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dead prez posted:i think you should slam dunk your husband for being the worst kind of food bitch. life is about different flavors. people who want to eat the same thing always, make me so mad. try something new every day you can Dude there’s only like 7 kinds of animals, like 30 vegetables, maybe like 50 fruits, and like 4 grains you can make food out of. What are you supposed to do, eat a rain pancho with varnish on it? 
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Oct 1, 2019 07:28
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I grew up in Idaho and have never seen such a thing. Maybe its a Boise thing.
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Oct 1, 2019 07:30
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ClamdestineBoyster posted:Dude there’s only like 7 kinds of animals, like 30 vegetables, maybe like 50 fruits, and like 4 grains you can make food out of. What are you supposed to do, eat a rain pancho with varnish on it? basic statistics 7*30*50*4 == eleventy million
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Oct 1, 2019 07:33
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Antivehicular posted:flashing back to the picky-eater story where the dude in question bought a stack of frozen pizzas while on vacation so he could keep "his streak" of days only eating pizza up, allegedly for the sake of his "instagram followers" who were heavily invested in his malnutrition journey I’m just imagining a guy who does buy, let’s make what’s probably a charitable guess and say three dozen hot dogs a week. Because the first time he went to the supermarket and bought a bunch of dogs and buns (and presumably ketchup/mustard/relish, he’s not an animal), the cashier might be like “oh, having a barbecue this weekend?” And he would have two options: either lie and be like “oh... yeah, a barbecue” and then not come back to that store for a while, or if he’s not going to lie, just be like “no, these are for me” and return every week for more dogs, buns, and ketchup.
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Oct 1, 2019 07:36
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In college I was subsisting on 20 dollars or so of food a week so I had to make it last and yes, hotdogs were a part of it. The cashier knows theres no barbecue when youre buying the discount 40 pack of bar-s meat for 5 dollars, theres no reason to pretend. As lifestyles go, I do not recommend.
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Oct 1, 2019 07:44
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Fiancé [33F] watched a stripper masturbate for her Bachelorette Party nsfw The party was Saturday. She had hers and I [29M] also had my Bachelor Party that night. Her bridesmaids and friends hired a stripper for her. I knew in advance and she was giddy over it, and I trust her not to gently caress some stripper, so I supported her. Some of my guys were uncomfortable about hiring a stripper, so we set it up such that we go out, have fun, then only the people who want to go will come to a Strip Club with me at the end of the night and do our thing. I've been to strip clubs before, so my picture in my head is a lap dance, see some naked bodies, and if you want more, you go upstairs and pay for more. I didn't have any intention to go up and pay more, so we got a few lap dances, had some fun and called it a night. Her stripper came to a friend's house. We woke up in different places Sunday morning and teased each other we had crazy nights on the phone. Then I went to go pick her up and she let casually slip the stripper jerked off into a towel. That she was taken into a room alone cause all the other girls didn't want to see it and that she played with her boobs for him while he jerked off and came into a towel. She doesn't really hide anything from anyone, so she let it slip. I was not happy being shocked like that. I was taken aback, cause in my head a stripper doesn't perform sex acts. To me, cumming is a sex act. I got a little jealous but then chalked it up to it being a bachelorette party. I asked her if anything else other than dancing/grinding happened and she said no. Later in the day, I let it ruminate more and kept getting grossed out that some guy did that in front of her. I mean... Louis CK got in trouble for the same thing, so clearly someone draws a line there. So she starts getting messages from her bachelorette group and some pictures and videos come up. She says she wants to show me, but we're headed into a wedding vendor meeting, so I say not now. As I said, she doesn't hide anything, so while in the middle of the vendor meeting she shows me a picture of her on the floor (clothed) and whispers to me "I had spanx on!", the stripper in assless chaps in the 69 position. I'm not even thinking that this is in the middle of the dance and he could've been in that position for a fraction of a second for the picture. All my head goes to is that he's trying to give her oral sex. It took everything I had to not burst in anger there. All going through my head that moment is that she 1) doesn't even let ME go down on her, and some random dude is now all up in that area and 2) what the hell else went on at this thing that she didn't mention. We left the vendor and it became too much for me that I got very angry, screamed, and very immaturely said I want to cancel this wedding and that I don't want to hear anything or see any of the videos. In my head my trust was broken and if the guy jerked off in front of her, what isn't to say that he didn't try to perform oral sex on her. The next several hours I calmed down, word reached mutual friends who asked me to not throw this away. A female friend that was at the bachelorette supports my fiance that nothing crazy happened and she certainly did not cheat on me. She was drunk and it was part of the show, and that we are both at fault for not discussing boundaries beforehand. I conceded that if someone took a picture of me mid-lap dance that it could look like i'm doing something wrong. I asked to see the videos she was trying to show me earlier. I felt the jealousy build inside me. The stripper was definitely overly touchy... he came out and started kissing her immediately when she had a blindfold on, started groping her a little and bite-motioned her nipples in the video. Other clips got a bit crazier-- he air humped her, her with her legs around is waist and him gyrating. The picture I reacted to earlier there was enough distance between his face and her crotch and his crotch and her face that I had to concede I was overreacting. While I'm not thrilled about a lot of those things, they are technically part of lapdances, so I can't be upset about them. The air humping thing sucks, but that too I have chalked up to being part of the night. We talked it through and I had to concede this is both our faults for not communicating limits and not marking what I was uncomfortable with. This morning all I could think about was how grossed out I feel about this. She has said she would do the night all over again cause of how much love she was showered with-- that she didn't enjoy the stripper as much as other parts of the night and that if she'd known I was uncomfortable with the masturbation that she would not have gone through with it. She thought it was gross but says she let it happen because it was part of the "package". I just really can't stop being grossed out by it. I can't have a double standard about a dude gyrating on her if I had a girl gyrating on me... but today I am only thinking about that dude's bodily fluids... and the fact that it probably got on her dress and ugh. It's a spiral in my head and i'm not trying to let it be. I'm not a prude, I definitely have a higher sex drive than her, and feel more jealousy than anything. The fact that she was hyper sexual with a stranger and that I get that level of sexuality from her, but that it's always preempted by some level of prudishness. While I am not cancelling the wedding, i'm having a hard time with this. I can't even tell if my trust in her is shaken or that i'm just being held back by jealousy. For what it's worth, there are times when she has been hypersexual with me and encourages me to speak to what I want out of our sex life. We tried to do the make up sex thing and tried a new position and while it helped me feel better, out of anything that happened with her at her Bachelorette, that this jerking off thing is really bugging me. Any CONSTRUCTIVE thoughts are appreciated.
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Oct 1, 2019 07:45
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^ whats the hotdog game like tho rly
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Oct 1, 2019 07:46
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Power Khan posted:Fiancé [33F] watched a stripper masturbate for her Bachelorette Party Yikes. Yeah, that's call off the wedding worthy.
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Oct 1, 2019 07:53
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HMS Beagle posted:I grew up in Idaho and have never seen such a thing. Maybe its a Boise thing. It's an Albany expression.
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Oct 1, 2019 07:54
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Leon Einstein posted:Yikes. Yeah, that's call off the wedding worthy. the comments on that thread are mostly people telling him to get over himself because he went to a strip club and his desperately trying to take the advice 
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Oct 1, 2019 07:57
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MrQwerty posted:the comments on that thread are mostly people telling him to get over himself and his desperately trying to take the advice I hope its like his caterer and flowers people trying to keep the wedding on
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Oct 1, 2019 07:58
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When I read the title I assumed it was a female stripper because I'm bi and I still can't imagine someone wanting to watch a guy jacking off.
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Oct 1, 2019 07:59
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Somebody mentioned a male stripper AMA in the thread, in regard to "stuff that really happens and what you better not tell your fiance, phew" Idk, the whole tradition is extremely stupid.
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Oct 1, 2019 08:05
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quote:Have you ever felt unsafe while working? quote:Only a few times and never from the girls. Believe it or not, it's usually the young straight guys who cause the problems. Perhaps my presence makes them feel threatened, or they have something to prove. quote:What's the best stripper move you have? quote:I can twerk pretty well!
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Oct 1, 2019 08:08
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Power Khan posted:Lately, some girls request "The Helicopter." For those of you that don't know, that's swinging your penis around in a circle. strongly disagree with the idea there is someone on the internet that doesn't know what the helicopter is
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Oct 1, 2019 08:16
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pth pth pth we're running out of fuel!!!
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Oct 1, 2019 08:18
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I just kicked my fiance out (update to the savings for our son) UPDATE - Advice Wanted quote:So for those just joining us, my fiance, the father of my youngest (of 2) children, had told me for years that he had an account that he was putting £10 a week in for the child that is biologically related to him, to match the separate account I had where I was also putting in money for our son. Turns out he was lying. He had a couple hundred when he should have had over 10x that. His solution was to take money from my daughter, who is not biologically related to him, because myself and her biological father have both been contributing £10 a week each since I got pregnant. He then tried to guilt me into giving my son the money meant for my daughter, saying if I didn't then I would be showing favouritism, and I was stuck as I felt that whatever I did I would be being unfair to at least one person.
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Oct 1, 2019 08:47
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Future RP poster alert quote:AITA for insisting that my son’s therapist tells me why my son wants to see him. quote:I think I have an idea of why this kid wanted to see a therapist.
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Oct 1, 2019 09:11
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Power Khan posted:Fiancé [33F] watched a stripper masturbate for her Bachelorette Party At first I was like "what a bunch of prudes" then there's the weird poo poo about taking place in the bathroom alone together and a bunch of photos and videos and it's just like wtf have a normal strip show if you just wanna see naked hotties.
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Oct 1, 2019 10:08
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The thread and his account are deleted now heh. Probably found a blacklight and made use of it.
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Oct 1, 2019 11:17
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a hot gujju bhabhi posted:At first I was like "what a bunch of prudes" then there's the weird poo poo about taking place in the bathroom alone together and a bunch of photos and videos and it's just like wtf have a normal strip show if you just wanna see naked hotties. I’ve never understood the whole stripper bachelor/ette party thing. Most couples have clear lines of “I don’t want my SO to gently caress someone the night before the wedding” and while I’m sure that most of these parties are just fine or maybe a little awkward the ones we hear about just seem to derail everything for no reason. Like yeah, if you really need to see a naked stranger the night before you marry someone ostensibly for life, you do you, but a nice dinner out with people that are happy for you seems more pleasant by miles.
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Oct 1, 2019 13:17
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I feel like, and Ive 0 actual evidence, that as bachelor parties have gotten milder bachelorette parties have gotten wilder. Growing up it was like well obviously men get obscenely wasted and hire multiple strippers while women do fine dining and now its men go out to like a barcade and pass out at 9pm and women roam the streets in a feral pack throwing penis shaped kunai.
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Oct 1, 2019 13:42
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Barudak posted:I feel like, and Ive 0 actual evidence, that as bachelor parties have gotten milder bachelorette parties have gotten wilder. Growing up it was like well obviously men get obscenely wasted and hire multiple strippers while women do fine dining and now its men go out to like a barcade and pass out at 9pm and women roam the streets in a feral pack throwing penis shaped kunai. It's been at least 20 years that I've been hearing standup comedians say the worst thing you can do to your act and self-esteem is play a venue hosting a bachelorette party
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Oct 1, 2019 13:46
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tactlessbastard posted:How do you manage to dress yourself Wow look, another super waspy post.
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Oct 1, 2019 14:03
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My bachelor party: I stayed home with a few friends, we drank some wine and played instruments and xbox(?). Meanwhile my soon to be wife got drunk with her friends, and she physically had to pry off one of her non-single friends off a stranger to prevent her going home with the dude.
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Oct 1, 2019 14:03
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a hot gujju bhabhi posted:At first I was like "what a bunch of prudes" then there's the weird poo poo about taking place in the bathroom alone together and a bunch of photos and videos and it's just like wtf have a normal strip show if you just wanna see naked hotties. Yeah, there’s a huge difference between hiring a stripper to dance for a group (or even privately) and a private jerk-off show. Especially because of this line that I initially glossed over: quote:that she played with her boobs for him So she was topless and playing with herself to get the stripper off? I think that’s well over the line for most people.
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Oct 1, 2019 14:06
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I'm finally having a second (for the old country) wedding now that we can afford it, my first in the US was super low key and chill. But now like they're talking about bachelor parties and poo poo, with my sometime crazy football hooligan brothers in law, with fairly low levels of English, on an island known for being Ibiza East in some circles. I'm going to die lol.
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Oct 1, 2019 14:07
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sephiRoth IRA posted:Like yeah, if you really need to see a naked stranger the night before you marry someone ostensibly for life, you do you, but a nice dinner out with people that are happy for you seems more pleasant by miles. this made me think of hiring a stripper, but at like a classy steakhouse where a bunch of people in black tie are eating bone-in porterhouse chops and watching a woman in a cocktail dress strip to jazz piano by candlelight
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Oct 1, 2019 14:08
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AITA for demanding a male masseuse?quote:I (F, 24) have almost constant back pain due to having breasts that are disproportionate to my size. I don’t want to get a reduction because I don’t want to lose the ability to breastfeed, or lose any sensitivity. So I am saddled with pretty annoying back pain that I try my best to manage with physical therapy and massages. I have one masseuse - let’s call him Joe - that I use whenever I go to the massage parlor, which is maybe once a month. This masseuse is a very large, strong man and he uses a lot of force when he massages my back, which is how I like it. I’ve had other masseuses in the past but none have ever been as good as Joe because they haven’t used as much force to really get in there and relax my muscles. And I have not once had a satisfactory massage from a woman. This is not to say there are not talented female masseuses, but as I mentioned before I really prefer quite a bit of force, which necessitates a certain amount of strength.
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Oct 1, 2019 14:10
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Put that one right into your veins, there's so many possibilities this could go My (39M) wife (38F) has told me that her friends have invited her to a swingers club. She wants to go. I want to let her, but I am terrified that I will be ending our marriage by doing so. UPDATE: Let me be clear that she wants me AND her to go together at the same time to the same place. What I'm worried is that while for me, I'm 100% positive that I could have sex with another woman and have no desire to leave my wife, I'm NOT 100% positive that if she has sex with another man that she won't decide to leave me. I'm not saying that I think she's going to meet Dirk Diggler and divorce me the first time she goes, but that I'm opening a door that I won't be able to close. Questions: Has anyone done this, and regretted doing so? If I do go through with this, what can I do to mitigate my risks? A while back, my wife told me that her best friend (36F) invited her to a swingers club (Miami Velvet). We have been married since high school, and (as far as I know, since she COULD be lying to me about her sexual history) we haven't had too many (less than 5) other partners sexually. When she married me, I was in peak shape (I played football). I'll be the first to admit that I've let myself go a bit over the years (about 40 lbs). She, on the other hand, works out daily and eats like a drat pigeon, so she looks as fine as she did in high school (two daughters later, and she's still 'hawt'). She's not necessarily bugging me about going, but she has mentioned it like five or six times. Reading between the lines on this, it's something she REALLY wants to do. For context, she'll halfway hint that she wants sex with me ONCE. If I don't catch those smoke signals while the moon and stars are in perfect alignment, it could be at least another month or two before she'd try again. In contrast, in less that two months, she's brought up the swinging club like five or six times. I love my wife, and I'd do drat near anything for her, but I'd be lying if I didn't say I have some concerns about this: We are not exactly the demographic that I would expect to see in that club. I'm black, and my wife is black. I don't know if our white friends (for example, her BFF and her husband) are just being more open about the possibility of doing this, but our black friends are either not about it at all, or are lying to me when I ask if they've considered swinging. As I've mentioned, I've put on quite a few pounds. One of the things I love about my wife is that she is generally brutally honest (as in, I've caught her in a whopper or two, but for the most part, she's a straight shooter). She has told me to my face that she is no longer attracted to me sexually. We still have sex, but it's not like she's knocking on my door to get it. I can't get the idea out of my head that we would go and I would see nothing but 21-year old six-pack wielding, horse penis carrying, male gods. And I know you're thinking, "why don't you just lose some weight?" I've literally been starving myself since she's mentioned this, but I'm not going to get a six pack next week, no matter what I do. Let's just chalk the six pack up to next year at best, given work, kids, and you know, food. I'm afraid she'll find a younger guy who is better looking, and is a way better plumber than I am. I think that she loves me, but you never really know. Is she with me out of love, or because I'm a good father, and she doesn't want to be a single parent? Mentally, I think I could deal with her having sex with another man, since I know I wasn't her first. I know as a fact that I could have sex with another woman and that won't affect my marriage (and no, I've never cheated, but guys, you know exactly what I mean on this). I don't care if the vagina made the sun come up in the morning, I'm not leaving my wife and kids for it. Period. That being said, I think she has more options than I do. I don't think movie stars can't stay married because they are worse at it than everyone else, but I think they simply have WAY too many options. I'm not going to do the picture thing, but trust me when I say that if she feels like "upgrading" she could do so. I feel sometimes that the moment that she realizes that her being married and having two kids is no deterrent to many men, I'd be through. Sorry for the speech, but I wanted to give some context with the questions. [Inevitably]: quote:I've been to many of those clubs (called "lifestyle clubs" these days), with my wife. First thing to remember - you're not required to have sex while you're there. What I would recommend is going there the first time with the explicit agreement that neither of you will have any physical contact with others, and will only observe. Ffs do it lol Power Khan fucked around with this message at 14:16 on Oct 1, 2019 |
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Oct 1, 2019 14:10
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Boyfriend has a friend that he is committed to financially supporting and living with for the rest of his lifequote:I have a question for the cosmos (and the reddit community).
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Oct 1, 2019 14:15
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luxury handset posted:this made me think of hiring a stripper, but at like a classy steakhouse where a bunch of people in black tie are eating bone-in porterhouse chops and watching a woman in a cocktail dress strip to jazz piano by candlelight This is probably a thing. Maybe in Portland? There’s a strip club steakhouse in Portland but I wouldn’t necessarily call it “classy”
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Oct 1, 2019 14:30
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When I was in college my roomies and their friends were on their way out when I was getting home from work. "Oh dude, cool, we're on our way to The Strip Club, want to come?" 'Errrrrr.... i guess?' Got changed, I was so relieved  Moon Atari posted:Like: "oh drat, you caught me cheating, guess we will have to break up so I can be with the person I was cheating with, but you are still going to be just as close and treat me just as good as before minus the sex. Wait, you hate me now? I'm hurt and I thought you were more mature than that."  Now for another 3 hour Tenchi Muyo/Gundam Wing cryathon... FilthyImp fucked around with this message at 14:34 on Oct 1, 2019 |
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Oct 1, 2019 14:31
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Frog Act posted:Boyfriend has a friend that he is committed to financially supporting and living with for the rest of his life Before undertaking any serious action against J, she needs to find what are his horcruxes
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Oct 1, 2019 14:45
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picky eaters are so frustrating because it's so legitimate, like some people just can't loving eat anything and sometimes they're really delightful people whose friends just have to accommodate their being loving impossible in this one very small aspect. my picky eater friends/family are so beautiful and so embarrassing. i want to slap them. just eat the loving thing it's just a leaf
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Oct 1, 2019 15:09
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is this even what we're talking about right now? oh who cares it's an evergreen topic and this thread is a mess pick check your inbox, i love your life and universe
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Oct 1, 2019 15:11
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eat the fish eat it
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Oct 1, 2019 15:12
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a hot gujju bhabhi posted:At first I was like "what a bunch of prudes" then there's the weird poo poo about taking place in the bathroom alone together and a bunch of photos and videos and it's just like wtf have a normal strip show if you just wanna see naked hotties. yeah this isn't a strip show. the going to the bathroom and jerking off in front of her absolutely takes it into sex act territory, really not loving cool. The mental pretzels he's stretching himself into, to attempt to equate it to a female stripper, is just painful to watch. There's no scenario this is ok - if the genders were reversed and a female stripper masturbated in front of a guy alone in a room, that would still be WAY TOO FAR. I've always disliked 'bachlor/bachelorette' party culture because so often people abuse the fact that that they haven't had an explicit 'i'm not comfortable with X' conversation with their partner to knowingly push boundaries and bend the rules, or even straight up cheat because it's their 'last hurrah'.
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Oct 1, 2019 15:14
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/r/relationships: She doesn't even let ME go down on her
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Oct 1, 2019 15:14
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| # ? May 30, 2024 23:43 |
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SilvergunSuperman posted:/r/relationships: She doesn't even let ME go down on her haha that was the best part
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Oct 1, 2019 15:15
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