Weird Shit For Sale: It's My Pleasure to offer you My Services

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System Metternich: Feb 28, 2010; But what did he mean by that?

# ? Jul 11, 2019 16:15

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? Jun 6, 2024 14:20

Scathach: Apr 4, 2011; You know that thing where you sleep on your arm funny and when you wake up it's all numb? Yeah that's my whole world right now.

Jokes on him, there's like a 50% chance any Mc is going to be Scottish.

# ? Jul 11, 2019 16:31

Push El Burrito: May 9, 2006; Soiled Meat

System Metternich posted:

Joe Pesci lying about his age.

# ? Jul 11, 2019 16:39

Read Snigfut: Feb 19, 2013; Mostly harmless.

# ? Aug 29, 2019 01:02

Scathach: Apr 4, 2011; You know that thing where you sleep on your arm funny and when you wake up it's all numb? Yeah that's my whole world right now.

Well that's just loving odd

# ? Aug 29, 2019 01:14

Push El Burrito: May 9, 2006; Soiled Meat

Read Snigfut posted:

Only for Jim.

# ? Aug 29, 2019 01:43

Cool Dad: Jun 15, 2007; It is always Friday night, motherfuckers

Gonna go pick up my A REAL TESTE sign.

# ? Aug 29, 2019 02:32

Screaming Idiot: Nov 26, 2007; JUST POSTING WHILE JERKIN' MY GHERKIN SITTIN' IN A PERKINS!

BEATS SELLING MERKINS.

Read Snigfut posted:

# ? Aug 29, 2019 03:01

Leon Sumbitches: Mar 27, 2010; Dr. Leon Adoso Sumbitches (prounounced soom-'beh-cheh) (born January 21, 1935) is heir to the legendary Adoso family oil fortune.

Enola Gay-For-Pay posted:

Gonna go pick up my A REAL TESTE sign.

I'm gonna get my TEASE ALERT sign, finally

# ? Aug 29, 2019 03:02

gey muckle mowser: Aug 5, 2003; Do you know anything about...
witches?; Buglord

Enola Gay-For-Pay posted:

Gonna go pick up my A REAL TESTE sign.

same but TEAT LEASER

# ? Aug 29, 2019 14:09

venus de lmao: Apr 30, 2007; Call me "pixeltits"

gey muckle mowser posted:

same but TEAT LEASER

TEAT RESALE

# ? Aug 29, 2019 14:14

jojoinnit: Dec 13, 2010; Strength and speed, that's why you're a special agent.

# ? Aug 30, 2019 02:05

Johnny Aztec: Jan 30, 2005; by Hand Knit

*He also has a massive cock

# ? Aug 30, 2019 02:16

venus de lmao: Apr 30, 2007; Call me "pixeltits"

"sweat gledding" sounds like a weird fetish

# ? Aug 30, 2019 03:12

venus de lmao: Apr 30, 2007; Call me "pixeltits"

That looks like genuine illiteracy

# ? Aug 30, 2019 03:13

ashnjack: Jun 8, 2010; FUCK FLOWERS. JUST...FUCK 'EM.

I am baffled by the fact that somebody was both knowledgeable enough to use a computer as well as literate enough to use actual words, and yet still ended up with this monstrosity. This goes beyond illiteracy into anti-literacy

# ? Aug 30, 2019 05:14

monolithburger: Sep 7, 2011

ashnjack posted:

I am baffled by the fact that somebody was both knowledgeable enough to use a computer as well as literate enough to use actual words, and yet still ended up with this monstrosity. This goes beyond illiteracy into anti-literacy

Yeah but horse people.

# ? Aug 30, 2019 05:33

Antivehicular: Dec 30, 2011; I wanna sing one for the cars
That are right now headed silent down the highway
And it's dark and there is nobody driving And something has got to give

ashnjack posted:

I am baffled by the fact that somebody was both knowledgeable enough to use a computer as well as literate enough to use actual words, and yet still ended up with this monstrosity. This goes beyond illiteracy into anti-literacy

I'm gonna guess there's a lot of autocorrect going on. Misspellings of "gentle" being autocorrected to "genital" is a classic.

# ? Aug 30, 2019 06:10

ReidRansom: Oct 25, 2004

monolithburger posted:

Yeah but horse people.

Horse people also usually know all the specialized names for coat colors. This person knows 15.5 hand gelding but then opts for "yellowish color" instead of yellow dun or strawberry roan or palomino or whatever? I'm suspicious.

Antivehicular posted:

I'm gonna guess there's a lot of autocorrect going on. Misspellings of "gentle" being autocorrected to "genital" is a classic.

Perhaps, but nothing in the history of anywhere has ever autocorrected to "genitalness"

# ? Aug 30, 2019 11:07

Hirayuki: Mar 28, 2010

ReidRansom posted:

Perhaps, but nothing in the history of anywhere has ever autocorrected to "genitalness"

He or she typed that out manually, based on the presumed correct spelling "genital" previously provided by auto-correct.

# ? Aug 30, 2019 12:12

Carthag Tuek: Oct 15, 2005; Tider skal komme,
tider skal henrulle,
sl�gt skal f�lge sl�gters gang

i thought the horse was genial but probably gentle is more likely

# ? Aug 30, 2019 14:38

AlbieQuirky: Oct 9, 2012; Just me and my 🌊dragon🐉 hanging out

It�s bullshit. �Gledding� tips it off. Autocorrect knows that�s supposed to be �gelding�, and even without autocorrect, someone misspelling it wouldn�t add an extra d out of nowhere.

# ? Aug 30, 2019 17:00

Carthag Tuek: Oct 15, 2005; Tider skal komme,
tider skal henrulle,
sl�gt skal f�lge sl�gters gang

AlbieQuirky posted:

It�s bullshit. �Gledding� tips it off. Autocorrect knows that�s supposed to be �gelding�, and even without autocorrect, someone misspelling it wouldn�t add an extra d out of nowhere.

you clearly dont know any dyslexics

# ? Aug 30, 2019 19:02

Solice Kirsk: Jun 1, 2004; .

Krankenstyle posted:

you clearly dont know any dyslexics

Probably what the extra D stands for.

# ? Aug 30, 2019 19:43

uli2000: Feb 23, 2015

Solice Kirsk posted:

Probably what the extra D stands for.

The extra D is for a double dose of his huge horse cock.

# ? Sep 1, 2019 03:40

venus de lmao: Apr 30, 2007; Call me "pixeltits"

AlbieQuirky posted:

It’s bullshit. “Gledding” tips it off. Autocorrect knows that’s supposed to be “gelding”, and even without autocorrect, someone misspelling it wouldn’t add an extra d out of nowhere.

If this was posted from a device with autocorrect, you'd see a lot more correctly spelled but wrong words.

The reason it's probably not dyslexia is that there's no substitution of similar shaped letters (e.g. b/d, m/n, etc.) and the reason it's probably, on second thought, not genuine illiteracy is that the errors are far too consistent for someone who doesn't understand the written language. Plus the obvious double entendres are a little too on the nose.

So you're probably right, but you never know, I've seen some really weird stuff.

# ? Sep 1, 2019 12:16

cash crab: Apr 5, 2015; all the time i am eating from the trashcan. the name of this trashcan is ideology

i literally cannot pick which of those sentences are better, but it might be "come try are boy"

# ? Sep 1, 2019 16:04

Ghost Leviathan: Mar 2, 2017; Exploration is ill-advised.

The internet, where everything is too weird to be fake or too fake to be weird.

# ? Sep 1, 2019 16:14

sweeperbravo: May 18, 2012; AUNT GWEN'S COLD SHAPE (!)

cash crab posted:

i literally cannot pick which of those sentences are better, but it might be "come try are boy"

The first sentence has the delightful twang of a poorly translated spambot post

# ? Sep 1, 2019 16:24

jojoinnit: Dec 13, 2010; Strength and speed, that's why you're a special agent.

I find it works better if you mentally read it in a Scottish accent (Glaswegian works for me) but the fact that the price is in dollars throws that off.

# ? Sep 1, 2019 18:17

DemonDarkhorse: Nov 5, 2011; It's probably not tobacco. You just need to start wiping front-to-back from now on.

# ? Sep 1, 2019 18:30

Snowy: Oct 6, 2010; A man whose blood
Is very snow-broth;
One who never feels
The wanton stings and
Motions of the sense

That picture is pretty funny but beekeepers do love showing up for free bees.

# ? Sep 1, 2019 18:43

Push El Burrito: May 9, 2006; Soiled Meat

Snowy posted:

That picture is pretty funny but beekeepers do love showing up for free bees.

We all love free bees.

# ? Sep 2, 2019 02:47

Leon Sumbitches: Mar 27, 2010; Dr. Leon Adoso Sumbitches (prounounced soom-'beh-cheh) (born January 21, 1935) is heir to the legendary Adoso family oil fortune.