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Pirate Radar posted:Dulce et decorum est pro pasta mori Requiescat in pasta
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# ? Jan 8, 2020 15:00 |
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# ? May 30, 2024 04:23 |
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HardDiskD posted:I thought the mom was 19 for a second there. And M. The way redditors format this poo poo does not flow well.
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# ? Jan 8, 2020 15:27 |
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Pirate Radar posted:Don’t a lot of bodies go into the casket with buttplugs in anyway to hold in all the like, gravy all church service going on and on with the casket lid lifting ever so slowly in the background, two anxious funeral workers watching in the wings, acutely aware that only a buttplug stands between them and utter catastrophe and that this body needs to in the ground now they hatch a plan for one to distract the entire congregation while the other swaps the casket for a hastily improvised replica. Would make a good stoner comedy probably.
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# ? Jan 8, 2020 15:37 |
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Buttplug blasts out like a crude RPG
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# ? Jan 8, 2020 15:53 |
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kru posted:Buttplug blasts out like a crude RPG An rear end propelled grenade or APG if you will
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# ? Jan 8, 2020 15:59 |
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My Lovely Horse posted:this is bringing up mental images of bodies slowly getting more and more bloated as pressure builds Now I want to be a mortician.
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# ? Jan 8, 2020 16:02 |
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Please putt all the buttplugs in my butt as i die
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# ? Jan 8, 2020 16:17 |
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I'm sure that when that one grandma from the lasagna story passed, they buried her with some more lasagna. It's what she would have wanted.
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# ? Jan 8, 2020 17:02 |
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AITA for telling my family to go gently caress themselves after my pregnant wife had an "incident"?quote:The title is worded weirdly, but I hope I'll be able to explain.
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# ? Jan 8, 2020 17:03 |
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AITA for kicking out a co-worker with two broken legs who was staying with me?quote:I worked as an accountant for a warehouse. I'm not sure what exactly happened, but one of the employees had some equipment fall onto his legs and breaking them. Anyways, the owner was scared shitless that the claim would be denied and he would be on the hook for this employee's medical bills and would be fined. He could not afford that to happen. I was the one who had to file the worker's comp claim, but I suspect what I was told happened by everyone wasn't what happened. I think they were smoking weed while moving heavy equipment. Among many other reasons, I started to actively look for another job on the down low. The employee had no one to help take care of him and the owner offered to pay me to let him stay with me.
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# ? Jan 8, 2020 17:04 |
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DemoneeHo posted:I'm sure that when that one grandma from the lasagna story passed, they buried her with some more lasagna. It's what she would have wanted. No no, they made her into the lasagna. That's why it was such a huge deal when they couldn't complete the ritual!
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# ? Jan 8, 2020 17:04 |
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Pirate Radar posted:Don’t a lot of bodies go into the casket with buttplugs in anyway to hold in all the like, gravy I read a book set pre and post WW2, with the main character being a mortician, and there was a passage where he prepped a body for burial. It involved attaching a cork to the corpse's penis, and then putting that cork into the butt, so that the penis wouldn't move around.
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# ? Jan 8, 2020 17:05 |
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DemoneeHo posted:AITA for telling my family to go gently caress themselves after my pregnant wife had an "incident"? Wife has some serious Stockholm Syndrome if she thinks anyone should apologize.
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# ? Jan 8, 2020 17:06 |
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StrangersInTheNight posted:No no, they made her into the lasagna. That's why it was such a huge deal when they couldn't complete the ritual! Iä! Iä! Garfield fhtagn!
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# ? Jan 8, 2020 17:09 |
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StrangersInTheNight posted:No no, they made her into the lasagna. That's why it was such a huge deal when they couldn't complete the ritual! The husband must be sacrificed to complete the cycle LadyPictureShow posted:I read a book set pre and post WW2, with the main character being a mortician, and there was a passage where he prepped a body for burial. Imagine being a corpse and you end up loving yourself even in death
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# ? Jan 8, 2020 17:10 |
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DemoneeHo posted:AITA for kicking out a co-worker with two broken legs who was staying with me? Break his legs again.
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# ? Jan 8, 2020 17:12 |
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DemoneeHo posted:AITA for kicking out a co-worker with two broken legs who was staying with me? Wow, with that title I was sure they would be the rear end in a top hat, but no. gently caress that coworker for ratting out the person housing them
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# ? Jan 8, 2020 17:13 |
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My Lovely Horse posted:this is bringing up mental images of bodies slowly getting more and more bloated as pressure builds Not too far from what happened with William the Conqueror, apparently
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# ? Jan 8, 2020 17:20 |
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Can I request a whistle tip instead of a solid plug
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# ? Jan 8, 2020 17:23 |
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haveblue posted:Can I request a whistle tip instead of a solid plug the Screamer (tm)
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# ? Jan 8, 2020 17:34 |
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I [26M] asked my boyfriend [20M] if it would be ok if I got a roommate in order to save money. He said “no”. To preface this, I have only known my current boyfriend Craig for about a month. I really want things to work out between us, since we live about 30 minutes away from each other, and are able to see each other almost everyday. Most people like us don’t often get this opportunity, since we both met through a furry dating app (there’s not many to choose from in small town America, and most furry relationships start online first, so it can take several months/years before they are able to meet in person). We caught feelings for each other fast, since we both feel like outsiders in more ways than one. I’ve only known him for a short time, but what we have is so rare and special, that I don’t want to lose it. The problem is—I want a roommate; for financial reasons. I am still going to college, and I work in a coffee shop where I get only slightly above minimum wage. I want Craig to be my roommate, but he wants to continue living with his parents so he doesn’t have to spend money unnecessarily while he’s going to school. I asked him if it would be ok if I asked some friends of mine (who had already expressed interest in being my roommate) to live with me. Craig immediately got defensive, and grilled me about the potential candidates. I assured him that I would never cheat on him in a million years, but nothing I said could convince him. He told me that he would always hold resentment towards my roommate; and that he couldn’t accept it if someone else lived with me. Am I being unreasonable here? I seriously just want to save money, and I assured Craig that the roommate would just be a means to an end in order to accomplish that. Am I asking too much of him, too soon? Am I being disrespectful by suggesting something like this so early in our relationship? TL;DR My boyfriend of 1 month is freaking out after I suggested that I wanted a roommate. Is he being unreasonable, or am I? Why does bf get a say at all?
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# ? Jan 8, 2020 17:43 |
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Furries are frequently really bad with boundaries, on account of being socially starved
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# ? Jan 8, 2020 17:45 |
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Schmeichy posted:Wow, with that title I was sure they would be the rear end in a top hat, but no. gently caress that coworker for ratting out the person housing them Imagine being that much of a sniveling piece of poo poo.
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# ? Jan 8, 2020 17:56 |
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Xenocides posted:I [26M] asked my boyfriend [20M] if it would be ok if I got a roommate in order to save money. He said “no”. One month. LOL.
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# ? Jan 8, 2020 18:15 |
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AITA my husband says I am a sexist for not being open to hiring a young attractive nanny to help care for our children. My husband and I are pregnant with our third child we were looking to get a nanny to help out for the first two years. I am planning on returning to work in two months after I deliver. I am a bit uncomfortable having another woman in the house to be honest especially someone younger and more attractive than me. I trust my husband I just don’t want to invite that risk to my home. When we were interviewing candidates I rejected two of the nannies despite them being qualified in everything we were looking for. My husband told me that he doesn’t want to pick anyone that we aren’t both comfortable with around our children. But if I am rejecting them just based on their age and attractiveness that it’s sexist. I agree with my husband, in that if I was applying for a job and I got turned down for my age or level of attractiveness it would be upsetting but I feel that there should be an exception for someone that will be in our house all day. In his words that it shows that I am a sexist when I am the employer or the one in power. I don’t know.
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# ? Jan 8, 2020 18:17 |
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Smirking_Serpent posted:AITA my husband says I am a sexist for not being open to hiring a young attractive nanny to help care for our children. Now who's lying to themselves.
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# ? Jan 8, 2020 18:23 |
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My (19F) Dad (40s M) has an obsession with buying exotic or illegal animal meat and is why my family fell apart.quote:So my dad has always been a kind of strange guy but I never really noticed. I was used to it and that's just who he is. He isn't mean but doesn't talk much, very busy with work, doesn't seem to be interested in anyone's life, that kind of thing. When I was a kid gradually our relatives stopped visiting. My dad wasn't in contact with his family, but my mom's used to be around alot. Then they stopped. I remember hearing my mom fighting with her parents a couple times. I gathered they didn't like my dad. I haven't seen my cousins in years. We used to be close as kids. I was never one for social media, but recently reactivated my facebook and decided to look up some of my relatives on a whim. Speculation in the comments is there might be some human flesh consumed at some point.
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# ? Jan 8, 2020 18:49 |
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StrangersInTheNight posted:Furries are frequently really bad with boundaries, on account of being socially starved ah totally missed that bit, now it makes sense
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# ? Jan 8, 2020 18:58 |
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I can't tell if nanny wife knows the husband's a cheater and won't admit it to herself or she's just mega jealous for no reason.
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# ? Jan 8, 2020 18:59 |
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Say the husband can have a nanny if she can have a pool boy and a landscaper.
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# ? Jan 8, 2020 19:00 |
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Smirking_Serpent posted:AITA my husband says I am a sexist for not being open to hiring a young attractive nanny to help care for our children. Maybe not sexist, but insecure as hell. Assuming her husband has given her no reason to believe he'd cheat on her.
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# ? Jan 8, 2020 19:00 |
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Kill Meat Dad and feed him to African/Chinese wildlife. It's the best option.
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# ? Jan 8, 2020 19:01 |
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is that another meat dad or the same one
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# ? Jan 8, 2020 19:05 |
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My boyfriend [25M] does not accept the fact that I [23F] wish to drink socially. I am not an alcoholic by any means and I rarely drink. The only times I will drink is when I am with friends, such as at a Christmas dinner and to celebrate the new year as a way to chill. I have never gotten drunk. My boyfriend of 3 years has previously mentioned how uncomfortable my drinking will cause him to be, and I have stayed off alcohol mostly. I will inform him whenever I drink, and he allows me to only drink a few sips, Recently we had a fight as I decided that I should find out exactly why he does not like the idea of me drinking. He mentioned that is is afraid something bad will happen to me if I drink alcohol. He says that he is concerned for my safety. I tried to question his reasons, pointing out that it’s very unlikely for that to happen, and that I will never drink to the extent I will get drunk. I truly do not wish to get wasted and lose my ability to make rational decisions. I told him to have trust in me that I will never succumb myself to unsafe and compromising situations, but he is not convinced, My boyfriend said that is is having great difficulty trying to reason himself out of something that he has always believed in (that drinking is bad, he does not hang around people who drink as well), and has trouble balancing it not being controlling. He mentioned that one reason why he is together with me is because I do not drink. I find it really hard to accept his reasons against my drinking. Seeing how upset he got, I caved in once and accepted his wish that I do not continue drinking, I am okay to not continue drinking but I do not see why his reasons are as such. Subsequently, seeing how miserable I was, he mentioned that he will place trust in me and will consider if it’s possible for him to say yes to me. However he is still having great difficulty up til today, and is suggesting for me not to drink in public places, I previously suggested compromising an amount of alcohol to drink, but he was not accepting. This has placed a strain in our relationship and I would like to seek advice on how to resolve this situation. EDIT: to add that he doesn’t have alcoholics in his family... TLDR I wish to drink socially and my boyfriend is upset about that. He thinks that it will cause me to be in unsafe situations, however I am certain to never get drunk.
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# ? Jan 8, 2020 19:21 |
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Ouhei posted:Maybe not sexist, but insecure as hell. It's sexist. She would presumably hire a man with the same qualifications. She is rejecting these candidates on the basis of their sex.
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# ? Jan 8, 2020 19:27 |
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Sjs00 posted:is that another meat dad or the same one Did the other meat dad eat the OP's pet cat?
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# ? Jan 8, 2020 19:28 |
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AITA for joking about there being milk in my girlfriend’s new fake boobs?quote:My girlfriend got breast implants four months ago. They honestly look so ridiculous but I never told her that since they make her happy. She has no children and is in no ways pregnant, but ever since two months after the enlargement, I have joked a few times about there being milk in her boobs. For example, one time she told me to get the milk when we were making scrambled eggs, I pointed at her boobs and joked that there’s milk right there. I also joked that we didn’t have to buy milk anymore. She always just gives me a death stare while saying “ha ha you’re so funny omg” or “you’re so stupid”. I always thought she found these jokes endearing and was just too humble and played hard-to-please.
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# ? Jan 8, 2020 19:38 |
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AITA for staying with my ex-bf against my current bfs wishes to see a concert?quote:Long story short, I was going to go and see a concert with some friends in another city but they bailed on me before we could book accommodation but after I bot the tickets. I couldn't afford to stay myself in the city but my ex bf offered his couch for me to stay on for the night cause he lives in that city and we're still friends. Lol
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# ? Jan 8, 2020 19:40 |
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Sjs00 posted:is that another meat dad or the same one Same weirdo. EDIT: Pinecone Sample posted:AITA for joking about there being milk in my girlfriend’s new fake boobs? quote:She always just gives me a death stare while saying “ha ha you’re so funny omg” or “you’re so stupid”. I always thought she found these jokes endearing and was just too humble and played hard-to-please. How do you interpret "death glare" as "please continue this action, I enjoy it"? Puppy Time fucked around with this message at 19:44 on Jan 8, 2020 |
# ? Jan 8, 2020 19:41 |
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# ? May 30, 2024 04:23 |
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Serephina posted:WIBTA for getting an abortion after my husband dies? Just lie to them and say you had a miscarriage, it's not their business anyways so you're not honor bound to tell the truth DACK FAYDEN posted:I can't tell if nanny wife knows the husband's a cheater and won't admit it to herself or she's just mega jealous for no reason. Seems like she could get by with choosing someone who is EITHER older or not attractive, rather than demanding both qualities
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# ? Jan 8, 2020 19:43 |