TMMadman posted:

Schnorkles once punched his baby son, Schnirkles, for spilling a mere 1/4 gallon of jet fuel despite the fact that he has a 10000 gallon surplus.

clockwork chaos posted:

My younger sister, who was pretty liberal when I left about six years ago. And that's why I ran away screaming from Texas into the arms of my wife

Edit: this was unprompted

clockwork chaos posted:

My younger sister, who was pretty liberal when I left about six years ago. And that's why I ran away screaming from Texas into the arms of my wife

Edit: this was unprompted

cumshitter posted:

schnirkles sometimes calls up my son cobra commander and cries about how abusive schnorkles is to his son. its really sad.

Hamelekim posted:

https://twitter.com/ChrisMurphyCT/status/1161341843323392000

clockwork chaos posted:

My younger sister, who was pretty liberal when I left about six years ago. And that's why I ran away screaming from Texas into the arms of my wife

Edit: this was unprompted

TMMadman posted:

there is no Child Protection Services for planes.

Happy Noodle Boy posted:

your first reply reminded me of this


https://twitter.com/russianmemesltd/status/1095023159022018560?s=21

Der Meister posted:

yea uh she’s full blown chud and is beyond saving



I....i’m sorry

tacodaemon posted:

https://mobile.twitter.com/nkulw/status/1161337687279919104
https://mobile.twitter.com/nkulw/status/1161342746441015296

clockwork chaos posted:

My younger sister, who was pretty liberal when I left about six years ago. And that's why I ran away screaming from Texas into the arms of my wife

Edit: this was unprompted

clockwork chaos posted:

My younger sister, who was pretty liberal when I left about six years ago. And that's why I ran away screaming from Texas into the arms of my wife

Edit: this was unprompted

MysteriousStranger posted:

Terror Season 2 out on prime now

A Handed Missus posted:

smarxist posted:

reignofevil posted:

"I love Donald Trump. I love Donald trump. I really really love Donald trump."

*you use some words that don't involve the phrase Donald Trump*

"So... you're saying you love Donald Trump????"

smarxist posted:

Fellatio del Toro posted:

had dinner with a bunch of extended family last week and every single one of their brains has turned to mush over the last few years. they were all loving losing their minds about trpim being called a white supremacist, saying white supremacy doesn't exist anymore, etc

30 minutes later my uncle was talking about how they visited Stone Mountain and how awesome it was

Other highlights include:

• uncle's wife has been emailing the president to apologize for the mean things people say to him
  
• buttigieg is not a real Christian because he's gay
  
• actual quote: "they throw water on police officers but they think it's ok to kill babies?"
  
• democrats are turning their back on Israel will bring about the end times
  
• Democrat Jews are not Real Jews, none of them can even tell you what tribe they're from
  
• other uncle is not a racist because he trusts his black neighbor to get his mail
  
• first uncle said "Alexandria Ortega[sic] Cortez" in Mexican accent
  
• at one point in the night three cell phones went off at the exact same time with the Fox News Breaking Alert sound
  

quote:

Andy Dick, the controversial comedian who was last year charged with sexual battery, said he was knocked unconscious outside of a comedy club.

The embattled comic had just finished a performance at One-Eyed Jack’s in New Orleans’ French Quarter on Saturday (August 10) when his head was reportedly slammed into the cement.

“Andy was standing in front of the club when the guy cold cocked him while he was talking to someone,” Robert Couvillion, his booking agent, told New Orleans’ Fox 8.

“His head fell into the wall, then fell into the motorcycle, then cracked on the cement.”

Dick told Nola.com that he was “knocked out 100 percent for 15 minutes” following the alleged attack.

His head fell into the wall, then into the motorcycle, then cracked on the cement.
“We thought he was dead,” Couvillion added.

The artist was taken by ambulance to a hospital, where he was kept under observation for what he said was a “possible brain bleed.”

According to Couvillion, “Andy was on his best behavior” during Saturday’s show and gave nobody reason to want to attack him.

“Some of his shows are a little wilder. Every show is different. This show was mostly story telling. He didn’t disrespect anyone,” he told Nola.com

After enjoying early success in the 1990s, the 2000s has seen Dick’s career tainted by struggles with drug and alcohol abuse, and a series of allegations of sexually inappropriate behaviour towards both men and underage women.

In 2007 he was famously dragged off the set of Jimmy Kimmel Live! After fondling the future First Daughter Ivanka Trump.

In late 2007, Laugh Factory owner Jamie Masada, who witnessed the assault, said, "Jon Lovitz picked Andy up by the head and smashed him into the bar four or five times, and blood started pouring out of his nose." Lovitz told Page Six, "All the comedians are glad I did it because this guy is a dickhole."

Dick also has a history of exposing himself to stand-up crowds, though he told the Hollywood Reporter in 2017 that he had curbed these behaviours in light of the Me Too movement.

“I don’t grope people anymore. I don’t expose myself anymore,” he said.

In 2018, Dick plead no contest to a charge of sexual battery after he groped a stranger’s buttocks.

Fellatio del Toro posted:

• democrats are turning their back on Israel will bring about the end times
  

Fellatio del Toro posted:

[*] Democrat Jews are not Real Jews, none of them can even tell you what tribe they're from

Zyla posted:

i dont condone smoking

https://twitter.com/41Strange/status/1161352677910966272

Fellatio del Toro posted:

[*] at one point in the night three cell phones went off at the exact same time with the Fox News Breaking Alert sound

Drunkboxer posted:

its been weird to see a charismaless void who can barely speak build up a cult of personality just because he yells about mexicans

lorn Wayne posted:

thread full of v questionable facts today, iks DO SMOETHING

kaleedity posted:

Fellatio del Toro posted:

had dinner with a bunch of extended family last week and every single one of their brains has turned to mush over the last few years. they were all loving losing their minds about trpim being called a white supremacist, saying white supremacy doesn't exist anymore, etc

30 minutes later my uncle was talking about how they visited Stone Mountain and how awesome it was

Other highlights include:

• uncle's wife has been emailing the president to apologize for the mean things people say to him
  
• buttigieg is not a real Christian because he's gay
  
• actual quote: "they throw water on police officers but they think it's ok to kill babies?"
  
• democrats are turning their back on Israel will bring about the end times
  
• Democrat Jews are not Real Jews, none of them can even tell you what tribe they're from
  
• other uncle is not a racist because he trusts his black neighbor to get his mail
  
• first uncle said "Alexandria Ortega[sic] Cortez" in Mexican accent
  
• at one point in the night three cell phones went off at the exact same time with the Fox News Breaking Alert sound
  

Shageletic posted:

Didnt she get sexually harassed and metood by Hitchcock?

Fellatio del Toro posted:

had dinner with a bunch of extended family last week and every single one of their brains has turned to mush over the last few years. they were all loving losing their minds about trpim being called a white supremacist, saying white supremacy doesn't exist anymore, etc

30 minutes later my uncle was talking about how they visited Stone Mountain and how awesome it was

Other highlights include:

• uncle's wife has been emailing the president to apologize for the mean things people say to him
  
• buttigieg is not a real Christian because he's gay
  
• actual quote: "they throw water on police officers but they think it's ok to kill babies?"
  
• democrats are turning their back on Israel will bring about the end times
  
• Democrat Jews are not Real Jews, none of them can even tell you what tribe they're from
  
• other uncle is not a racist because he trusts his black neighbor to get his mail
  
• first uncle said "Alexandria Ortega[sic] Cortez" in Mexican accent
  
• at one point in the night three cell phones went off at the exact same time with the Fox News Breaking Alert sound
  

snoo posted:

snoo posted: