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Halloween Jack posted:I thought I hallucinated this. 
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Sep 12, 2019 19:25
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Apparently all the fanflow stuff is archived in a hard drive that is possibly dead. 
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Sep 12, 2019 19:27
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Sep 12, 2019 19:49
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Last time I went on a beach vacation to Norfolk, we stopped in a local roller rink. The place was totally dilapidated--half the lights off, carpet coming up, even places where the insulation was falling through the ceiling. We talked to the owner, who was this nice little 90-year-old man who won the national roller skating championships with his wife in the 70s. (I didn't know this existed, but he had plaques on the wall.) There was a much younger guy, who looked like a perfect stereotype of a Megadeth fan from the 80s, doing an after-school program for little kids. My wife got all misty-eyed and nostalgic for when she went roller skating as a kid, but it was sad to see the place just falling apart.
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Sep 12, 2019 20:00
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The roller rink, she ees…la grande illusion.
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Sep 12, 2019 20:09
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The new iPhone with the three cameras makes me think of that Ray panel " Can't talk right now, I'm three-ballin"
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Sep 12, 2019 21:53
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Scags McDouglas posted:I have the same problem. Way back in the day I subscribed and dutifully read all of the exclusive content, and now it exists only in my fading memory. I would LOVE to see a few of those strips again. I could swear there are still a king's ransom of strips unseen by fans that think they've read all the comics. For Mr. Dick it's the one where Showbiz traded his Commodore PET for Beef's bicycle because it was a "learning computer".
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Sep 12, 2019 23:27
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Mr. Dick posted:For Mr. Dick it's the one where Showbiz traded his Commodore PET for Beef's bicycle because it was a "learning computer". It's completely astounding to me that there wasn't a single person (in anyone's awareness) that saw fit to archive all of those. I could swear there was a TON of content in the subscriber section, but hell if I can list much of it from memory. If I could go back in time 12 years or so to give myself a message, and the only two options were "save Achewood premium locally" or "buy bitcoin" I'd have to really mull it over.
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Sep 12, 2019 23:52
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Couple more from Reddit. There's gotta be more of these somewhere! https://imgur.com/a/s4fXb31
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Sep 12, 2019 23:56
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garfield hentai posted:Couple more from Reddit. There's gotta be more of these somewhere! I want that hug hog shirt
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Sep 13, 2019 04:53
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The stuff I remember was Roast Beef and Molly's honeymoon diary on their mini golf RV tour - that was from fanflow right?
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Sep 13, 2019 05:35
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I've definitely seen the Hug Hog strip, but I was an AssetBar subscriber and "It's Mother Fuckin' Vodka Day" is entirely new to me EDIT: Be careful...on JUDAS PRIEST FRIDAY THE 13TH JethroMcB fucked around with this message at 05:49 on Sep 13, 2019 |
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Sep 13, 2019 05:44
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Oh man I just dug into my 2008 email Achewood Premium Updates #90 Honeymoon Day 13: Grants Pass, OR, 8:45pm. Beef is a wreck. They finally made it into town, only to have his lack of oversize vehicle etiquette once again get them involved in a slow-moving road chase with a taco truck. The truck finally blew a tire and had to pull to the shoulder, but not before the enraged driver, right up alongside Beef, rolled down his window and screamed, <i>"I'm gonna gently caress ju in the culo, cabron!"</i> More or less in hiding at the miniature golf course with the socialist theme, Molly makes do, and makes dinner with some hot dogs and microwave mac-n-cheese. She mixes them a pitcher of dark & stormies and turns on the TV, but Beef makes her watch it on mute. Achewood Premium Updates #91 12:41am. Nice Pete is slicing some good country peppers into vegetable oil with his old age-pocked Bowie. They hiss and sizzle as they fall into his blackened cast iron camp skillet. He is impressed with the heat thrown off by the fuel which burns beneath it tonight, under the fog-muted sky: <i>a baseball which he painstakingly cured with ground charcoal, honest dipetyl-9 secondary bourbon, and sugared sulfur, in the stomach of a cellular telephone store employee who laughed at his innocent questions.</i> Achewood Premium Updates #92 Téodor, feeling a little flush with his catering funds, went into a T-Mobile shop and upgraded himself to an Internet-capable Blackberry. He had tremendous rapport with his saleswoman, a buttocky mamacita with an open sense of humor, and enthusiastically wondered what it would be like to court her. When she referred to ring tones as "ringers," however, his romantic bubble lost all of its prismatic tone and surface texture. Achewood Premium Updates #93 Rod mixed Nice Pete a Skyy sea breeze, which he was bound by honor to accept, though he did ask if he could drink it from a "good, honest coffee mug" instead of the corkscrew-stemmed martini glass. To his horror, Rod happily poured it into a clear glass mug with an inverted rainbow triangle and the word <i>Aruba!</i> emblazoned on the side. Achewood Premium Updates #94 Lyle emptied an old pot of starchy pasta water into Philippe's humidifier, which gave his bedroom walls a uniform, slightly tactile stickiness ideally suited to the display of the little fellow's various diurnal art projects.
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Sep 13, 2019 05:46
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quote:When she referred to ring tones as "ringers," however, his romantic bubble Goddammit Teodor 
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Sep 13, 2019 06:29
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Hey, I've got some of those, too! Achewood Premium Updates #88 <b>Saturday night, 11:30PM.</b> Lyle, pulling into his final cups with whiskey, fantasizes about fighting a German Shepherd, banging its head against a railing as it clamps down on his arm. Philippe, long asleep in bed, dreams of his favorite part of Thanksgiving: seeing his place card there on the table, specially written by hand. Téodor fruitfully searches the Internet for nude photos of Dame Helen Mirren. Ray, across town in the Jack in the Box drive-through, notices that he is behind a white 1989 Honda Accord. He puts on his leather Raiders ball cap and keeps his head low but, despite this, when he pulls up to the speaker two girls on the other end giggle, “He’s gonna gently caress you in the <i>culo!</i>” Unable to place an order, Ray drives home and microwaves some chicken nuggets in a bowl of pizza sauce and Tabasco. Achewood Premium Updates #89 Ray, at Starbucks, browses the web on his new Blackberry and enjoys a High Systolic (today's depth charge: vanilla poppyseed scone - they were out of the good stuff because it's kind of late). He hears a honk and looks out the window: it's the white 1989 Honda Accord. The man isn't looking at him, he's texting. Ray prepares to leave. Suddenly, a chime on his Blackberry; he has a new email. He opens it, only to read, "<i>...in the c u l o .</i>" <!---------------------!> Achewood Premium Updates #95 Preview of the 7/22/2008 wedding reception strip. Achewood Premium Updates #96 Discarded Panel: The enduring yet often misunderstood concept of "asleep style." (img) Achewood Premium Updates #97 Chris got all excited when an advance copy of the new Great Outdoor Fight hardback showed up. He immediately took off his suit, put on a heather gray American Apparel gym shirt and his one pair of jeans, stood by his desk, and turned a little bit while his wife took a photo of him holding it. More photos coming soon from...get this...<i>his new Blackberry.</i> Achewood Premium Updates #98 The book's end papers. Who can ID the inspiration for the overall graphic design? Achewood Premium Updates #99 Ray, walking through the BevMo parking lot after dinner, saw a glint on the asphalt. It was a lost cell phone, and on its screen the voice mail icon flashed. He picked it up, had it retrieve the message, and held the unit to his ear. He recoiled in horror as a man's voice hissed, I'm gonna gently caress ju in the culo til ju scream papi papi! Achewood Premium Updates #100 Strip preview, 7/23: Nice Pete practices presenting his wedding gift to the new couple. Achewood Premium Updates #101 Lyle found himself flush with funds after going on a tear at the Dude & Catastrophe "Trivia Night." The category: Six Degrees of Burt Young. Achewood Premium Updates #102 The old Weber in the back yard rattled and groaned into life. It would feed seven, in the end, and its dying embers would light as many cigarettes. Achewood Premium Updates #103 Lie Bot and Vlad are in a heated discussion about how to pitch “rear end in a top hat-Offset Credits” to Lyle. Once they solve the “but why would an rear end in a top hat care” problem, they plan to roll out nationally. Achewood Premium Updates #104 Strip preview: Will Nice Pete shake the Asti Spumante so hard that the cork shoots out and pops Iorwerth square between the eyes, thwarting his plans for Charley? Achewood Premium Updates #105 Téodor, not wanting to be left out of the party, went out and bought a Blackberry. He immediately sent all his friends this unimportant photograph. Achewood Premium Updates #106 Téodor forgot to attach the blurry photo of his foot to his first Blackberry-based group email, and was immediately reviled by a jury of his peers. Ray texted that he was a "one-man dong," Pat sent him the }:^( emoticon, and Chris forwarded him a picture of a chicken that got hit by a car with the caption "WISH THIS WAS U." In shame, he deleted the photo, so that it would not continue to haunt him. (#107 is an Assetbar update) Achewood Premium Updates #108 Ray's "Ghetto in a Pinch" nacho drizzle sauce: mix five parts Hidden Valley Ranch salad dressing, one part Sriracha chili sauce, and two parts regular old supermarket salsa. Stir with a fork "'Til all blended up pretty good," and use the fork to drizzle and splatter the sauce over "some broiled-up cheese nachos." Upon tasting his dressed nachos, Ray exclaimed, "Daaamn, this poo poo is restaurant!" That's where my email switches over to just assetbar warnings, and everything I have for 73-87 is just a few words.
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Sep 13, 2019 14:00
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Thanks for sharing these! Is the FanFlow stuff separate from the WCN stuff?
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Sep 13, 2019 14:11
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"Daaamn, this poo poo is restaurant!"
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Sep 13, 2019 14:13
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The Venn diagram of nerds that paid for Achewood and nerds that archive content has a little overlap in the middle that just says "CALL BOB GIACOMINELLO WITH RE/MAX TODAY"
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Sep 13, 2019 14:18
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xiw posted:When she referred to ring tones as "ringers," however, his romantic bubble I know Achewood is a celebration, etc., but goddamn if this isn't an evocative sentence E: wow
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Sep 13, 2019 14:38
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I need closure on if Ray ever got hosed in the culo! 
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Sep 14, 2019 01:27
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Jerusalem posted:I need closure on if Ray ever got hosed in the culo! COMMODORE SEX ACT
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Sep 14, 2019 01:42
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Jerusalem posted:I need closure on if Ray ever got hosed in the culo! You guessed it: It's a Todd Got hosed Wednesday. Tell your parents.
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Sep 14, 2019 04:38
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Deathlove posted:COMMODORE SEX ACT Nah, a commodore is just prostate stimulation with your fingers.
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Sep 14, 2019 09:52
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It's just "Good Times" for your sub-navel region.
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Sep 14, 2019 14:06
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Phy posted:I know Achewood is a celebration, etc., but goddamn if this isn't an evocative sentence Téodor's thing about how he had self-defeating and impossible standards made it all the more disappointing when they actually showed up in the person of Penny
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Sep 14, 2019 19:52
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Deathlove posted:COMMODORE SEX ACT to the tune of "eleanor rigby"
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Sep 14, 2019 20:12
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Mr. Dick's pretty sure he just bought a gram of Golden Tabloid.
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Sep 14, 2019 22:24
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Hot take: I’d be down for new achewood strips
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Sep 14, 2019 23:42
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and a redesign of the website that works on mobile
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Sep 14, 2019 23:43
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Trumps Baby Hands posted:and a redesign of the website that works on mobile 
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Sep 14, 2019 23:56
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Inexplicable Humblebrag posted:to the tune of "eleanor rigby" COMMODORE SEX ACT I am FOR REAL
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Sep 15, 2019 03:21
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Trumps Baby Hands posted:Hot take: I’d be down for new achewood strips What is Onstad even doing these days?
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Sep 15, 2019 04:09
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CAPT. Rainbowbeard posted:What is Onstad even doing these days? Suffering from Portlandia Syndrome.
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Sep 15, 2019 04:12
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He’s obviously moved on, and it’s for the best. All his attempts to stoke the coals have ended with some pretty sloppy stuff that doesn’t deserve the same characters as Mexican Magical Realism or Airwolf.
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Sep 15, 2019 04:24
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The final Penny arc was real bad and I don't want to read something like that again
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Sep 15, 2019 05:11
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I'd just settle for higher-res versions of the strips we already have, which feels like it should be totally doable via some batch Photoshop process. It's all vector graphics and Arial font, surely an algorithm can figure out how to scale that.
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Sep 15, 2019 05:59
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Erebus posted:I'd just settle for higher-res versions of the strips we already have, which feels like it should be totally doable via some batch Photoshop process. It's all vector graphics and Arial font, surely an algorithm can figure out how to scale that.
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Sep 15, 2019 06:07
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Shibawanko posted:The final Penny arc was real bad and I don't want to read something like that again Achewood is pretty rough when it's not about dudes duding it up
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Sep 15, 2019 07:30
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bony tony posted:Achewood is pretty rough when it's not about dudes duding it up That's her sustenance. That's how she works.
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Sep 15, 2019 09:01
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Just give me a giant hardcover anthology with all the strips and there alt texts as captions, I would LITERALLY pay $150 for such a book if it existed. I just feel like Onstadt is paralyzed by anxiety about Achewood. It’s truly lightning in a bottle and every time he goes back to twist the lid and try again it seems like more of the spark seeps out and it fades. Just rebottle the lightning in a crisp new package and ship it, you dweeb!
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Sep 15, 2019 13:39
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