|
AITA for asking my girlfriend not to wear a Halloween costume? My girlfriend and I are both 21 years old. I don't know why, but she's already started planning Halloween parties and costumes with her friends. She wants to go to a few parties and clubs that night, and she wants us to go together. She wants to wear a sexy Princess Jasmine costume. Jasmine already wears pretty revealing clothes in the animated movie, but my girlfriend just wants to wear a blue bra and a loose pair of pants that is very transparent and see through (not western style pants, more middle eastern style, but not exactly). I am a very big fan of Aladdin and I played Aladdin in a school play, so I was actually very happy with her initial idea of a Jasmine costume, and was touched thinking she was doing it for me. I am not very comfortable with such a revealing "sexy" costume though. AITA for asking her not to wear this costume? She was pretty upset with me, and is dead set on wearing this outfit, whether I agree with it or not. I understand that I have no right to control what she wears, and that it's her body and her choice. But seeing how uncomfortable I am with my girlfriend wearing such revealing clothes, I don't see any other alternative, but to ask her not to wear it, or not go with her on Halloween. Even then, if I don't go with her, I'm not sure if I'm okay with her going to many parties and bars on her own dressed like that, when she has a boyfriend. I know how crazy such college, especially with massive amounts of drinking on Halloween. A lot of her female friends are also planning on wearing revealing "sexy" outfits, and I guess it's par for the course for Halloween. I genuinely do not want to come across as a controlling prudish rear end in a top hat, and I'm not forcing her to do anything, but I don't like how the whole thing has gone down.
|
#
?
Sep 25, 2019 22:21
|
|
|
|
| # ? Jun 4, 2024 02:26 |
|
|
AreWeDrunkYet posted:Isn't there still some disagreement between child care experts on whether an immediate, mild spanking for dangerous behavior for children who are too young to understand is reasonable reinforcement? Like a toddler trying to run into the road or grab an animal's tail. No because if the kid is too young to understand reinforcement you really shouldn't let them run around near the road anyway. In this instance the best thing is prevention, by not allowing your kid to get into the dangerous situation to begin with.
|
|
#
?
Sep 25, 2019 22:24
|
|
|
AITA - I joked with my 'Native American' friend that nobody cares about his people.quote:I have been friends with this guy for about 3 years now, he's great - he has a great sense of humor which makes this situation I'm in more strange. Like the title says, he's native american - cree to be exact. He fascinates me because I've never met many natives before and he looks about how you expect him to look - long black hair - he's tall - high cheekbones etc. This situation happened a day ago - I need some other eyes to tell me If I did wrong here. And I should mention 'jokingly'
|
|
#
?
Sep 25, 2019 22:25
|
|
|
AITA for planning on only getting one of my kids Christmas gifts? Throwaway because some of my church friends know my main account. Backstory: My husband and I have two kids (both teenagers). We raised our children to be Christian (as is our faith), but also didn’t want to force them into our religion so as soon as they turned 13 they were allowed to no longer come to church, participate in saying grace before meals, etc.. One of our kids has continued with church and their faith very adamantly. Our other kid has come to church more sporadically and over the past half year or so has began to explore Buddhism. More recently they have been telling us that they are no longer Christian, but they are Buddhists. While we are disappointed that they are no longer Christian, I believe everyone is entitled to their own religion and I am proud that my daughter is exploring her faith. Current Issue: At dinner recently we were talking about travel plans for Christmas (we usually will rent a cabin somewhere for family time) and I mentioned that I wasn’t planning to get our non-Christian daughter any big gifts since her religion doesn’t celebrate Christmas. She was immediately upset. I told her that I would get her some little goodies so she didn’t feel too left out, but that she shouldn’t expect to partake in a religious holiday for a religion she doesn’t believe in. She said (I’m so many words) it’s not fair for us to spend money on our other child’s gifts, but not her and that we were punishing her for not being Christian. It doesn’t make sense to me to give her gifts to celebrate the birth of Jesus when she doesn’t believe he is our savior. I told her if she really felt it were unfair, I would donate the amount of money I spent on our other kid to a charity of her choice in her name. She didn’t like this either. My husband and I have since talked and he has very mixed feelings on the whole situation. AITA? Edited to add: not sure if this matters, but I have made it clear to her that if she ever wanted to celebrate any holidays pertaining to her religion I would do my best and get her what she needs to celebrate. My goal is not to hinder her exploration of Buddhism. Edited to add: I see a lot of comments about how Christmas isn’t a Christian holiday and I agree that many families celebrate a very commercialized Christmas. We (for example) do not involve Santa in our celebration, but we do (for example) read from the Bible and sing Hymns. Regardless of what others do, our family takes the holiday as an opportunity to celebrate and thank God for all that he has done and provided for us. Final Edit (Hopefully): I hear you all and I know I have a lot of reflection ahead of me. Even though some of this is hard to read, I really do appreciate you all taking the time to respond. I think my family has a lot of discussion ahead of us and I specifically have some growth to do as a mother and Christian. I also want to let those of you who have voiced concerns know that both of my children are loved by my husband and myself and that I plan on talking with my daughter (maybe even showing her this thread) about how I can do better by her.
|
|
#
?
Sep 25, 2019 22:28
|
|
|
AITA for planning on only getting one of my kids Christmas gifts? Throwaway because some of my church friends know my main account. Backstory: My husband and I have two kids (both teenagers). We raised our children to be Christian (as is our faith), but also didn’t want to force them into our religion so as soon as they turned 13 they were allowed to no longer come to church, participate in saying grace before meals, etc.. One of our kids has continued with church and their faith very adamantly. Our other kid has come to church more sporadically and over the past half year or so has began to explore Buddhism. More recently they have been telling us that they are no longer Christian, but they are Buddhists. While we are disappointed that they are no longer Christian, I believe everyone is entitled to their own religion and I am proud that my daughter is exploring her faith. Current Issue: At dinner recently we were talking about travel plans for Christmas (we usually will rent a cabin somewhere for family time) and I mentioned that I wasn’t planning to get our non-Christian daughter any big gifts since her religion doesn’t celebrate Christmas. She was immediately upset. I told her that I would get her some little goodies so she didn’t feel too left out, but that she shouldn’t expect to partake in a religious holiday for a religion she doesn’t believe in. She said (I’m so many words) it’s not fair for us to spend money on our other child’s gifts, but not her and that we were punishing her for not being Christian. It doesn’t make sense to me to give her gifts to celebrate the birth of Jesus when she doesn’t believe he is our savior. I told her if she really felt it were unfair, I would donate the amount of money I spent on our other kid to a charity of her choice in her name. She didn’t like this either. My husband and I have since talked and he has very mixed feelings on the whole situation. AITA? Edited to add: not sure if this matters, but I have made it clear to her that if she ever wanted to celebrate any holidays pertaining to her religion I would do my best and get her what she needs to celebrate. My goal is not to hinder her exploration of Buddhism. Edited to add: I see a lot of comments about how Christmas isn’t a Christian holiday and I agree that many families celebrate a very commercialized Christmas. We (for example) do not involve Santa in our celebration, but we do (for example) read from the Bible and sing Hymns. Regardless of what others do, our family takes the holiday as an opportunity to celebrate and thank God for all that he has done and provided for us. Final Edit (Hopefully): I hear you all and I know I have a lot of reflection ahead of me. Even though some of this is hard to read, I really do appreciate you all taking the time to respond. I think my family has a lot of discussion ahead of us and I specifically have some growth to do as a mother and Christian. I also want to let those of you who have voiced concerns know that both of my children are loved by my husband and myself and that I plan on talking with my daughter (maybe even showing her this thread) about how I can do better by her.
|
|
#
?
Sep 25, 2019 22:30
|
|
|
LadyPictureShow posted:AITA - I joked with my 'Native American' friend that nobody cares about his people. 'hahaha, that would be pointless because we genocided your people so hard you're dying out! soon you will be no more! lol cheers!' 'wait....was it something i said?'
|
|
#
?
Sep 25, 2019 22:32
|
|
|
DragQueenofAngmar posted:this is only sort of relevant but does anyone else get those migrations of hundreds of tiny toad babies every 3-4 years where they live? some years in spring when it rains and the backyard gets muddy you’ll walk out in the morning/evening and waves of roads about the size of a pea will be hopping in tandem across the yard Oh my god I loving wish! E lol at the Christian lady thinking anything she does at Christmas is originally for Christians anyway. Like jeez lady be nice to your kids while y'all celebrate your pagan gifting holidays. Scathach fucked around with this message at 22:43 on Sep 25, 2019 |
|
#
?
Sep 25, 2019 22:37
|
|
|
Christmas lady is 100% the rear end in a top hat. Definitely Christ-like to selectively treat one of your children like poo poo
|
|
#
?
Sep 25, 2019 22:53
|
|
|
I judged her to BTA when I found out she has "church friends".
|
|
#
?
Sep 25, 2019 23:34
|
|
|
AITA for not want to nominate my wife for an award? My wife is a social worker and a great one at that. She is always going above and beyond for her clients/patients and always putting in crazy hours. Yesterday she showed a community award and mentioned it would be nice to win that. Well recently she started a major community project that is starting to take off. This is extra and not a part of her job in anyway shape or form and I told her I would make the nomination next year after her program is up and running because everything she has done so far was in the scope of her job. Well she gets upset and says I never support her and that she has been doing alot of things that are not part of her job and helping her clients off hours because some are in horrible situations. So Reddit Am I the rear end in a top hat?
|
|
#
?
Sep 25, 2019 23:55
|
|
|
Smirking_Serpent posted:AITA for not want to nominate my wife for an award? WHO GIVES A poo poo YOU STUPID rear end in a top hat.
|
|
#
?
Sep 25, 2019 23:57
|
|
|
I can understand toad stacking and bumhole shaming and all sorts of sex kinks I personally find revolting but I just don't understand that at all.
|
|
#
?
Sep 26, 2019 00:06
|
|
|
Smirking_Serpent posted:AITA for not want to nominate my wife for an award? 100% chance this guy gets really mad about tipping too.
|
|
#
?
Sep 26, 2019 00:09
|
|
|
quote:she was like "my fleshy dingleberry only gets worse cause you suck on it so hard it has its own hickies"  
|
|
#
?
Sep 26, 2019 00:36
|
|
|
I don’t know what the worst sentence I had ever read was before, but this one will stick with me forever.
|
|
#
?
Sep 26, 2019 00:43
|
|
|
There's a thread title in there somewhere
|
|
#
?
Sep 26, 2019 00:48
|
|
|
Lucid Nonsense posted:Hey, Cumshitter, I had a layover in the Philly airport over the weekend and saw this in the airport Marriott when I was grabbing a beer. Is this a branch office or competitor? Just thought you should have a heads up in case it was a knockoff. Just seems redundant to me. Putting a briefcase in the hands of the male restroom icon says the same thing in multiple languages. In fact that's what they on the doors in the Admiral's Lounge, where I meet many of my international clients. cumshitter fucked around with this message at 01:04 on Sep 26, 2019 |
|
#
?
Sep 26, 2019 01:02
|
|
|
/r/relationships: you suck on my fleshy dingleberry so hard it has its own hickies
|
|
#
?
Sep 26, 2019 01:16
|
|
|
AITA for requesting a neutral location for a talk? Background - I have been friends with this dude for 13 years now, we met back in college. we were in each other's weddings, I was at the birth of both kids, and almost every Sunday for the past two years, my wife and I go over to their place to hang, have lunch, and play with their kids, ages 5 and 2. Anyway, my wife (J) posted on facebook about a month ago about the something she disappoved of, and my friend's wife (S) went off because it was something she supported wholeheartedly. Lots of nasty comments on facebook, both on the post and in chats. J and I are rather upset about this since we could have talked about it at any of the Sunday lunches, not had a blow up on a public forum. J and I figure its time to talk, try to clear the air, and try to discuss how we can communicate better to avoid future blow ups. As we are feeling vulnerable and this is a serious conversation, we want to have it at a neutral location and requested they leave their kids behind so as to limit distractions. (I should mention this is taking place over text in a group chat since that's how we normally communicated) This did not go over well. Every suggestion we made was met with questions and push back. Why the talk, why neutral location, why no kids? Multiple times throughout the texts saying how inconvenient it all is for them. Finally decided to discuss it later. S has since unfriended us on facebook and we haven't received a single text from them in 3 weeks. I just...I worry that we made too strict of demands for the talk. I feel like our request was reasonable, but now that things have ended...I'm conflicted. Are we the assholes? Should we have sent more messages, reached out more, just met at their place despite our misgivings? Why was the onus completely on us to do these things though? the controversial issue? a weight-watchers app for kids
|
|
#
?
Sep 26, 2019 01:17
|
|
|
AITA for making my son pay off his $225 fine for vaping in the school bathroom instead of paying it off myselfquote:This one is pretty quick: My son is a junior in high school and has a minimum wage job. He saves any excess money that he earns so that he can use it to but PC’s and other electronics. He recently bought a new computer and had about 300 dollars left in his account. During school, a teacher caught him vaping in the bathroom (after I had continuously punished him for it) and had charged him with the $225 fine that the school has. As soon as he arrived at the house he demanded that I paid it off for him. I refused and he ran off into his room. The next day at work, I told my coworker about it and he told me that I should have paid it. So, Reddit AITA?
|
|
#
?
Sep 26, 2019 01:23
|
|
|
Imagine nurturing a child for a decade and a half and then they turn out to be a vaper.
|
|
#
?
Sep 26, 2019 01:25
|
|
|
Pinecone Sample posted:AITA for making my son pay off his $225 fine for vaping in the school bathroom instead of paying it off myself Jesus, did the mods nuke this one already too?
|
|
#
?
Sep 26, 2019 01:29
|
|
|
Batterypowered7 posted:The Japanese word for joke is "joudan". A Japanese professor recalled a time when he worked for a company with an American branch. He had to introduce someone named "Jordan" but was conflicted about how to pronounce the name, so as to not accidentally refer to the man as a joke. Ah, got it. Similarly, if your name is James but you usually go by Jim, consider switching back to James if you visit Thailand, so that you don’t introduce yourself to people like “Hi, I’m oval office.”
|
|
#
?
Sep 26, 2019 01:29
|
|
|
Peaceful Anarchy posted:A 17 year old woman in a hetero relationship having a baby means not only is she in a hosed up relationship, she had to go through pregnancy at 17. I'm going to let you in on a secret, many gay people, even super, super, super gay people have had heterosexual sex and even long term relationships before coming out. Children tend to result from heterosexual sex and relationships. It's really, really not uncommon, especially among lesbians.  I've had unprotected sex with more women than men, and I'm like super gay, like I lost count after sleeping with something like over 150 guys, like gay married gay.
|
|
#
?
Sep 26, 2019 01:33
|
|
|
AITA for telling my date not to tip the waitress who was flirting with him?quote:I met a guy on a dating app and he seemed cool, so I met him at a restaurant for dinner. The food was good and I enjoyed his company, but during our meal, the waitress was obviously flirting with him. My date also noticed that she was flirting with him to an extent that was disrespectful to me. By the time we were done, I was annoyed with the waitress and when my date was going to pay the bill I asked him not to tip her because of her poor service. She brought us the correct food items and everything, but she was not nearly as attentive to me as she was to him, and I found her flirting to be both rude and unprofessional. My date mentioned tipping only 10%, but I insisted that I thought she should get no tip, and so he tipped her nothing. AITA, or was the waitress? Are they married yet? 
|
|
#
?
Sep 26, 2019 01:34
|
|
|
Three Olives posted:I'm going to let you in on a secret, many gay people, even super, super, super gay people have had heterosexual sex and even long term relationships before coming out. Children tend to result from heterosexual sex and relationships. Theyve been together for 6 years with no mention of any man or non monogamy.
|
|
#
?
Sep 26, 2019 01:35
|
|
|
Pinecone Sample posted:AITA for telling my date not to tip the waitress who was flirting with him? Just gently caress him on the table, OP, that’ll show that
|
|
#
?
Sep 26, 2019 01:37
|
|
|
Pinecone Sample posted:AITA for making my son pay off his $225 fine for vaping in the school bathroom instead of paying it off myself
|
|
#
?
Sep 26, 2019 01:37
|
|
|
Barudak posted:Theyve been together for 6 years with no mention of any man or non monogamy. where did the child come from
|
|
#
?
Sep 26, 2019 01:38
|
|
|
bell jar posted:where did the child come from through miracles of modern science, children can be conceived without sexual intercourse.
|
|
#
?
Sep 26, 2019 01:39
|
|
|
The other woman might have (or have had) a functioning penis and testicles for all we know, it’s the Internet, we’re all spitballing
|
|
#
?
Sep 26, 2019 01:47
|
|
|
SirSamVimes posted:through miracles of modern science, children can be conceived without sexual intercourse. yet they've been together for 6 years without any mention of ivf. makes u think
|
|
#
?
Sep 26, 2019 01:48
|
|
|
Boyfriend (24M) hates it when I (23F) chill out while he still has homework to do. Ok so probably too much background but here we go - my boyfriend (24M) and I (23F) have been dating for three years and living together for about six months. He is still in school because he took time off before college, and I graduated a little over two years ago. I technically work 8-6 Monday through Friday plus one weekend shift a week. I typically come home after work and take our dog for a long, 1-2 hour walk or run every night, and then cook dinner most nights. I don’t mind doing any of these things - love my work, my dog, and cooking, and I much prefer being busy to being bored. My boyfriend is in his last year of college, and is taking a lighter course load than usual. He goes to campus from 9 am to 5 pm two days a week and stays home the other three days. I know he does homework on the days he’s home, but it also seems like he spends a lot of time hanging out with friends, watching TV, etc. I think this is great and how senior year should be. However, he often has a lot of homework left over to do in the evenings. My work is demanding and very emotionally taxing, but I never have to work on it after I leave the office, so after taking the dog out and cooking is done, I basically just want to lie on the couch and watch TV. When he has homework, I normally just plug in my headphones and watch TV on my computer, since we rent a studio. This drives my boyfriend NUTS. He said that he feels frustrated that I get to come home and just do nothing, while he has to work on the homework late into the evening. He asked if I would be willing to go watch TV or hang out at a nearby coffee shop or the library. I don’t really feel that this is fair. I don’t fault him at all for waiting to do homework until the evenings. But, I think I have just as much of a right to enjoy our apartment as he does. I also spend less time with the dog, and evenings are the only time I get to hang out and snuggle with her. But, on the flip side, I get why this is frustrating for him. He has a lot of trouble working anywhere that’s not super quiet because of an auditory processing issue, so working in a coffee shop isn’t really an option. And, I get why it’s irritating to see me hang around while he does work. It doesn’t feel like it would be productive to point out that he has plenty of time to hang around do nothing while during the days he’s not in school. I’m going to be honest - my instinct is to just go watch TV at a coffee shop to avoid the conflict. However, I know this will be unpleasant for me, and I know deep down I should try to deal with the issue now, instead of letting it simmer. Any advice for compromising on this or how to communicate about it without making into an argument about “who’s life is busier”? TLDR: boyfriend doesn’t like when I watch tv when he’s working on homework and wants me to go watch in a coffee shop Edit: thanks everyone for your responses. I feel validated that I’m not being totally unreasonable here. I do want to clarify that to me, the workload doesn’t seem quite as unbalanced as it maybe came across. He does all of the cleaning, running errands, making sure bills are timely, etc. I hate that stuff and basically picked the two household chores that I actually really enjoy and he does everything else. He’s also not angry with me or even really whining - I get the impression that he’s more frustrated with himself, and it just got let out in a weird way. But, after reading yalls responses, I think I will be a little bit firmer and just say that I’m not willing to leave during the evenings and we can try to find a solution together. I like the idea of putting up a divider - it also just seems healthy to be able to put ourselves in separate spaces if need be.
|
|
#
?
Sep 26, 2019 02:03
|
|
|
bell jar posted:where did the child come from Thats the mystery Im trying to not solve!
|
|
#
?
Sep 26, 2019 02:04
|
|
|
50% older lady got pregnant through intercourse 30% chance 17 year old got pregnant through intercourse 10% chance the kid is a sibling they're caring for and calling their child 5% chance they stole a baby 3% chance older lady got IVF 1.95% chance they adopted 0.04% chance they found the baby on their doorstep 0.01% chance immaculate conception
|
|
#
?
Sep 26, 2019 02:06
|
|
|
Peaceful Anarchy posted:50% older lady got pregnant through intercourse 0.01% is one in every 10,000. There were around 3,800,000 births in the US last year. That’s 380 immaculate conceptions?
|
|
#
?
Sep 26, 2019 02:15
|
|
|
Peaceful Anarchy posted:50% older lady got pregnant through intercourse It would make a lot of sense if she was the child of vape
|
|
#
?
Sep 26, 2019 02:20
|
|
|
Pirate Radar posted:0.01% is one in every 10,000. There were around 3,800,000 births in the US last year. That’s 380 immaculate conceptions? *Thinks back to Catholic classes from my childhood* Immaculate conception refers to Mary (and any additional people) conceived and born free of original sin. Jesus was not the immaculate conception. *Goes back to not thinking of Catholic classes*
|
|
#
?
Sep 26, 2019 02:22
|
|
|
Pirate Radar posted:0.01% is one in every 10,000. There were around 3,800,000 births in the US last year. That’s 380 immaculate conceptions? No, they're not saying 0.01% of all pregnancies, just this one.
|
|
#
?
Sep 26, 2019 02:22
|
|
|
|
| # ? Jun 4, 2024 02:26 |
|
|
Smirking_Serpent posted:AITA for asking my girlfriend not to wear a Halloween costume? I love that her response is basically, "I'm going to the club in this costume and likely getting laid. You're welcome to join me." 
|
|
#
?
Sep 26, 2019 02:51
|
|
