UKMT August 2019 - we (UK) should simply invade Ireland peacefully

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Debate & Discussion > UKMT August 2019 - we (UK) should simply invade Ireland peacefully

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OwlFancier: Aug 22, 2013

It is quite possible that he'll drag the rest of the tories along aye, I just don't think it's because he's a machiavellian genius as much as they're all spineless and incredibly easily led.

# ? Aug 29, 2019 21:20

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# ? May 27, 2024 13:59

Name Change: Oct 9, 2005

Junior G-man posted:

I'm easily persuaded that BoJo and Cummings have hyped each other up past the point of no return in a fit of "look at us be clever clogs, harf harf". I'm less easily sold the idea that any Tory will have the spine to go through with their sham 'we must defend ourselves from hard Brexit act'.

How many times have we seen this charade, only for them to pull out at the last minute? I really lost count at Soubry alone.

The news is that people will not get needed medicine, so essentially isn't it that Boris has forced everyone to poo poo or get off the pot? There could be actual consequences for all the Tories this time instead of letting May twist in the wind while everyone pretends they're a bulwark against Communism.

# ? Aug 29, 2019 21:21

OwlFancier: Aug 22, 2013

The vertebration and ability of tories to perceive more than a few moments into the future versus the stupidity of boris johnson is not a contest I would like to have, if it's all the same to you. At least not if I'm betting the welfare of most of the UK's population on the outcome tyvm.

# ? Aug 29, 2019 21:27

Pochoclo: Feb 4, 2008; No...; Clapping Larry

There will be a vote of no confidence and there will be some rebel Tories but the vote will be lost by exactly 3 votes, 3 Labour votes, and you all know who it's gonna be.

# ? Aug 29, 2019 21:28

CGI Stardust: Nov 7, 2010; Brexit is but a door,
election time is but a window.

I'll be back

can't believe corbyn voted for brexit once again

# ? Aug 29, 2019 21:29

Failed Imagineer: Sep 22, 2018

Pochoclo posted:

Why does Boris, the largest Tory, not simply eat the others?

If he tried that with Liz she might bring this lad along

# ? Aug 29, 2019 21:31

Junior G-man: Sep 15, 2004; Wrapped in a mystery, inside an enigma

baka kaba posted:

I don't really mean caring in terms of personal interest, more that if there's some "constitutional crisis" and Bojo refuses to resign or whatever, does she care enough to finally step up and interfere?

I dunno, there's people saying that kind of thing and it just sounds like the same hope that "the queen will save us!" only now it's in situation B where she would have more grounds to do it

No, of course she won't interfere. Interfering is what's got one predecessor killed and any of the others who tried into seriously hot water. She'd never be dumb enough to stick her head in the Brexit hornets nest, because that would a) create a whole second constitutional crisis of a monarch not listening to the elected government (define 'elected' loosely atm) and b) she'd lose all that carefully built and post-Diana restored image and popularity with at least half the people. It would be the one move she could make to jeopardise the crown in a serious way, and she's not nearly dumb enough to do it. Nor should she.

And anyone ever thinking that the monarch was gonna ride to the rescue really needs serious help and a stern talking to.

Sodomy Hussein posted:

The news is that people will not get needed medicine, so essentially isn't it that Boris has forced everyone to poo poo or get off the pot? There could be actual consequences for all the Tories this time instead of letting May twist in the wind while everyone pretends they're a bulwark against Communism.

Tories don't give a gently caress about people without insulin or other medicine dying. They had no problem killing off 130,000 people through austerity, so why stop now? A lot of Tories are way more terrified of their local associations or live in Leave districts, I think they made a bet that they can ride it out. Plus they're herd animals who are all terrified of standing out. May paved the way for all this poo poo by hemming and hawing for two years straight.

Junior G-man fucked around with this message at 21:41 on Aug 29, 2019

# ? Aug 29, 2019 21:34

Apraxin: Feb 22, 2006; General-Admiral

Gonzo McFee posted:

UKMT September 2019 : Brexit: A Prorogue-Like.

https://twitter.com/RoryStewartUK/status/1167046610167181312

https://twitter.com/DiscreetLatino/status/1167075760055754752

# ? Aug 29, 2019 21:37

Failed Imagineer: Sep 22, 2018

https://twitter.com/RopesToInfinity/status/1167167668144824322?s=19

# ? Aug 29, 2019 21:37

wocobob: Jan 7, 2014; damages enemies w/ corn

Juche Couture posted:

https://www.theguardian.com/politics/2019/aug/29/senior-tory-rebels-ready-to-back-move-against-no-deal-brexit

�A growing number of senior Tory rebels have signalled they are now prepared to back urgent legislation to thwart a no-deal Brexit after Boris Johnson�s decision to suspend parliament.�

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me, like, eight or nine times, I might start thinking you�re not really a rebel at all!

Why is Gauke's face like that lol

# ? Aug 29, 2019 21:39

OwlFancier: Aug 22, 2013

Who is Emma Kennedy and why does she keep making really dumb tweets?

# ? Aug 29, 2019 21:42

Microplastics: Jul 6, 2007; It's what's for dinner.

wocobob posted:

Why is Gauke's face like that lol

Former justice secretary and man who's trying to keep the poo poo in but it's coming out anyway, David Gauke,

# ? Aug 29, 2019 21:43

Vlex: Aug 4, 2006; I'd rather be a climbing ape than a big titty angel.

Failed Imagineer posted:

If he tried that with Liz she might bring this lad along

Brings new meaning to the term "double breasted"

# ? Aug 29, 2019 21:44

OwlFancier: Aug 22, 2013

If he hunched his shoulders and got a haricut he could be THE LEVELLER, THE MAN COMPOSED ENTIRELY OF HORIZONTAL LINES.

# ? Aug 29, 2019 21:44

Darth Walrus: Feb 13, 2012

OwlFancier posted:

Who is Emma Kennedy and why does she keep making really dumb tweets?

Prolific writer (by any definition of writer) and equally prolific TV actor who's also a Lib Dem. Name a piece of modern British media, and she's probably had some small role in making or performing in it.

# ? Aug 29, 2019 21:46

Microplastics: Jul 6, 2007; It's what's for dinner.

OwlFancier posted:

If he hunched his shoulders and got a haricut he could be THE LEVELLER, THE MAN COMPOSED ENTIRELY OF HORIZONTAL LINES.

"Allow me set things STRAIGHT"

*delivers a knockout blow to arch-nemesis with iconic spirit level*

"Now we're... even" :smug:

# ? Aug 29, 2019 21:52

Jaeluni Asjil: Apr 18, 2018; Sorry I thought you were a landlord when I gave you your old avatar!

The large lad with Her Maj is David Alastair Morgan-Hewitt. An English hotelier best known as the managing director of the Goring Hotel in London, England. He is the Honorary Catering Advisor to the army and a freeman of the City of London.

I googled so you don't have to.

# ? Aug 29, 2019 21:54

Jedit: Dec 10, 2011; Proudly supporting vanilla legends 1994-2014

Junior G-man posted:

Tories don't give a gently caress about people without insulin or other medicine dying. They had no problem killing off 130,000 people through austerity, so why stop now? A lot of Tories are way more terrified of their local associations or live in Leave districts, I think they made a bet that they can ride it out. Plus they're herd animals who are all terrified of standing out. May paved the way for all this poo poo by hemming and hawing for two years straight.

They don't give a gently caress about the people, but this isn't like austerity where it's a bunch of paup strangers whose deaths can be written off as removing a burden on the system because they're strangers to you. Pretty much everyone in the country personally knows someone who might die as a result of this.

# ? Aug 29, 2019 21:55

CGI Stardust: Nov 7, 2010; Brexit is but a door,
election time is but a window.

I'll be back

Jaeluni Asjil posted:

He is the Honorary Catering Advisor to the army

"Quantity has a quality all of its own" - David Alastair Morgan-Hewitt

# ? Aug 29, 2019 21:57

goddamnedtwisto: Dec 31, 2004; If you ask me about the mole people in the London Underground, I WILL be forced to kill you; Fun Shoe

namesake posted:

Because there's only one winner in that contest:

And him being on Her Maj's side is where her constitutional power derives from. The system works!

# ? Aug 29, 2019 21:58

OwlFancier: Aug 22, 2013

Jedit posted:

They don't give a gently caress about the people, but this isn't like austerity where it's a bunch of paup strangers whose deaths can be written off as removing a burden on the system because they're strangers to you. Pretty much everyone in the country personally knows someone who might die as a result of this.

Also unlike austerity it's a lot easier to point the finger at a single decision by a single party at a single point in time. Austerity is by its nature very hard to actually trace the cause and effects of.

# ? Aug 29, 2019 22:00

Vlex: Aug 4, 2006; I'd rather be a climbing ape than a big titty angel.

Jaeluni Asjil posted:

The large lad with Her Maj is David Alastair Morgan-Hewitt. An English hotelier best known as the managing director of the Goring Hotel in London, England. He is the Honorary Catering Advisor to the army and a freeman of the City of London.

I googled so you don't have to.

He looks like he knows how to feed an army.

# ? Aug 29, 2019 22:01

Pochoclo: Feb 4, 2008; No...; Clapping Larry

In the end political power grows out of the end of a fork

# ? Aug 29, 2019 22:02

Microplastics: Jul 6, 2007; It's what's for dinner.

goddamnedtwisto posted:

And him being on Her Maj's side is where her constitutional power derives from. The system works!

Her power is embodied, and it is one hell of a body

# ? Aug 29, 2019 22:05

Pesky Splinter: Feb 16, 2011; A worried pug.

Jaeluni Asjil posted:

The large lad with Her Maj is David Alastair Morgan-Hewitt. An English hotelier best known as the managing director of the Goring Hotel in London, England. He is the Honorary Catering Advisor to the army and a freeman of the City of London.

I googled so you don't have to.

Am reminded of;

The Fifth Elephant - Pratchett posted:

All Jolson was a man who�d show up on an atlas and change the orbit of smaller planets. Paving stones cracked under his feet. He combined in one body�and there was plenty of room left over�Ankh-Morpork�s best chef and its keenest eater, a circumstance made in mashed potato heaven. Sergeant Colon couldn�t remember what the man�s real first name had been; he�d picked up the nickname by general acclaim, since no one seeing him in the street for the first time could believe that it was all Jolson.

# ? Aug 29, 2019 22:05

Microplastics: Jul 6, 2007; It's what's for dinner.

All I'm taking away from that is Sergeant Colon

# ? Aug 29, 2019 22:06

Failed Imagineer: Sep 22, 2018

JeremoudCorbynejad posted:

All I'm taking away from that is Sergeant Colon

You should be taking away that you need to read Terry Pratchett, and definitely the Watch books

# ? Aug 29, 2019 22:07

OwlFancier: Aug 22, 2013

There are a surprisingly low number of jokes about the fact of sergeant colon.

# ? Aug 29, 2019 22:08

xtothez: Jan 4, 2004; College Slice

Jedit posted:

They don't give a gently caress about the people, but this isn't like austerity where it's a bunch of paup strangers whose deaths can be written off as removing a burden on the system because they're strangers to you. Pretty much everyone in the country personally knows someone who might die as a result of this.

You're thinking too close to reality. In Tory Brexit Fantasy Land any problems will be the fault of the remoaners who dragged this out for too long, the minorities wot did all the riots and looting on TV, and the perfidious EU who withheld all our medicine shipments to punish us.

The one person absolutely free of any blame will be the Brexit voter or their representative.

# ? Aug 29, 2019 22:09

Julio Cruz: May 19, 2006

OwlFancier posted:

There are a surprisingly low number of jokes about the fact of sergeant colon.

"sounds like surgery"

# ? Aug 29, 2019 22:10

Guavanaut: Nov 27, 2009; Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998; Toilet Rascal

OwlFancier posted:

There are a surprisingly low number of jokes about the fact of sergeant colon.

Although quite a few about how he looks like a composite of qt_gammons.jpg

# ? Aug 29, 2019 22:10

OwlFancier: Aug 22, 2013

Julio Cruz posted:

"sounds like surgery"

Oh yes there are a couple but for a man named after anatomy and grammar I expected a lot more.

# ? Aug 29, 2019 22:12

baka kaba: Jul 19, 2003; PLEASE ASK ME, THE SELF-PROFESSED NO #1 PAUL CATTERMOLE FAN IN THE SOMETHING AWFUL S-CLUB 7 MEGATHREAD, TO NAME A SINGLE SONG BY HIS EXCELLENT NU-METAL SIDE PROJECT, SKUA, AND IF I CAN'T PLEASE TELL ME TO
EAT SHIT

Vlex posted:

Sunless Skies is good but the prose doesn't have quite the same shade of purple as Seas, since Kennedy isn't with Failbetter any more for ~~shagging his employees~~ meeting his life partner and going on to create top-notch deckbuilder Cultist Simulator, which is worth winning at least once.

also in video shames news this dude has been called out as an abusive predator by a bunch of women who've worked with him

https://twitter.com/betterthemask/status/1166757334103842816

https://twitter.com/emshort/status/1166808519074570240

# ? Aug 29, 2019 22:14

Ursine Catastrophe: Nov 9, 2009; It's a lovely morning in the void and you are a horrible lady-in-waiting.

don't ask how i know; Dinosaur Gum

Guavanaut posted:

Although quite a few about how he looks like a composite of qt_gammons.jpg

He�s effectively literally a gammon with the exception of the oddly unrealistic character trait of �capable of learning better�, if I�m remembering Jingo correctly

# ? Aug 29, 2019 22:15

WhatEvil: Jun 6, 2004; Can't get no luck.

Jaeluni Asjil posted:

The large lad with Her Maj is David Alastair Morgan-Hewitt. An English hotelier best known as the managing director of the Goring Hotel in London, England. He is the Honorary Catering Advisor to the army and a freeman of the City of London.

I googled so you don't have to.

You can't fool me, that's clearly The Kingpin.

Only registered members can see post attachments!

# ? Aug 29, 2019 22:16

Pesky Splinter: Feb 16, 2011; A worried pug.

JeremoudCorbynejad posted:

All I'm taking away from that is Sergeant Colon

Failed Imagineer has the right idea.

Failed Imagineer posted:

You should be taking away that you need to read Terry Pratchett, and definitely the Watch books

For example;

Men At Arms posted:

The reason that the rich were so rich, Vimes reasoned, was because they managed to spend less money.

Take boots, for example. He earned thirty-eight dollars a month plus allowances. A really good pair of leather boots cost fifty dollars. But an affordable pair of boots, which were sort of OK for a season or two and then leaked like hell when the cardboard gave out, cost about ten dollars. Those were the kind of boots Vimes always bought, and wore until the soles were so thin that he could tell where he was in Ankh-Morpork on a foggy night by the feel of the cobbles.

But the thing was that good boots lasted for years and years. A man who could afford fifty dollars had a pair of boots that'd still be keeping his feet dry in ten years' time, while the poor man who could only afford cheap boots would have spent a hundred dollars on boots in the same time and would still have wet feet.

This was the Captain Samuel Vimes 'Boots' theory of socioeconomic unfairness.

And

Night Watch posted:

The city beyond was dark again, with only the occasional chink of light from a shuttered window. By comparison, the streets of the Republic were ablaze.

In a few hours, the shops out there were expecting deliveries, and they weren�t going to arrive. A city like Ankh-Morpork was only two meals away from chaos at the best of times.

Every day maybe a hundred cows died for Ankh-Morpork. So did a flock of sheep and a herd of pigs, and the gods alone knew how many ducks, chickens, and geese. Flour? He�d heard it was eighty tons, and about the same amount of potatoes, and maybe twenty tons of herring. He didn�t particularly want to know this kind of thing, but once you started having to sort out the everlasting traffic problem, these were the kind of facts that got handed to you.

Every day, forty thousand eggs were laid for the city. Every day, hundreds, thousands of carts and boats and barges converged on the city with fish and honey and oysters and olives and eels and lobsters. And then think of the horses dragging this stuff, and the windmills � and the wool coming in, too, every day, the cloth, the tobacco, the spices, the ore, the timber, the cheese, the coal, the fat, the tallow, the hay EVERY drat DAY �

Against the dark screen of night, Vimes had a vision of Ankh-Morpork. It wasn�t a city, it was a process, a weight on the world that distorted the land for hundreds of miles around. People who�d never see it in their whole life nevertheless spent that life working for it. Thousands and thousands of green acres were part of it, forests were part of it. It drew in and consumed...

...and gave back the dung from its pens, and the soot from its chimneys, and steel, and saucepans, and all the tools by which food was made. And also clothes, and fashions, and ideas, and interesting vices, songs, and knowledge, and something which, if looked at in the right light, was called civilization. That was what civilization meant. It meant the city.

A lot of the stuff came in through the Onion Gate and the Shambling Gate, both now Republican and solidly locked. There�d be a military picket on them, surely. Right now, there were carts on the way that�d find those gates closed to them. Yet, no matter what the politics, eggs hatch, and milk sours, and herds of driven animals need penning and watering, and where was all that going to happen? Would the military sort it out? Well, would they? While the carts rumbled up, and then were hemmed in by the carts behind, and the pigs escaped, and the cattle herds wandered off?

Was anyone important thinking about this?

Also Night Watch - it's really loving good posted:

Vimes had spent his life on the streets, and had met decent men and fools and people who'd steal a penny from a blind beggar and people who performed silent miracles or desperate crimes every day behind the grubby windows of little houses, but he'd never met "The People".

People on the side of "The People" always ended up disappointed, in any case. They found that The People tended not to be grateful or appreciative or forward-thinking or obedient. The People tended to be small-minded and conservative and not very clever and were even distrustful of cleverness. And so the children of the revolution were faced with the age-old problem: it wasn't that you had the wrong kind of government, which was obvious, but that you had the wrong kind of people.

As soon as you saw people as things to be measured, they didn't measure up. What would run through the streets soon enough wouldn't be a revolution or a riot. It'd be people who were frightened and panicking. It was what happened when the machinery of city life faltered, the wheels stopped turning and all the little rules broke down. And when that happened, humans were worse than sheep. Sheep just ran; they didn't try to bite the sheep next to them.�

Hogfather posted:

�All right," said Susan. "I'm not stupid. You're saying humans need... fantasies to make life bearable."

REALLY? AS IF IT WAS SOME KIND OF PINK PILL? NO. HUMANS NEED FANTASY TO BE HUMAN. TO BE THE PLACE WHERE THE FALLING ANGEL MEETS THE RISING APE.

"Tooth fairies? Hogfathers? Little�"

YES. AS PRACTICE. YOU HAVE TO START OUT LEARNING TO BELIEVE THE LITTLE LIES.

"So we can believe the big ones?"

YES. JUSTICE. MERCY. DUTY. THAT SORT OF THING.

"They're not the same at all!"

YOU THINK SO? THEN TAKE THE UNIVERSE AND GRIND IT DOWN TO THE FINEST POWDER AND SIEVE IT THROUGH THE FINEST SIEVE AND THEN SHOW ME ONE ATOM OF JUSTICE, ONE MOLECULE OF MERCY. AND YET �Death waved a hand. AND YET YOU ACT AS IF THERE IS SOME IDEAL ORDER IN THE WORLD, AS IF THERE IS SOME...SOME RIGHTNESS IN THE UNIVERSE BY WHICH IT MAY BE JUDGED.

"Yes, but people have got to believe that, or what's the point�"

MY POINT EXACTLY.�

Pesky Splinter fucked around with this message at 22:21 on Aug 29, 2019

# ? Aug 29, 2019 22:18

OwlFancier: Aug 22, 2013

Ursine Catastrophe posted:

He�s effectively literally a gammon with the exception of the oddly unrealistic character trait of �capable of learning better�, if I�m remembering Jingo correctly

Yeah that's sort of his characterisation, though he's also very humanised, he's cowardly and stupid but you can't help but kind of like him, because you can see why he's like that, and oftentimes it doens't really come up because his life is structured such that he doesn't ever need to be otherwise. You could probably write a very good structuralist critique based on the character.

# ? Aug 29, 2019 22:18

OwlFancier: Aug 22, 2013

Pesky Splinter posted:

And

Can't believe terry pratchett predicted brexit lol.

# ? Aug 29, 2019 22:22

Junior G-man: Sep 15, 2004; Wrapped in a mystery, inside an enigma

Was this posted? Because gently caress You Daniel Hannan.

https://twitter.com/DanielJHannan/status/1166850898179624967?s=19

This fucker was just like Farage in Brussels. He didn't do gently caress all for his constituents there either. The amount of times I've seen this fucker just hanging out and drinking beer in the pubs near the Parliament.

# ? Aug 29, 2019 22:24

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# ? May 27, 2024 13:59

feedmegin: Jul 30, 2008

Junior G-man posted:

Hereditary monarchies do not, unfortunately, play by Highlander rules.

I mean they kinda do actually, just ask Henry VII.

# ? Aug 29, 2019 22:24

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Debate & Discussion > UKMT August 2019 - we (UK) should simply invade Ireland peacefully

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