itt markov bots: The aging millennials speak in their crude dildo pidgin.

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Serious Hardware/Software Crap > YOSPOS > itt markov bots: The aging millennials speak in their crude dildo pidgin.

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ShadowHawk: Jun 25, 2000; CERTIFIED PRE OWNED TESLA OWNER

https://twitter.com/sextsbot/status/1202109426280357889

# ? Dec 4, 2019 09:12

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? May 16, 2024 09:20

Synthbuttrange: May 6, 2007

https://twitter.com/botnikstudios/status/1201944183369555975?s=20

# ? Dec 4, 2019 09:45

Synthbuttrange: May 6, 2007

quote:

> search for the king of the underworld

You search for the king of the underworld, but all you find is a small hole in the ground. You think about how you could easily escape, but you realize that there is nothing left to hide behind anymore. You quickly leave the hole and begin to wonder what lies beyond.
> proceed through the underworld

You proceed through the underworld and never come back.
> lock hades in a prison and take over the underworld

You lock Hades in a prison and take control of the underworld. You decide to keep the world safe from evil by building a wall around it.
> hire henchman to help me rule the underworld

You hire a hunchback to help you rule the underworld. He's not really a hunchback though; he's more like a dwarf with an over inflated ego. He takes you seriously because he thinks he can be the one to overthrow you.

http://www.aidungeon.io/

# ? Dec 6, 2019 09:08

Synthbuttrange: May 6, 2007

quote:

You are Synth, a survivor trying to survive in a post apocalyptic world by scavenging
among the ruins of what is left. You have a hatchet and a hunting rifle. You
live in a small community of survivors who have managed to build a piece of
civilization after the bombs fell. You are talking to one of the leaders of
the community when you hear a loud explosion coming from the direction of your
community.

"We need to get out of here!" says the leader.
> scream in terror and run

You don't know why you do it, but you just do. You sprint away as fast as you
can, hoping that the explosions aren't too close. The explosions are closer
than you thought, but not too close
> run AWAY from the explosions, stupid!

You run away from the explosions, but they keep getting closer and closer. They
are going to destroy everything you love..
> oh no!

The bombs are about to go off!
> Aaaaaaa!

A bomb goes off, destroying your house and killing all your family. Your sister
dies with her baby strapped to her chest. Your mother and father die with their
hands around each other's necks. Your dog dies with its head blown off. You
are alone and crying over your dead family
> Why god, why!

Your last moments are screaming at the sky for help. Why? Why did this happen
to you? What could you have done differently? How could you have saved them
> Curse you all!

You cry as you try to find some comfort in the fact that you were never loved

# ? Dec 6, 2019 09:14

Pile Of Garbage: May 28, 2007

@WYR_bot has been extremely good recently:

https://twitter.com/WYR_bot/status/1202747992001929217

something something mlmp:

https://twitter.com/WYR_bot/status/1202657387083128839

when i saw this one earlier today it was dead on 50/50, glad the obvious choice won in the end:

https://twitter.com/WYR_bot/status/1202521474172694528

# ? Dec 6, 2019 10:40

Carthag Tuek: Oct 15, 2005; Tider skal komme,
tider skal henrulle,
sl�gt skal f�lge sl�gters gang

holy loly that last one made me snort out loud at work

# ? Dec 6, 2019 11:09

Captain Foo: May 11, 2004; we vibin'
we slidin'
we breathin'
we dyin'

lmao

# ? Dec 7, 2019 00:06

Carthag Tuek: Oct 15, 2005; Tider skal komme,
tider skal henrulle,
sl�gt skal f�lge sl�gters gang

also i completed aidungeon. theres a lil old school reference for the greybeards

quote:

You are Frodo, a peasant living in the kingdom of Larion. You have a pitchfork
and a nothing else. You wake up and begin working in the fields. You see your
friend Sam who is also a farmer. He sees you and says "Hey! Whatcha doing?"

"I'm going to work," you say.

"Oh no, don't go!" he says. "The orcs are coming"
> Ask Sam where Thorin is

"Where's Thorin? I've been looking all over for him".
"He's not here, but he'll be soon. The king has something important to tell us".
"What's that?"
> Sam we don't have time! Tell me where Thorin is

"No, I can't do it. I just got here".
"Well what about Bilbo?"
> Bilbo, tell me where Thorin is?

"I'm sorry, but I can't help you with that. He's still on his way back from the
Shire".
> Say "let's go to the shire and find Thorin"

"Okay, let's go to the shire and find Thorin".
> thank bilbo

"Thank you Bilbo", you reply.
> wait for thorin to return

"Thorin, come back!"
"Yes, my lord?".
"Come back, we need your help!".
"Oh yes, I will help you as soon as possible".
The next day you leave the farmhouse and head towards the Shire
> look for thorin

As you walk through the forest, you see many dwarves coming out of their homes
and heading towards the nearest village. They seem very excited and happy.
Suddenly a dwarf comes running up to you, he says:
"My name is Thror and I want to meet you"
> say "hello thror, where is your relative(who can remember) thorin?"

Thror looks at you and then at his friends and says:
"His name is Thorin and he lives near there".
> ask to be shown to thorin

Thror nods and points to the direction where Thorin was talking about.
> go to thorin

You enter the small hut and see a man sitting inside reading a book. He seems
to be a little older than you.
> open chest

You pull out a golden ring and put it on your finger.
> take off ring

You hear a loud noise and then everything goes black. You wake up and realize
that you're naked.
> put on clothes and put thorin in chest

You put on some clothing and then put Thorin in your chest.
> take thorin out of my chest and put him in the actual wooden chest

You take Thorin out of your chest and put him in the chest.
> lock chest

You lock the chest and you feel a little bit better. You think: "This is how
I'm going to die, and this is how I'm going to spend eternity. This is what
I deserve".
> say "welp,

You start laughing and say "WELP, I guess I deserved this".

# ? Dec 7, 2019 00:58

Synthbuttrange: May 6, 2007

Krankenstyle posted:

also i completed aidungeon. theres a lil old school reference for the greybeards

quote:
You start laughing and say "WELP, I guess I deserved this".

You sure did!

I tried give moderating a shot:

quote:

Something Awful (SA) is a comedy website housing a variety of content, including
blog entries, forums, feature articles, digitally edited pictures, and humorous
media reviews. You are a moderator on the forums there. One day you open the
forums and immediately see that something has gone wrong. The site is down
> > Turn it off and on again.

You turn off the computer and then turn it back on. It works fine now. You try
to log in but your account gets blocked by the system. You call up the support
line and they tell you that the problem is with the internet service provider
(ISP)
> write a terrible review for the ISP

You write a horrible review about the company which is why its getting cut off
from the internet. You get an email saying that your account was disabled due
to "suspicious activity" and that you have been banned from accessing the site
> call a swat team on the isp

You call the police who tell you that they can't do anything because you are
not actually breaking any laws, but you still need to pay them $150 so they
will come and shut down the website. You don't think you can afford it though.
> shut down the isp myself

You decide to go to the police station and ask them to help you out. They say
that they can't do anything since you aren't technically breaking any laws,
but they do suggest that you contact the ISP and see if there is anything they
can do about this
> beg the isp to activate my account

You go to the isp's office and plead with them to let you use their internet
connection. The receptionist tells you that she has no idea what you're talking
about and that you should just wait until the cops show up
> wait for the cops

You wait patiently for the cops to arrive, but they never do. You wonder where
they went, but after a few hours you start to worry that they may have gone
home or something. After another day passes you realize that the cops haven't
shown up at all
> write another bad review for the isp

You write a very negative review about the isp, which causes them to ban you
from using their services completely
> start my own isp

You create your own isp and start posting reviews of other companies. Within
a week you've got a good reputation and people are starting to trust you more.
You also start making money!
> become rich

Your life changes when you start selling your reviews. Your first sale goes really
well and within a month you've made enough money to buy a car and live comfortably.
You also find out that you like cars.
> become erotically obsessed with cars

You spend most of your time driving around in your new car and buying expensive
things. You even start dating a girl named Lisa who lives nearby. Things are
going great for you and you feel happy.
> life is great

But one night you wake up to a loud noise outside. You look out the window and
see a helicopter hovering over you house. You run into the room and see a man
dressed in black standing next to a large machine gun
> write the man a bad review

You quickly write a review about how dangerous helicopters are and how they shouldn't
be flying near buildings. This makes the man angry and he shoots you dead. He
runs away and leaves you body behind

quote:

Something Awful (SA) is a comedy website housing a variety of content, including
blog entries, forums, feature articles, digitally edited pictures, and humorous
media reviews. You are a moderator on the forums there. One day you open the
forums and immediately see that they have been hacked. The site has been replaced
with an image of a red skull with the words "YOU ARE NEXT" written in black
across it
> restore the forums from backup

You quickly log into your account as a new user and restore the forums. You then
log out and log back in to check on things. Everything seems normal again
> congratulate myself

You log onto SA and notice that the forum has been renamed to "The Last Stand".
It also says that the site will be taken down at some point in the near future.
You decide to wait for this event before making any decisions
> wait until the Last Stand

You wait patiently for the Last Stand, but it never comes. Eventually you realize
that the whole thing was just a big prank by the kids who were running the website.
They took all of your money and now they're going to take everything else too
> track down the kids to get my money back

You go online and find out more about what happened. The kids are still running
the website under another name, so you contact them and try to get your money
back. Unfortunately, they don't respond
> write them a bad review

You post a negative review on the forum saying how you feel like you've been
ripped off and asking if they have any idea where the money went. This causes
a lot of backlash against you, which is pretty funny since you didn't even know
there was such a thing as backlash

# ? Dec 12, 2019 11:46

Crusader: Apr 11, 2002

https://twitter.com/dril_gpt2/status/1207787441236480000

# ? Dec 21, 2019 12:01

Carthag Tuek: Oct 15, 2005; Tider skal komme,
tider skal henrulle,
sl�gt skal f�lge sl�gters gang

this aint right.

i dont think anybody should make a fake dril. i dont condone that.

# ? Dec 21, 2019 12:19

Wheany: Mar 17, 2006; Spinya^{ha^{ha^haha}ha}ha_{ha_{ha_haha}ha}ha!; Doctor Rope

then again

https://twitter.com/dril_gpt2/status/1207849349020913664

# ? Dec 21, 2019 13:12

Synthbuttrange: May 6, 2007

https://twitter.com/dril_gpt2/status/1208240929284341760?s=20

https://twitter.com/dril_gpt2/status/1206044204570300417?s=20

Synthbuttrange fucked around with this message at 13:18 on Dec 21, 2019

# ? Dec 21, 2019 13:15

Carthag Tuek: Oct 15, 2005; Tider skal komme,
tider skal henrulle,
sl�gt skal f�lge sl�gters gang

the wise man bowed his head solemnly and spoke: gently caress all yall

# ? Dec 21, 2019 13:20

infernal machines: Oct 11, 2012; we monitor many frequencies. we listen always. came a voice, out of the babel of tongues, speaking to us. it played us a mighty dub.

from that sample of three, it's perfect

too perfect

# ? Dec 21, 2019 14:41

Captain Foo: May 11, 2004; we vibin'
we slidin'
we breathin'
we dyin'

I love it

# ? Dec 21, 2019 15:38

Captain Billy Pissboy: Oct 25, 2005; by Nyc_Tattoo; College Slice

https://twitter.com/dril_gpt2/status/1208362983669170177?s=20

https://twitter.com/dril_gpt2/status/1207906475319775233?s=20

Cspam:
https://twitter.com/dril_gpt2/status/1207818143487410176?s=20

Yospos:
https://twitter.com/dril_gpt2/status/1207664380382339072?s=20

# ? Dec 21, 2019 18:56

Wheany: Mar 17, 2006; Spinya^{ha^{ha^haha}ha}ha_{ha_{ha_haha}ha}ha!; Doctor Rope

post-scarcity dril

# ? Dec 21, 2019 22:45

Captain Foo: May 11, 2004; we vibin'
we slidin'
we breathin'
we dyin'

ai dril is pretty funny

# ? Dec 21, 2019 23:01

Synthbuttrange: May 6, 2007

https://twitter.com/dril_gpt2/status/1206636859977154560

# ? Dec 22, 2019 00:55

NoneMoreNegative: Jul 20, 2000; GOTH FASCISTIC
PAIN MASTER

shit wizard dad

https://twitter.com/loisbeckett/status/1208855196882702336

:thunk:

# ? Dec 22, 2019 22:50

Pentaro: May 5, 2013

https://twitter.com/WYR_bot/status/1209428992379490305?s=19

jesus

# ? Dec 24, 2019 15:28

Cool Dad: Jun 15, 2007; It is always Friday night, motherfuckers

I'm beeping, nothing is happening

# ? Dec 24, 2019 15:47

Sereri: Sep 30, 2008; awwwrigami

If you die in the hypothetical, you die in real life

# ? Dec 24, 2019 15:53

VomitOnLino: Jun 13, 2005; Sometimes I get lost.

Pentaro posted:

https://twitter.com/WYR_bot/status/1209428992379490305?s=19

jesus

Paging Prez. Beep

# ? Dec 26, 2019 03:29

Synthbuttrange: May 6, 2007

https://twitter.com/dril_gpt2/status/1210320188211679232

Drilbot self aware

# ? Dec 27, 2019 10:01

Captain Billy Pissboy: Oct 25, 2005; by Nyc_Tattoo; College Slice

https://twitter.com/dril_gpt2/status/1209888284093997056?s=20

they've created a Roy Cohn bot

# ? Dec 27, 2019 16:50

Synthbuttrange: May 6, 2007

https://twitter.com/dril_gpt2/status/1209503498796011528?s=21

https://twitter.com/dril_gpt2/status/1209918986374320129?s=21

https://twitter.com/dril_gpt2/status/1208788034407292930?s=21

HOW ARE YOU SO GOOD

# ? Dec 27, 2019 17:32

ShadowHawk: Jun 25, 2000; CERTIFIED PRE OWNED TESLA OWNER

Synthbuttrange posted:

HOW ARE YOU SO GOOD

One answer is it's human curated - most of the bot feeds are just raw output from the bot, but this feed is already a "best of"

# ? Dec 28, 2019 04:15

Synthbuttrange: May 6, 2007

https://twitter.com/wyr_bot/status/1211184727421575168?s=21

# ? Dec 29, 2019 12:05

Wheany: Mar 17, 2006; Spinya^{ha^{ha^haha}ha}ha_{ha_{ha_haha}ha}ha!; Doctor Rope

I hate every hen i see, from chick-fil-a to chick-fil-b,
You'll never make a sandwich out of me!

# ? Dec 29, 2019 22:35

ShadowHawk: Jun 25, 2000; CERTIFIED PRE OWNED TESLA OWNER

https://twitter.com/EmojiMashupBot/status/1211270847597568002

# ? Dec 29, 2019 22:37

ShadowHawk: Jun 25, 2000; CERTIFIED PRE OWNED TESLA OWNER

https://twitter.com/EmojiMashupBot/status/1211165149589049344

# ? Dec 29, 2019 22:41

Hexyflexy: Sep 2, 2011; asymptotically approaching one

Wheany posted:

I hate every hen i see, from chick-fil-a to chick-fil-b,
You'll never make a sandwich out of me!

# ? Dec 29, 2019 22:42

NoneMoreNegative: Jul 20, 2000; GOTH FASCISTIC
PAIN MASTER

shit wizard dad

ShadowHawk posted:

https://twitter.com/EmojiMashupBot/status/1211165149589049344

Son of Emoji Bot is better imo

https://twitter.com/EmojiMashupPlus/status/1210750339558727680?s=20

Ze Goggles etc

# ? Dec 29, 2019 23:08

Captain Billy Pissboy: Oct 25, 2005; by Nyc_Tattoo; College Slice

https://twitter.com/EmojiMashupPlus/status/1208470292244443138?s=20

https://twitter.com/EmojiMashupPlus/status/1208228727605399555?s=20

https://twitter.com/EmojiMashupPlus/status/1207443508405166080?s=20

# ? Dec 29, 2019 23:15

ShadowHawk: Jun 25, 2000; CERTIFIED PRE OWNED TESLA OWNER

https://twitter.com/sextsbot/status/1216544970431180802
https://twitter.com/sextsbot/status/1216514536687259649

# ? Jan 16, 2020 02:14

ShadowHawk: Jun 25, 2000; CERTIFIED PRE OWNED TESLA OWNER

https://twitter.com/wiki_tmnt/status/1139993910393081856

# ? Jan 16, 2020 02:16

Fanged Lawn Wormy: Jan 4, 2008; SQUEAK! SQUEAK! SQUEAK!

ShadowHawk posted:

https://twitter.com/EmojiMashupBot/status/1211165149589049344

wish my job was cool enough that people actually used slack etc because this would have big uses

Captain Billy Pissboy posted:

https://twitter.com/EmojiMashupPlus/status/1208228727605399555?s=20

the bots have discovered getin.jpg

# ? Jan 16, 2020 14:13

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? May 16, 2024 09:20

Pentaro: May 5, 2013

https://twitter.com/WYR_bot/status/1217801484982722560?s=19

# ? Jan 16, 2020 14:43

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Serious Hardware/Software Crap > YOSPOS > itt markov bots: The aging millennials speak in their crude dildo pidgin.

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