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my dog died im sad posted:Wtf are the midichlorians supposed to be? That was one of my least favorite things about the phantom menace. Making the force into dbz power levels. The force is an energy field created by all living things. It surrounds us, penetrates us, it binds the galaxy together. Unless you don't have any bullshit microscopic bugs in your blood, then it doesn't really apply to you.
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Sep 14, 2019 19:01
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ChaosTheory posted:I have been under the impression that midichlorians are just tiny living things that gather and live near force sensitive people... and thus more midichlorians, the more potential force ability a user might have. I have no problem with this being a thing. All that's said is that they are cellular symbionts that communicate the will of the Force in some way and make life possible (ie. all life has them and presumably can know the will of the Force), that Yoda has a high concentration of them, but Anakin has way higher, well into freak territory. They don't know what that means. There is a prophecy that the midichlorians will conceive a child (gross). Also, even if we interpret that as meaning that they cause the Force (they are clearly Force antennas tho), the fanon idea that Vader lost his turbo Force potential because his balls were burned off is wrong as "midichlorian count" is about concentration; number per cell, not total count accumulative.
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Sep 14, 2019 19:27
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what a completely terrible addition to the series.
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Sep 14, 2019 19:39
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Clark Nova posted:Star Wars is a post-literate society where almost no one understands the technology they use and all of the actual labor is done by robot slaves, so the jedi's theories on the force are pretty much anti-vaxxer chemtrail flat-earth poo poo Alternatively, as one of the most powerful government agencies in existence in the universe it would absolutely behoove the Jedi to vaccinate everyone except 'remarkable exceptions' AGAINST midochlorians. "It's for the best", the Jedi equivalent of the red Cross insists as they press the hyper syringe to my child. "You don't want Sith fever". Meanwhile in their temples, their chosen younglings run rampant with the drat things like cellular lice.
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Sep 14, 2019 19:39
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Wait a second, does Vader canonically have no balls
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Sep 14, 2019 19:45
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Torquemada posted:Wait a second, does Vader canonically have no balls He must have balls, midichlorians are stored in the balls!
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Sep 14, 2019 19:53
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bruvs be4 luvs
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They're gone. After they fell off in the fire they were encased in metal cubes and eventually ended up as Han Solo's dice. They became one with the Force in that scene in The Last Jedi and Anakin's Force ghost could finally be at peace. The theme of ghost balls will be further explored in STAR WARS Episode IX: The Land of the Rising Cock.
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Sep 14, 2019 20:30
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Opening crawl, John williams score blares, screen wipe. Luke drinks alien tit milk for 2 hours, credits roll
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Sep 16, 2019 04:07
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Midichlorians are stored in the Balls.
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Sep 16, 2019 04:17
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my dog died im sad posted:Midichlorians are stored in the Balls. In the Star Wars universe they're called Pods.
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Sep 16, 2019 04:20
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Cat Army
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dudeness posted:In the Star Wars universe they're called Porgs.
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Sep 16, 2019 12:54
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my dog died im sad posted:Midichlorians are stored in the Balls. Wut about Jediesses
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Sep 16, 2019 13:04
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DeadFatDuckFat posted:But what if Knives Out is really good tho That would subvert the gently caress out of my expectations Lil Swamp Booger Baby posted:That PC game from the late 90s that was a Gungan ecology sim. Gungan Frontier was the poo poo. XYZAB fucked around with this message at 13:09 on Sep 16, 2019 |
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Sep 16, 2019 13:07
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Handen posted:That would subvert the gently caress out of my expectations Dude had two good stories in him (Brick/Looper), and only one of them I would consider to be a good-ish film (Brick). Then again, the genre and way it was shot allowed for rough edges and questionable director decisions to look like they were intentional and not rookie mistakes. Also, does anyone give a poo poo about Rey or any other character in the franchise right now? Like do any of you actually care what happens to them?
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Sep 16, 2019 15:26
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she's no luuke, that's for sure
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Sep 16, 2019 15:27
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I was really looking forward to more Kylo Ren after ep7 but I just can’t give a poo poo anymore.
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Sep 16, 2019 15:31
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Blistex posted:
Other than Rey and Kylo I don't even know or can't keep the names straight and don't give a poo poo to try. It's almost impressive. And for those two they both feel like such weak people in general that I feel more embarrassed for them than impressed by anything they've done Like, Luke may have been socially awkward at times. But I never felt embarrassed for him Jedi cheat moding his way through the death star fight, where everything Rey does just feels really... Underserved or something. Kylo this goes 5x for. I just literally do not understand his character or why he's been given the status he has. It's... Ridiculous. Big Beef City fucked around with this message at 15:37 on Sep 16, 2019 |
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Sep 16, 2019 15:32
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Kylo’s an interesting character but that’s almost all down to Driver’s performance. He’s written as a tantruming twerp but injects enormous pathos and sex into it. Most of the other actors are very limited (Ridley, Boyega) or phoning it in (Isaac, Christie, Ford, Nyongo, Del Toro). It’s hard to blame them since they have fuckall to work with. The characters in these movies are very sketchily drawn even by comparison to the original movies which, lest we forget, got bollocked by their actors for their weirdness and goofy dialogue.
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Sep 16, 2019 15:41
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Big Beef City posted:Like, Luke may have been socially awkward at times. But I never felt embarrassed for him Jedi cheat moding his way through the death star fight, where everything Rey does just feels really... Underserved or something. Wow look at this misogyny....
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Sep 16, 2019 15:42
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Driver saved that character and I still hate it. I'm just going by the idea of what he is. Even in the context of "it's Star Wars" it's a poo poo character.
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Sep 16, 2019 15:44
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Chomp8645 posted:Wow look at this misogyny.... I knew that was coming. Thanks. Like, literally as I was typing it on my phone I said "... Someones gonna do it". And you did it.
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Sep 16, 2019 15:44
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Big Beef City posted:I knew that was coming. It was either that or accuse you of being a Russian bot.
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Sep 16, 2019 15:46
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I can be both. Please don't limit me.
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Sep 16, 2019 15:49
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i'm just looking forward to 'Watto: A Star Wars Story'
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Sep 16, 2019 15:50
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Big Beef City posted:Other than Rey and Kylo I don't even know or can't keep the names straight and don't give a poo poo to try. I tried to get an apologist to explain what they were seeing once. It went something like this. Rey: Literal nobody. Kylo: Teenager who is mad at his dad. ...and that's it. So the new Star Wars is, at best, a shoegaze slice of life film where two totally uninteresting characters have their own weird reactions to normal life stresses. So it's Napoleon Dynamite or Slackers, except it happens in space so there's no social backdrop to develop a feel for, so all the commentary lands totally flat. There is however grossout titty milk drinking and yo mama jokes and stuttering. So at least that part "fits" the genre.
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Sep 16, 2019 15:51
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The only character who's fate I care about is the Emperor, but obviously they aren't gonna kill him off so I can skip this one.
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Sep 16, 2019 15:52
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Basically see tlj as "rich white male feminist ally: the movie".
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Sep 16, 2019 15:58
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Big Beef City posted:Kylo this goes 5x for. I just literally do not understand his character or why he's been given the status he has. It's... Ridiculous. My read on why the First Order is led by two twentysomething twats answering to a dope in a gold bathrobe is that it’s not really the Empire 2.0. That is just their propaganda. They’re a paramilitary force raised by wealthy magnates like Snoke, which is taking advantage of the impotence of the post-imperial government to weaken it further so that these star wars and the associated military-industrial gravy train can continue. It’s made clear in ANH that the empire is a dominant force in the galaxy that controls all sorts of planets, ostensibly through representative government but realistically through the threat of their Starfleet. Nothing of the kind is ever made clear about the First Order. As far as we can tell they’re a fleet and army based off a space station that got blown up. Their tactics are those of terrorism, not of a state. They don’t want to conquer the nascent republic, but to shatter it. They don’t want to seize central authority, but to prevent it. So to their financial backers, incompetent goons like Hux and Kylo are the ideal leaders: they’re vicious enough to smash their weak opponents, but not smart enough to take the reins for themselves: useful idiots basically. Of course Kylo is (slightly) less dumb than everyone expected and does just that. Mind you ep9 and a bunch of gobshit tie in novels probably contradict this, but who cares.
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Sep 16, 2019 16:01
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I'm the ten or so ships that fit into a single shot and literally represent the entirety of a galactic war.
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Sep 16, 2019 16:06
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Chomp8645 posted:I'm the ten or so ships that fit into a single shot and literally represent the entirety of a galactic war. Yeah, this is a major part of what inspires this read. The forces involved in this star war are all quite modest in size. It’s essentially a private war between two rich people, Snoke and Leia, who have taken advantage of the state’s weakness to raise private armies and go to town on each other for uh...some reason
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Sep 16, 2019 16:09
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Corollary: Snoke was the Hugo Boss to Sheev’s Hitler
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Sep 16, 2019 16:44
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my dog died im sad posted:Wtf are the midichlorians supposed to be? That was one of my least favorite things about the phantom menace. Making the force into dbz power levels. https://twitter.com/Herms98/status/936097133731627008 Arika Toriyama (paraphrased) posted:Every Saiyan has a varying amount of S-Cells. A good heart increases your S-Cell count. Super Saiyan is gained through surpassing a threshold for both S-Cells and battle power and having a trigger to boost that count, unlocking the form. Force and DBZ power levels are now midochloricans and s-cells, so they are quite literally the same thing. Kylo should try screaming a lot harder before the next time Rey whips his rear end again.
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Sep 16, 2019 17:19
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Snoke! What a character that guy was! Sure was a villain, that Snoke
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Sep 16, 2019 17:41
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when all the chips are down you gotta go for snoke
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Sep 16, 2019 17:43
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If you wanna hang out, You gotta take him out, Snokaine
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Sep 16, 2019 17:46
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anytime the question is raised of what the force is, whichver character is closest to the camera at the time should just look directly at the camera, say "magic", and do jazz hands
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Sep 16, 2019 17:46
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even in TLJ Kylo is a p great character and shows a version of the dark side that reminds me of the OTs. like something that would actually be tempting to the shitloads of Kylos in the real world. Driver elevates it but the character is still so much better conceived than any other new addition. I can't wait to see him squandered for 4hrs again before predictably sacrificing himself to kill Palps. 
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Sep 16, 2019 17:51
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Hey hey hey hey Snoke Sheev everyday
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Sep 16, 2019 17:53
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Saint Drogo posted:even in TLJ Kylo is a p great character and shows a version of the dark side that reminds me of the OTs. like something that would actually be tempting to the shitloads of Kylos in the real world. Driver elevates it but the character is still so much better conceived than any other new addition. i like the kylo ren character but i dont think he's really that far off from the young anakin character. they both fit the general "angsty young powerful man cant control what he wants to control and loses his poo poo" type. driver is just a much better/more interesting actor than christensen
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Sep 16, 2019 18:08
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revwinnebago posted:So the new Star Wars is, at best, a shoegaze slice of life film where two totally uninteresting characters have their own weird reactions to normal life stresses. That sounds like a way better movie. Some kind of art-house type movie about some teenage losers doing nothing, that just happen to live in a giant galactic society with spaceships everywhere, but they basically never leave their own backyards.
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Sep 16, 2019 18:10
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