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Joey Freshwater
Jun 20, 2004

Always playing with my meat
Grimey Drawer
My company provides us with cars and mine is a 2016 base model Camry. We were supposed to get new models end of last year but it kept getting pushed back.

We got told today that anyone with under 80k mileage on their car wouldn't be getting a new one until 2021. Mine has 78k.

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Play
Apr 25, 2006

Strong stroll for a mangy stray

iwentdoodie posted:

One of our sales guys was poo poo on for having "only" a Mazda 6.

I've been bitched at for my various vehicles, but never in a serious way. More like "dude why are you torturing yourself?"

It's funny because to me having to spend money on a new car and go through that whole experience sounds like torture

If driving crappy cars is torture I suppose my whole life is tortu - . . . . oh god

Joey Freshwater posted:

My company provides us with cars and mine is a 2016 base model Camry. We were supposed to get new models end of last year but it kept getting pushed back.

We got told today that anyone with under 80k mileage on their car wouldn't be getting a new one until 2021. Mine has 78k.

ROAD TRIP

Joey Freshwater
Jun 20, 2004

Always playing with my meat
Grimey Drawer

Play posted:

ROAD TRIP

Oh that was as of the email we got this morning, so I will not be getting a new car until 2021 even though I'll hit 80k by the end of next month

General Dog
Apr 26, 2008

Everybody's working for the weekend
I'm lecturing a bunch of 4th graders on the books of the bible tonight, wish me luck (at church where their parents have brought them, not in a place where I've personally rounded them up)

Chichevache
Feb 17, 2010

One of the funniest posters in GIP.

Just not intentionally.

Joey Freshwater posted:

My company provides us with cars and mine is a 2016 base model Camry. We were supposed to get new models end of last year but it kept getting pushed back.

We got told today that anyone with under 80k mileage on their car wouldn't be getting a new one until 2021. Mine has 78k.

What do you do for a living again, wall stander?

Thaddius the Large
Jul 5, 2006

It's in the five-hole!

General Dog posted:

I'm lecturing a bunch of 4th graders on the books of the bible tonight, wish me luck (at church where their parents have brought them, not in a place where I've personally rounded them up)

Which book is your favorite and why?

iwentdoodie
Apr 29, 2005

🤗YOU'RE WELCOME🤗

Play posted:

It's funny because to me having to spend money on a new car and go through that whole experience sounds like torture

If driving crappy cars is torture I suppose my whole life is tortu - . . . . oh god


ROAD TRIP

I mean, I like fast cars and fun cars and generally new ones.

But my wife has a new car that is paid off in a few months, so why would i want two car payments? And even at that point I'm seriously rethinking getting myself something else. The only reason i would at this point is if i find a deal on a bigger boat, and need to haul it.

FizFashizzle
Mar 30, 2005







General Dog posted:

I'm lecturing a bunch of 4th graders on the books of the bible tonight, wish me luck (at church where their parents have brought them, not in a place where I've personally rounded them up)

Time for some leviticus, bitches

also what

https://twitter.com/tristan_puig/status/1220072456204898304?s=20

General Dog
Apr 26, 2008

Everybody's working for the weekend

Thaddius the Large posted:

Which book is your favorite and why?

I like Ecclesiastes, it's mostly about futility but ends on a hopeful note.

Play
Apr 25, 2006

Strong stroll for a mangy stray

General Dog posted:

I'm lecturing a bunch of 4th graders on the books of the bible tonight, wish me luck (at church where their parents have brought them, not in a place where I've personally rounded them up)

thank you for including that extremely necessary caveat

Ehud
Sep 19, 2003

football.

General Dog posted:

I like Ecclesiastes, it's mostly about futility but ends on a hopeful note.

lol it ends with a promise that god is going to judge everyone

Joey Freshwater
Jun 20, 2004

Always playing with my meat
Grimey Drawer

Chichevache posted:

What do you do for a living again, wall stander?

lol i'm in outside sales for an ocean freight company, I don't make anywhere near enough to be in consideration to be up against the wall.

Impossibly Perfect Sphere
Nov 6, 2002

They wasted Luanne on Lucky!

She could of have been so much more but the writers just didn't care!

Ehud posted:

lol it ends with a promise that god is going to judge everyone

... and finally punish everyone else who deserves it!

Kalli
Jun 2, 2001



The opening of Ecclesiastes is great, as it's just nihilism 101.

“Meaningless! Meaningless!”
says the Teacher.
“Utterly meaningless!
Everything is meaningless.”

What do people gain from all their labors at which they toil under the sun?
Generations come and generations go, but the earth remains forever.
The sun rises and the sun sets, and hurries back to where it rises.
The wind blows to the south and turns to the north;
round and round it goes, ever returning on its course.
All streams flow into the sea, yet the sea is never full.
To the place the streams come from, there they return again.
All things are wearisome, more than one can say.
The eye never has enough of seeing, nor the ear its fill of hearing.
What has been will be again, what has been done will be done again; there is nothing new under the sun.
Is there anything of which one can say, “Look! This is something new”?
It was here already, long ago; it was here before our time.
No one remembers the former generations, and even those yet to come will not be remembered by those who follow them.

It's wrong though, Bible times didn't have Saints Row 3, the greatest single achievement of mankind.

General Dog
Apr 26, 2008

Everybody's working for the weekend

Kalli posted:

It's wrong though, Bible times didn't have Saints Row 3, the greatest single achievement of mankind.

That's not even the good one you fool. SR2 and SR4 are better

Kalli
Jun 2, 2001



General Dog posted:

That's not even the good one you fool. SR2 and SR4 are better

Saints Row 2, 3 and 4 are the books of the new bible

General Dog
Apr 26, 2008

Everybody's working for the weekend
I also think Job is just a great piece of literature, albeit one that could maybe use some tighter editing.

seiferguy
Jun 9, 2005

FLAWED
INTUITION



Toilet Rascal
To appreciate Saints Row 4 you must beat 3, similar that the Acts of the Apostles make no sense if you haven't read the gospels.

Ehud
Sep 19, 2003

football.

Kids being taken to some dumb rear end church for indoctrination reminds me of a funny thing that I remembered the other day. When I was a kid I would talk to my mom about growing up, but I only now realize how hosed up the conversations were. Imagine this at like 7 years old.

Ehud: Mom, where do you think I'll go to college when I grow up?

Mom: Oh, honey...you don't need to think about that. The Lord is going to come back before then.

Ehud: How do you know?

Mom: Prophecy says that the generation that sees Israel reformed will not pass away before Jesus returns.

Ehud: It's not fair that I don't get to grow up!

Mom: When we're all in heaven you won't care about any of the things of this earth.

lol

Kalli
Jun 2, 2001



Also just like the Bible, Saints Row ends with Gat out of Hell which is just a kind of meandering mess with cool Satan imagery just like the Book of Revelations.

FUCKFACE MORON
Apr 23, 2010

by sebmojo

Ehud posted:

Kids being taken to some dumb rear end church for indoctrination reminds me of a funny thing that I remembered the other day. When I was a kid I would talk to my mom about growing up, but I only now realize how hosed up the conversations were. Imagine this at like 7 years old.

Ehud: Mom, where do you think I'll go to college when I grow up?

Mom: Oh, honey...you don't need to think about that. The Lord is going to come back before then.

Ehud: How do you know?

Mom: Prophecy says that the generation that sees Israel reformed will not pass away before Jesus returns.

Ehud: It's not fair that I don't get to grow up!

Mom: When we're all in heaven you won't care about any of the things of this earth.

lol
Is your mom an Evangelical?

General Dog
Apr 26, 2008

Everybody's working for the weekend
It's insane going back to Saints Row 2 and seeing how deep and detailed it is. Like if you climb on top of a moving car, it turns into a little balancing minigame. I think I did an entire playthrough without noticing that, it doesn't even come into play in any of the missions.

Ehud
Sep 19, 2003

football.

Better Than You posted:

Is your mom an Evangelical?

yeah

she grew up independent baptist and raised us in southern baptist churches

General Dog
Apr 26, 2008

Everybody's working for the weekend

Ehud posted:

Kids being taken to some dumb rear end church for indoctrination reminds me of a funny thing that I remembered the other day. When I was a kid I would talk to my mom about growing up, but I only now realize how hosed up the conversations were. Imagine this at like 7 years old.

Ehud: Mom, where do you think I'll go to college when I grow up?

Mom: Oh, honey...you don't need to think about that. The Lord is going to come back before then.

Ehud: How do you know?

Mom: Prophecy says that the generation that sees Israel reformed will not pass away before Jesus returns.

Ehud: It's not fair that I don't get to grow up!

Mom: When we're all in heaven you won't care about any of the things of this earth.

lol

Was this when the Left Behind series was in full swing?

Kalli
Jun 2, 2001



General Dog posted:

It's insane going back to Saints Row 2 and seeing how deep and detailed it is. Like if you climb on top of a moving car, it turns into a little balancing minigame. I think I did an entire playthrough without noticing that, it doesn't even come into play in any of the missions.

It's stupidly hard too, and then you can activate impossible mode by just firing your gun and watching the driver freak out and drive directly into the nearest other car.

I probably played the game for like 30 hours before I finally finished off the Sons of Samedhi and realized there was a full Mall you could go into stocked with the fastest sports cars to mess around with.

General Dog
Apr 26, 2008

Everybody's working for the weekend

Kalli posted:

It's stupidly hard too, and then you can activate impossible mode by just firing your gun and watching the driver freak out and drive directly into the nearest other car.

I probably played the game for like 30 hours before I finally finished off the Sons of Samedhi and realized there was a full Mall you could go into stocked with the fastest sports cars to mess around with.

It's insane how much better Saints Row 2 is than GTA IV. It's really more fun than GTA V too, but GTA V is just so great to look at it kind of gets away with it.

Kalli
Jun 2, 2001



Ehud posted:

yeah

she grew up independent baptist and raised us in southern baptist churches

yeah, I grew up Catholic, did the Sunday School into first communion thing, went to church every sunday for awhile, and it's kind of insane how different that was then what southern people get for religion.

It was all hey be nice to other people <also condoms don't work>.

Like I vaguely remember Sunday school was just us watching this lame religious sitcom that I barely remember anything about ( think it was an old guy and some kids in a park or something? )

Shimrra Jamaane
Aug 10, 2007

Obscure to all except those well-versed in Yuuzhan Vong lore.
Can we blame the Puritans for our current crazy rear end evangelicals or is it more complicated than that?

General Dog
Apr 26, 2008

Everybody's working for the weekend

Kalli posted:

yeah, I grew up Catholic, did the Sunday School into first communion thing, went to church every sunday for awhile, and it's kind of insane how different that was then what southern people get for religion.

It was all hey be nice to other people <also condoms don't work>.

Like I vaguely remember Sunday school was just us watching this lame religious sitcom that I barely remember anything about ( think it was an old guy and some kids in a park or something? )

I got the "condoms don't work" thing in public school

Ehud
Sep 19, 2003

football.

General Dog posted:

Was this when the Left Behind series was in full swing?

No. This was in the early 90's. This is the kind of poo poo that was taught in churches and "prophecy conferences" and preached on the radio.

She still believes Jesus is coming back at any moment.

C-Euro
Mar 20, 2010

:science:
Soiled Meat

Better Than You posted:

Is your mom an Evangelical?

You must be new here.

Play
Apr 25, 2006

Strong stroll for a mangy stray

Kalli posted:

The opening of Ecclesiastes is great, as it's just nihilism 101.

“Meaningless! Meaningless!”
says the Teacher.
“Utterly meaningless!
Everything is meaningless.”

What do people gain from all their labors at which they toil under the sun?
Generations come and generations go, but the earth remains forever.
The sun rises and the sun sets, and hurries back to where it rises.
The wind blows to the south and turns to the north;
round and round it goes, ever returning on its course.
All streams flow into the sea, yet the sea is never full.
To the place the streams come from, there they return again.

All things are wearisome, more than one can say.
The eye never has enough of seeing, nor the ear its fill of hearing.
What has been will be again, what has been done will be done again; there is nothing new under the sun.
Is there anything of which one can say, “Look! This is something new”?
It was here already, long ago; it was here before our time.
No one remembers the former generations, and even those yet to come will not be remembered by those who follow them.

no joke, im extremely feeling this dude. Also appreciate that little hydrological insight there

Kalli
Jun 2, 2001



Shimrra Jamaane posted:

Can we blame the Puritans for our current crazy rear end evangelicals or is it more complicated than that?

Heavily influenced by, but culturally distinct from. The main difference was the puritans believed salvation was incredibly hard to achieve, only after a lifetime of piety and dick abuse while Evangelicals believe that salvation is easy as long as you become a frothing convert.

The Evangelicals came around way after the puritans, combined a bunch of religious reawakening movements happening in Europe (Especially Germany) in the 18th century and that's what got spit out.

Burginator
Sep 10, 2007

Two ALL BEEF patties,
Special Sauce?
Let Us Cheese.

General Dog posted:

Was this when the Left Behind series was in full swing?

I was super into these books when 9/11 happened, and I convinced all my friends that it meant the fulfillment of scripture and that Israel would soon come under attack from a northern power. I literally believed it meant armageddon was happening


I was a loving dweeb.

Impossibly Perfect Sphere
Nov 6, 2002

They wasted Luanne on Lucky!

She could of have been so much more but the writers just didn't care!

Ehud posted:

Kids being taken to some dumb rear end church for indoctrination reminds me of a funny thing that I remembered the other day. When I was a kid I would talk to my mom about growing up, but I only now realize how hosed up the conversations were. Imagine this at like 7 years old.

Ehud: Mom, where do you think I'll go to college when I grow up?

Mom: Oh, honey...you don't need to think about that. The Lord is going to come back before then.

Ehud: How do you know?

Mom: Prophecy says that the generation that sees Israel reformed will not pass away before Jesus returns.

Ehud: It's not fair that I don't get to grow up!

Mom: When we're all in heaven you won't care about any of the things of this earth.

lol



Things I learned from my mom as a child:

- abortion is murder
- kids should not be taught about safe sex/contraceptives
- sex is for marriage
- satanist are real and will try to abduct me
- homosexuals have an agenda to convert kids

Ehud
Sep 19, 2003

football.

Play posted:

no joke, im extremely feeling this dude. Also appreciate that little hydrological insight there

Ecclesiastes is depressing as hell. Here is a cheery passage from Ecclesiastes 4

quote:

Again I looked and saw all the oppression that was taking place under the sun:

I saw the tears of the oppressed—
and they have no comforter;
power was on the side of their oppressors—
and they have no comforter.
And I declared that the dead,
who had already died,
are happier than the living,
who are still alive.
But better than both
is the one who has never been born,
who has not seen the evil
that is done under the sun.

And I saw that all toil and all achievement spring from one person’s envy of another. This too is meaningless, a chasing after the wind.

Ehud
Sep 19, 2003

football.

Burginator posted:

I was super into these books when 9/11 happened, and I convinced all my friends that it meant the fulfillment of scripture and that Israel would soon come under attack from a northern power. I literally believed it meant armageddon was happening


I was a loving dweeb.

hell yeah

lol if you grew up in a family that didn't speculate Obama was the antichrist

Impossibly Perfect Sphere
Nov 6, 2002

They wasted Luanne on Lucky!

She could of have been so much more but the writers just didn't care!
Give me the Song of Solomon and all that porn.

General Dog
Apr 26, 2008

Everybody's working for the weekend

Burginator posted:

I was super into these books when 9/11 happened, and I convinced all my friends that it meant the fulfillment of scripture and that Israel would soon come under attack from a northern power. I literally believed it meant armageddon was happening


I was a loving dweeb.

I think maybe it happened and it’s still happening and we just got used to it

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Burginator
Sep 10, 2007

Two ALL BEEF patties,
Special Sauce?
Let Us Cheese.

Ehud posted:

hell yeah

lol if you grew up in a family that didn't speculate Obama was the antichrist

oh yeah that's my dad's side of the family -- I was also SUPER straight edge and cut off all my friends who smoked pot or drank in high school, literally overnight. (I didn't drink until my 21st, and didn't smoke anything cigarette or otherwise until I was 22)


13 year old me and 31 year old me are basically diametrically opposed individuals

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