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BIG TIT LIL NIP posted:Everyone seems to be taking two weeks off except for my school which wants us back at the hospitals on 23rd this month. I just don't see it happening. My facility closed all 6 schools and is going 100% online as of Monday until further notice. HugeGrossBurrito posted:Does Coronavirus have any effect on poopin? If you get just enough Roni, it will form a perfect sheath around the turd and it will slide out without residue and go down without flushing
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Mar 14, 2020 18:52
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a mysterious cloak posted:If you get just enough Roni, it will form a perfect sheath around the turd and it will slide out without residue and go down without flushing With my last dying breaths I hold up a clean piece of toilet paper that I just wiped my rear end with and show it to my wife. “Perfect poops” I whisper as the life drains from my face.
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Mar 14, 2020 18:55
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HugeGrossBurrito posted:Well?  
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Mar 14, 2020 18:56
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This is price gouging, right? https://www.amazon.com/dp/B078H89R6R/ref=cm_sw_r_other_apa_i_IQrBEbF7C90KN
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Mar 14, 2020 18:57
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Lol
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Mar 14, 2020 18:58
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Nurge posted:Look I don't mind making jokes about whatever, but the fact is it's only a matter of time before goons are going to start losing parents/grandparents, and dying themselves. It's just a bit of a bad time for it imo. But you do you. I'm not going to pretend I haven't made tasteless jokes at inopportune times. I just remembered my grandmother (mom's mom) is still alive. She was never kind to my mother or me when I was little and eventually she and my mother just sort of fell out of contact. After that I saw no reason to try either. The last time we spoke was probably ten years ago. She must be in her late eighties by now. No reason for this anecdote just felt like sharing.
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Mar 14, 2020 18:59
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B_sketchy posted:This is price gouging, right? For a 1000 bucks that thing better suck your dick
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Mar 14, 2020 18:59
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i must compose posted:So can I still go to the gym if it's in my state? Gyms are kind of gross places even when we're not in the middle of a pandemic, so you should really stay home if you can. I had a hard time making the same decision since I do not have any gym equipment at home. Here's some bodyweight exercises you can do in the meantime!    Don't forget things like going for a run, wall sits, planks and stuff you can do without weights or equipment!
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Mar 14, 2020 19:02
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Aside from my client blaming covid19 on 5G towers, my cousin informs me it was created in a lab. Please god I know conspiracies sometimes happen but why do you need an explanation other than “humans are irrational and myopic”??
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Mar 14, 2020 19:02
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HugeGrossBurrito posted:For a 1000 bucks that thing better suck your dick these things went from widely available to gone in just a matter of hours. I bought one on Amazon for $60 and was looking through about 40 of them, all sold by amazon starting at about $20. Plenty of stock. This was yesterday morning. Then the one I bought was out of stock when I checked the order summary after work, and they were all gone. Then the one I bought reappeared for hundreds of dollars, and it was gone again. it's like everyone had the revelation at the same time. I'd be surprised if it actually shows up in the mail at this rate tbh.
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Mar 14, 2020 19:08
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B_sketchy posted:This is price gouging, right? https://camelcamelcamel.com/product/B078H89R6R You could've had it for as low as $840 but missed your chance. 
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Mar 14, 2020 19:11
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.... there are people out there buying used bidets?
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Mar 14, 2020 19:16
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They've figured out why there are so few infections in India.
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Mar 14, 2020 19:20
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Arsenic Lupin posted:.... there are people out there buying used bidets?
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Mar 14, 2020 19:22
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Sirotan posted:Gyms are kind of gross places even when we're not in the middle of a pandemic, so you should really stay home if you can. I had a hard time making the same decision since I do not have any gym equipment at home. Here's some bodyweight exercises you can do in the meantime! Or you can play Ring Fit Adventure! Hope you already have it though, because it's also being price gouged from 70$ to 200$.
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Mar 14, 2020 19:24
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zStn70Ot4r0 has this been posted yet?
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Mar 14, 2020 19:26
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Faith For Two posted:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zStn70Ot4r0 I'm a GEP gun
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Mar 14, 2020 19:28
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Arsenic Lupin posted:.... there are people out there buying used bidets? Do you think people replace the toilet seats of every apartment they ever get?
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Mar 14, 2020 19:28
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Soysaucebeast posted:Or you can play Ring Fit Adventure! Hope you already have it though, because it's also being price gouged from 70$ to 200$. Yikes, is that from third party sellers or is Nintendo getting in on the grift? Ring Fit Adventure is pretty dope though for anyone that can find it at regular price.
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Mar 14, 2020 19:28
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Mordja posted:They've figured out why there are so few infections in India. 
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Mar 14, 2020 19:29
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HugeGrossBurrito posted:For a 1000 bucks that thing better suck your dick https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mQ_ZTBmKpX8
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Mar 14, 2020 19:30
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LimburgLimbo posted:Do you think people replace the toilet seats of every apartment they ever get?
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Mar 14, 2020 19:32
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How often does the operations dashboard update?
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Mar 14, 2020 19:32
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I mean you don’t poop into the Biden
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Mar 14, 2020 19:33
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Lmao just gunna leave that autocorrect
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Mar 14, 2020 19:33
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Hobo Clown posted:Yikes, is that from third party sellers or is Nintendo getting in on the grift? It's all third party sellers so far as I can tell. I did check the Nintendo website though and they don't even have it listed there. I saw some a walmart last week though for the normal price.
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Mar 14, 2020 19:34
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i feel like poo poo i think i have the virus edit: never mind forgot that im just hung over 
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Mar 14, 2020 19:35
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I've been trying, for a few days now, to figure what this thread was really reminding me of. Then it hit me; the Bug City soucebook for Shadowrun, circa 1994. Anywho, I've got a date tomorrow with a woman who works in a hospital. I am Tyr Anasazi! Of Kodiak Pride out of Victoria by Barbarossa! And I! Will never! Surrendah!
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Mar 14, 2020 19:37
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Hey guys, there's an extremely bullshit article going around about 'flattening the curve' being some giant lie. It's written by a computer toucher that doesn't know things. Listen to this guy instead: https://twitter.com/CT_Bergstrom/status/1238718629094379521
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Mar 14, 2020 19:41
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Desperate Character posted:if you're in florida I would use the florida department of health website to see where all the confirmed cases have been; so far it seems we've only have had isolated cases in the tampa bay area but community spread is seemingly starting in counties like Broward and Miami-Dade http://www.floridahealth.gov/diseases-and-conditions/COVID-19/index.html
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Mar 14, 2020 19:45
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Trump Caught Google Off Guard With a Bogus Coronavirus Site Announcement | WIRED https://www.wired.com/story/coronavirus-donald-trump-google-website/
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Mar 14, 2020 19:48
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I told her I'd strongly consider quarantining at my parents' house, and then made a joke about my boyfriend leaving our cat in a carrier on the porch, so we could time share her.
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Mar 14, 2020 19:49
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Pick posted:How often does the operations dashboard update? appears to be every 20 to 30 minutes
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Mar 14, 2020 19:51
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TheCenturion posted:I am Tyr Anasazi! Of Kodiak Pride out of Victoria by Barbarossa! And I! Will never! Surrendah!  A newborn in England appears to have caught coronavirus from its infected mother. Not clear whether it was in the labor and delivery room or before birth.
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Mar 14, 2020 20:00
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BIG TIT LIL NIP posted:appears to be every 20 to 30 minutes Thanks.
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Mar 14, 2020 20:01
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I've been practicing this quarantine thing for years. Don't leave the house for weeks at a time? Easy peasy.
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Mar 14, 2020 20:02
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Nurge posted:This isn't as funny as you think it is considering we're going to have millions of old people actually dying from this regardless. That's what makes it funny in the first place
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Mar 14, 2020 20:02
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Resting Lich Face posted:I've been practicing this quarantine thing for years. Don't leave the house for weeks at a time? Easy peasy. All my friends have been social distancing for the better part of a decade That's why they never call me to hang out right???
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Mar 14, 2020 20:06
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Nurge posted:The poor are going to get disproportionately infected in fact, because they have less chance to prep and afford to quarantine themselves. pretty much everything bad in society disproportionately affects the poor which is why i lost it at the marxist goons who had a hard on in the economic collapse thread
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Mar 14, 2020 20:10
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So did anyone else’s workplace use the phrase “business as usual” while trying to explain why they’re still in operation? It’s eerily accurate. I fix vending machine coin mechs by the way, so it’s not like we’re some vital supply source or something.
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Mar 14, 2020 20:15
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