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AITA for putting my foot down and not letting my pregnant wife have a home birth?quote:I'll just get right into it. So this has been a point of contention for us for a bit now and I need some outside perspective to see if i'm wrong..
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Nov 17, 2019 17:21
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Ghost Leviathan posted:I have heard of couples who are together for 10+ years who get married and divorce after like three months. Yeah but I'm willing to bet those couples weren't living together, doing everything together, getting mortgages together etc.
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Nov 17, 2019 17:25
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The longer I (15F) stay, the more I hate her (14F)quote:I know we’re kids. I know we’re really young, and relationships are normal, but i’m being absolutely suffocated by my girlfriend and I don’t know what to do. She’s clingy and dependent and NEEDS me of all people- an apathetic recluse- to literally not kill herself, and no matter what I do, she won’t let me go. She talks of marriage and potential sex in the future and I have no choice but to agree because if I don’t she’ll be upset. She says that this isn’t just a highschool fling, and that she’s in love with me, but I can’t loving take it because I don’t want a relationship. I care for her deeply; but I don’t love her. I just want to be by myself but she won’t let me, because I “saved her from herself,” and she “wants me and only me.” She won’t let me go. I don’t know what to do.
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Nov 17, 2019 17:30
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The only thing I can think of is she had a surprise abortion, recent sexual assault, or other trauma that she never told OP about, yeah. Otherwise it makes no sense that she immediately turned him down, then jetted off to be with her family and told absolutely no one what was actually going on, including the hospital she works at as a pediatrician... unless she's one of those meticulously crazy people who has to stick to a certain plan in her head and can never deviate from it, and marrying OP not her own terms blew it all up. I dunno. It's so weird.
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Nov 17, 2019 17:34
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Pinecone Sample posted:The longer I (15F) stay, the more I hate her (14F) Run away. Do not walk, run. This kid can see that poo poo is going to escalate, and the fact that this girl is using “it you leave I’ll off myself” as blackmail material already is super hosed.
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Nov 17, 2019 17:38
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Ugly In The Morning posted:Run away. Do not walk, run. This kid can see that poo poo is going to escalate, and the fact that this girl is using “it you leave I’ll off myself” as blackmail material already is super hosed. she needs to talk to her parents about transferring schools, even though that’s not fair at all. she is going to have to deal with literally constant emotional manipulation if she stays. there are 5 people in her class, including her and her “girlfriend”
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Nov 17, 2019 17:43
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It’s definitely guilt of some kind. Could be from cheating, could be from having mentally checked out of the relationship and being forced to face it, or could be for realizing she hates the idea of marrying the guy and not really knowing why.Pinecone Sample posted:The longer I (15F) stay, the more I hate her (14F) To quote the excellent latest season of Bojack Horseman, that’s not a relationship; that’s a hostage situation.
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Nov 17, 2019 17:45
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Ghost Leviathan posted:I have heard of couples who are together for 10+ years who get married and divorce after like three months. Marriage does something to people's brains where they expect to wake up and have a completely different life and relationship dynamic and are completely shocked when nothing changes. Its always "Oh it'll change once we're married" referring to everything from work, mix gender relationships, hobbies, leisure time, spending etc. There's a great YouTube video about divorce lawyers talking about divorce and they say the biggest issue they see from people is going in to a marriage and expecting major changes from their partner.
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Nov 17, 2019 17:45
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fauna posted:it's a curse No it's not, those are the best kinds of men.
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Nov 17, 2019 17:47
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My [26M] GF [25F] is mad at me for spending money on clothesquote:Throwaway, sorry for any spelling errors, I am on mobile. I have a feeling there's more to it than just the suit.
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Nov 17, 2019 17:48
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Pinecone Sample posted:The longer I (15F) stay, the more I hate her (14F) Freshman and Sophomores are very different beasts to begin with, but oi this particular girl.
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Nov 17, 2019 17:52
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500 euros is not a bad deal for a 5 piece suit, I hear.
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Nov 17, 2019 17:53
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WIBTA if I told my sister to move her “makeshift” taser to somewhere I can’t reach u/Amithemegaass13h quote:Throwaway because drat
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Nov 17, 2019 17:56
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Pinecone Sample posted:It doesn't really make sense to read it that way to me. I think there are just 2 sentences one after the other that are happening contemporaneously. The only part of the story not really passing the sniff test is the distinct lack of passive-aggressive sniping, alcohol abuse, and sordid affairs after the decision to resign oneself to staying together "because it's better this way"
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Nov 17, 2019 18:04
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Sagebrush posted:WIBTA if I told my sister to move her “makeshift” taser to somewhere I can’t reach Sister should marry that lady who pranked her husband by shocking him wire exposed wires from an outlet.
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Nov 17, 2019 18:11
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Am I [26F] allowed for still being upset that my ex [27M] tells people I cheated on him?quote:Throwaway.
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Nov 17, 2019 18:16
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Pinecone Sample posted:Am I [26F] allowed for still being upset that my ex [27M] tells people I cheated on him? lol this lady is delusional
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Nov 17, 2019 18:18
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Pinecone Sample posted:Am I [26F] allowed for still being upset that my ex [27M] tells people I cheated on him? a "monogamous break" otherwise known as a relationship How many of the really lovely ones like this are redpill bait anyway? none of them (at least no obvious ones) in the responses to this so far but jesus there are a lot of posts that just so coincidentally get brigaded Mister Olympus fucked around with this message at 18:21 on Nov 17, 2019 |
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Nov 17, 2019 18:18
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Pinecone Sample posted:A few days later I went to a bachelor party and hooked up with a guy. It was a mistake but it was kind off Tom’s fault, he made me so sad and I didn’t know how to react. It's truly amazing how cheaters manage to accuse their victim as the responsible party 99% of the time(the other 1% see nothing wrong with it at all) Mister Olympus posted:a "monogamous break" otherwise known as a relationship "I need to break up with you for a while, but we're not allowed to see someone else!" Immediately sees someone else. Good old royal we in action.
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Nov 17, 2019 18:35
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Mister Olympus posted:How many of the really lovely ones like this are redpill bait anyway? Most of them I hope. Its got the textbook abuser “look what you made me do” thing going dads friend steve fucked around with this message at 18:51 on Nov 17, 2019 |
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Nov 17, 2019 18:49
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fauna posted:i only ever fall in love with gay men and dead men Forever friendzoned. 
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Nov 17, 2019 18:49
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AITA for insulting a customer at my dad’s restaurant for making unsolicited suggestions about my hair? I (F 22) work part time at my father’s restaurant/deli as a cashier while I’m in school. I’m mixed, so my natural hair is very thick and curly textured and since I stopped keeping it in a protective style, I like to where it out in a semi Afro. One day, a frequent customer (an old man, probably around 70) says, “you are such a pretty girl, you shouldn’t wear your hair like that. You’d look much better if you went to a salon and gotten it straightened out”. I said back to him “maybe you should have some hair before you comment about mine”. He’s old, so he’s a bit bald. He called me rude and nasty, then flagged down my dad about it. I got in trouble but I refused to apologize. My dad has also commented on my hair before. I told the customer, “I’m not trying to make it about race but my dad is an older white guy as well, and I’m not white. My hair will never be straight unless I flat iron it”. But I’m not apologizing and I don’t feel bad about saying what I said.
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Nov 17, 2019 18:58
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I [28 M] found out that my fiancee [27 F] and her family disowned her younger sister [23 F] for getting cochlear implantsquote:I've been together with my fiancee for four years and we are currently set to get married this summer. I have trouble thinking of any major issues we have had in our time together prior to this incident and we have lived together during very personal stressful times (grad school and a cancer scare on my end), so I think that meant something.
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Nov 17, 2019 18:59
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chemtrail huffer posted:I [28 M] found out that my fiancee [27 F] and her family disowned her younger sister [23 F] for getting cochlear implants I think the problem is, that he now has a VERY good idea who they are.
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Nov 17, 2019 19:05
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chemtrail huffer posted:I [28 M] found out that my fiancee [27 F] and her family disowned her younger sister [23 F] for getting cochlear implants You definitely should. That is incredibly hosed up of them.
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Nov 17, 2019 19:14
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I'm a little behind but daaaaamn, that 16-year sham marriage guy is cold. Think about all the benefits he got out of that poo poo show: no child support, no child care costs, a woman who was desperate to get back on his good side that he could regularly gently caress and she probably also did most or all of the household cleaning and chores. Then at the end of it, when there's no danger of him having to give anybody money, he leaves her destitute, with an empty resume and past her best years to have children. This is strongly reminding me of an episode of some old b&w anthology show (Twilight Zone or Alfred Hitchcock Presents, maybe). Anybody know what I'm talking about? My memory is hazy, but I think a woman betrayed a man in some way, then he acted like he forgave her and helped her build a beautiful life and get back on top of things again. The last scene was him asking her if she was happy, and she was--the happiest she'd ever been--and then he reminded her of the betrayal and...killed her? I think? I mostly remember that he was very clear that he waited till she was happy before he hosed her over. artsy fartsy fucked around with this message at 19:21 on Nov 17, 2019 |
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Nov 17, 2019 19:17
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chemtrail huffer posted:I [28 M] found out that my fiancee [27 F] and her family disowned her younger sister [23 F] for getting cochlear implants It's good that you found this out now instead of later when you tried to encourage your own kid to get a wicked dope ear implant shaped like a gramophone horn. I can't stand people that discriminate against cyborgs and augmentators. Why deny the weakness of the flesh? Why avoid the power of stainless steel and carbon fiber? Bioelectrical advances have enabled us to leave behind the primitive trappings of bioelectrochemistry. We can see farther, run faster, and take more drugs than ever before.  from these luddites and embrace the advancements that are on offer for you.
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Nov 17, 2019 19:19
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Disowning my daughter for getting glasses brb
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Nov 17, 2019 19:26
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We were on a breeaak
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Nov 17, 2019 19:29
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Cat Army
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artsy fartsy posted:Think about all the benefits he got out of that poo poo show: no child support, no child care costs. What? Kids are free if you stick together?
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Nov 17, 2019 19:33
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Admiral Ray posted:It's good that you found this out now instead of later when you tried to encourage your own kid to get a wicked dope ear implant shaped like a gramophone horn. I can't stand people that discriminate against cyborgs and augmentators. Why deny the weakness of the flesh? Why avoid the power of stainless steel and carbon fiber? Bioelectrical advances have enabled us to leave behind the primitive trappings of bioelectrochemistry. We can see farther, run faster, and take more drugs than ever before. Capital D- Deaf culture is really insular and sees things like cochlear implants as a way to erase them. They’re really against giving their kids a way to work around their handicap if it makes them different from them.
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Nov 17, 2019 19:41
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datajugend posted:What? Kids are free if you stick together? She was a stay at home mom, so no need to pay for child care, which would probably have happened if they divorced and she was working
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Nov 17, 2019 19:42
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datajugend posted:What? Kids are free if you stick together? Apparently you weren't around for Reagan https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Welfare_queen
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Nov 17, 2019 19:43
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artsy fartsy posted:I'm a little behind but daaaaamn, that 16-year sham marriage guy is cold. Do you...do you think if a parent lives in the same house as a child money to pay for their needs just falls out of the sky?
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Nov 17, 2019 19:44
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Ugly In The Morning posted:Capital D- Deaf culture is really insular and sees things like cochlear implants as a way to erase them. They’re really against giving their kids a way to work around their handicap if it makes them different from them.
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Nov 17, 2019 19:48
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DragQueenofAngmar posted:She was a stay at home mom, so no need to pay for child care, which would probably have happened if they divorced and she was working Wait she was? I must have missed that. Choosing to be a stay at Home mom for 16 years after he says he is only in this for the kid, thats a drat big gamble
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Nov 17, 2019 19:49
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DragQueenofAngmar posted:She was a stay at home mom, so no need to pay for child care, which would probably have happened if they divorced and she was working That doesn't mean what he did wasn't hosed up emotionally, and it's possible they both ended up worse off financially too.
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Nov 17, 2019 19:50
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datajugend posted:What? Kids are free if you stick together? Yes, exactly!  For real though, if they had broken up right after the cheating incident he'd potentially on the hook for child support, and if they split custody of the child he'd have to work out some kind of childcare during the times when he was at work. He'd also have to do his own household chores, or hire someone to do them for him. He didn't stay in that marriage for the sake of the kid. That's what he told her, and maybe that's even what he told himself, but he really stayed because he wanted to punish her as much as possible. Splitting up, giving her part of his paycheck every month and her potentially moving on and finding happiness with someone else wasn't punishment. He strung her along, used her for sex and childcare and dumped her the very day it was convenient for him to do so. (I am making some assumptions here--maybe he begged her to get a full-time job or go back to school after the kid was a little older and she just refused--but you have to fill in some of the gaps in these stories since we almost never get both sides.)
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Nov 17, 2019 19:52
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Joe Bogan posted:Do you...do you think if a parent lives in the same house as a child money to pay for their needs just falls out of the sky? Sorry, when I said "child care costs" I meant hiring a babysitter or putting the kid in daycare. I understand that can get real pricey.
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Nov 17, 2019 19:53
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Peaceful Anarchy posted:On the other hand he was paying for her living costs, and all of the kid's, and from her account she was happy enough in the relationship that he wasn't overtly controlling with money or her time. I really doubt he derived financial benefit from this over breaking up in his early 20s with what was almost certainly low income and having to pay child support. He's almost certainly going to have to give her half their savings too, or close to it. Not putting a ring on it doesn't absolve him of financial responsibility. yeah I think what he did was hosed up and she can probably get support from him now even though they weren’t married, I was just clarifying what I thought was meant by “no childcare costs”
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Nov 17, 2019 19:57
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