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On Chesil Beach is not the most reprehensible film of the decade but it is a specific kind of self-pitying indulgence of melodrama with absolutely nothing to say much less show that its in there for me.
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Nov 6, 2019 02:50
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OpenSourceBurger posted:Another choice here: Megan is Missing. You've got to tell us what the exchange is now. Those are the rules.
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Nov 7, 2019 05:01
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Cacator posted:Speaking of aborted cinematic universes, the fact that they tried to pull this poo poo with Bond in Spectre was just insulting, especially since they tried to do it by retconning the previous movies while simultaneously pulling off a Star Trek Into Darkness style reveal for Blofeld. But no one gives a poo poo! Yeah Spectre was bad and such a terrible follow-up to Skyfall, which itself was essentially rebooting Bond already. Honestly most of my worst films of this decade were these stillborn attempts to jumpstart cinematic universes or reboot old franchises.
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Nov 7, 2019 09:23
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Snowman_McK posted:You've got to tell us what the exchange is now. Those are the rules. It's loving gross. The two girls are talking via webcams and IIRC they are discussing sexual experiences. Meghan (who the movie shows is the ~BAD GIRL~) describes (in very graphic, gross detail) being molested by a family friend. Her telling of those story is insane because she's talking like it's a joke, but the more insane part is her friend reacting by giggling and finding it hilarious. It's a completely out of nowhere scene and literally the only reason it's in the movie is for shock value. It's really hard to put into words how baffling it is. The entire film really needs to be seen to be fully understand it.
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Nov 7, 2019 19:23
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Barudak posted:On Chesil Beach is not the most reprehensible film of the decade but it is a specific kind of self-pitying indulgence of melodrama with absolutely nothing to say much less show that its in there for me. I'm curious about this one. I'm very skeptical of modern literary fiction so I always find it satisfying when a novel hyped by the New Yorker crowd gets a film adaptation that then gets absolutely poo poo on by the general public (see also: The Goldfinch, Where'd You Go Bernadette?)
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Nov 7, 2019 22:26
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Uncle Boogeyman posted:I'm curious about this one. I'm very skeptical of modern literary fiction so I always find it satisfying when a novel hyped by the New Yorker crowd gets a film adaptation that then gets absolutely poo poo on by the general public (see also: The Goldfinch, Where'd You Go Bernadette?) lol it was written by the guy who claimed science-fiction never tackled issues such as identity and what makes a person a person until he wrote his sci-fi novel.
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Nov 7, 2019 22:57
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OpenSourceBurger posted:It's loving gross. The two girls are talking via webcams and IIRC they are discussing sexual experiences. Meghan (who the movie shows is the ~BAD GIRL~) describes (in very graphic, gross detail) being molested by a family friend. Her telling of those story is insane because she's talking like it's a joke, but the more insane part is her friend reacting by giggling and finding it hilarious. It's a completely out of nowhere scene and literally the only reason it's in the movie is for shock value. Wow. I had no idea what the answer would be. This made me remember Gringo, which is a baffling, extremely dull movie. Watching it, you can kind of guess what the first draft might have been like, and that that might have actually been interesting and funny. What got made, though, is something aggressively generic and dull. Of all the weird decisions in the film, like how characters get told things, and then are surprised by them later (presumably late rewrites or something) there's one that stands out. Charlize Theron's sleazy ammoral business lady is discussing a merger with someone, quite late in the film, and we get this long, bizarre scene where she talks him into taking his dick out in the middle of a bar, with the merger between their companies depending on whether he has a good dick. loving hell what a terrible film.
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Nov 8, 2019 00:10
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OpenSourceBurger posted:It's loving gross. The two girls are talking via webcams and IIRC they are discussing sexual experiences. Meghan (who the movie shows is the ~BAD GIRL~) describes (in very graphic, gross detail) being molested by a family friend. Her telling of those story is insane because she's talking like it's a joke, but the more insane part is her friend reacting by giggling and finding it hilarious. It's a completely out of nowhere scene and literally the only reason it's in the movie is for shock value. Wasn't there an addendum to this that it was based on a conversation the writer heard between his daughter and a friend or something? I remember hearing it had a real life source and it made the scene ten times worse.
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Nov 8, 2019 06:19
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X-Ray Pecs posted:lol it was written by the guy who claimed science-fiction never tackled issues such as identity and what makes a person a person until he wrote his sci-fi novel. This explains so much about Chesil Beach
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Nov 8, 2019 07:18
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Das Boo posted:Wasn't there an addendum to this that it was based on a conversation the writer heard between his daughter and a friend or something? I remember hearing it had a real life source and it made the scene ten times worse. Yeah, YMS review of the film shows the director mentioned that which is utter loving madness and should have resulted in an arrest.
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Nov 8, 2019 12:31
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X-Ray Pecs posted:lol it was written by the guy who claimed science-fiction never tackled issues such as identity and what makes a person a person until he wrote his sci-fi novel. he also wrote trash favorite The Good Son with Evil Macaulay Culkin
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Nov 8, 2019 14:58
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Barudak posted:On Chesil Beach is not the most reprehensible film of the decade but it is a specific kind of self-pitying indulgence of melodrama with absolutely nothing to say much less show that its in there for me. I just looked up the plot summary and just LOLLLLL if they really try to play that ending super dramatically.
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Nov 8, 2019 15:36
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Uncle Boogeyman posted:I'm curious about this one. I'm very skeptical of modern literary fiction so I always find it satisfying when a novel hyped by the New Yorker crowd gets a film adaptation that then gets absolutely poo poo on by the general public (see also: The Goldfinch, Where'd You Go Bernadette?) "Self-pitying, indulgent melodrama" really is the perfect descriptor of 90%+ of modern book culture.
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Nov 8, 2019 18:47
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TrixRabbi posted:"Self-pitying, indulgent melodrama" really is the perfect descriptor of 90%+ of modern book culture. people who write soul searching personal essays about that time they interacted with a homeless person
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Nov 8, 2019 18:57
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TrixRabbi posted:"Self-pitying, indulgent melodrama" really is the perfect descriptor of 90%+ of modern book culture. james frey isn't a liar, he's a genius satirist years ahead of his time
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Nov 8, 2019 19:14
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Whoever nominated Beyond the Black Rainbow earlier: c'mon, man. Calling it a bad movie is like calling Koyaanisqatsi or Baraka a bad movie because there is no plot and nothing happens. Unrelated, but I watched Captain Marvel and after the movie I couldn't remember what it was about. Danvers crash lands on Earth, baddies try to find her but then they aren't the actual baddies and then something happens? Also after that (in subsequent movies) she has to show up and then bugger off somewhere else to avoid being the One Punch Woman in a world where Hawkeye is a legit hero?
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Nov 9, 2019 23:05
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cyberbug posted:Whoever nominated Beyond the Black Rainbow earlier: c'mon, man. Calling it a bad movie is like calling Koyaanisqatsi or Baraka a bad movie because there is no plot and nothing happens. I love Koyaanisqatsi, but watching Beyond The Black Rainbow was like watching paint dry.
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Nov 9, 2019 23:24
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OpenSourceBurger posted:A special mention for that Tyler Perry film that ends with a woman who cheater on her husband getting AIDS and it's treated as a moment of karmic justice. White paternalism is amazing, people try and cancel writers like Quentin Tarantino for writing characters that are obviously bad people saying and doing bad things but Tyler Perry does this or the movie about how the problem with juvenile delinquents is that their parents don't beat them enough and they all nod because it's just how Those People are. Inspector 34 posted:Lot of people talking poo poo about about Pacific Rim itt, and one person said our only point of reference for big rear end robots was this or that something, but I feel like you goddamn nerds have forgotten that Power Rangers was a thing and involved multiple pilots controlling a big rear end robot that smashed monsters. Maybe we didn't all watch anime or read mangas or whatever but we do still probably have some frame of reference for robots vs monsters and, for me at least, Pacific Rim kicks rear end. Pacific Rim was a movie about giant robot fights that has almost no giant robot fights. You get 30 seconds of two Giants wading in waist-deep water during a raging storm, an hour of boring training montages and adults acting like bitchy high school students, then another fight in a storm where all the robots but one are knocked out before it begins and then a.l finale on the bottom of the ocean in the middle of a dust cloud. It utterly failed at what it set out to do and is boring as poo poo. axelblaze posted:Charlie Day is also pretty good in it The sequel rules because, in addition to having more and more interesting fight scenes and having a cast of young people that are far more fitting to the dumb training academy melodrama the series is invested in, has Charlie Day chewing scenery as the alien-possessed villain.
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Nov 10, 2019 03:14
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Waffleman_ posted:Hollywood has been obsessed with "realistic" and "historical" takes on Robin Hood and King Arthur for 20 years. I wanna see a movie do King Arthur in the style of DC Comics' "true Camelot" from 8000 BC.   
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Nov 11, 2019 03:29
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I just realized that the Fate franchise has gotta be by far the most successful recent King Arthur take. Maybe that's where the other King Arthur movies have hosed up, they didn't have her fight Gilgamesh, Cu Culainn, or even Gilles De Rais
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Nov 11, 2019 03:54
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I really dig this art.
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Nov 11, 2019 12:24
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Gripweed posted:Oh god, that reminds me of another good contender; the Oldboy remake. No idea why, but this reminded me of the Hellboy reboot. Goddamn that was bad.
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Nov 11, 2019 22:20
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Gripweed posted:Oh god, that reminds me of another good contender; the Oldboy remake. why did spike lee make this film. it's real obvious he didn't give a single poo poo about this story. kind of seemed like he may have even actively hated it
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Nov 11, 2019 22:28
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Taintrunner posted:No idea why, but this reminded me of the Hellboy reboot. Goddamn that was bad. Yikes, that's a good example of a bad movie.
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Nov 11, 2019 22:40
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God Hole posted:why did spike lee make this film. it's real obvious he didn't give a single poo poo about this story. kind of seemed like he may have even actively hated it A lot of films get called pointless or unnecessary, but Oldboy really was. Spike Lee, as a film maker, has never been particularly interested in vengeance, so it's weird that he'd adapt one the best films on the subject. If he'd actually adapted it, and proceeded to do his own take on it from the ground up instead of rehashing Park's film, he might have done something good with it, but he didn't seem to care enough to do that.
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Nov 11, 2019 23:57
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General Dog posted:It absolutely achieves what it sets out to do in a masterful way; it's just the rare provocative movie where I'm, you know, provoked. It's Blasphemous with a capital "B", and not in a thoughtless or frivolous manner. (They can use that as a pull quote for the anniversary blu-ray.) mother! is like if Luis Bunuel had made a slasher
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Nov 12, 2019 00:22
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Oldboy also just came and went like a bad fart. It almost felt like Lee was contractually obligated to make it because I can't remember him even doing anything to hype it up. It just sorta came out and then everyone forgot it even existed. Nightmare on Elm Street reboot might not deserve it for being the absolute worst because there are some competent moments but holy gently caress is it the most boring slasher I've ever seen. They spend half the movie hinting and teasing that oh man was Freddy innocent? Are we going to change the core concept of Freddy and maybe go in an interesting direction with him? Nope not only was he guilty but he was also a pedo oh and for good measure we're gonna ramp that fun part of his backstory up because we have to remove any shred of fun out of the movie and replace it with devastatingly boring grim bullshit.
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Nov 12, 2019 14:45
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I do remember that Lee was apparently so upset by studio intervention in the Oldboy remake that he marked it as “A Spike Lee Film” instead of “A Spike Lee Joint” as a symbolic gesture, so I don’t think it’s that he didn’t care or want to.
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Nov 12, 2019 14:49
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Is there a nice write-up somewhere comparing Nightmare on Elmstreet old/new and why it's so bad? I don't know enough about the movies, but I keep seeing it come up in different topics here. Or if anyone would enjoy writing about it, I'd love to read it. For a contribution to the worst movies; Dirty Grandpa. Ugly, racist, sexist, unfunny, baffling. WHM has an episode dedicated to it for a good laugh. Link to their episodes: https://www.whmpodcast.com/whmprime Wild Hogs is a nice runner-up.
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Nov 12, 2019 15:22
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The Nightmare reboot is just a deeply boring movie. For all the poo poo the Friday the 13th one gets it at least feels like the makers caught the spirit and ideals behind it, the kills, the insanity of the concept, Jason's look. The whole thing feels like love and care was put into it. Nightmare though feels like they actively hated the entire franchise and wanted to remake it from scratch but had no good ideas of their own. The CG looks like poo poo compared to the practical effects of the original and this is coming from a guy who usually forgives CG. The kills are basic and have no imagination and that's a fatal error in a film where a huge chunk of the appeal is the imaginative kills and dream logic. Freddy's new actor tries his best with what he's given but what he's given is a bland creepy killer with unneeded pedo overtones added to him. The idea was always there but they wisely removed it and moved away from it in the series because it never fit the tone they had in the movies. Whereas here it just feels grimy and forced. There are good ideas in the movie, I love the micronaps idea and I think they had a really good idea with the whole "Innocent Freddy" thing but them chickening out and not going for it just felt like a giant cheat. There's just nothing there. It's a massive missed oppurtunity.
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Nov 12, 2019 15:34
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They redesigned Freddy to look like an actually burned person. Which, on top of being an obviously bad idea, it means that he can't emote at all.
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Nov 12, 2019 15:36
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Gripweed posted:They redesigned Freddy to look like an actually burned person. Which, on top of being an obviously bad idea, it means that he can't emote at all. No see dude we need to make this Freddy more realistic maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan not like those lame kiddified horror movies, we're here for the real poo poo
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Nov 12, 2019 15:38
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Dead Meat did an episode on the NoES remake (and every other movie in the franchise) which pretty succinctly covers what doesn’t make it work compared to the original.
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Nov 12, 2019 15:48
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Jackie Earl Hayley is really good at being menacing, so it says a lot about the film that him playing Freddie Kreuger isn't frightening in the slightest.
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Nov 12, 2019 16:32
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Crowetron posted:Jackie Earl Hayley is really good at being menacing, so it says a lot about the film that him playing Freddie Kreuger isn't frightening in the slightest. I will say his line read on the 'I haven't even cut you yet' scene is by far the most chilling line of the entire movie and it shows how loving hampered an awesome actor was by the movie's bullshit.
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Nov 12, 2019 16:35
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Snowman_McK posted:A lot of films get called pointless or unnecessary, but Oldboy really was. Spike Lee, as a film maker, has never been particularly interested in vengeance... I don't know about that at all but I'll assume you're making the (important) distinction between "vengeance" and "justice" at least. In a lot of his films, his message can still come off as quite vengeful viewed through a particular lens. Acht posted:Is there a nice write-up somewhere comparing Nightmare on Elmstreet old/new and why it's so bad? I don't know enough about the movies, but I keep seeing it come up in different topics here. Or if anyone would enjoy writing about it, I'd love to read it. Since you cited WHM, they did an episode on the NOES remake.
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Nov 13, 2019 00:22
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BiggerBoat posted:I don't know about that at all but I'll assume you're making the (important) distinction between "vengeance" and "justice" at least. In a lot of his films, his message can still come off as quite vengeful viewed through a particular lens. Fair point. I guess Oldboy is more about vengeance as a cinematic and narrative device. The trilogy it's part of (of which, impossibly, Oldboy is probably the weakest) is all a meditation on the pointlessness of it and a deliberate denial of catharsis. It's about vengeance films as much as the actual concept. Whereas Lee has never really been interested in the kind of meta-commentary that defines oldboy. Again, i'd love to see his take on the emptiness of revenge if you let him build it from the ground up, with only the most vestigial remnants of the original, like 'The Thing' and 'The Thing from Another World'
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Nov 13, 2019 01:44
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I'm honestly surprised the new NoES movie didn't take the opportunity to make Freddy a misunderstood victim of a lynch mob who turned into a vengeful wraith. There was already something severely wrong with Nancy's mom in the original, seems like it'd be a fun path to explore.
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Nov 14, 2019 06:19
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Das Boo posted:I'm honestly surprised the new NoES movie didn't take the opportunity to make Freddy a misunderstood victim of a lynch mob who turned into a vengeful wraith. There was already something severely wrong with Nancy's mom in the original, seems like it'd be a fun path to explore. For like 70% of the film it's moving very clearly in that direction but the director obviousy wussed out at the last minute and just went to the status quo. It's why the movie sucks so loving bad. It takes a very special bad movie to dangle a much better movie in your face and then snatch it away.
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Nov 14, 2019 18:19
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Snowman_McK posted:Spike Lee, as a film maker, has never been particularly interested in vengeance Inside Man has a pretty good revenge element
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Nov 14, 2019 20:09
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