chemtrail huffer posted:

My [21F] boyfriend's [23M] relationship with his teddybear is making me uncomfortable

chemtrail huffer posted:

He has this teddy bear, let's name him Teddy

chemtrail huffer posted:

My [21F] boyfriend's [23M] relationship with his teddybear is making me uncomfortable

quote:

We’ve dated for four months nearly and she spent Christmas with my family for 7 days. During the time we were away she exhibited “clingy” moments such as, why I suddenly wasn’t hugging her a certain way in bed (she thought she’d done something wrong) and another moment was basically I was trying to settle my dog that kept jumping up between us and I had to sit on the floor to settle her for a few hours. My gf said said that she missed me being on the sofa with her that evening.

She revealed that the reasons she got like that was due to anxiety, and she felt embarrassed it. No biggie, she said she was trying to manage it.

Anyway, she left my house yesterday after spending the night and before she left she asked if she could come over the following night, seeing as my plans had fallen through and I was now free.

I reminded her that she’d made plans with two of my friends that evening and she should go see them. She got a bit annoyed and said that those plans were still open, as she wanted to see if I was free first and that she felt a bit weird making plans with my friends without me being there (as they are my friends and she’s still getting to know them.)

She got upset and said “do you think we’re seeing too much of each other?” And I said yes, that we’d spent the last 9 days together and she should go out and enjoy herself.

She then asked if she was being “clingy” and I said “yes, a little bit. Especially the times over Christmas and just now.” She got upset at this and revealed she felt embarrassed and that “this isn’t her naturally, and she’s not a clingy person.” She then said if this was bothering me and I said “only if you keep going on about it.”

She soon stopped and left soon after. She spent the night at my friends and didn’t text me good night which we normally do. The next day I texted her and she made no mention of plans or seeing me.

After that, she’s been pretty busy and it seems she’s gone the complete opposite to how she was behaving. She’s made plans with friends next weekend and next week I’ll see her on Thursday, as she’s cancelled our usual film night on Tuesday to see her sister.

I get that she’s trying to give me space but I’m not sure how to feel about all this. Her texts are still the same and we still text each other good night, but I feel her behaviour has gone to the extreme.

How do I proceed from here?

TLDR - said my girlfriend was acting clingy and now she’s acting busy and “giving me space” . What do I do?

chemtrail huffer posted:

My [21F] boyfriend's [23M] relationship with his teddybear is making me uncomfortable

chemtrail huffer posted:

My [21F] boyfriend's [23M] relationship with his teddybear is making me uncomfortable

chemtrail huffer posted:

My [21F] boyfriend's [23M] relationship with his teddybear is making me uncomfortable

quote:

My boyfriend was brushing his teeth in the bathroom. I wanted to take the trash out and gently pushed the door open. He freaked out at me opening the door (as he usually does if I catch him peeing in toilet with his dick in his hand) and I saw an inch view through cracked door of him brushing his teeth and what looked like dark yellow liquid in my sink with water running. I asked him if he peed or was peeing in my sink to which he answered NO! “ and slammed the door in my face. I didn’t believe him and when he came out I was like why the gently caress are you pissing in my sink that’s disgusting and he proceeded to tell me the water was coming out a dark yellow while he brushed his teeth. He told me to go and turn water on and see the discolored water coming out. I did that for 3 seconds like a dumbass before I was like nah I know what I saw and I never seen discolored water since living here.

After a while of me telling him how disgusting and disrespected I feel about him pissing in my sink WHILE I BEEEN cleaning kitchen and house whole he has been sleeping he fesses up and apologizes. It’s not enough. I am mad he would disrespect my house like that. We have been dating for 2.5 years. He isn’t a stranger that randomly pissed in my sink where I wash my hands and brush my teeth. Has anyone been through this?

chemtrail huffer posted:

My [21F] boyfriend's [23M] relationship with his teddybear is making me uncomfortable

quote:

WHILE I BEEEN cleaning kitchen and house whole

Pinecone Sample posted:

BF pissing in bathroom sink

posted:

It all goes down the same way, and its being actively flushed whilst hes doing it if the tap is running. Do you pee in the shower? Its the same thing, I dont see the issue as long as he cleans it

posted:

Lol, it’s a little gross but “disrespectful”? He was pissing in the sink, not on your carpet. Just ask him not to piss in the sink anymore and make him clean it.

I pee in the sink when my girlfriend is occupado; it’s really not a big deal when you think about it

posted:

How is it disrespectful? I pissed in the sink all through college when I lived In the dorms and now it really doesn’t bother me. Kinda more convenient sometimes. Might be kinda gross but not disrespectful. Weirder to shame him so hard just over pissing

posted:

it’s all pipes, what’s the difference??

Whorelord posted:

I know I'm focusing on the wrong thing here, but is 5 or 6 really an appropriate age to take a close teddy away from a child?

Inceltown posted:

Reddit being full of sink pissers is not a shock at all.

xtal posted:

And that their defense is "it's ok because it's just like peeing in the shower, which everybody does and isn't gross either!"

Licarn posted:

My [29M] girlfriend [28F] has started pulling away after I said she’d been acting clingy lately. What do I do?

Jack2142 posted:

Spending more on water to own the Libs!

1redflag posted:

That’s a tough one. Depression is some real poo poo, but the total shirking of all parental duties is still a little too much for me.

Smirking_Serpent posted:

AITA for not wanting my son to literally be named "John Doe?"

So my last name is Doe. It hasn't affected my life much apart from occasionally being called "Dodo" while growing up or friends spelling it "D'Oh" as a joke, and I'm generally pretty neutral about it.

My wife is six months pregnant and wants to name our future son after her grandfather, who died of cancer in September. His name was John.

I liked her grandfather, and I know he and my wife were very close, but I won't even consider it, not even for our son's middle name. I feel that's just setting him up a world of problems, especially when he grows up and has to apply for jobs. Nobody's going to believe "John Doe" is his real name.

My wife thinks I'm being an rear end in a top hat for vetoing a name with a strong family connection and says I'm exaggerating the issues he would face. AITA?

Smirking_Serpent posted:

AITA for not wanting my son to literally be named "John Doe?"

AWarmBody posted:

Just make it his middle name. Problem solved!

quote:

I won't even consider it, not even for our son's middle name.

Smirking_Serpent posted:

AITA for not wanting my son to literally be named "John Doe?"

So my last name is Doe. It hasn't affected my life much apart from occasionally being called "Dodo" while growing up or friends spelling it "D'Oh" as a joke, and I'm generally pretty neutral about it.

My wife is six months pregnant and wants to name our future son after her grandfather, who died of cancer in September. His name was John.

I liked her grandfather, and I know he and my wife were very close, but I won't even consider it, not even for our son's middle name. I feel that's just setting him up a world of problems, especially when he grows up and has to apply for jobs. Nobody's going to believe "John Doe" is his real name.

My wife thinks I'm being an rear end in a top hat for vetoing a name with a strong family connection and says I'm exaggerating the issues he would face. AITA?

therobit posted:

Dad is right. Even a middle name would probably be a problem.

I have to look at a lot of property title reports and if your last name is even a little common you should name your kids something weird. Otherwise when they try and buy or refinance a home they will have to sign a bunch of affidavits stating "Yes I'm John Smith but not the John Smith named in this lawsuit." Ditto for Jose Garcia, Sarah Brown, Marcus Williams, etc. The worst report I have seen have over 50 legal judgements in the county for that name, none with a social.or DOB attached.

MrQwerty posted:

that's not even counting in the idiocy that happens in the medical field

Licarn posted:

Bruceski posted:

I have enough medical record issues just sharing a last name and DOB with my brother. Back in college I got to make some calls across three timezones because his pharmacy had refilled his medication on my insurance (twins, have the same issues and same medication) so they thought I had two months until I could get more. Every conversation between two people while they were sorting it out needed me in the loop to authorize them talking to each other.

Smirking_Serpent posted:

AITA for refusing to eat the cake at a potluck because the person who made it has a nasty house?
...

When I walked into her house the smell knocked me back. It smelled like rotting food and cats. Susie has like 8 cats and they walk everywhere in her house, including on the kitchen counter. I also saw a litter box that was completely full. I don’t have cats, so I don’t know how often they need to be changed but it smelled. Her bathroom looked like it had never been cleaned. Her kitchen was loving terrible. Dirty poo poo and old food everywhere. From there on I told myself I would never eat anything that Susie prepared in her house.

As I was saying her baked goods are an office favorite

Smirking_Serpent posted:

My (31f) husband (34m) and I got into a terrible verbal fight and I don't know if we can come back from it.

Smirking_Serpent posted:

My (31f) husband (34m) and I got into a terrible verbal fight and I don't know if we can come back from it.

Smirking_Serpent posted:

My (31f) husband (34m) and I got into a terrible verbal fight and I don't know if we can come back from it.

We have often argued during our marriage (of 7 years), but resentment has been building this year, along with many stressors. My father passed away at the beginning of 2019. Husband was laid off in April and had a very hard time finding another job. At his new job, I felt he was becoming far too cozy with a secretary and it led to a lot of arguments.

​Yesterday we got into what should have been a minor disagreement. Instead, it's like the floodgates of resentment on both our sides opened and we both just escalated the fight.

​We ended up saying things I don't think can be ever taken back. I know I was saying things that I felt were true but had never really said. I assume he was doing the same. Some of the things that were said:

​- he told me I was fat and always miserable and he was far happier at work than at home around me.

- I told him other men hit on me and obviously don't feel I'm too fat, and I told him he wasn't nearly hot enough to call me fat.

- he told me that I was lazy and boring and that anyone hitting on me was probably just looking for a hook-up and would quickly become turned off by my personality.

- I told him that at least I didn't act inappropriately with other men because, unlike him, I am respectful of our marriage and quickly shut stuff down rather than flirting with the office slut.

- He said at least she was fun and kind and had a beautiful body, so when he had to come home to me every night of course he flirted with her at work because she was a nicer person than me and hotter than me.

- I told him she could have him because he was a boring, lazy lover anyway and I'm sure after she sampled his "technique" she would quickly lose interest.

- he then told me he was boring and lazy with me in bed because he found me gross and he's never been attracted to my body and he only has sex with me when he really wants to cum, but he just wants to get it over with quickly.

​I'm ashamed of how we acted. But the nasty soul-crushing things we said to each other -- I'm guessing we can't come back from that, right? I can't imagine having sex with him again now. Is this something that we could work through in counselling? Or should we call it a day and move forward to separate?

​tldr: after months of stress and resentment, a mundane argument exploded into vicious verbal insults between my husband and I where we attacked each other's insecurities....need to know if it's fixable.