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trilobite terror
Oct 20, 2007
BUT MY LIVELIHOOD DEPENDS ON THE FORUMS!

Bar Ran Dun posted:

Working on a mega yacht can range from well compensated and mellow to unbelievably awful. Like abused indentured worker in Dubai level awful.

Believe me I know, my last two exes were sailors.

I was more referring to the stream-of-consciousness petit mal seizure that IP seemed to be having while writing about it.

OJ MIST 2 THE DICK posted:

getting laid is what got us 8chan to begin with


at the very least his impetus for redemption is "doesnt want to go down having indirectly inspired a wave of worse killers and ignore it"

Yes, but specifically he got laid (which, to his credit, is not as much of a simple given as for most due to his medical situation) and that was apparently the straw that broke the camel’s back with the 8chan hoi polloi.

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Otteration
Jan 4, 2014

I CAN'T SAY PRESIDENT DONALD JOHN TRUMP'S NAME BECAUSE HE'S LIKE THAT GUY FROM HARRY POTTER AND I'M AFRAID I'LL SUMMON HIM. DONALD JOHN TRUMP. YOUR FAVORITE PRESIDENT.
OUR 47TH PRESIDENT AFTER THE ONE WHO SHOWERS WITH HIS DAUGHTER DIES
Grimey Drawer

The answer is yes.

Check your seams, Rasmussen, they might be coming apart.

Edited to more match the colloquialism.

Otteration fucked around with this message at 02:42 on Nov 18, 2019

Otteration
Jan 4, 2014

I CAN'T SAY PRESIDENT DONALD JOHN TRUMP'S NAME BECAUSE HE'S LIKE THAT GUY FROM HARRY POTTER AND I'M AFRAID I'LL SUMMON HIM. DONALD JOHN TRUMP. YOUR FAVORITE PRESIDENT.
OUR 47TH PRESIDENT AFTER THE ONE WHO SHOWERS WITH HIS DAUGHTER DIES
Grimey Drawer

Phobic Nest posted:

I think their delusion is less Weekend at Bernie's and more Dave.

But man, imagine the task of finding a believable body double to impersonate Trump. Like, there are good enough actors to fill the role but getting someone to look just like him in those sweaty, you can see the pores shots... :stonk:

But my delusion fanfic is more fun. :)

FizFashizzle
Mar 30, 2005







BarbarianElephant posted:

This is why it was so easy to believe the "Clinton is dying" hoax. Sure, she just had a little "cough" - oh, right that cough is now "pneumonia" and she passed out. Is this going to keep developing?

I mean women hillary's age pass out all the time. that's nothing.

Zoph
Sep 12, 2005

https://twitter.com/JonLemire/status/1196212773014900736

orange man dead

Otteration
Jan 4, 2014

I CAN'T SAY PRESIDENT DONALD JOHN TRUMP'S NAME BECAUSE HE'S LIKE THAT GUY FROM HARRY POTTER AND I'M AFRAID I'LL SUMMON HIM. DONALD JOHN TRUMP. YOUR FAVORITE PRESIDENT.
OUR 47TH PRESIDENT AFTER THE ONE WHO SHOWERS WITH HIS DAUGHTER DIES
Grimey Drawer

Zophar posted:

orange man dead

Kitten lives:
https://i.imgur.com/TQwxuIs.mp4

Edit: kitten kills orange dogge:
https://i.imgur.com/181nFnV.mp4

(It's tax makeup day.)

Otteration fucked around with this message at 02:49 on Nov 18, 2019

Dave Grool
Oct 21, 2008



Grimey Drawer
Prepare for the seeing the spectre of death will temper trump takes

killer crane
Dec 30, 2006

THUNDERDOME LOSER 2019

Zophar posted:

orange man dead

its either:
1. dead/dying/extremely broken
2. pretending to be so that he can get attention away from impeachment, and then ask for sympathy, cause the democrats are literally killing him.
3. pretending so he can leave office, not go to court cause his drs say he's too sick, and also look like he quit cause of health and not because he's a huge failure.

Pinecone Sample
Oct 12, 2010

THIS ACCOUNT HAS BEEN SEIZED
by the United States Federal Bureau of Investigation in accordance with a seizure warrant issued pursuant to 69 U.S.C Sec. 420
Average brain: The folder contained his EKG results

Expanding brain: The folder was to obscure a handheld monitor attached to his chest

Galaxy brain: The folder was clearly labeled "my very big important VA hospital decision (that's why I'm going there)" but he was holding it facing the wrong way

FlamingLiberal
Jan 18, 2009

Would you like to play a game?



Pinecone Sample posted:

Average brain: The folder contained his EKG results

Expanding brain: The folder was to obscure a handheld monitor attached to his chest

Galaxy brain: The folder was clearly labeled "my very big important VA hospital decision (that's why I'm going there)" but he was holding it facing the wrong way
Universe Brain: The folder had a bunch of blank paper in it

Fritz Coldcockin
Nov 7, 2005

killer crane posted:

its either:
1. dead/dying/extremely broken
2. pretending to be so that he can get attention away from impeachment, and then ask for sympathy, cause the democrats are literally killing him.
3. pretending so he can leave office, not go to court cause his drs say he's too sick, and also look like he quit cause of health and not because he's a huge failure.

2 and 3 are ascribing an extraordinary amount of cunning, organization, and foresight to Trump and his band of Keystone Kops.

Spite
Jul 27, 2001

Small chance of that...
5 year olds pretend to be sick to get out of doing things they want to do. Would it really be that surprising for team trump to start laying the groundwork for a medical resignation?

Otteration
Jan 4, 2014

I CAN'T SAY PRESIDENT DONALD JOHN TRUMP'S NAME BECAUSE HE'S LIKE THAT GUY FROM HARRY POTTER AND I'M AFRAID I'LL SUMMON HIM. DONALD JOHN TRUMP. YOUR FAVORITE PRESIDENT.
OUR 47TH PRESIDENT AFTER THE ONE WHO SHOWERS WITH HIS DAUGHTER DIES
Grimey Drawer

FlamingLiberal posted:

Universe Brain: The folder had a bunch of blank paper in it

Torn up, half eaten, crumpled blank paper.

Pollyanna
Mar 5, 2005

Milk's on them.


I cannot loving wait to see how this shakes out. Turmop stroking out over the investigation is :allears:

Zoph
Sep 12, 2005

Spite posted:

5 year olds pretend to be sick to get out of doing things they want to do. Would it really be that surprising for team trump to start laying the groundwork for a medical resignation?

He has New York state charges lined up for him so a medical resignation would be like dropping him off at the prison gates.

BarbarianElephant
Feb 12, 2015
The fairy of forgiveness has removed your red text.

Zophar posted:

He has New York state charges lined up for him so a medical resignation would be like dropping him off at the prison gates.

How cruel liberals can be! Hounding a sick, frail old man! For shame!

Tibalt
May 14, 2017

What, drawn, and talk of peace! I hate the word, As I hate hell, all Montagues, and thee

BarbarianElephant posted:

How cruel liberals can be! Hounding a sick, frail old man! For shame!
*the sound of sad balloon deflating echoes across a New York court room. The one man in a Deere trucker helmet purses his lips and shakes his head.*

Goatse James Bond
Mar 28, 2010

If you see me posting please remind me that I have Charlie Work in the reports forum to do instead

Prester Jane posted:

I would like to invite each poster who insisted that the child separation program had either been ended or severely curtailed to reconsider some things- because migrant child detensions are up 42% year-over-year

"migrant child detentions are up" is not a particularly useful metric to assert "child separations are up / not curtailed"

article-relevant statistic:

quote:

U.S. immigration authorities have separated more than 5,400 children from their parents at the Mexico border, before, during and after a controversial “zero tolerance” policy was enacted and then ended in the spring of 2018.

this is both astonishingly horrific and also much smaller than Actual Unaccompanied Children numbers

which are also horrific, but in a different way and not what you're implying, and you've spent years assuming nobody will contradict you on any of your Apocalyptic Struggle Between Good And Evil assertions because saying things aren't as awful as you assert opens people up to sounding like assholes


huh

I AM GRANDO
Aug 20, 2006

Is that pool the press pool or the swimming pool?

Pollyanna
Mar 5, 2005

Milk's on them.



Does that mean something?

Pinecone Sample
Oct 12, 2010

THIS ACCOUNT HAS BEEN SEIZED
by the United States Federal Bureau of Investigation in accordance with a seizure warrant issued pursuant to 69 U.S.C Sec. 420

BarbarianElephant posted:

How cruel liberals can be! Hounding a sick, frail old man! For shame!

The Uncle Leo defense

ImpAtom
May 24, 2007

I wouldn't be surprised if he had a heart thing and is recovering. I kind of hope it is nothing more serious than that because I don't want him to be a Martyr

Goatse James Bond
Mar 28, 2010

If you see me posting please remind me that I have Charlie Work in the reports forum to do instead

Pollyanna posted:

Does that mean something?

it's slightly peculiar


ImpAtom posted:

I wouldn't be surprised if he had a heart thing and is recovering. I kind of hope it is nothing more serious than that because I don't want him to be a Martyr

yeah "some sort of temporarily incapacitating health event" is waaaay more likely than "they're not announcing the president is ded / in a coma"

BarbarianElephant
Feb 12, 2015
The fairy of forgiveness has removed your red text.

ImpAtom posted:

I wouldn't be surprised if he had a heart thing and is recovering. I kind of hope it is nothing more serious than that because I don't want him to be a Martyr

If he did have a Bernie then it gives him a good excuse to resign while saving face and getting the same pardon Nixon got.

Admiral
Dec 14, 2000

If you see this man, slap him in the nuts for me.

FizFashizzle posted:

That's angina.

Must be revenge for all the tarrifs!

Violator
May 15, 2003


Admiral posted:

Must be revenge for all the tarrifs!

:aaaaa:

Doctor Teeth
Sep 12, 2008


Pollyanna posted:

I cannot loving wait to see how this shakes out. Turmop stroking out over the investigation is :allears:

this mfer said Turmop

Otteration
Jan 4, 2014

I CAN'T SAY PRESIDENT DONALD JOHN TRUMP'S NAME BECAUSE HE'S LIKE THAT GUY FROM HARRY POTTER AND I'M AFRAID I'LL SUMMON HIM. DONALD JOHN TRUMP. YOUR FAVORITE PRESIDENT.
OUR 47TH PRESIDENT AFTER THE ONE WHO SHOWERS WITH HIS DAUGHTER DIES
Grimey Drawer

Pollyanna posted:

Does that mean something?

Not until it does.

Edit: The orange fecal smear's schedule doesn't mean anything until we know more. Other than for comedy points. :)

Otteration fucked around with this message at 03:18 on Nov 18, 2019

TulliusCicero
Jul 29, 2017




If only

LeeMajors
Jan 20, 2005

I've gotta stop fantasizing about Lee Majors...
Ah, one more!


The idea of Trump dying of an MI at the first real adversity in his loving cushy, silverspoon failson-rear end life is just too perfect to actually happen.

DeeplyConcerned
Apr 29, 2008

I can fit 3 whole bud light cans now, ask me how!

Dammerung posted:

Both, really. He's not supposed to do it, and it, like everything else he does and is not supposed to do, might be and usually is endorsed as the straw that will break the camel's back.


I'm not really sure if Obama's trying to endorse Biden or what specifically he is trying to do aside from minimizing the rising stars of the party.


Preserve his legacy. If we pass something better than the ACA suddenly his flagship achievement starts to look like the halfway compromise it really is.

Fister Roboto
Feb 21, 2008

If Trump had a serious or even minor health issue, they would never ever disclose it. Remember he has perfect genes, the best genes, and not being in perfect health would be an enormous sign of weakness to the people who want him to be an immortal god-emperor.

LeeMajors
Jan 20, 2005

I've gotta stop fantasizing about Lee Majors...
Ah, one more!


Fister Roboto posted:

If Trump had a serious or even minor health issue, they would never ever disclose it. Remember he has perfect genes, the best genes, and not being in perfect health would be an enormous sign of weakness to the people who want him to be an immortal god-emperor.

The man is profoundly obese and they want us to believe he is sub 240.

It is legitimately Supreme Leader Shoots 18 in Round of Golf territory. Do not believe your eyes and ears. That poo poo started on day 1.

I don't even know what they'd do if he suffered a massive crippling stroke. I'm too scared to even think about it.

CAPS LOCK BROKEN
Feb 1, 2006

by Fluffdaddy

Fister Roboto posted:

If Trump had a serious or even minor health issue, they would never ever disclose it. Remember he has perfect genes, the best genes, and not being in perfect health would be an enormous sign of weakness to the people who want him to be an immortal god-emperor.

It's not a good idea from a national security standpoint either, which is why FDR's polio was downplayed and JFK's tranquilizer and opioid use was kept out of the papers until well after his death:

quote:

By the time he was president, he was on ten, 12 medications a day. He was on antispasmodics for his bowel, paregoric, lamodal transatine [ph], he was on muscle relaxants, Phenobarbital, Librium, Meprobomate, he was on pain medications, Codeine, Demerol, Methadone, he was on oral cortisone; he was on injected cortisone, he was on testosterone, he was on Nembutal for sleep. And on top of that he was getting injected sometimes six times a day, six places on his back, by the White House physician, with Novocain, Procaine, just to enable him to face the day.

Otteration
Jan 4, 2014

I CAN'T SAY PRESIDENT DONALD JOHN TRUMP'S NAME BECAUSE HE'S LIKE THAT GUY FROM HARRY POTTER AND I'M AFRAID I'LL SUMMON HIM. DONALD JOHN TRUMP. YOUR FAVORITE PRESIDENT.
OUR 47TH PRESIDENT AFTER THE ONE WHO SHOWERS WITH HIS DAUGHTER DIES
Grimey Drawer
https://www.washingtonpost.com/history/2019/11/16/like-chasing-shadows-uncovering-colonial-williamsburgs-lgbtq-history/
washingtonpost.com/November 16, 2019
"Other historical sites have faced backlash recently for grappling with topics some visitors see as polarizing. At Monticello, Mount Vernon and other plantations, they have complained about staff efforts to speak more honestly about slavery."

Dear Disgruntled White Plantation Visitors, Sit Down.
afroculinaria.com/August 9, 2019
"Dear Disgruntled White Plantation Visitors,"
....
"My personal favorite was when I spilled some of the contents of a heavy pot of water as the light was dying and you all laughed and one of you said…and I could hear you…”This boy doesn’t know what he’s doing.”

“Boy.”

I was exhausted. I had been cooking over an open hearth for 7 hours. One enslaved cook in Martinique was thrown alive into an oven for burning a cake. How do we know? His mistress calmly showed his charred remains to her guest after the meal. Spilling or burning food could have meant my rear end."

sexpig by night
Sep 8, 2011

by Azathoth
trump dead so what

FlamingLiberal
Jan 18, 2009

Would you like to play a game?



Reading about JFK's medical issues and drug problems, I'm amazed he was able to function

TulliusCicero
Jul 29, 2017



sexpig by night posted:

trump dead so what

:hmmyes:

On the slim chance it happens and it comes out tonight or tomorrow I'm calling off for a week and just partying. We should declare a national holiday

gently caress make it an International one

oxsnard
Oct 8, 2003
so is donald dead or nah?

is he tweeting from beyond the grave?

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Hunt11
Jul 24, 2013

Grimey Drawer

Otteration posted:

Dear Disgruntled White Plantation Visitors, Sit Down.
afroculinaria.com/August 9, 2019
"Dear Disgruntled White Plantation Visitors,"
....
"My personal favorite was when I spilled some of the contents of a heavy pot of water as the light was dying and you all laughed and one of you said…and I could hear you…”This boy doesn’t know what he’s doing.”

“Boy.”

I was exhausted. I had been cooking over an open hearth for 7 hours. One enslaved cook in Martinique was thrown alive into an oven for burning a cake. How do we know? His mistress calmly showed his charred remains to her guest after the meal. Spilling or burning food could have meant my rear end."

I didn't know I could still get surprised by just how hosed up slavery could get in the US.

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