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Anias posted:Dick Rahl is The Paladin of Shadows. Oh, poo poo, the next book is Phantom, not Ghost. I was almost there. Both Ringo and Goodkind love their rape scenes though, so you can see how I would be confused.
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Mar 7, 2020 08:54
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super spoilers, half remembered the book of counted shadows that richard memorized is fake. there are three copies of the book of counted shadows that are all slightly different that are designed specifically to only be deciphered by richard. the books are all bullshit and the sword is the only way to know how to pick the right box
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Mar 7, 2020 09:05
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So much effort for a situation where you have a 33% chance of guessing right just by, you know, guessing.
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Mar 7, 2020 12:18
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Mymla posted:So much effort for a situation where you have a 33% chance of guessing right just by, you know, guessing. Doesn't one of the boxes basically let Satan take over the world? Wizards are Hella dumb but it feels like they built in a pretty good incentive not to guess.
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Mar 7, 2020 15:35
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violent sex idiot posted:super spoilers, half remembered the book of counted shadows that richard memorized is fake. there are three copies of the book of counted shadows that are all slightly different that are designed specifically to only be deciphered by richard. the books are all bullshit and the sword is the only way to know how to pick the right box That's more or less it, yes. It's a bit clever, but also bad, and I will write about this at lengths when Scoob gets to this point later. jassi007 posted:Doesn't one of the boxes basically let Satan take over the world? Wizards are Hella dumb but it feels like they built in a pretty good incentive not to guess. I'd get at that from a different angle. So you have this basically reality destroying spell that erases one person from the memories of all people, and causes a chain reaction that will unmake existence or something like that. What do you design as a countermeasure? What, of course you create three boxes, of which one kills all live in creation, and one makes a person god. So first, you have to hope that the person trying to undo the Chainfire spell can be trusted with basically unlimited power. And you must also hope that your precious Book of Counted Shadows doesn't get destroyed, or lost, or something. Otherwise, the person that tries to save reality from Chainfire has a one in three chance of just killing all life anyway. Let's just hope you enchanted the Book of Counted Shadows to be hard to destroy... What's that? It's easily flammable? Whelp.
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Mar 7, 2020 16:38
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Guess we should ban fire!!!
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Mar 7, 2020 16:39
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silvergoose posted:Guess we should ban fire!!! Wow, what a twist. Michael was the hero the world needed all along.
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Mar 7, 2020 16:42
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Torrannor posted:Wow, what a twist. Michael was the hero the world needed all along. It's perfect.
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Mar 7, 2020 16:49
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Mymla posted:So much effort for a situation where you have a 33% chance of guessing right just by, you know, guessing. I thought it was impossible to pick the right box without doing some bullshit like move one of them slightly to the left before choosing.
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Mar 7, 2020 17:03
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I found the Book of Counted Shadows.
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Mar 7, 2020 18:02
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Who What Now posted:I thought it was impossible to pick the right box without doing some bullshit like move one of them slightly to the left before choosing. I'm going purely from memory, but I think those things are only to make the boxes cast their shadows. You then need the Book of Counted Shadows to chose the box that casts one/two/three shadows. I remember Richard being bummed that Darken Rahl already removed the cover from at least one box. I'm not sure if you can open the boxes in that situation already, if you like gambling on the 33% chance, but I think you can.
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Mar 7, 2020 19:03
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My best friend loves dumb fantasy and hasn't really put a lot of thought into analyzing it, but when I was mocking him the other day for reading Rothfuss (it didn't take him long to realize how bad Rothfuss was at least) I made a comment about how sometimes I just can't separate art from artist when the artist clearly believes the dumb poo poo he puts on paper, and he goes "oh, like Terry Goodkind" and almost as one we both said "yeah, gently caress off into the sun, Terry" and spent 20 minutes talking about how god-awful everything about SoT is I'm really glad I've only read the books through the medium of Scoob because there's no way I'd get through this poo poo alone
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Mar 7, 2020 19:20
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Who What Now posted:I thought it was impossible to pick the right box without doing some bullshit like move one of them slightly to the left before choosing. IIRC, The "trick" is that you have to use the Sword of Truth. It's literally a key. Without it, even if you open the right Box, you're gonna have a Bad Time.
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Mar 7, 2020 22:24
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Isn't the sword basically just a divining rod for them, too? No weird magic visualizations sand rituals, just "hold sword over boxes and it lights up for the right box".
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Mar 7, 2020 22:27
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Khizan posted:Isn't the sword basically just a divining rod for them, too? No weird magic visualizations sand rituals, just "hold sword over boxes and it lights up for the right box". Yes, as we will see in the last chapters of the last book of the regular series. Why are we spoiling this needlessly?
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Mar 7, 2020 22:51
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Probably because it's always a crapshoot if I'm going to keep updating with momentum or vanish for a year at a time, moreso between books.
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Mar 7, 2020 23:03
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Well and honestly these books are so hosed someone could post that everything is solved by jagang and richard pulling out their balls (no dicks only balls) while kahlan and nicci compare them and announced richard was the winner and the shame forced jagang to kill himself and I would go "yeah checks out"
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Mar 7, 2020 23:10
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alright richard pull your balls out of your boxers of orden and lets have the ladies decide who gets to be the god and who doesnt
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Mar 7, 2020 23:15
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kalvanoo posted:boxers of orden I think it speaks to the general age of everyone who loves and/or creates these books that a quick search tells me nobody made these to sell for a dollar.
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Mar 7, 2020 23:20
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If we can petition a mod for a title change, 'boxers of orden' has to be in it somehow.
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Mar 7, 2020 23:49
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Stravag posted:Well and honestly these books are so hosed someone could post that everything is solved by jagang and richard pulling out their balls (no dicks only balls) while kahlan and nicci compare them and announced richard was the winner and the shame forced jagang to kill himself and I would go "yeah checks out" Where do you think "Bags!" came from?
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Mar 8, 2020 02:16
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END ME SCOOB posted:I think it speaks to the general age of everyone who loves and/or creates these books that a quick search tells me nobody made these to sell for a dollar. doe your bulge cast one, two or three shadows? order your official ObjectiveGear boxers of orden to find out
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Mar 8, 2020 02:23
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the bad box has to destroy all life forever as balance for thr good box being you are God. remember when Richard entered the temple of lightning or whatever the gently caress like five books ago and learned so much he was effortlessly capable of recreating the sword of truth, which is part of the counter to chainfire. dicky rahl didn't need all this convoluted bullshit the ancient wizards njst had to make his dad not be so antisocial
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Mar 8, 2020 03:05
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Wait if one box kills everything and one box makes you god does the third box just... not do anything?
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Mar 8, 2020 03:17
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It just kills you
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Mar 8, 2020 03:20
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Well these boxes suck. I want a refund
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Mar 8, 2020 03:41
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I just remembered the time Richard almost ended the world because he made his wife cum.
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Mar 8, 2020 03:43
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UTTERLY RATIONAL (there are rules!)
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Mar 8, 2020 04:04
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Honestly its neat to see so much stuff from the first book come back in the final trilogy, but mainly because the books have been on a downward trajectory since the beginning so its nice to be reminded of a time when things were meerly kinda bad instead of an objectivist nightmare. Also we're going to get the answer to the question 'did Terry forget he put dragons in this series in the first place or is he just embarrassed to have them on the cover of his serious books about people?' also if I remember the ending even a little we're in for some incredible bullshit.
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Mar 8, 2020 04:19
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Who What Now posted:I just remembered the time Richard almost ended the world because he made his wife cum. No, you see, Kahlan thought she was with someone else and dared to try to make the most of a lovely situation she had been forced into, and that is exactly the same as cheating on Richard and breaking his heart. Mr Phillby posted:Honestly its neat to see so much stuff from the first book come back in the final trilogy, but mainly because the books have been on a downward trajectory since the beginning so its nice to be reminded of a time when things were meerly kinda bad instead of an objectivist nightmare. Also we're going to get the answer to the question 'did Terry forget he put dragons in this series in the first place or is he just embarrassed to have them on the cover of his serious books about people?' I'm pretty sure he spends like half a paragraph in Faith of the Fallen (or whichever one it is where Nicci turns good) alluding to the idea that the dragons are probably dead from when the Chimes were loose, since dragons were magical creatures.
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Mar 8, 2020 04:20
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the_steve posted:No, you see, Kahlan thought she was with someone else and dared to try to make the most of a lovely situation she had been forced into, and that is exactly the same as cheating on Richard and breaking his heart. ^^^^ the_steve posted:I'm pretty sure he spends like half a paragraph in Faith of the Fallen (or whichever one it is where Nicci turns good) alluding to the idea that the dragons are probably dead from when the Chimes were loose, since dragons were magical creatures. Yeah I know its just funny that we don't actually see one again until Terry got control of the book covers given how much he apparently hated the big loving dragon they stuck on the front of Wizard's first Rule. Mr Phillby fucked around with this message at 04:40 on Mar 8, 2020 |
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Mar 8, 2020 04:34
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silvergoose posted:Feel free to do some lets read reviews of the other books in that list too When the next update is something non-Goodkind to give me a palate cleanser, you know who to blame. Yes I literally save these posts to call back to later.
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Mar 8, 2020 06:25
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END ME SCOOB posted:When the next update is something non-Goodkind to give me a palate cleanser, you know who to blame. vengeance is a good reason for most dodges
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Mar 8, 2020 07:03
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When goodkind wrote 100 pages about richard being a BDSM slave, I didn't like it, but I didn't mind too much. I did however get pretty weirded out when he wrote a chapter in which kahlan licks her own period blood off richard's dick. It makes you wonder how much of these books were written one-handed.
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Mar 8, 2020 10:59
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Given how hard he gets for his 'ideology', I wager much less than was written with two hands.
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Mar 8, 2020 11:52
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END ME SCOOB posted:When the next update is something non-Goodkind to give me a palate cleanser, you know who to blame. poo poo. gently caress. (by the by if you like trashy romance novels, Shelly Laurenston writes shockingly readable shapeshifter ones)
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Mar 8, 2020 13:16
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I’m a little behind in the thread (one page left to catch up) and just got to the end of the chainfire book. I gotta say I think the idea of the chainfire is pretty cool, and for once I think it makes sense that the wizards: A) Wrote up a treatise on this crap so people would know not to do it B) Made the Boxes of Orden to deal with the problem should it ever come up Too bad they didn’t leave more warnings about the Chainfire laying around, but such is life. I just think it’s nice that Goodkind extrapolated from subtractive magic -> erasing memories -> erasing all memory of something -> destroys the world. This is the kind of fantasy world building I like...magic that is easy to understand but has consequences. WAAY to often I feel like Goodkind’s fantasy is just him making it up as he goes along, which is one of the reasons I got sick of these books. Bringing the discussion back to the Book of Orden, my memory is not only that Richard memorized the only copy, but he was only able to do so because he was gifted. A guy like George Cypher would never be able to memorize it and retain it. OR was George Cypher gifted? These books suck so goddamn bad. So many bullshit things no one in the universe cares about (I’m looking at you mudpeople and Grach) get developed and explored while legit cool poo poo barely gets mentioned or gets covered in a flashback. PLUS all the stupid logical contradictions and flashbacks. I never read it, but does Wheel of Time do better actually using all of its pages to make sense and build a good world?
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Mar 8, 2020 18:05
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Gameko posted:I never read it, but does Wheel of Time do better actually using all of its pages to make sense and build a good world? Hard yes. Full stop. Different regions have a local flavor and culture, other nations have more to them than just "we're you but with wizards/communism", I could go on but those alone are already such a change from this flat loving world where the only time a place has anything interesting about it it's either a giant temple of dead wizards or a parody that will never come up again (LOOKIN' AT YOU, CLINTONIA) Like, making this comparison in my head right now, can you name a single royal or government official in the Goodkind world who wasn't a) related to Kahlan or b) an Order plant? claw game handjob fucked around with this message at 18:19 on Mar 8, 2020 |
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Mar 8, 2020 18:08
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END ME SCOOB posted:Like, making this comparison in my head right now, can you name a single royal or government official in the Wheel of Time world who wasn't a) related to Kahlan or b) an Order plant? All of them? 
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Mar 8, 2020 18:17
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Good point. Christ I need coffee before this recording.
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Mar 8, 2020 18:19
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