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PHIZ KALIFA
Dec 21, 2011

#mood

Anne Whateley posted:

Does this dude work at a school in NYC and did he have a mohawk? I had that guy as a prof and I would really love that explanation for his weirdness.

No and I'm not going to out the person who it is. I asked my wife if she watched the full video and she gave me a disgusted look, she just deleted it immediately when she saw the thumbnail. I asked if I could see it, or if I could get a snapshot of the email to share with y'all, and she expressed concern that I'm spending too much time online and not enough time caring for my newborn baby (who is a writhing pile of beetles but i digress)

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Anne Whateley
Feb 11, 2007
:unsmith: i like nice words

PHIZ KALIFA posted:

No and I'm not going to out the person who it is.
That sounds like a yes ok thanks. I will forever imagine that old bad prof looking at toy dinosaurs with lust in his eye.

bell jar
Feb 25, 2009

Smirking_Serpent posted:

I bought Jack a horse. My family has a horse farm so 'where can you hide a horse for two weeks' is thankfully not a problem.

Jack already met his new partner last week and he is very happy with him!


ohhhh my god gently caress you so much

PHIZ KALIFA
Dec 21, 2011

#mood
It's not clear who filmed the video, but the description is clear that the POV moves in such a way as to suggest being held on a tripod. maybe the dude had a remote control, but if not, it was definitely filmed.

one thing i just remembered is a few years back my wife bought a sack of those same tiny plastic dinos, with the intention of hiding them around the house. invariably it was left in a pile of Random Belongings where I stumbled across it, and then crammed them loose into her neglected laundry drawers as a reverse-prank upon her. a few years later we took them to a church during a wedding and hid them all around the chapel and reception area.

apparently they were still finding them months later and now the church won't do weddings for non-congregants anymore. the rumor was that it was some kind of dig at them about evolution, idk.

Heffer
May 1, 2003

I thought God came on the dinosaurs and made mankind. Isn't that how evolution works.

sephiRoth IRA
Jun 13, 2007

"Science is not only compatible with spirituality; it is a profound source of spirituality."

-Carl Sagan

Heffer posted:

I thought God came on the dinosaurs and made mankind. Isn't that how evolution works.

Panspermia indeed!

Panfilo
Aug 27, 2011

EXISTENCE IS PAIN😬

PHIZ KALIFA posted:

No and I'm not going to out the person who it is. I asked my wife if she watched the full video and she gave me a disgusted look, she just deleted it immediately when she saw the thumbnail. I asked if I could see it, or if I could get a snapshot of the email to share with y'all, and she expressed concern that I'm spending too much time online and not enough time caring for my newborn baby (who is a writhing pile of beetles but i digress)

Let she who is without sin cast the first beetle

PHIZ KALIFA
Dec 21, 2011

#mood
oh she's not free of sin at all. honestly i think the beetles are related. she found this weird old book in her family's creepy century-old mansion. . .

Tempura Wizard
Sep 15, 2006

spending all
spending
spending all my time

Tomfoolery posted:

Skip the rest of my post if you're not in the mood for a downer:

Wife (38F) is convinced that she is pregnant even though that every pregnancy test (store-bought and medical) comes back negative. It's taking a toll on our mariage because she thinks I am going to abandon her and "our twins"


Update : Wife (38F) is convinced that she is pregnant even though that every pregnancy test (store-bought and medical) comes back negative. It's taking a toll on our mariage because she thinks I am going to abandon her and "our twins"

This is really sad and the OP seems like a good person based on his replies. This would be devastating. I hope she gets the help she needs and everything turns out alright. :smith:

Midnight Voyager
Jul 2, 2008

Lipstick Apathy
I have not been able to stop laughing at the dino jerker since Phiz popped in to confirm it's a dino researcher.

Do you think he does it because he's into dinosaurs? The research, not the jerking. Or do you think her jerks it over dinosaurs because that's what he researches?

MarcusSA
Sep 23, 2007

It’s because dinosaurs are hot ok?

Pinecone Sample
Oct 12, 2010

THIS ACCOUNT HAS BEEN SEIZED
by the United States Federal Bureau of Investigation in accordance with a seizure warrant issued pursuant to 69 U.S.C Sec. 420
Cumming on dinosaur figurines sounds like a personalized blackmail fetish

That one pays for

Dazerbeams
Jul 8, 2009

The man has a passion for dinosaurs. If you love your job...

Play
Apr 25, 2006

Strong stroll for a mangy stray

cumshitter posted:

Idiot got the math wrong. The womb queues up babies like a production building in an RTS. So it will be one baby every 4.5 months, but they get delivered at the same time. At least that's my understanding of how baginas work.

no offense cumshitter but I'll accept your expertise on financial matters, adopted twinks, glory/business holes and nothing else

tactlessbastard posted:

More like girlfriend found my meth lab

if that were the case he probably wouldn't have insisted on calling the cops

please knock Mom! posted:

Just liking order and symmetry isn’t OC D.

He said in the post that she's been diagnosed with mild OCD and receives therapy for it.

Tashilicious posted:

Being the annoying performative person who just krammers into every conversation with "Sure you enjoyed that movie, but people are being raped to death every minute in africa you heartless monster" isn't developing critical thoughts, it's being an rear end in a top hat.

the one yammering on about frozen 2 and the aforementioned eco-kramer are BOTH awful

Smirking_Serpent posted:

AITA for telling my stepmom to leave ‘the loving room’ after her phone kept chiming when we were visiting our dying grandma?

Grams is very very old and is about to pass away any day now. She has an oxygen tank, a nurse who stays with her at home, and the thing that breaks my heart the most is that her mind is completely as sharp as ever, it’s just her body that’s giving up.

:thunk:

I realize that she's trying to say she wishes the body wasn't breaking down, but it almost sounds like she wishes the mind was

Cockmaster posted:

Wait, even the doctor is buying into the idea of "you don't have kids, therefore your life isn't worth all that much"? I'm not familiar with all the specific rules of medical ethics, but I'm pretty sure that that would generally be frowned upon. Same with encouraging someone (regardless of family status) to undergo a crazy high-risk surgery to donate an organ whose recipient couldn't be trusted to take care of it.

doctors will do anything that results in more surgeries for them to perform

DAD LOST MY IPOD
Feb 3, 2012

Fats Dominar is on the case


Megillah Gorilla posted:

I'm so glad I never had to deal with that bullshit.

The score you got was the score you got.

Ditto with A, B, C, etc. Actual mark out of 100% so I know exactly how well I did, not this 80ish percent correct.

That poo poo wouldn't fly in answering a question, so why would it be okay in grading a question?

i didn't have to deal with that until law school. i think law schools are pretty much the last bastion of curved grading.

Fitzy Fitz
May 14, 2005




This is weird, but I feel like I've seen or heard of the dino thing before now.

TheKennedys
Sep 23, 2006

By my hand, I will take you from this godforsaken internet
I think I found dino guy

Miserable Maid
Apr 22, 2010

:minnie: Cat Army :minnie:

Play posted:

:thunk:

I realize that she's trying to say she wishes the body wasn't breaking down, but it almost sounds like she wishes the mind was


Well, she might be wishing it. Because since Grandma's mind is still lucid, she's extremely aware of her pain, suffering, and impending death. Sometimes the mind falling apart is a blessing, since they tend not to think too far ahead at that point.

Play
Apr 25, 2006

Strong stroll for a mangy stray

Miserable Maid posted:

Well, she might be wishing it. Because since Grandma's mind is still lucid, she's extremely aware of her pain, suffering, and impending death. Sometimes the mind falling apart is a blessing, since they tend not to think too far ahead at that point.

Speaking for myself I'd take any measure of physical pain over the existential horror of being trapped in your own broken mind

MrQwerty
Apr 15, 2003

LOVE IS BEAUTIFUL
(づ ̄ ³ ̄)づ♥(‘∀’●)

Sunswipe posted:

Spin what? He figured out what the questions on a test would be. Before GCSE and A Level exams, we'd spend maybe a couple of months going over old exam papers trying to work out what was likely to come up. This is totally on the teacher for being lazy. Don't set exams that any dumbass can find with five minutes googling.

It was always fun when people would try to use me to cheat in 300/500 history exams because it was like, uh... you have to read the book and no I am not going to give you a synopsis of my test paper that I'm going to write freehand. Ever.

because I never had a paper, I got drunk and high the night before and wrote it, then just kinda went for it from memory

PetraCore
Jul 20, 2017

👁️🔥👁️👁️👁️BE NOT👄AFRAID👁️👁️👁️🔥👁️

Play posted:

Speaking for myself I'd take any measure of physical pain over the existential horror of being trapped in your own broken mind
I get what you're saying and completely agree with why you're saying it, but isn't part of the existential horror that you might not notice anything is wrong or be distressed?

Play
Apr 25, 2006

Strong stroll for a mangy stray

PetraCore posted:

I get what you're saying and completely agree with why you're saying it, but isn't part of the existential horror that you might not notice anything is wrong or be distressed?

I suppose that's possible, although if you've known people with Alzheimer's you'll know that it's not all blissful ignorance and happy memories, to say the least.

I get what she's saying though, which is that her grandma's mind is still so sharp that it's unfortunate her body isn't able to hold up the same

kimbo305
Jun 9, 2007

actually, yeah, I am a little mad

PetraCore posted:

I get what you're saying and completely agree with why you're saying it, but isn't part of the existential horror that you might not notice anything is wrong or be distressed?

If you’re slipping into and out of full awareness and understanding, it’s worse for you and your loved ones. I knew someone who went for streaks of multiple days alternately knowing or not knowing that she had metastatic cancer. Toward the end, she barely understood why she had to take her meds. Lack of understanding doesn’t equate to lack of concern/distress.

1st_Panzer_Div.
May 11, 2005
Grimey Drawer

PHIZ KALIFA posted:

my wife got her advanced degree from the same institution and befriended the dude despite being in a different department. she hasn't seen him in a decade but they're interactive on FB so the expectation is it's someone in his department getting revenge, when the post says the video was distributed widely, they mean WIDELY.

like, if he gets fired, his entire professional community will know why.

edit- so, my wife befriended this dude because he is, again without getting too specific, an expert on the things that evolved into frogs. my wife wanted to study frog respiration, so she talked to him for the full evolutionary path for how dino snoots became frog snoots. that's how specific a field we're talking about.

How old is he in the video? This sounds like blackmail.

PHIZ KALIFA
Dec 21, 2011

#mood
neither of us saw enough of it to really say, and she's mad at me for some stuff today so i don't have the Spouse Points (TM) to ask her to dredge out the vid and let me watch it again.

i would be honestly surprised if it was blackmail, the dude just sounded really milquetoast and into dinosaurs and how bone scarring indicated the presence of ligature. tbh i assume he had an affair with whoever filmed the video and it went south. poor fella.

MarcusSA
Sep 23, 2007

Holy lol imagine filming a video of you jerking it to some Dinos for your S/O lmao.

Pvt.Scott
Feb 16, 2007

What God wants, God gets, God help us all

Sunswipe posted:

My GCSE maths teacher literally had us go through old GCSE exams in the run up to the real thing. I really don't know how you think this is cheating.

In my senior year of high school, I got to experience the very first year of MAP (Missouri Assessment Program). The teachers spent at least a month going over what would be on the tests, what kinds of questions they’d ask, the type of answers they expected etc. I lost a month of useful schooling (plus a week for the testing) because school budgets were tied to good MAP scores (this is a terrible idea). It wasn’t our teachers freaking out and trying to pad their scores for the budget; it was all MAP-provided training materials that were required instruction. God that month was loving miserable.

Pvt.Scott fucked around with this message at 00:30 on Oct 8, 2019

Scathach
Apr 4, 2011

You know that thing where you sleep on your arm funny and when you wake up it's all numb? Yeah that's my whole world right now.


The throught of someone cumming on mostly stegosaurs makes me sad. That's one of my favorite dinosaurs. I even have a stego sticker on my SUV. They don't deserve that :smith:

Also lol at the people ten or so pages back that don't understand how a person can be 2/5 of a genetic group.

Khanstant
Apr 5, 2007

The Bramble posted:

A new thread would be great, but let's give it a few days to compile some more GOAT links. Any new OP should have it as a guide to this thread.

Whoever remembered the dirt ball story is absolutely right that it needs to be in that list.

Edit: anyone taking a deep dive into this thread, it would be funny to have a list of all the notable, pages long derails we've endured and how many probations they've resulted in.

I spent like almost a year going through this thread from the start and it's just too much. A couple times I couldn't help myself and would back comment to some tangent or story from a gazillion pages in the past, but even by the time I'd get around to refreshing on the tab with my latest post there'd be 100new drat pages.

As I recall the majority of the derails were bickering with someone called Pick (anime avatar or something) and I learned a great deal of information about their personal life, which I've since forgotten and I haven't seen that picture in ages so they might not post here anymore. There were also a handful of people with, like, super garbage perspectives on everything but it seems like most of them eventually got their bans. Other than that it was the normal derails that wreck any good train, which more or less revolve around how everyone is gross, wrong, eats like poo poo, has bad taste, and can't even.

Pvt.Scott
Feb 16, 2007

What God wants, God gets, God help us all

Khanstant posted:

I spent like almost a year going through this thread from the start and it's just too much. A couple times I couldn't help myself and would back comment to some tangent or story from a gazillion pages in the past, but even by the time I'd get around to refreshing on the tab with my latest post there'd be 100new drat pages.

As I recall the majority of the derails were bickering with someone called Pick (anime avatar or something) and I learned a great deal of information about their personal life, which I've since forgotten and I haven't seen that picture in ages so they might not post here anymore. There were also a handful of people with, like, super garbage perspectives on everything but it seems like most of them eventually got their bans. Other than that it was the normal derails that wreck any good train, which more or less revolve around how everyone is gross, wrong, eats like poo poo, has bad taste, and can't even.

Worry not, Pick is eternal.

Bruceski
Aug 21, 2007

The tools of a hero mean nothing without a solid core.

Scathach posted:

Also lol at the people ten or so pages back that don't understand how a person can be 2/5 of a genetic group.

Clearly if somebody states their genetic lineage they're speaking exactly to three decimal places.

Pinecone Sample
Oct 12, 2010

THIS ACCOUNT HAS BEEN SEIZED
by the United States Federal Bureau of Investigation in accordance with a seizure warrant issued pursuant to 69 U.S.C Sec. 420
UPDATE I (36m) was falsely accused by my gf's (29f) son (7m) of molesting him and she won't accept I don't want to now be with her?

quote:


I want to thank you all your your advice, well wishes and criticism.

This is an update on 2 fronts.

Firstly, I met up with my gf. She rang me and and I answered and asked if we could meet Sunday night. Normally I'd not answer but because she had it from a withheld number and I was pissed, I said yeah alright.

When she came around, I was all set to be guns blazing and tell her to gently caress off. But when I saw her, I felt all emotional and broke down - she did too. We hugged really well, and she kept on saying how awful I looked and how much weight I'd lost.

She apologized and kept apologising profusely. She said she had to report me on the basis that her son looked so in distress and she couldn't not report it as a mother. But she said she in hindsight knew I wouldn't be capable of what he said I did, and she hasn't been sleeping or thinking straight of what I could be going through. Apparently once her so admitted to the police it wasn't me and it was his cousin, the police got a confession out if her nephew and he said he was molested himself so he was only doing what happened to him. I couldn't try and be all nice and understanding, and I said I couldn't give a gently caress - she seemed quite stunned by this, but as she could see I was really distressed she didn't argue the point.

Basically she said she wanted to know where we go from here and that she loved me so much and that she wanted to know if I could move on from it. She also had a letter from her son - basically he's been really poorly and he was so upset about what he said I'd did and asked if I'd read it.

I don't know what happened at this point, but I got really angry. I said I couldn't read his letter. She got all pissed and said that he's only a kid, and he's been struggling so much - did our little relationship mean so little to me? I felt so loving blind sided, and said that it wasn't my fault he accused me of being a Paedo. After a lot of arguing, raised voices and hurt feelings I said I'd take the letter but couldn't promise I'd want to reply - I mean his accusation is going to likely ruin my career. She said she was done at this point, but stressed how much she loved me and asked if I could ever forgive them. I said I couldn't promise. She also felt awful that I was likely losing my job the next day. We hugged it out, kissed and left it there.

On the subject of my work, it's bittersweet.

I arrived there for my meeting and briefly seeing my colleagues, they were treating me like poo poo. One woman who's been like my work mum and mentor, was looking down her nose instantly. I tried to talk to her and she just walked off mid conversation. Several others were all looking at me as if I'm the worst human being ever.

When I got into the meeting, it looked as if I was just going to be sacked and that was it. But I'm a pretty good negotiator, and I managed to beat them back to being not to blame at all. Basically, we argue a deal where I resign, but they agree to give me a great reference. They also pay me in full for September, October, and give me a £1000 "car bonus" so I can buy myself a car. I'm due to go in and formally accept this Thursday.

It's horrible because I've had to resign after 5 works of hard work and training, and cut ties with a place where I really gave it my all and I felt like I had a future. All because I've done nothing wrong.

Tldr me and my partner have talked, we're not in a good place and I'm out my job but have a decent reference.

Pinecone Sample
Oct 12, 2010

THIS ACCOUNT HAS BEEN SEIZED
by the United States Federal Bureau of Investigation in accordance with a seizure warrant issued pursuant to 69 U.S.C Sec. 420
I [F 28] am in a open marriage. Met someone [M 34] and am super confused

quote:

TL;DR: I [F 28] an in an open marriage because my husband [M 28] wanted time apart due to me hiding debt from him. Now I met someone and am really confused because I really like this guy.

I don't know how much background I should give in here, but I feel like it's important to have some notion of how this started. I have been married for two and a half years. I have serious self-image issues and I grew up being constantly called selfish.

A couple of years ago, I struggled with mental health and basically dealt with it by shopping. I got into debt and hid it from my husband [M 28]. He knew I was struggling, but he is a very hands-off kind of person. He doesn't like keeping track of things, he wants to have the least possible to worry or think about. So as I kept getting more into debt, I kept telling myself "I am going to pay for it and it will be ok". He has always been very averse to debt, and I knew that. When he found my credit card bill, he freaked out and was ready to leave me. But we talked and decided we would take time apart, and open our marriage. I moved across the country because being in the same town and not being able to spend time with him was going to be hard, so I didn't want to stay. I had a really rough time accepting the open marriage thing, but I felt like I messed up and I had to accept whatever it takes for us to fix our relationship.

It took me a bit to get out there and decide I wanted to meet people. I went on a few dates, met some people, slept with one, broke it off with him. And then I started chatting with this one guy [M 34]. We texted and texted constantly for a couple of weeks. He knows all about my situation and is very understanding. I said I need to take things slowly because I don't know what exactly is going on and where I am going with all this. We went on a first date and he was so great! And then we went on a second date, and from there we ended up coming to my place to see a movie. I asked him to stay over, he said he didn't expect me to want to do anything, but that he was happy to stay. He stayed, we didn't have sex. We spent the next day together and we had a really good time.

Never in my life, I have felt the level of care I feel from him. I know we have just spent time together technically twice, but we talk all day long. And I mean ALL DAY. We are constantly texting. At the beginning I was worried because I tend to quickly get close and then after I meet the person once or twice, I am bored. He went home yesterday and I am already counting the days to see him again.

My husband is coming to stay for a month between Thanksgiving and Christmas. And when I asked him to, I was lonely and missing him like crazy and couldn't wait for it. But now I feel like having him here for a month might be a mistake. I love my husband, I do. But meeting this new guy has made me wonder if my marriage is really all that there is...

Literally what did he think was going to happen to the debt or the marriage

I'm not comfortable with your financial situation, let's live in two separate places and gently caress other people but remain in a legal union

Danaru
Jun 5, 2012

何 ??

Pinecone Sample posted:

UPDATE I (36m) was falsely accused by my gf's (29f) son (7m) of molesting him and she won't accept I don't want to now be with her?


[quote]
She got all pissed and said that he's only a kid, and he's been struggling so much - did our little relationship mean so little to me? 

"Sure my son and I destroyed your life, career, and most of your professional contacts severed, but cant you make it work for ~the relationship~"

Beachcomber
May 21, 2007

Another day in paradise.


Slippery Tilde

Danaru posted:

"Sure my son and I destroyed your life, career, and most of your professional contacts severed, but cant you make it work for ~the relationship~"

If she and her son are so bloody apologetic, why didn't they make a tiny amount of effort to go into his place of work and cry/explain everything.

I also dgaf that Cousin Rapey was himself molested.

Barudak
May 7, 2007

A good negotiator is not "I got paid 3 months and got a reference" its "I keep my job, and you make a mandatory meeting for all staff explaining I was unjustly and wrongfully accused and that anyone who makes a disparaging remark is fired".

Noumena
Mar 18, 2008

Posted byu/ThrowRA09876345678

My(23F) boyfriend(25F) left me on the side of the road and I deserved it.

My amazing, beautiful boyfriend had decided to treat me to dinner since we'd both had long weeks. He was making me laugh and we were talking and having a really good time. After we were done we left, and we were about half way home when I asked him if we could stop and get some dessert. He said something like "Haha, didn't we just eat?" and keeps driving. My stupid, selfish self pushes it and says "C'mon, please? I want something sweet.", he replies that we have ice cream at home and continues driving. After that I kept on pushing it and pushing it and pushing it, and while he's being way more patient with me than I deserve, he's firm and says no. I give up, but then i see a fast food restaurant up the road and jokingly pull the wheel to go into the parking lot. Apparently I pulled harder than I thought because we actually ended up swerving, and hit another car lightly. To make things worse, he just bought this car. The driver motions for us to pull into the parking lot, and when we do he and my boyfriend get out, and the driver starts cussing him out and saying horrible things to him, even though there wasn't any damage to both the cars (the bumper has the littlest little dent on it, and the other car had no damage). They didn't even exchange any information. While he's being yelled at, I don't get out of the car and let him be punished for something I did. When he gets back in and starts driving, he's gripping the steering wheel so hard that the veins on his arms are popping out. His entire face is red and he hasn't said anything to me. To try and break the tension a little, I say "Well, that could've gone a lot worse." As soon as I say that, he stomps on the breaks and just tells me to get out of his sight, in the angriest voice imaginable. I've never felt afraid of him, but in that moment I did. He looked like he was struggling not to hurt me. I got out and he sped off. It was starting to get dark and I was in a stretch of woods. It took almost an hour for me to walk home, but when I got there him and all his stuff was gone.

I feel so horrible. I cant even apologize to him because he hasn't been responding to my calls and texts. We've had fights before about my childish quirks when they go a little bit too far, and now I don't have a boyfriend anymore because of it. I've been getting texts like "Wtf" and "What the hell is wrong with you" from our friends so I think he's told them what happened.

It seems like everybody's mad at me. Is there any way to fix this? How can I apologize to them when all our friends are siding with him

Barudak
May 7, 2007

The search for cognition in animals is a fascinating field of science but obviously extremely difficult and here there is the perfect research specimen that speaks English but has no mind.

Danaru
Jun 5, 2012

何 ??

Barudak posted:

A good negotiator is not "I got paid 3 months and got a reference" its "I keep my job, and you make a mandatory meeting for all staff explaining I was unjustly and wrongfully accused and that anyone who makes a disparaging remark is fired".

HR doesnt care whether he did it or not, just that the accusation might hurt their bottom line :capitalism:

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ParserGirl
Jun 3, 2005

Beachcomber posted:


I also dgaf that Cousin Rapey was himself molested.

You should.

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