Dienes posted:

I [27M] talk in my sleep and my wife [25F] thinks I'm having an affair

My wife and I are married for 6 years.

Hobo Clown posted:

Hellblazer187 posted:

Update on the grounded adult.


I will take steps to be a better boy.

Hellblazer187 posted:

Update on the grounded adult.


I will take steps to be a better boy.

Hellblazer187 posted:

I don't think anyone at all has said that. I think some people are saying the gravity of what happened to him is much worse than a single slap to the face, and that the single slap doesn't remove all sympathy from him. Feel free to criticize anyone who actually said the thing you're pretending I said, though.

DemoneeHo posted:

Six Brown Chicks have six really good questions this week. I'm particularly fond of 1 and 2.

https://twitter.com/SixBrownChicks/status/1169291418269114373

Chairman Mao posted:

Yeah sorry I can’t muster an ounce of sympathy for the serial cheater who got slapped.

luxury handset posted:

extreme lmao that nobody in this guy's church is willing to get involved. he's gonna get tased every sunday

extremely online posted:

You don't get to hit people just because you're mad at them.

Rubellavator posted:

It was self defense against his emotional abuser.

Rubellavator posted:

It was self defense against his emotional abuser.

Rubellavator posted:

It was self defense against his emotional abuser.

Chairman Mao posted:

Yeah sorry I can’t muster an ounce of sympathy for the serial cheater who got slapped.

goethe.cx posted:

I was with you until this nuclear take

welcome to hell posted:

My husband [31M] very much wants to be a sperm donor and it makes me [28F] uncomfortable

quote:

He's generous, loving and prone to spoiling me for the most part, supportive and affectionate. He's also very quiet and reserved, borderline aloof, and has a somewhat submissive personality. Not that I'm domineering, I just tend to take charge on most things because he either wants that or lets me. He is also very, very insecure and thrives off of validation, mostly from me. Every few months we have this little song and dance that stems from something he's feeling jealous/under-confident/sad over.

Last month it was the fact that I had more partners than he did before we got together (we've been together for almost a decade now, most of these partners were when I was a teenager). He admitted that his issue wasn't just with me having partners, but that I got to discover myself and 'get it out of my system' before settling down, something he never got to do because I was his second serious partner ever, and that he lost his virginity in his 20s.

Before that, he broke down to tears over the course of a few weeks because he believed I wasn't attracted to him. Like, at all. I realized I wasn't properly communicating in his love language and started vocally complimenting him. He accused me of trying to blow smoke up his rear end and 'win his favor'. This is also tied to his long-term insecurity over my bisexuality, as he feels he can never be 'what I really want'... since I dated a couple of women in the past.

Then he got upset because I played games for too long with my best friend, and nearly demanded that I dropped them. A friend that he knows and trusts well... That I hung out with when my husband was face-deep in his hobby and didn't want to be bothered.

TMI incoming: He sucks in bed. I finally got fed-up enough to tell him so, and after dealing with his emotional tantrum he begged me to teach him how to be better. However, I couldn't, since every time I tried to educate him on how I worked he'd assume I'd learned it from when I was with someone else, and got physically ill or sad. He wouldn't let me incorporate toys into our play either, even vibes, since they made him jealous. He admitted to me sometime later that he fantasized about throwing all of my toys away, or at least hiding them so I could get 're-sensitized'. He got over himself after a while, but then it came rushing back recently. As of now we barely have sex, as he claims he feels too unattractive, and cannot stop thinking about the fun I had when I was with partners before I even knew he existed.

Speaking of that hobby, he also shed tears over feeling embarrassed by it (even though it's a very all-ages hobby) and admitted to envying how carefree I am with the things that make me happy (writing and art). He wanted some time to himself and his craft, but apparently does not want me to spend the time I leave him to be with others.

Then! He became depressed because he felt he wasn't providing for me as much as other guys provided for their partners, only to get even madder when friends of mine or fans of my work would buy me things or donate money. Then he got mad because he didn't have friends to buy him things, and admitted to being jealous of the attention.

Then... this summer, he was upset that he wasn't tan enough to be considered attractive and that his 'pale, sunless' body (I never cared about his skin color) disgusted me. He then started skipping and denying sunscreen, knowing I'm a major advocate for wearing sunscreen all year round because no sun-kissed glow is worth a melanoma.

Last week he begged me, sobbing, asking what he could do to be more attractive to me again, and then went out and bought an expensive annual gym membership with hopes to bulk up and become this imaginary ideal he thinks I'm lusting after.

These are just a few situations. Otherwise he's great.

Hellblazer187 posted:

Update on the grounded adult.


I will take steps to be a better boy.

Dunning Krugerrand posted:

You gotta read this long rear end lede she buried in the comments.


Otherwise he's great!

Lucrece posted:

AITA for saying to my friend who used to be into me that I "wish I could find a guy like him"?

Dienes posted:

I guess I don't see a difference between that and your statement that boiled down to "You can't criticize a man for hitting his fiancee out of anger unless you are literally perfect."

Dienes posted:

You can sympathize with someone for hitting a cheater, but not with the person who killed one?

Dunning Krugerrand posted:

You gotta read this long rear end lede she buried in the comments.


Otherwise he's great!

DemoneeHo posted:

Care and Feeding - My Friend Equates Her Stepmom Experience With My Natural Motherhood and It Drives Me Crazy

Hellblazer187 posted:

My statement does not say that at all. Feel very free to criticize the man for slapping her. Nearly every person in the thread has done so. I will do so right now.

He was wrong to slap her. Slapping her was lovely. He is a lovely person for having slapped her.

What I am saying is that there are degrees of lovely things, and doing a lovely thing doesn't mean you deserve any and all other, considerably shittier things to happen to you. I have sympathy for the lovely fiance slapper, because despite being lovely, he had a rain of poo poo fall on him that I wouldn't wish on anyone.

Also, please remember that all of us have done lovely things in our lives as well and we would be good to remember that.

It's not as though every story has exactly one bad guy, for whom we can never muster sympathy lest it render us impure, and exactly one good guy, who we must clap and cheer for. We don't even need to rank who is worse or better. But we can say "Wow, it's really hosed up that a guy got cheated on and lied to and gaslighted and then blamed for the suicide of his emotional abuser, by his own mother no less. That would be an extremely hosed up thing to experience" and at the exact same time say "slapping your partner is completely unacceptable and never deserved."

quote:

I [20F] have talked to him [21M] for 6 months and he's always been super respectful and sweet, but him suggesting that I should sleep over the first time we meet seems a bit strange to me so I just wanted to get a second opinon!

We have finally decided to meet up this sunday, it took a while because I've been traveling, and also because he lives 2 hours away. I'm arriving there around 12, so basically lunchtime, and he texted me asked if I'm going to sleep over. I wasn't planning on sleeping there since that would mean that we'd have to hang out for like 12h+ on our first date. It just seems like a lot.

I really don't want to sleep with him on the first date and I hope that's not what he's hoping for. I've recently had a bad experience when I slept with a guy early on, and I just want to take it a bit slow for once (not extremely slow though, I'd just rather not gently caress him on the 1st date).

What would you think/feel in this situation? Is he just being polite because I live quite far away or is he planning on getting in my pants? Maybe both?

quote:

So about 4 out of 5 days, this beautiful brunette gets on the bus to head into the small city I work in. Today is looks hot in the skirt she has one, nice legs, but not being too superfluous over looks, I have yet to talk to her, mainly because I noticed the dreaded engagement ring..

I could test the waters, but if girl has a ring on, then she is more than happy with the guy she has.

Not a good place to post this, but needed to get it off my chest.

quote:

I [22F] never had any pets growing up, but now I’m seeing a dude [22M] with a dog. I really like the dog so far, but I’ve also never dated anyone with a pet. Should I offer to take the dog on walks? Buy the dog treats/toys? How much attention (petting, playing, belly rubbing) should I give the dog? What happens if I end up liking the dog more than the dude? Help!

Hellblazer187 posted:

Update on the grounded adult.


I will take steps to be a better boy.

BONGHITZ posted:

hmm there is a post up with the n word in it, ill just link it for you: https://old.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/czm1ex/aita_for_taking_my_daughter_off_life_support/

e: its a stupid post

quote:

To begin this post, I met my boyfriend on tinder and we have been dating for six months. We’re both in college and I’m a finance major and he’s a poly-sci major. He is a major bookworm and loves reading about history. He also likes sharing his wealth of knowledge. Sometimes, the content is very disturbing to me. For example, he thinks being anything non-cis is disgusting (trans, gay, drag), that the newly freed slaves should have been sent back to Africa, thinks interracial couples are gross, and is also an antisemite. We grew up in very different situations, me in diverse very non-violent schools in a metropolitan area and him in a rural area with high racial tensions. He’s also had bad experiences in his youth with people who were gay and other races, so sometimes I see how he was lead down this path. The thing that hurts me the most though is that he brushes off all of my core beliefs about treating people with respect and equality of all classes, creeds, and sexual orientations as “mothering” and that “I just care about other people outside of my group because I’m a woman”. Most of the time he is loving and caring to me but I don’t know what to do about all of his political views. Debating with him is exhausting and has ended in me crying numerous times. Please help me, I’m not sure what to do.

quote:

Context first;

I have recently been playing on a GTA RP server that a mutual friend(we’ll call him joe) brought me and my friend(we’ll call her Tina) to. The rules of this server are simple;

No fail RP, no cop baiting, be respectful to the staff, don’t send money between your characters, don’t send items between your characters, and you must have a mic to play.

Now here’s the situation, Tina has three characters in this server. One character(e)has a job that makes a lot of money, she gives this money to her husband(who also plays) who then gives it to another one of her characters(p)which owns a company. The third character(m) is able to get weaponry like guns and she also gives this to a different person to give to p. I have evidence of this but it’s a small amount. The other thing Tina does is cop bait on her p character. She’ll shoot her gun, do robberies then cancel them just to get the cops to her location. One time she even went so far as to kidnap a cop(a no go unless you have permission) and take him for a joyride. The next thing is how much FailRP I’ve seen her do. I have a lot of it recorded and am just getting it all together to report it.

Now here’s where a big dilemma comes in. I know Tina personally. As in we are friends irl. I feel like getting her banned would be a betrayal to her. But I also want the integrity of the server and role play to be the best it can be.

So reddit, WIBTA if I made a push to get my friend banned?

Hellblazer187 posted:

"it's just politics!"

Hobo Clown posted:

WIBTA if I pushed to get a friend of mine banned from a GTA roleplay server?

cumshitter posted:

I'm wondering what bad experiences he had with gay people and people of other races in his "high racial tension rural area" where people definitely owned slaves at some point.

Like he would shout slurs at people in his car and sometimes they would have the gall to throw rocks back at him?

Chairman Mao posted:

This line is never not used to excuse someone being a total and complete piece of poo poo.

Grape posted:

And in this kind of context reveals the person saying it is also garbage.

cumshitter posted:

Like he would shout slurs at people in his car and sometimes they would have the gall to throw rocks back at him?