UKMT March 2020 - Bojo got the Covo - The Something Awful Forums

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Debate & Discussion > UKMT March 2020 - Bojo got the Covo

Who is your first pick in the deputy leadership race? This poll is closed.
R. Allin-Khan	6	1.60%
R. Burgon	80	21.33%
D. Butler	72	19.20%
A. Rayner	35	9.33%
I. Murray	5	1.33%
P. Flaps	177	47.20%
Total:	375 votes

[Edit Poll (moderators only)]

Julio Cruz: May 19, 2006

Junior G-man posted:

Make all SA posters use their own name. It's the only way forward.

some of us are way ahead of you

# ? Mar 3, 2020 16:38

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# ? May 24, 2024 03:16

Junior G-man: Sep 15, 2004; Wrapped in a mystery, inside an enigma

JeremoudCorbynejad posted:

A smug grin spreads across Mike Crotch's face

I always assumed you were using yours.

# ? Mar 3, 2020 16:38

Sanitary Naptime: May 29, 2006; MIWK!

I�ve already got Royal Mail records of Mr S Naptime Esq thanks to Pilch, and because this was delivered through the use of a corporation embossed with a crown I decree that the sovereign name of the boat that is free soul is now legally Sanitary Naptime.

Don�t @ me because it�s illegal to use a legal name

# ? Mar 3, 2020 16:44

Gonzo McFee: Jun 19, 2010

https://twitter.com/SkyNews/status/1234801752156835840

Don't... don't do that.

Do not shake hands with people who are really sick.

Even if you wash your hands it's no guarantee.

I can't believe that's something that has to be said.

# ? Mar 3, 2020 16:45

Junior G-man: Sep 15, 2004; Wrapped in a mystery, inside an enigma

Sanitary Naptime posted:

I�ve already got Royal Mail records of Mr S Naptime Esq thanks to Pilch, and because this was delivered through the use of a corporation embossed with a crown I decree that the sovereign name of the boat that is free soul is now legally Sanitary Naptime.

Don�t @ me because it�s illegal to use a legal name

Do you accept packages with fringes?

# ? Mar 3, 2020 16:47

Junior G-man: Sep 15, 2004; Wrapped in a mystery, inside an enigma

Good FT roundup of the Magic Trade Deals that await Free Brittania The Great Power:

quote:

Waiting for the golden age of Brexit trade deals
The UK government continues to emit an overpowering fog of promises about non-European agreements

Writing in July 2016 after the UK�s vote to leave the EU, David Davis, the Conservative government�s first secretary of state for Brexit, foretold a golden age of global trade deals.

�I would expect the negotiation phase of most of them to be concluded within 12 to 24 months,� he�predicted breezily.

More than three-and-a-half years after Mr Davis�s fact-free forecast, the government continues to emit an overpowering fog of promises about non-European trade deals.

If it were possible to monetise these promises, we would all be rich by now.

What is the reality behind the propaganda?

In a new�booklet published by the UK�s international trade department, official statistics show that EU countries accounted in 2018 for 49.1 per cent of British trade, valued at �659.5bn, and non-EU countries for the rest, valued at �683.3bn.

Seven EU countries (Germany, the Netherlands, France, Ireland, Spain, Belgium and Italy) and Switzerland were among the UK�s top 10 trading partners. The US was the largest, and China was the fifth largest.

Despite the EU�s prominence in British trade, Prime Minister Boris Johnson�s government plans to�detach the UK as far as possible from continental Europe in terms of regulatory standards and legal frameworks.

The other side of this coin is the pursuit of�deals with the US, China and other large non-European economies.

Some, such as Japan, already have extensive trade and investment ties with the UK. But Japanese business executives sound gloomy.

�Essentially, the United Kingdom�s departure [from the EU] is nothing positive for the Japanese companies doing business there, so the focus going forward is how much the negative impact is alleviated,� Akio Mimura, chairman of the Japan Chamber of Commerce and Industry,�said last month.

Like others in Asia, executives in Tokyo say they cannot set precise goals for a UK trade deal until they know the details of London�s post-Brexit relationship with the EU.

Professor�Rana Mitter, a leading authority on modern China, said few countries had a comprehensive trade accord with Beijing. Those that do � Australia is an example � usually have products, such as minerals or advanced machinery, that make a deal attractive to the Chinese.

�The UK doesn�t have one obvious sector that China sees as of compelling benefit to its own interests, so a deal is unlikely to be agreed quickly,� said Prof Mitter.

On the other hand, some Chinese specialists say a trade deal would make the UK more dependent on China, and so London might become more willing to speak up for Beijing�s interests in international forums.�

For the Johnson government, the larger point is that the dynamics of world trade have changed since Mr Davis�s insouciant optimism of 2016.

President Donald Trump is not only committed to an �America first� trade policy but wants its allies, including the UK, to join it in taking a�tough line against China for national security reasons.

A�furious row erupted between Washington and London over Mr Johnson�s decision to let Huawei, the Chinese telecoms company, play a partial role in developing the UK�s 5G cellular networks.

Other frictions are emerging over London�s plans for�taxes on digital services, the Trump administration�s threats to impose tariffs on car imports and the UK�s quiet support for the Iranian nuclear deal, which Mr Trump abhors.

Moreover, a close look at the US�negotiating objectives for a trade deal indicates that Washington has its eyes on drawing London into its regulatory orbit.

In a government press release last weekend, Mr Johnson�was quoted as predicting that �our two great nations� would be �trading Scottish smoked salmon for Stetson hats�.

It was admirably faithful to the jaunty spirit of the now forgotten Mr Davis.

# ? Mar 3, 2020 16:50

Sanitary Naptime: May 29, 2006; MIWK!

Gonzo McFee posted:

https://twitter.com/SkyNews/status/1234801752156835840

Don't... don't do that.

Do not shake hands with people who are really sick.

Even if you wash your hands it's no guarantee.

I can't believe that's something that has to be said.

No, let him.

# ? Mar 3, 2020 17:02

Microplastics: Jul 6, 2007; It's what's for dinner.

Gonzo McFee posted:

https://twitter.com/SkyNews/status/1234801752156835840

Don't... don't do that.

Do not shake hands with people who are really sick.

Even if you wash your hands it's no guarantee.

I can't believe that's something that has to be said.

The key to defeating the virus is to assert dominance when you first come into contact with it. When shaking the hand of an infected person, grasp it firmly and don't let go. Get into their personal space and make yourself look really big to intimidate the virus. Lick the objects in the room to show they belong to you and not the virus.

# ? Mar 3, 2020 17:05

Lt. Danger: Dec 22, 2006; jolly good chaps we sure showed the hun

Actually, viruses are usually more afraid of you than you are of them

# ? Mar 3, 2020 17:06

OwlFancier: Aug 22, 2013

Stand with your legs apart to intimidate the virus and also allow clearance to poo poo yourself when you catch it.

# ? Mar 3, 2020 17:06

sebzilla: Mar 17, 2009; Kid's blasting everything in sight with that new-fangled musket.

# ? Mar 3, 2020 17:06

Microplastics: Jul 6, 2007; It's what's for dinner.

Lt. Danger posted:

Actually, viruses are usually more afraid of you than you are of them

If the virus spots you, stay perfectly still. Viruses can only see movement.

# ? Mar 3, 2020 17:10

Gonzo McFee: Jun 19, 2010

Sanitary Naptime posted:

No, let him.

Smearing my face in poo poo and licking the toilet seats of every hospital I see, to own the libs.

# ? Mar 3, 2020 17:11

Microplastics: Jul 6, 2007; It's what's for dinner.

The "doctors" say it only takes one virus to get inside you and start replicating, but how can that be possible? You need a male and a female.

# ? Mar 3, 2020 17:16

ThomasPaine: Feb 4, 2009; We have no compassion and we ask no compassion from you. When our turn comes, we shall not make excuses for the terror.

Coohoolin posted:

I mean kinda but phrasing it like that makes it seem like those three phases are all equally morally condemnable, which is a highly questionable and probably disrespectful implication to make. As bad as a the rent situation in Dublin or Galway is I'm not sure it's quite as bad as what was inflicted on Ireland by British rule.

I'm not making any equivalences, just pointing out that the idea that independence from the UK = any great leap towards the socialist utopia is very dumb

# ? Mar 3, 2020 17:18

Bardeh: Dec 2, 2004; Fun Shoe

I've taped up my bumhole, nostrils, mouth, and eyes. There's no way for the virus to get in. It's just common sense.

# ? Mar 3, 2020 17:21

Microplastics: Jul 6, 2007; It's what's for dinner.

Bardeh posted:

I've taped up my bumhole, nostrils, mouth, and eyes. There's no way for the virus to get in. It's just common sense.

I'm operating a points-based infection system so that only the best viruses get in.

# ? Mar 3, 2020 17:23

Overminty: Mar 16, 2010; You may wonder what I am doing while reading your posts..

Bardeh posted:

I've taped up my bumhole, nostrils, mouth, and eyes. There's no way for the virus to get in. It's just common sense.

There's still one hole you haven't accounted for :dong:

e: wait you said eyes my bad

# ? Mar 3, 2020 17:24

Jedit: Dec 10, 2011; Proudly supporting vanilla legends 1994-2014

ThomasPaine posted:

I'm not making any equivalences, just pointing out that the idea that independence from the UK = any great leap towards the socialist utopia is very dumb

I don't give a poo poo if Independent Scotland is socialist, neoliberal or a gaylepertapdancingnunarchy. I only care that it is in the EU, so I have improved options for getting out of it.

# ? Mar 3, 2020 17:29

big scary monsters: Sep 2, 2011; -~Ｓｋｕｌｌｗａｖｅ~-

Given previous discussion ITT about how many people are posting trouserless I am forced to imagine shoes-in-house weirdos coming home, removing their shoes, removing their trousers, and then putting their shoes back on before sitting down barelegged at their posting stations.

I usually just wander around the house in socks or with my nude feed proudly on display, but we have "house shoes" available for guests who want to shield theirs from unwanted gazes.

# ? Mar 3, 2020 17:42

Guavanaut: Nov 27, 2009; Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998; Toilet Rascal

big scary monsters posted:

my nude feed proudly on display

Do you want me to add the link to the OP?

# ? Mar 3, 2020 17:44

mehall: Aug 27, 2010

My feet get cold, so I'm always wearing slippers and socks.

# ? Mar 3, 2020 17:44

Pesky Splinter: Feb 16, 2011; A worried pug.

Bardeh posted:

I've taped up my bumhole, nostrils, mouth, and eyes. There's no way for the virus to get in. It's just common sense.

They laughed at my full-body latex gimp suit. But who's laughing now! :zoid:

# ? Mar 3, 2020 17:48

Guavanaut: Nov 27, 2009; Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998; Toilet Rascal

Pesky Splinter posted:

They laughed at my full-body latex gimp suit. But who's laughing now!

Guavanaut posted:

The old Soviet treated rubber ones should be good for most chemical hazards for decades if you duct tape any ingress points, with the downside that they're completely non-breathable

"It's not a sex thing" I say as I duct tape myself into the full body rubber suit.

# ? Mar 3, 2020 17:52

big scary monsters: Sep 2, 2011; -~Ｓｋｕｌｌｗａｖｅ~-

Guavanaut posted:

Do you want me to add the link to the OP?

List it under podescasts.

# ? Mar 3, 2020 17:52

keep punching joe: Jan 22, 2006; Die Satan!

Checking in to just say that I hope Boris Johnson dies of Corona viruses.

# ? Mar 3, 2020 17:52

Azza Bamboo: Apr 7, 2018; THUNDERDOME LOSER 2021

Iran has biological weapons, we should invade.

# ? Mar 3, 2020 17:54

OwlFancier: Aug 22, 2013

We can make our own, we don't need to take theirs.

# ? Mar 3, 2020 17:55

Microplastics: Jul 6, 2007; It's what's for dinner.

The best way to get infected by the Corona virus is to leave the slice of lime in the neck when you drink it.

# ? Mar 3, 2020 17:58

Bardeh: Dec 2, 2004; Fun Shoe

All these stories about hand sanitiser selling out everywhere, but isn't a plain old bar of soap supposed to be better at preventing spread?

# ? Mar 3, 2020 18:10

big scary monsters: Sep 2, 2011; -~Ｓｋｕｌｌｗａｖｅ~-

JeremoudCorbynejad posted:

The best way to get infected by the Corona virus is to leave the slice of lime in the neck when you drink it.

Viral marketing has gone too far this time.

# ? Mar 3, 2020 18:11

Jaeluni Asjil: Apr 18, 2018; Sorry I thought you were a landlord when I gave you your old avatar!

Bardeh posted:

All these stories about hand sanitiser selling out everywhere, but isn't a plain old bar of soap supposed to be better at preventing spread?

I think it's intended for those times when you don't have access to soap and water (eg if travelling and the tap in the bog on the coach or train or dodgy cafe doesn't emit water).
Also there was something about alcohol killing the viruses - haven't kept up with all the rumours so not sure what happened to that one.

# ? Mar 3, 2020 18:12

Darth Walrus: Feb 13, 2012

https://twitter.com/theharryshearer/status/1234881188650573825?s=21

lol holy poo poo

# ? Mar 3, 2020 18:23

ThomasPaine: Feb 4, 2009; We have no compassion and we ask no compassion from you. When our turn comes, we shall not make excuses for the terror.

Jedit posted:

I don't give a poo poo if Independent Scotland is socialist, neoliberal or a gaylepertapdancingnunarchy. I only care that it is in the EU, so I have improved options for getting out of it.

This is quite a take

# ? Mar 3, 2020 18:29

bessantj: Jul 27, 2004

Darth Walrus posted:

https://twitter.com/theharryshearer/status/1234881188650573825?s=21

lol holy poo poo

Tonight we ask "Are we expecting less from our politicians?"

# ? Mar 3, 2020 18:31

forkboy84: Jun 13, 2012; Corgis love bread. And Puro

Jedit posted:

I don't give a poo poo if Independent Scotland is socialist, neoliberal or a gaylepertapdancingnunarchy. I only care that it is in the EU, so I have improved options for getting out of it.

That's some real FYGM poo poo

# ? Mar 3, 2020 18:47

Ms Adequate: Oct 30, 2011; Baby even when I'm dead and gone
You will always be my only one, my only one
When the night is calling
No matter who I become
You will always be my only one, my only one, my only one
When the night is calling

*Rubs her feet sensually all over everyone's faces*

# ? Mar 3, 2020 19:15

OwlFancier: Aug 22, 2013

That's impressive levels of dexterity cos if I tried that I'd just kick people in the nose.

# ? Mar 3, 2020 19:19

NotJustANumber99: Feb 15, 2012; somehow that last av was even worse than your posting

Jedit posted:

I don't give a poo poo if Independent Scotland is socialist, neoliberal or a gaylepertapdancingnunarchy. I only care that it is in the EU, so I have improved options for getting out of it.

Same but so I can be an even bigger poo poo and do like that Irish thing and reclaim my EUness through family relations.

# ? Mar 3, 2020 19:20

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# ? May 24, 2024 03:16

Ms Adequate: Oct 30, 2011; Baby even when I'm dead and gone
You will always be my only one, my only one
When the night is calling
No matter who I become
You will always be my only one, my only one, my only one
When the night is calling

OwlFancier posted:

That's impressive levels of dexterity cos if I tried that I'd just kick people in the nose.

Through horny, all things are possible.

# ? Mar 3, 2020 19:27

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