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Augus
Mar 9, 2015


Flavius Aetass posted:

situation:

went to take a poo poo at work, wiped the seat down, flushed the toilet, and sat down

the toilet won't stop flushing and it's splashing water on my parts. I don't want gross water and piss on me so I stand up a bit to let it finish

I then remember that I am currently pissing and look down to see it going all over my pants and shoes

please send help

I feel bad for your pants but this is tremendous content

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Mayor Dave
Feb 20, 2009

Bernie the Snow Clown
https://twitter.com/realDonaldTrump/status/1235604572850343937?s=19

ex post facho
Oct 25, 2007
if you having poop problem I feel bad for trump son

got 99 problems but Liz ain't one

Gringostar
Nov 12, 2016
Morbid Hound
TRuMP

Flavius Aetass
Mar 30, 2011
back at my desk pretending everything is okay and trying to look busy so people don't walk in

Gringostar
Nov 12, 2016
Morbid Hound

this is going to age like a fine wine and may end up being a top 5 tweet

Mayor Dave
Feb 20, 2009

Bernie the Snow Clown

Flavius Aetass posted:

situation:

went to take a poo poo at work, wiped the seat down, flushed the toilet, and sat down

the toilet won't stop flushing and it's splashing water on my parts. I don't want gross water and piss on me so I stand up a bit to let it finish

I then remember that I am currently pissing and look down to see it going all over my pants and shoes

please send help

euphronius
Feb 18, 2009

uh borders are wide open there mate

Augus
Mar 9, 2015



lmao

RealityWarCriminal
Aug 10, 2016

:o:

129 cases and 11 deaths is an 8.5% death rate

cargo cult
Aug 28, 2008

by Reene
WE hold these truths to be self evident: alllllll mennnnnawommmen are created by the..... you know the thingg!

BeefThief
Aug 8, 2007


keeping the numbers low while people continue to get infected and subsequently die

LegoMan
Mar 17, 2002

ting ting ting

College Slice

Flavius Aetass posted:

back at my desk pretending everything is okay and trying to look busy so people don't walk in

Pee smell is a natural repellent

Basebf555
Feb 29, 2008

The greatest sensual pleasure there is is to know the desires of another!

Fun Shoe

Seems like a particularly dumb time to gloat but I guess it's not surprising.

cargo cult
Aug 28, 2008

by Reene

eric ciaramella posted:

129 cases and 11 deaths is an 8.5% death rate
yeah because its slaughtering boomers. its like 20%+ if you're 70 an older

yorkinshire
Apr 28, 2009

In space no one can hear your dope beats.

ex post facho posted:

if you having poop problem I feel bad for trump son

got 99 problems but Liz ain't one

Poop dropped out my butt this morning and it felt prophetic.

Happy Noodle Boy
Jul 3, 2002


trump?

Inspector Hound
Jul 14, 2003

DryGoods posted:

who are you going to endorse?

i'll keep it a secret

Dr Grant's a coward I'm endorsing Jurassic Park

a peck of pickled peckers
Aug 3, 2014

I am your Redeemer! It is by my hand that you arise from the ashes of this world!

LegoMan posted:

Pee smell is a natural repellent

As a NYC resident I can say that this is not true

RealityWarCriminal
Aug 10, 2016

:o:
trump yesterday said the death rate was below 1%

BeefThief
Aug 8, 2007

TEXT...CORONAVIRUS...TO...6...9-9...6-9

cumshitter
Sep 27, 2005

by Fluffdaddy
im all onboard for biden. in fac,t ive always supported biden because i always knew he would win. go biden! bide or die!

Zerg Mans
Oct 19, 2006

cargo cult posted:

yeah because its slaughtering boomers. its like 20%+ if you're 70 an older

coronavirus good?

Not a Children
Oct 9, 2012

Don't need a holster if you never stop shooting.


lmao in 2 months when retirement communities are being ravaged we can look back on this and laugh and laugh and laugh

Bethamphetamine
Oct 29, 2012

If he's admitting 11 deaths...

Dr_0ctag0n
Apr 25, 2015


The whole human race
sentenced
to
burn

Karl Rove please report to Central Park for processing

Inspector Hound
Jul 14, 2003

Can we get some infection predictions and death rates all together to just stare at because napkin math on the last ones gave me like 80 million

DryGoods
Apr 26, 2014

Dogs, on the other hand, can connect with that pathos.

cumshitter posted:

im all onboard for biden. in fac,t ive always supported biden because i always knew he would win. go biden! bide or die!

this time come October 2020, cspam is going to be, Bernie Who?


so it goes

Sudden Loud Noise
Feb 18, 2007

eric ciaramella posted:

129 cases and 11 deaths is an 8.5% death rate

Yeah, but only because we don't take care of our citizens!

The vaccine is going to be Affordable!

Dr_0ctag0n
Apr 25, 2015


The whole human race
sentenced
to
burn

cargo cult posted:

yeah because its slaughtering boomers. its like 20%+ if you're 70 an older

Or it's because the incubation period is super long and there are actually thousands more infected that are not showing symptoms yet.

Another Bill
Sep 27, 2018

Born on the bayou
died in a cave
bbq and posting
is all I crave

Bethamphetamine posted:

If he's admitting 11 deaths...

I just thought about what's going to happen when the virus gets into those concentration camps America's running CRACK *ping*

aware of dog
Nov 14, 2016
if you think about it, life has a 100% mortality rate

CODChimera
Jan 29, 2009

Bethamphetamine posted:

If he's admitting 11 deaths...

ask him again an hour from now

Dustcat
Jan 26, 2019

i'm glad president strint was smart enough to close our borders and then bring in sick people and now we have the disease inside our borders and also the president has a hunch that the fatality rate is under 1% with 11 people dead out of 145 sick

Bethamphetamine
Oct 29, 2012

Another Bill posted:

I just thought about what's going to happen when the virus gets into those concentration camps America's running CRACK *ping*

working as intended. once they show signs of being filthy diseased animals the final solution becomes necessary and compassionate. When the time comes, the mass graves will be the kindest thing to do for the children and their parents.

Bethamphetamine
Oct 29, 2012

In any democracy, genocide is never more than 4 years away

veepfake
Oct 21, 2005


for the last 14.5 years or so i've generally been a lurker becaus ei've been too afraid to post but i've recently realized that kind of thinking was probably prety stupid. anyway now that i've gone and am still going through what feels like the worst 14 months of my life i just wanted to say thanks to everyone who is and used to be here for helping me keep sane, i couldnt' have done it without the posts. looking forward to posting with you guys more in the future maybe

edit: fyi i didnt realize i had terrible opinions until 2017 and didn't see the reasoning behind they were dumb until around late 2018

veepfake has issued a correction as of 18:36 on Mar 5, 2020

DryGoods
Apr 26, 2014

Dogs, on the other hand, can connect with that pathos.

veepfake posted:

for the last 14.5 years or so i've generally been a lurker becaus ei've been too afraid to post but i've recently realized that kind of thinking was probably prety stupid. anyway now that i've gone and am still going through what feels like the worst 14 months of my life i just wanted to say thanks to everyone who is and used to be here for helping me keep sane, i couldnt' have done it without the posts. looking forward to posting with you guys more in the future maybe

post a "Trump"

show me what you got

veepfake
Oct 21, 2005


DryGoods posted:

post a "Trump"

show me what you got

turmp

turmp

i tried it twice an got the same thing

edit: turimpo

veepfake has issued a correction as of 18:01 on Mar 5, 2020

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yorkinshire
Apr 28, 2009

In space no one can hear your dope beats.
https://twitter.com/EoinHiggins_/status/1235607568799731713?s=19

Troarmp

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