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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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May 12, 2024 19:53
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- AceOfFlames
- Oct 9, 2012
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Be American and Follow the loud, stupid, moron.
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Aug 29, 2019 19:10
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- PumpkinBat
- Oct 22, 2012
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Be American and Follow the loud, stupid, moron.
Be a loud, stupid moron and Follow the American.
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Aug 30, 2019 16:20
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- Rebonack7
- Aug 27, 2015
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As Americans, it's our patriotic duty to go wherever the hell we want whenever we want, and we want to go to the top of that erupting volcano right now!
quote:
“Come on, Gina,” you say hurriedly. “Follow that guy!” You start up the mountain.
“But the volcano!” Gina gasps, scrambling after you.
“Hooahtoo said we’re in danger as long as we have the stone piece,” you remind Gina. “He also told us we have to go to the volcano to get rid of it. The volcano erupting may be the danger he was talking about.”
“Just throw it away!” Gina pleads. She stops climbing. “Let someone else find it and put it back. Besides, you’re at the foot of the volcano. Maybe this is close enough!”
Gina’s face is red, and she’s almost shouting.
You don’t want her to be mad at you. And maybe she’s right. The volcano could be dangerous.
But if you throw the stone away down here, will the curse go away with it?
Or will the curse be worse because you didn’t follow Hooahtoo’s instructions?
Maybe you should pretend to throw the stone away. Later, when Gina is calmer, you can continue your mission.
If you throw the stone piece up the mountain, turn to PAGE 124.
If you pretend to throw it away to calm Gina, turn to PAGE 24.
Character Sheet posted:
Inventory
Tiki Eye
Goal Endings: 2/5
Bad Endings
Mistook the mouth of a giant man-eating sea monster for a tunnel and ran inside.
Buried alive by an avalanche of pink diamonds.
Transformed into a skeleton pirate by the light of the pink crystals.
Skeletonized by a school of piranha in the brig.
Transformed into an octopus after biting one.
Forced to kick people by a cursed rock stuck to our foot.
Achievements
None yet.
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Aug 30, 2019 16:53
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- chitoryu12
- Apr 24, 2014
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Aug 30, 2019 17:13
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- AceOfFlames
- Oct 9, 2012
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Aug 30, 2019 18:20
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- Amidiri
- Apr 26, 2010
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Cast it into the fire! Destroy it!
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Aug 31, 2019 02:20
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- Rebonack7
- Aug 27, 2015
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Technically, Hooahtoo did say we have to use the Eye to repair the Tiki Mask, but I'm sure if we just leave it on this erupting volcano, the curse will sort itself out.
quote:
You decide Gina is right. You’ll throw the Tiki Eye up the mountain and forget about it.
You hurl the broken stone piece as hard as you can. As soon as the eye leaves your hand, the rumbling of the volcano grows louder. The earth beneath your feet shakes violently.
“She’s gonna blow!” the loudmouthed tourist yells. He grabs a tree and holds on.
“It’s the curse!” you cry. “I shouldn’t have thrown away the eye. I have to get it back!”
You scramble across the trembling ground. Gina follows you up the mountain. You frantically search the area where the stone piece might have landed.
The whole mountain shakes. The loudmouthed guy stumbles and falls. He tumbles past you and Gina. The tour guide tries to grab him. But he knocks her over, dragging her along with him.
“Gina!” you cry. “Hold on to me!” But before Gina can grab you, the top of the mountain explodes! Hot lava spills down the side of the mountain.
You and Gina are right in the path of the fiery liquid.
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A red-hot wave of flowing lava washes over you and Gina.
“AAAHHHHHhhhh!” you and Gina scream together.
Until your mouths fill up with molten rock.
You’re sucked under the thick, swirling, scalding sludge.
Oh, well. You got swept away by this tropical adventure. But you tried your best. And at least you had a lava-ly time – until you met this red-hot
END.
Character Sheet posted:
Inventory
Tiki Eye
Goal Endings: 2/5
Bad Endings
Mistook the mouth of a giant man-eating sea monster for a tunnel and ran inside.
Buried alive by an avalanche of pink diamonds.
Transformed into a skeleton pirate by the light of the pink crystals.
Skeletonized by a school of piranha in the brig.
Transformed into an octopus after biting one.
Forced to kick people by a cursed rock stuck to our foot.
 Drowned/burned to death in an eruption of molten lava.
Achievements
None yet.
Our options posted:
- See Dr. Oates about the stone piece.
- Ignore the guide and keep going.
- Wait and see what the tour guide does.
- Pretend to throw the Tiki Eye up the volcano.
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Sep 2, 2019 18:50
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- Jadecore
- Mar 10, 2018
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They say money can't buy happiness, but it sure does help.
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We totally threw it, Gina, honest
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Sep 2, 2019 23:44
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- Rebonack7
- Aug 27, 2015
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Hopefully Gina isn't quite dumb enough that her instincts prompt her to go fetch the rock after we "throw" it.
quote:
You decide you’d better pretend to get rid of the stone. Before Gina has a fit!
“Okay, Gina,” you agree. “I’ll chuck this thing.” You reach into your pocket and pretend to pull out the piece of stone. You act as if you’re throwing as hard as you can.
“Wow!” Gina exclaims. “Awesome pitch! I can’t even see where it went. Now let’s get out of here!” Then she turns and races down the mountain path.
You suddenly feel bad about lying to your cousin. And afraid of what might happen if you don’t follow Hooahtoo’s directions.
“Gina, wait!” you call. “I didn’t really –“
You dash after her. You need to convince her to go up to the mouth of the volcano to break the curse.
“Gina!” you call again. She darts around a curve in the path.
When you round the corner, Gina is nowhere in sight.
She’s vanished!
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“Gina?” you yell. “Where are you?”
No answer.
You peer up and down the path. It’s empty.
“Come on, Gina,” you holler. “Quit kidding around!”
Now you’re getting annoyed. “Gina!” you shout. “Why won’t you answer me?”
It would serve her right if you just left. Or played a trick on her!
On the other hand, Kala did say people disappear. Maybe you should search for her.
If you decide to teach Gina a lesson, turn to PAGE 129.
If you do a thorough search, turn to PAGE 78.
Character Sheet posted:
Inventory
Tiki Eye
Goal Endings: 2/5
Bad Endings
Mistook the mouth of a giant man-eating sea monster for a tunnel and ran inside.
Buried alive by an avalanche of pink diamonds.
Transformed into a skeleton pirate by the light of the pink crystals.
Skeletonized by a school of piranha in the brig.
Transformed into an octopus after biting one.
Forced to kick people by a cursed rock stuck to our foot.
Drowned/burned to death in an eruption of molten lava.
Achievements
None yet.
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Sep 3, 2019 21:16
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- AceOfFlames
- Oct 9, 2012
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Bye, Gina
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Sep 3, 2019 22:36
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- chitoryu12
- Apr 24, 2014
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gently caress Gina
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Sep 4, 2019 00:16
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- Jadecore
- Mar 10, 2018
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They say money can't buy happiness, but it sure does help.
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Gina this is your own dang fault; see you back home
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Sep 5, 2019 13:59
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- Rebonack7
- Aug 27, 2015
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Surprisingly, being a dick is actually the correct option in this case! In fact, it lets us skip almost directly to the ending of this path!
quote:
You call Gina one more time. She doesn’t answer.
“That’s it,” you mutter. You’re going to teach her a lesson. Instead of looking for her anymore, you’re going to hide and pop out when she walks by.
You duck behind a huge boulder jutting out from the side of the mountain. When you lean against the boulder, it moves! As it rolls forward, you lose your balance. The next thing you know, you’re falling into a deep hole.
“Gina-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a!” you cry as you tumble down through darkness.
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The impact makes you dizzy. The walls spin. Your head pounds.
No. It isn’t your head that’s pounding.
It’s the sound of drums!
You sit up slowly and glance around. You’re on a ledge overlooking a huge cavern. Below, a fire blazes in a circle around a golden throne. Your heart skips a beat at the sight of the hundreds of masked warriors surrounding the throne. All of them carry sharp spears.
Gina’s out cold on the floor next to you. “Gina?” you whisper, nudging her. “Gina! Wake up!”
“Huh?” Gina sits up groggily. “Where are we?”
“I’m not sure,” you tell her. The two of you peer down from the ledge. “Whoa,” you mutter. “Check that out!”
Chests full of treasure line the aisle leading to the throne. Golden goblets, coins, rubies, emeralds, and diamonds spill onto the floor.
You hear Gina gasp.
“What is it?” you ask.
“Isn’t he – isn’t he –?” Gina sputters.
“Isn’t he WHO????” you demand.
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Hooahtoo, that’s who!
“What’s he doing here?” you cry.
“And where did all that treasure come from?” Gina adds.
Suddenly, the drums stop beating. Hooahtoo stands. He turns his head in your direction. You and Gina duck away from the edge.
Did he sense your presence? You know he doesn’t need his eyes to see! Your heart pounds so hard, it sounds as if the drums have started up again!
You hear Hooahtoo address the crowd. “I am Hooahtoo!” roars the tiny white-haired man. “When the Tiki Eye has been returned to the sacred Tiki Mask, I shall be supreme ruler of Tiki Island. All the power of the island spirits shall belong to me! Those who are with me shall live. Those who are against me shall be sealed in my underground prison. Forever!*
Oh, no! Hooahtoo told you to trust no one. You never thought that warning included him!
You and Gina crawl back to the edge of the ledge. You have to see what Hooahtoo is doing! You stare down.
Hooahtoo holds up a jeweled and golden Tiki mask.
And it’s missing one eye!
quote:
When the Tiki warriors see the one-eyed mask, they gasp. But before anyone can move, a powerful KABOOM! rocks the cavern. A blast of purple smoke explodes out of one wall.
As the smoke clears, the wall of stone slides open. An underground prison is revealed – filled with people you know!
“There’s Tao, from the snack bar!” you whisper to Gina. “And there’s Angela and Teeko, from the dock. I know them!”
“Are they prisoners?” Gina asks. “What’s going on?”
All the smoke has cleared now. You strain to see who else you know in the crowd of prisoners. Then you draw in a sharp breath. You’re so upset, you forget to whisper. “There’s Kala!” you shout.
Uh-oh.
Hooahtoo may be blind, but his hearing is excellent.
quote:
“Tiki Eye!” Hooahtoo bellows, turning in your direction. “Tiki Eye!”
The warriors stand silent. Only Hooahtoo’s evil-sounding voice echoes through the cavern. “Tiki Eye sees us!” He slowly spits out each word. “We do not see Tiki Eye!”
He gazes around the cavern. His blind white eyes glisten.
He fixes his unblinking stare on the spot where you peer over the edge. Then he speaks his most terrifying words: “Tiki Eye says two must die!”
“He knows we’re up here!” you gasp.
Hooahtoo points a long, bony finger at you and Gina. “Seize them!” he commands. “Bring them to me!”
If you think holding up the Tiki Eye might save you again, turn to PAGE 88.
If you throw a rock at Hooahtoo, turn to PAGE 15.
So, just to go over this one more time, Hooahtoo's master plan to get the Tiki Eye was to refuse it when we offered it to him, send us on a pointless quest that could have easily ended in the Eye getting buried under molten rock or eaten by monsters or something like that, and just kind of hope that we'd show up in his lair so he could take it from us.
Character Sheet posted:
Inventory
Tiki Eye
Goal Endings: 2/5
Bad Endings
Mistook the mouth of a giant man-eating sea monster for a tunnel and ran inside.
Buried alive by an avalanche of pink diamonds.
Transformed into a skeleton pirate by the light of the pink crystals.
Skeletonized by a school of piranha in the brig.
Transformed into an octopus after biting one.
Forced to kick people by a cursed rock stuck to our foot.
Drowned/burned to death in an eruption of molten lava.
Achievements
None yet.
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Sep 5, 2019 15:37
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- AweStriker
- Oct 6, 2014
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Throw a rock! Just,.. not that rock!
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Sep 5, 2019 15:41
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- chitoryu12
- Apr 24, 2014
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Throw a rock at the dumbass
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Sep 5, 2019 17:16
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- AceOfFlames
- Oct 9, 2012
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The only thing that could make this more racist is Hooahtoo turning out to be Johnny Depp in disguise.
Throw a rock.
AceOfFlames fucked around with this message at 19:21 on Sep 5, 2019
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Sep 5, 2019 19:19
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- Rebonack7
- Aug 27, 2015
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HEdg4glpCkg&t=18s
quote:
“We’ll just see about that, Mr. Hooahtoo!” you shout at the tiny bearded Tiki leader. You pick up a rock and aim it right at Hooahtoo’s forehead.
He shields himself with the Tiki mask. The rock bounces off the mask. It smashes down onto a set of remote-control buttons built into the armrest of his throne.
Instantly, another blast of purple smoke pours out of the prison wall.
“The rock!” you gasp. “It activated the controls!”
To the prisoners’ amazement and your surprise, the steel bars of the prison rise up.
Your rock hit the button that opens the bars!
quote:
With a shout, Kala leads the charge of prisoners. As they storm down the aisles, Hooahtoo stands on his throne.
“You will obey the great Hooahtoo!” he shrieks. “I am the supreme leader! I will rule Tiki Island! Obey! Obey! Obey!”
The freed islanders herd the Tiki warriors into the prison. The steel bars crash down.
Next, Kala’s army surrounds Hooahtoo. They hoist him high into the air. Kala grabs a Tiki spear and pins him to the cave wall.
Hanging by his purple robe, the tiny madman can do no more harm.
When it’s all over, Kala glances up to the ledge where you and Gina perch. He waves and smiles just the way he used to. You grin and wave back. You’re glad he’s back to his normal self.
You glance down and see the Tiki Eye lying near your feet. It must have slipped out of your pocket.
You hold it for the last time. It’s warm in your hand.
“Here, Kala!” you call. “Catch!”
quote:
You toss the eye down to Kala. Immediately, he puts it in the eye hole of the sacred Tiki mask.
Kala holds the mask up for all to see. A third blast of purple vapor explodes. When the smoke clears, you discover the warriors have all disappeared into thin air!
“No!” Hooahtoo screams. “My spirit warriors! They’re gone!”
“That’s right, Hooahtoo,” Kala shouts. “You wanted to use the power of the mask for evil. But I chose to use it for good! The curse is lifted. Thanks for your help, my friends.” He smiles up at you. Then he glares at Hooahtoo again. “And now you’ll have to deal with some real people – the police!”
Hooahtoo hangs silently from the spear. You almost feel sorry for the little guy.
Almost.
quote:
Kala presses another button on the throne.
The back wall of the cave rises, and you see the beach. Cheering and whooping, everyone dashes out. You’re all free now.
“Thanks to you and Gina, Tiki Island is safe again,” Kala says as you walk out together.
“Well, I’m glad it’s over,” Gina comments.
“Time to start having a real vacation!” you add.
Kala punches you lightly on the arm. “Now maybe you’ll take me seriously, instead of thinking I’m always kidding around.”
You hang your head sheepishly. “I’m sorry,” you apologize. “I should have –“
Kala cuts you off. “Noooo,” he murmurs. His face pales. “They’re back!” He points a trembling finger at the cave behind you.
“The Tiki warrior spirits?” you gasp. You whirl around.
The cave is empty.
“Gotcha!” Kala laughs so hard, he doubles over. Gina giggles.
You shake your head.
Yup. Everything is back to normal on Tiki Island.
THE END
If you feel like that path was shorter than it should have been, you're right. There's actually a somewhat longer set of choices we're supposed to go through to get to this ending, but following the loudmouth up the volcano lets us jump right to the end. That said, we'll get to see the majority of that sequence either way, since we need to go through it to get to one of the other goal endings as well.
Character Sheet posted:
Inventory
Tiki Eye
Goal Endings: 3/5
Bad Endings
Mistook the mouth of a giant man-eating sea monster for a tunnel and ran inside.
Buried alive by an avalanche of pink diamonds.
Transformed into a skeleton pirate by the light of the pink crystals.
Skeletonized by a school of piranha in the brig.
Transformed into an octopus after biting one.
Forced to kick people by a cursed rock stuck to our foot.
Drowned/burned to death in an eruption of molten lava.
Achievements
Sneaky Tiki: Found the secret back entrance to Hooahtoo's lair.
Our options posted:
- See Dr. Oates about the stone piece.
- Ignore the guide and keep going.
- Wait and see what the tour guide does.
- Do a thorough search for Gina.
- Try to use the Eye against Hooahtoo.
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Sep 6, 2019 14:54
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- Leraika
- Jun 14, 2015
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Luckily, I *did* save your old avatar. Fucked around and found out indeed.
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Can't trust the natives, so let's talk to a real doctor!*
*this book is so racist
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Sep 6, 2019 15:01
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- chitoryu12
- Apr 24, 2014
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Use the eye against him
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Sep 6, 2019 15:11
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- PumpkinBat
- Oct 22, 2012
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So, just to go over this one more time, Hooahtoo's master plan to get the Tiki Eye was to refuse it when we offered it to him, send us on a pointless quest that could have easily ended in the Eye getting buried under molten rock or eaten by monsters or something like that, and just kind of hope that we'd show up in his lair so he could take it from us.
I'm willing to give them the benefit of the doubt, and the Watsonian explanation is that maybe whatever magical rules around the Tiki Eye prevents Hooahtoo from bringing it there directly himself. Like maybe there is a clause that states the eye must be brought there by a child or a person who's not from the island.
Or maybe he was trying to avoid having the curse of the Tiki Eye being on him, better let this stupid kid bear the brunt of it.
Of course, the Doylian explanation is that no one thought this through.
Use the Tiki Eye against him!
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Sep 6, 2019 16:16
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- Jadecore
- Mar 10, 2018
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They say money can't buy happiness, but it sure does help.
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Not unlike an insurance jingle, friend tour guide is on your side
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Sep 8, 2019 17:00
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- Rebonack7
- Aug 27, 2015
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Not unlike an insurance jingle, friend tour guide is on your side
Um, about that...
quote:
The volcano’s rumbling grows louder. You watch the tour guide. Why is everyone running except her? you wonder.
You turn toward Gina. Her face is white with fear. You grab her sleeve as she starts to run. “Wait,” you urge her.
You pull Gina behind a thick clump of bushes. You put a finger to your lips. She nods.
The tour guide pushes aside a shrub. She yanks out a tape recorder and shuts it off. Instantly, the mountain stops rumbling.
“It worked!” she calls. “The volcano recording frightened them away.” She laughs as she tears off her tour guide badge and throws it on the ground.
The loudmouthed guy jogs back down the mountain to join her. “Well done,” he congratulates the fake tour guide. “We must keep all outsiders away from the Tiki altar!”
They reach down into the bushes. Night is falling, so it’s hard to see what they’re doing. You motion Gina to follow you. You creep out from your hiding place for a better look.
A flash of lightning cracks across the sky. In that flash the tour guide and the loudmouthed guy turn to face you. Only now they look very different.
And very terrifying.
quote:
Your eyes widen with horror. You clap your hand over Gina’s mouth to muffle her scream. You bite your tongue to keep from screaming yourself.
The tour guide and loudmouthed guy have transformed. Before you stand two Tiki warriors! They carry gleaming spears. Crowns made of dried bones sit on their heads.
“Look at those masks!” Gina gasps.
“Tiki masks,” you murmur. “I saw masks like those in a ceremony here last year. But that was just for entertainment. I don’t think these two are putting on a show!”
The two masked figures gaze at the flashing sky. They chant words in a language you don’t understand. Their tone is slow and steady. It sounds like some kind of spell.
You’re not sure if they’ve seen you and Gina. There’s a dark hollow underneath a rock next to you. Maybe both of you could fit in there. Should you try to hide? Or should you just stay still?
The lightning flash fades. Darkness saves you.
For now.
But you won’t be safe for long.
If you try to hide, scurry over to PAGE 90.
If you freeze to avoid attracting their attention, go to PAGE 16.
Character Sheet posted:
Inventory
Tiki Eye
Goal Endings: 3/5
Bad Endings
Mistook the mouth of a giant man-eating sea monster for a tunnel and ran inside.
Buried alive by an avalanche of pink diamonds.
Transformed into a skeleton pirate by the light of the pink crystals.
Skeletonized by a school of piranha in the brig.
Transformed into an octopus after biting one.
Forced to kick people by a cursed rock stuck to our foot.
Drowned/burned to death in an eruption of molten lava.
Achievements
Sneaky Tiki: Found the secret back entrance to Hooahtoo's lair.
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Sep 9, 2019 16:15
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- chitoryu12
- Apr 24, 2014
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Freeze! Their vision is based on movement!
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Sep 9, 2019 16:37
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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May 12, 2024 19:53
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Aug 29, 2019 18:42
