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It's real. They have seasoned potatoes and a breakfast baconatorprepuce repurposed posted:Let's face it. Wendy's breakfast menu looks gross, but not for any lack of wholesome foods. I'm talking about the logo. I can't relate to this plain old red and white harbinger of S'awesome anymore. Areola Grande fucked around with this message at 05:42 on Mar 3, 2020 |
# ? Feb 28, 2020 21:29 |
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# ? May 15, 2024 03:04 |
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# ? Feb 28, 2020 21:30 |
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god help us |
# ? Feb 28, 2020 21:33 |
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new wendys breakfast menu and promo campaign: ONE PERFECT GRAPE no explanations, no justifications. go into wendy's for breakfast and the sole option available is ONE PERFECT GRAPE which costs three dollars. ask the tellers what the hell is going on and they are helpless to explain, they know only that it is ONE PERFECT GRAPE for some reason. ask for the manager. she looks somewhat crazed and disheveled because she is constantly getting demands from customers as to what this is. is this performance art? is it a joke? is it the ultimate capitalist scam, building on the success of the impossible whopper to push veganism for profit? she shrugs helplessly. it's a grape, she says, and I guess it is perfect, whatever that means. perfectly normal. do you want the grape or don't you?
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# ? Feb 28, 2020 21:41 |
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one frostyccino and a 5 piece bkfst buff nugg pls |
# ? Feb 28, 2020 21:57 |
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prepuce repurposed posted:one frostyccino and a 5 piece bkfst buff nugg pls *gestures to menu* I am so sorry we are not offering that at the moment. however you do have a choice of any flavor you want, as long as you want grape!
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# ? Feb 28, 2020 22:00 |
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Your senses begin to fade as you are pummeled repeatedly about the face and head, a fist in a vice-like grip is attached to the collar of your shirt. What's going on? How did this happen? Ah, yes- the breakfast- you said something, what was it? Yes! That was it! You said something derogatory about the Wendy's breakfast menu item, and then the beatdown commenced- quickly, say something nice about the breakfast item! "It... good? Bweakfis GOOD!." You manage to spit out the words, along with a few teeth- and the beating stops! You just might live to try another Wendy's breakfast menu item! When the swelling goes down, and you can feel your tongue again. For now, sleep and rest. When you regain consciousness you will have plenty of time to contemplate your next meal. |
# ? Feb 28, 2020 22:26 |
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That's the cosmic horror required to keep mortal souls at bay when they travel too far.
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# ? Feb 28, 2020 23:10 |
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repost this if the Wendy's breakfast menu has allowed u to accept that beef is for breakfast now |
# ? Feb 29, 2020 00:55 |
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Seriously. For real. You will love this breakfast. If you take one bite, and the first words out of your mouth are not a binding oath forsaking your job, your family, and any god you might have once worshipped in favor of our breakfast, we will just be like, wtf. If you taste our breakfast and are not driven to madly stuff yourself with beef and bacon until you die of intestinal rupture like an overfed goldfish, we will stand there, mouths agape, absolutely unable to process this unthinkable turn of events, and hand you a coupon for a free small Frosty. Guaranteed. |
# ? Feb 29, 2020 01:17 |
prepuce repurposed posted:god help us i'll have ~15 |
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# ? Feb 29, 2020 01:38 |
# ? Feb 29, 2020 01:39 |
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the similarity is a striking one |
# ? Feb 29, 2020 01:45 |
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Don't give me that look, you know that I didn't really lobby Wendy's for months after the last thread to make this really happen, it was just a joke post and
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# ? Feb 29, 2020 03:02 |
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"I actually prefer chilaquiles" Dave Thomas a bloated corpse burst out of the ground and shuffles towards me. "Breakfast. Bacon. ATOR!" his accursed voice howls at me |
# ? Feb 29, 2020 05:13 |
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# ? Feb 29, 2020 05:18 |
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hometown smiles serving u up a tall glass of OJ w/ur steamin platter of biscuits n Dave's triple fresh never frozen beef quadrilaterals drowned in country au jus gravy like Dave intended |
# ? Feb 29, 2020 05:50 |
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Morning, noon, and night, for all meals and snacks, I must consume Dave's beef squares with bacon. I wake up early and wander the streets disheveled, looking for a Wendy's open in the morning. I know it's futile, the reason I normally sleep until noon, but I can think of nothing else to do. My tongue screaming for the salty relief that only Wendy's can provide when, up ahead, what's this? A Wendy's with it's lights on? Is this a mirage? A deranged hallucination leaking from my chuck and pork starved brain? I stumble forward in a daze, my hands reaching forward, clutching at the impossible. I reach the door half expecting to hit either nothing but air or the stuff resistance of a locked door. But no! It opens! I see the sign. It reads "Breakfast Baconator". A weep. I have reached providence.
Escape From Noise fucked around with this message at 06:58 on Feb 29, 2020 |
# ? Feb 29, 2020 06:51 |
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SweetWillyRollbar posted:Morning, noon, and night, for all meals and snacks, I must consume Dave's beef squares with bacon. I wake up early and wander the streets disheveled, looking for a Wendy's open in the morning. I know it's futile, the reason I normally sleep until noon, but I can think of nothing else to do. My tongue screaming for the salty relief that only Wendy's can provide when, up ahead, what's this? A Wendy's with it's lights on? Is this a mirage? A deranged hallucination leaking from my chuck and pork starved brain? I stumble forward in a daze, my hands reaching forward, clutching at the impossible. I reach the door half expecting to hit either nothing but air or the stuff resistance of a locked door. But no! It opens! I see the sign. It reads "Breakfast Baconator". A weep. I have reached providence. the absolute cruelty of living without ready access to a wendys. those poor souls for whom breakfast is impossible, at least by any reasonable definition. good lord, if they cant even get breakfast what must it be like when it comes to lunch or dinner. what must it be like I plead, tears running dowm my cheeks, what must it be like
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# ? Feb 29, 2020 07:42 |
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Manifisto posted:the absolute cruelty of living without ready access to a wendys. those poor souls for whom breakfast is impossible, at least by any reasonable definition. good lord, if they cant even get breakfast what must it be like when it comes to lunch or dinner. what must it be like I plead, tears running dowm my cheeks, what must it be like |
# ? Feb 29, 2020 10:28 |
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eating breakfast, brunch, lunch and fifthmeal at Wendy’s is the new world order. dinner is found only at ihop |
# ? Feb 29, 2020 15:01 |
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what the gently caress is going on with the fine print here |
# ? Feb 29, 2020 17:36 |
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prepuce repurposed posted:what the gently caress is going on with the fine print here That's aimed at those people in the world that wake up every day thinking to themselves, "what am i going to get today for nothing, because I'm in the mood for a free lunch!" Those kinds of people ruin it for the rest of us https://i.imgur.com/QKTkerO.mp4 |
# ? Feb 29, 2020 18:24 |
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It feels like the entire marketing team of Wendy's is one
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# ? Feb 29, 2020 19:22 |
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Goons Are Great posted:It feels like the entire marketing team of Wendy's is one lol |
# ? Feb 29, 2020 19:33 |
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Goons Are Great posted:It feels like the entire marketing team of Wendy's is one brand engagement is legit sinister because it actually works. even if you're making fun of it you're still talking about it. as for me, I only patronize fast food restaurants who don't mess around with brand engagement, such as made you look
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# ? Feb 29, 2020 19:39 |
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Imagine having your entire brand taken over by the wannabe comedian who runs your corporate Twitter account. |
# ? Feb 29, 2020 20:09 |
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Hi I'm Dave Thomas, notes down-home fast food restaurateur and philanthropist. I'm passionate about adoption and what a loving stupid moron you are if you ever let a frozen burger touch your ungloved hands or try to pull a fast one with our superficially liberal satisfaction guarantee. |
# ? Feb 29, 2020 20:17 |
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byob project: give us your brand give us full control, no limits, no holds barred. we will engage for you. we'll need a pile of money tho.
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# ? Feb 29, 2020 20:23 |
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Manifisto posted:byob project: give us your brand our resume? please refer to our prior wendys thread, also the one about smuggling a whole ham (sponsored by hormel?)
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# ? Feb 29, 2020 20:25 |
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Manifisto posted:byob project: give us your brand The International House of Whatever the gently caress We Want and You'll LIKE it! #IHoWtFWWaYLI |
# ? Feb 29, 2020 20:37 |
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Manifisto posted:byob project: give us your brand After fourteen months of hard work, massive amounts of posts, sixty nine goldmined threads and thirty ads to ask ButtTheShitmanFart to post with us, we proudly present your new line of product and corresponding slogan: Wendy's Hotdogs. Because boners.
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# ? Feb 29, 2020 20:40 |
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Goons Are Great posted:After fourteen months of hard work, massive amounts of posts, sixty nine goldmined threads and thirty ads to ask ButtTheShitmanFart to post with us, we proudly present your new line of product and corresponding slogan: I'm not sure about this. According to our focus groups, today's young people are more into butts than boners.
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# ? Feb 29, 2020 21:28 |
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Manifisto posted:brand engagement is legit sinister because it actually works. even if you're making fun of it you're still talking about it. as for me, I only patronize fast food restaurants who don't mess around with brand engagement, such as made you look that's true |
# ? Feb 29, 2020 21:43 |
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Barking Gecko posted:I'm not sure about this. According to our focus groups, today's young people are more into butts than boners. No problem, the byob marketing group is already on it and I can tell you to check out the freshest redesign of our bagels to cover both groups of interest.
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# ? Feb 29, 2020 21:47 |
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wendys management: well this new pastel color scheme is . . . striking I guess, and redoing all of our menus in comic sans is certainly distinctive. the hammock kittens in the corner are a really good idea, everyone loves kittens. but not everybody likes reggae music I'm sorry to say, especially not the same song played over and over, and some of our patrons feel extremely uncomfortable about being quizzed about hobbies, pets, and crimes when they place an order. it's the "crimes" part that's a problem I think, they assume it's a joke but they're not entirely sure.
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# ? Feb 29, 2020 21:54 |
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Jim, I'm sorry, but I don't think people in our test markets liked the slogan "Hurf de durf, it's Wendy's breakfast time." |
# ? Feb 29, 2020 22:08 |
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the beef rear end the frosty ape EggTheCheeseHamShart |
# ? Feb 29, 2020 22:15 |
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Hometown Smiles, every day, whether you want them or not. That's Wendy's breakfast menu. |
# ? Feb 29, 2020 22:18 |
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# ? May 15, 2024 03:04 |
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also what the gently caress is a burriot and why are they at the top of every menu
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# ? Feb 29, 2020 22:21 |