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btw it is literally true that regular masturbation to ejaculation reduces the onset of prostate cancer significantly -- something like a 40% decrease among men who honk it once a day vs. those who never do
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Dec 10, 2019 06:06
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Yeah this generation of dudes is going to have record low levels of prostate cancer because of jackin' it.
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Dec 10, 2019 06:07
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awesome im sitting on a 240% decrease
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Dec 10, 2019 06:07
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Sagebrush posted:a 40% decrease among men who honk it once a day vs. those who never do im imagining an alternate reality where the fappy sound is replaced with an air can honk soind
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Dec 10, 2019 06:16
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Did he say he made a deece six figgies
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Dec 10, 2019 06:20
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Crazy dude who doesn't touch his dick also did the thing that everyone who is way too attached to a point or ideology do where they just assume everyone is like them. Like the whole "you know how you can't jerk it to anything but videos anymore" lol I can jerk it to a faint memory of a butt I probably imagined in a fever dream. Also I guess I'll take a regular mountain dew if you don't have diet.
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Dec 10, 2019 06:22
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Memento posted:And it's definitely going to lead to a banme post. This dude has just literally shitcanned a decade of posting on these (dead, gay) forums because he couldn't let go of some dumb rear end ideas about masturbation and motivation and his best source for them is your brain on porn dot com. you: smug, content, huge biceps
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Dec 10, 2019 06:30
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Amateur Saboteur posted:me: unhinged, in tears, posting legacy annihilated, loaded with cancer Nahh, I've always had trouble putting on mass on my upper body Maybe I should try not jacking it for a while, I hear from some very reputable sources that that's good for you
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Dec 10, 2019 06:33
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When it comes to socialist cum magic, however, you are required to give it to them.
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Dec 10, 2019 06:40
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Look, maybe you dorks don't care about your health, but think about the crystals. You have to keep those JO crystals charged. Title XVII makes it crime to not keep your JO crystals charged, set by precedent in the case of Franklin v. MILF Anal-Assassins Vol 13.
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Dec 10, 2019 06:41
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They're not going to hand it to themselves
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Dec 10, 2019 06:48
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MizPiz posted:When it comes to socialist cum magic, however, you are required to give it to them. alls im saying is we can all check out into total recall style VR cum pods after the revolution do not operate a guillotine while masturbating there are terrible consequences.
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Dec 10, 2019 06:52
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I remember when this thread used to make me laugh for different reasons.
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Dec 10, 2019 06:59
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chitoryu12 posted:Volcels are stupid fucks, is how. but how can I be stupid when I make six loving figures, of money this entire shitshow is hardly a derail, since precious male essence is (an incredibly funny) meme itself
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Dec 10, 2019 07:00
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Code Jockey posted:but how can I be stupid when I make six loving figures, of money batman superman me none of us cum, youve never seen it happen
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Dec 10, 2019 07:07
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Amateur Saboteur posted:volcel are the strongest characters in the christopher nolan cinematic universe: can you really not jack off without porn?
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Dec 10, 2019 07:20
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Gum posted:can you really not jack off without porn? i dont actually identify as volcel, though i am socialist to the bone, and it doesnt make me upset that people pulverize their dicks constantly. porn reduction, meditation, and i guess lifting weights sometimes have just improved my life so dramatically that i can't help but spread the good news of my lord jesus christ to the unwashed masses, despite inevitable crucifixion. (i've done this in like 3 threads already before). have a great life goons, i've been at work this entire time getting paid fat money, but i really should finish this report. watch an especially juicy rear end for me as i will not. VVV I was on welbutrin, and it was incredibly numbing. Haven't taken a psych med since. Honestly upregulating your dopamine receptors just makes everything feel great. Everything's more beautiful. I found myself watching a dang ant walk across the sidewalk for like 10 minutes. It's like how food taste better when you're actually hungry. But, Sorry for the derail. Amateur Saboteur has a new favorite as of 07:47 on Dec 10, 2019 |
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Dec 10, 2019 07:34
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Mr. Fix It posted:i'm sorry you were depressed and are now replacing that depression with weird thoughts about jerkin' it. i guess replacing your weird obsession with bustin' daily with a weird obsession with not bustin' daily is an improvement for you, but your magical thinking that it's the source of your "success" is bad. He could have taken antidepressants instead, but then his dick probably wouldn't work at all, meat person or no meat person.
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Dec 10, 2019 07:41
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People who are addicted to porn = usually see a difference in their lives when they stop watching porn all the time and stop tugging at their poor penis 4x a day The rest of the world = won't notice a difference if they stop cumming except they'll get hornier
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Dec 10, 2019 07:52
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forget cumwaa
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Dec 10, 2019 07:54
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Sagebrush posted:btw it is literally true that regular masturbation to ejaculation reduces the onset of prostate cancer significantly -- something like a 40% decrease among men who honk it once a day vs. those who never do I will take this as a challenge and become functionally immune to prostate cancer, just to prove the naysayers wrong.
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Dec 10, 2019 07:56
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Where's the memes All I see is the sad man who thinks 6 figgies is fat pay lmao
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Dec 10, 2019 08:02
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here, let's segue 
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Dec 10, 2019 08:17
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oh my loving god shut the gently caress up jesus, I need to cleanse the thread or some poo poo. Here:       
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Dec 10, 2019 08:20
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MotU posted:awesome im sitting on a 240% decrease You tend to get diminishing returns when you jack off more than once a day. Quote unrelated.
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Dec 10, 2019 08:20
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Counterpoint to the volcel. Bustin makes me feel good.
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Dec 10, 2019 09:29
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:whatsgoingoninthisthreadohlawd: Man the internet really broke some people's brains, it never ceases to amaze me. Right before checking out the meme thread I read an article about neo-puritan alt-righters that sincerely believe busting a nut lowers your power level (just like our "volcel" here) and that porn is a conspiracy by (((them))) to keep your power level low, also lgtbq+ are bad for the same reason (?)  Sorry for the derail, I'm gonna crank it to prevent prostate cancer before going back to my >6 figure job and my loving wife 
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Dec 10, 2019 09:42
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alexandriao posted:im imagining an alternate reality where the fappy sound is replaced with an air can honk soind if i ever meet a really weird genie (or a normal one and i have a wish to burn i guess) i'm gonna wish that when i nut it sounds like the wastegate in a turbocharged car engine.
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Dec 10, 2019 10:11
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 in other news:        https://twitter.com/mememenome/status/1203041884056145921 
Sestze has a new favorite as of 10:25 on Dec 10, 2019 |
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Dec 10, 2019 10:13
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One glass of wine daily lowers your chance of heart failure by 2%. So does a shot of port. And a bottle of beer is good for your gut flora. That's why I choose to be an alcoholic, personally. Iam really conerned about my healh
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Dec 10, 2019 10:41
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Dec 10, 2019 12:32
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This just reminds me of stocktales. https://youtu.be/WXIoWp92ux8
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Dec 10, 2019 12:37
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Son of Thunderbeast posted:
Still thinkin bout that clussy
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Dec 10, 2019 13:39
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Just Offscreen posted:This just reminds me of stocktales. Lol at Russian subtitles on this one.
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Dec 10, 2019 13:48
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ranbo das posted:Like the whole "you know how you can't jerk it to anything but videos anymore" lol I can jerk it to a faint memory of a butt I probably imagined in a fever dream. LOL, just LOL, if in TYOOL 2019 you're not so much of a demented internet fetish pervert that you are forced to rely on your imagination because no one has, will, or could ever make porn of the things that get you off anymore. Like, get on my level. Two other things: 1: P. Sure the nazis don't want dudes jerkin' cause they think sexually frustrated internet loners are easier to radicalize than ones who arent. 2: Only thing that makes me think this guy isn't Jon Pop is the age of the account. It'd be a crazy amount of time to keep a parachute hidden.
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Dec 10, 2019 14:22
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Obvious joke from the first post, but goons gotta goon 
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Dec 10, 2019 14:30
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Amateur Saboteur posted:my ideas are lived. I used to bust daily, then i stopped and i got a lot more energy. went back to school, dated a girl for 4 years (had sex even). i now make >6 figures as opposed to the 20k a year i made at 24 playing dota all day and jerking off. Might have identified why you were making $20K there, chief. From what I understand, most employers don't rate "jacking off and playing DOTA" as a super valuable skill, but that doesn't mean they're bad. It just means you're not going to get a loving job to do that. The majority of Synonymous has a new favorite as of 14:44 on Dec 10, 2019 |
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Dec 10, 2019 14:42
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Help, I'm trying to take tons of money out of the ATM but my prostate is dummy thicc and the clap of my unused balls keeps alerting muggers
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Dec 10, 2019 14:48
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This but Stephen from work letting me call him Steve. A HORNY SWEARENGEN posted:Help, I'm trying to take tons of money out of the ATM but my prostate is dummy thicc and the clap of my unused balls keeps alerting muggers hazardousmouse has a new favorite as of 14:56 on Dec 10, 2019 |
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Dec 10, 2019 14:53
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Synonymous posted:Might have identified why you were making $20K there, chief. From what I understand, most employers don't rate "jacking off and playing DOTA" as a super valuable skill, but that doesn't mean they're bad. Seriously, the real money is in jacking of and playing LOL these days.
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Dec 10, 2019 14:56
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