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bewilderment
Nov 22, 2007
man what



Unironically for vampire/immortal fiction set in various time periods, you should check out the 'clanbooks' for the Vampire The Requiem RPG (the spiritual successor to the 90s game Masquerade). Each one is basically just a framing device for a collection of lore on each of the vampire clans and then there's ten pages at the end of "here's how you might use some of this in your game".

The one about Mekhet is probably the best except the main illustrator they use throughout doesn't seem to quite get the vibe they were going for with the main character, which makes it especially jarring when a different illustrator gives a picture of her in the back of the book "here's how to use this character in your own game if you want".

These are apparently the same person. And you can tell they were going off the same description too, just one of them didn't quite get it.

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BioEnchanted
Aug 9, 2011

He plays for the dreamers that forgot how to dream, and the lovers that forgot how to love.
The one on the left also has more character in her pose, while the one on the right is just kind of standing there.

Crowetron
Apr 29, 2009

I'm more willing to believe the one on the right is someone's Hogwarts OC than I am to believe she's a vampire.

bewilderment
Nov 22, 2007
man what



BioEnchanted posted:

The one on the left also has more character in her pose, while the one on the right is just kind of standing there.

Left is a scene in the story accompanying the text, right is a 'reference image'.

3D Megadoodoo
Nov 25, 2010

BioEnchanted posted:

The one on the left also has more character in her pose, while the one on the right is just kind of standing there.

:lol: what?

Samuringa
Mar 27, 2017

Best advice I was ever given?

"Ticker, you'll be a lot happier once you stop caring about the opinions of a culture that is beneath you."

I learned my worth, learned the places and people that matter.

Opened my eyes.
Am I really going to be the first to ask why her skin is green? I'm pretty sure becoming a vampire doesn't turn you into Shrek

InediblePenguin
Sep 27, 2004

I'm strong. And a giant penguin. Please don't eat me. No, really. Don't try.

Samuringa posted:

Am I really going to be the first to ask why her skin is green? I'm pretty sure becoming a vampire doesn't turn you into Shrek

Look at the background of the picture on the left. The whole scene has green lighting, probably meant to invoke the weird look given by cheap fluorescents in a public restroom

TheKennedys
Sep 23, 2006

By my hand, I will take you from this godforsaken internet

Samuringa posted:

Am I really going to be the first to ask why her skin is green? I'm pretty sure becoming a vampire doesn't turn you into Shrek

looks like it's just the lighting choice

re: that gender thing though, I feel like I know what they're -trying- to do (separate gender roles from biological sex and canonize it in a way that applies to an entire society, which I guess is a positive concept?) but the execution seems like uh

bad

Samuringa
Mar 27, 2017

Best advice I was ever given?

"Ticker, you'll be a lot happier once you stop caring about the opinions of a culture that is beneath you."

I learned my worth, learned the places and people that matter.

Opened my eyes.
The severed hand and the legs still have normal flesh colors though, but I guess that was the intent, even if poorly executed.

chitoryu12
Apr 24, 2014

Our hero has taken his scared human trafficking victim into town on a date. She has panic attacks in the dark, as it reminds her of the truck she and the other sex slaves were packed into.

theironjef
Aug 11, 2009

The archmage of unexpected stinks.

BioEnchanted posted:

The one on the left also has more character in her pose, while the one on the right is just kind of standing there.

Dunno. Right one has a wide-set stance and a can-do hand on the hip. Looks like she's about to point out that Carmen Sandiego is hiding in the Hagia Sophia because the last clue mentioned Emperor Justinian I!

The one on the left has omitted the blouse to work some cleavage in there and is doing the standard "I'm so bored of all this bloody sexy bloody blood" pose that lady vampires are assigned on day 1 of White Wolf school.

there wolf
Jan 11, 2015

by Fluffdaddy

chitoryu12 posted:

Our hero has taken his scared human trafficking victim into town on a date. She has panic attacks in the dark, as it reminds her of the truck she and the other sex slaves were packed into.



What kind of nightlight takes batteries?

chitoryu12
Apr 24, 2014

I finally made it to the first lovers’ sex scene!





Strom Cuzewon
Jul 1, 2010

TheKennedys posted:

looks like it's just the lighting choice

re: that gender thing though, I feel like I know what they're -trying- to do (separate gender roles from biological sex and canonize it in a way that applies to an entire society, which I guess is a positive concept?) but the execution seems like uh

bad

The descriptions make me initially think of a world where gender presentation is completely divorced from biology, but at the same time everybody is really picky about which genitals they like.

chitoryu12
Apr 24, 2014

AngryRobotsInc
Aug 2, 2011

"It's music to my dick." is an amazing piece of writing, for all the wrong reasons.

Lord Awkward
Feb 16, 2012

chitoryu12 posted:

Large. Hooded. Flexible.

:ohdear:

PJOmega
May 5, 2009

It apparently is a crossover with the Meredith Gentry TragicMonsterFucker series.

Powerful Two-Hander
Mar 10, 2004

Mods please change my name to "Tooter Skeleton" TIA.



:lol:

Pastry of the Year
Apr 12, 2013


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PXBBGjUjy2c

there wolf
Jan 11, 2015

by Fluffdaddy

chitoryu12 posted:

I finally made it to the first lovers’ sex scene!







This poo poo is making me appreciate Anne Bishop's sex scenes. ANNE loving BISHOP

chitoryu12
Apr 24, 2014

Runcible Cat
May 28, 2007

Ignoring this post


Jesus Christ. How may paragraphs did it take before a pawn got used as a buttplug?

chitoryu12
Apr 24, 2014



This book really hates Albania.

chitoryu12 has a new favorite as of 00:27 on Jan 1, 2020

Dienes
Nov 4, 2009

dee
doot doot dee
doot doot doot
doot doot dee
dee doot doot
doot doot dee
dee doot doot


College Slice
That book reads like E. L. James put the lyrics of Jizzed in My Pants into a neural net text generator.

Antivehicular
Dec 30, 2011


I wanna sing one for the cars
That are right now headed silent down the highway
And it's dark and there is nobody driving And something has got to give

Is anyone else picturing this dude as just a huge walking penis with arms? It's the only way I can parse how much he feels with his dick alone.

EDIT: Alternately, Dickbutt

chitoryu12
Apr 24, 2014



Screw the pie.

Tulalip Tulips
Sep 1, 2013

The best apologies are crafted with love.
Screwing the pie would at least be terrible in a potentially different way.

Hemingway To Go!
Nov 10, 2008

im stupider then dog shit, i dont give a shit, and i dont give a fuck, and i will never shut the fuck up, and i'll always Respect my enemys.
- ernest hemingway

Antivehicular posted:

Is anyone else picturing this dude as just a huge walking penis with arms? It's the only way I can parse how much he feels with his dick alone.

EDIT: Alternately, Dickbutt

I mean, apparently from the Internet and some guys I've met that's how a lot of men apparently function. If you are not careful your dick, during the night, will swim through your body until it reaches your skull, and then eat your entire brain and take total control.

Mr. Sunshine
May 15, 2008

This is a scrunt that has been in space too long and become a Lunt (Long Scrunt)

Fun Shoe
It's wonderful. It's a grown woman writing a grown man with the inner monologue of a terminally horny 14 year old boy.

Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised.

Mr. Sunshine posted:

It's wonderful. It's a grown woman writing a grown man with the inner monologue of a terminally horny 14 year old boy.

I can't blame her for considering this an entirely realistic scenario.

there wolf
Jan 11, 2015

by Fluffdaddy

Tulalip Tulips posted:

Screwing the pie would at least be terrible in a potentially different way.

American Pie wasn't good, but it was better than this.

SUPERMAN'S GAL PAL
Feb 21, 2006

Holy Moly! DARKSEID IS!

I like the part where a grown woman is writing about a grown man who is supposed to be extremely promiscuous yet freaking out over blood on a condom as if he’s never seen that once in his life, meaning James is either implying the typical eye-rolling idea men are too ignorant to know/care about any kind of post-PiV bleeding, or James is actually that ignorant of how anatomy works. Yes, I’m sure she’s attempting to demonstrate how he cares that he may have hurt her during sex, but that’s not what we got.

Dienes
Nov 4, 2009

dee
doot doot dee
doot doot doot
doot doot dee
dee doot doot
doot doot dee
dee doot doot


College Slice

SUPERMAN'S GAL PAL posted:

I like the part where a grown woman is writing about a grown man who is supposed to be extremely promiscuous yet freaking out over blood on a condom as if he’s never seen that once in his life, meaning James is either implying the typical eye-rolling idea men are too ignorant to know/care about any kind of post-PiV bleeding, or James is actually that ignorant of how anatomy works. Yes, I’m sure she’s attempting to demonstrate how he cares that he may have hurt her during sex, but that’s not what we got.

I take it you're unfamiliar with men produced by the Amercian sex education system, who think women pee from their vaginas, that labia indicate how much sex a woman has, and that women can 'hold in' their periods like its a full bladder.

Edit: vvvvvvv Mixed up author/character names. Just saying that its depressingly common over the pond and I would 100% believe Maxim is just that stupid.

Dienes has a new favorite as of 17:15 on Jan 2, 2020

SUPERMAN'S GAL PAL
Feb 21, 2006

Holy Moly! DARKSEID IS!

E. L. James is a British woman. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised.
have you like, seen british men

SimonChris
Apr 24, 2008

The Baron's daughter is missing, and you are the man to find her. No problem. With your inexhaustible arsenal of hard-boiled similes, there is nothing you can't handle.
Grimey Drawer

Samuringa posted:

There is a /r/menwritingwomen



(Patrick Rothfuss, Kingkiller Chronicles)



(John Varley, Please Enter)




(Dean Koontz, Twilight Eyes)



(Ned Vizzini, Kind of a Funny Story)





This isn't a terrible book as a whole, but I was reminded of this:

Rendezvous with Rama posted:

CHAPTER ELEVEN - Men, Women and Monkeys
Some women, Commander Norton had decided long ago, should not be allowed aboard ship; weightlessness did things to their breasts that were too drat distracting. It was bad enough when they were motionless; but when they started to move, and sympathetic vibrations set in, it was more than any warm-blooded male should be asked to take. He was quite sure that at least one serious space accident had been caused by acute crew distraction, after the transit of a well-upholstered lady officer through the control cabin.

He had once mentioned this theory to Surgeon-Commander Laura Ernst, without revealing who had inspired his particular train of thought. There was no need; they knew each other much too well. On Earth, years ago, in a moment of mutual loneliness and depression, they had once made love. Probably they would never repeat the experience (but could one ever be quite sure of that?) because so much had changed for both of them. Yet whenever the well-built Surgeon oscillated into the Commander's cabin, he felt a fleeting echo, of an old passion, she knew that he felt it, and everyone was happy.

"the well-built Surgeon oscillated into the Commander's cabin..." indeed.

HopperUK
Apr 29, 2007

Why would an ambulance be leaving the hospital?

SimonChris posted:

This isn't a terrible book as a whole, but I was reminded of this:


"the well-built Surgeon oscillated into the Commander's cabin..." indeed.

That second passage is solid evidence for why *men* shouldn't be allowed aboard spaceships to be honest :D

Rockman Reserve
Oct 2, 2007

"Carbons? Purge? What are you talking about?!"

SimonChris posted:

This isn't a terrible book as a whole, but I was reminded of this:


"the well-built Surgeon oscillated into the Commander's cabin..." indeed.

While Rendezvous with Rama isn’t a terrible book, its sequels literally inspired this thread.

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Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised.

HopperUK posted:

That second passage is solid evidence for why *men* shouldn't be allowed aboard spaceships to be honest :D

Dongs flapping all over the place.

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