. I thought it would be funny for the parents to open them and to see how inappropriate they are for a one year-old, only to laugh and then presumably give them to the dad (who still smokes). It was meant to be a throwaway gift at best; we've had a history of bad-taste jokes being made at each other's expense, and so I thought it would be well received. I was very wrong. Instead of taking it as a joke, I've received messages calling me an idiot, 'What the gently caress was I thinking', it's "disgusting", "inappropriate", etc. I'm shocked. I figured it would be like buying a child a bottle off whiskey, or a lottery ticket: an obvious joke gift which is still safe to handle and sealed in a packet, and would be more of a joke for the parents (at the child's expense.) The kid is 1 and won't remember the gift or even be bothered, so what's the harm? I've since messaged the family and now find it weird that I'm having to forensically deconstruct my joke in order to explain my rationale. I'm stunned that she's had such a sense of humour failure. My intentions were never to offend. TLDR: I bought a 1 year-old child some gifts and also bought a packet of fags for a laugh. His family now hates me and have sent me messages to that effect. Reddit- Am I The Arsehole? Edit: just for clarity, the dad smokes and shows no sign of quitting. The arsehole-o-meter seems pretty 50/50... I was hoping it would be one-sided! I've since apologised anyway because what's the point of trying to score points. I've said that it wasn't my intention, I was just trying to be funny and I'm sorry for upsetting anyone. Thanks everyone for your opinions.
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Aug 6, 2019 08:51
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Lmao @ this Star Wars tattoo having nude model roasting playa  Given that he’s been getting Star Wars tattoos for over 2 years since Jesus what parent would let their fail son do, it looks like he’s at least 21, probably not in any sort of academic or trade track, built like a 15 year old, covered in dorky lovely tats and his two hobbies are arguing about baseball and video games.
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Aug 6, 2019 08:53
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Dawncloack posted:I forgot I was hundreds of pages behind. Go me! I am an idiot. Totally okay, Mr. Shitter's website deserves a mention every few pages.
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Aug 6, 2019 09:58
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Most parents basically think they've done a good job if their son is alive and not in prison by 18.
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Aug 6, 2019 10:02
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Smirking_Serpent posted:My (20M) girlfriend’s (23F) parents “don’t foresee wanting to meet me again? They don't want their daughter dating a feeder
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Aug 6, 2019 10:49
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When I started getting into spicy foods, I made the mistake of ordering a bottle of Mad Dog 357. It's not a hot sauce but a pepper extract, which means it's absurdly hot without any kind of flavor or value to the food. It adds nothing but pain, and even a small dab on a toothpick is enough to ruin an entire dish. I eventually threw it out.
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Aug 6, 2019 11:18
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AITA for being pissed at a girl who wouldn’t take off her shirt?quote:I was playing truth or dare with one of my friends when she came over and we got a bit drunk. She dared me to take off my shirt and dance while she rubbed Nutella all over my chest. I later dared her to do the same thing to which she said no. I told her that it’s unfair that I have to do that and she doesn’t. She said since she’s a girl she’s exempt from it and I’m not. I told her that she’s being sexist and I wouldn’t play with her anymore if she was going to be like that so she eventually let me.
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Aug 6, 2019 11:37
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TIFU by leaving my cum tissues on my table (nsfw)quote:This happened not too long before i went on a trip.
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Aug 6, 2019 11:51
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You want ants? Because that's how you get ants.
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Aug 6, 2019 11:52
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Think this guy has big issues if his cum can attract a literal horde of ants just by sitting around in a crumpled tissue for less than a day
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Aug 6, 2019 11:56
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Cum so sweet, Ants go crazy for it.
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Aug 6, 2019 11:57
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Jack-Off Lantern posted:Cum so sweet, Ants go crazy for it. Nectar of the (ant) gods
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Aug 6, 2019 12:02
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