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Who is your first pick in the deputy leadership race?
This poll is closed.
R. Allin-Khan 6 1.60%
R. Burgon 80 21.33%
D. Butler 72 19.20%
A. Rayner 35 9.33%
I. Murray 5 1.33%
P. Flaps 177 47.20%
Total: 375 votes
[Edit Poll (moderators only)]

 
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duckmaster
Sep 13, 2004
Mr and Mrs Duck go and stay in a nice hotel.

One night they call room service for some condoms as things are heating up.

The guy arrives and says "do you want me to put it on your bill"

Mr Duck says "what kind of pervert do you think I am?!

QUACK QUACK

XMNN posted:

I live next to the cemetery, which is actually quite nice because it's effectively a bit of quiet parkland and if I have my window open I can hear owls, woodpeckers, badgers (and/or foxes?) that live in there

today I can hear two guys turning people away because the cemetery is closed to visitors for three weeks, but burials are still going ahead

according to my dad they've started digging a whole bunch of graves at the far end, will verify this on my government sanctioned exercise slot this afternoon

https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/coronavirus-mass-grave-sites-requested-21732760


9000 mass graves, if that doesn't tell you the governments real plan nothing will

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Jose
Jul 24, 2007

Adrian Chiles is a broadcaster and writer
Hmm I kind of need a few things from the shop. Not much but I don't have any peppers and I want to use them while making some black beans.

Might require a short trip to the Tesco express I live near

NotJustANumber99
Feb 15, 2012

somehow that last av was even worse than your posting
Do you have any friends nearby, preferably elderly, you could stop by and visit whilst your out?

Jose
Jul 24, 2007

Adrian Chiles is a broadcaster and writer
No but I had to dodge an old woman who was determined to keep walking backwards and sideways oblivious to me being there before I could go inside

It had no fresh fruit or veg but the green grocers next to it had a lot of display outside lol

kecske
Feb 28, 2011

it's round, like always

keep punching joe posted:

The Peoples Fields are deepest red.

They're full of all our virus dead.

IrvingWashington
Dec 9, 2007

Shabbat Shalom
Clapping Larry

kecske posted:

They're full of all our virus dead.

They went to work to avoid the sack
But this time they're not coming back

elbkaida
Jan 13, 2008
Look!

Oodles posted:

loving hell.

Even if new cases in Italy are stable now the deaths will probably only come down a week or two after the new cases start going down.

Azza Bamboo
Apr 7, 2018


THUNDERDOME LOSER 2021
Wasn't it very recently that the Italian military was called in to specifically to check old peoples homes to see if they're alive? If so, that could explain a jump in recorded deaths.

Darth Walrus
Feb 13, 2012
https://twitter.com/markdistef/status/1242503532332437505?s=21

OwlFancier
Aug 22, 2013

The invisible handjob of the free market at work.

Azza Bamboo
Apr 7, 2018


THUNDERDOME LOSER 2021
Gonna start panic buying tissues and lube.

Darth Walrus
Feb 13, 2012

OwlFancier posted:

The invisible handjob of the free market at work.

Pornhub is all about making its handjobs extremely visible.

FairyNuff
Jan 22, 2012

IrvingWashington posted:

They went to work to avoid the sack
But this time they're not coming back

Those feeding the economy cannot shirk,
even in death they'll be "fit to work".

History Comes Inside!
Nov 20, 2004




Upper management at one of our sites just emailed to the effect of "We've handed over our work laptops to be given to frontline staff to work from home. This means we can't do any work so now team leads are in charge and we'll see you in 3-12 weeks. Good luck!"

This is two (2) laptops being put back into a population that requires something closer to seven hundred (700) more to actually get enough people working at home to make the job we do viable vs just shutting up shop, which we can't do because we're on the essential list (although somehow other companies in our industry have closed doors already so???). What a pair of heroes.

I'm already working from home and sick as a dog but I feel for all my colleagues who still have to sit in that lovely building with no opening windows and bad air con.

NotJustANumber99
Feb 15, 2012

somehow that last av was even worse than your posting

Does it mention anything about refunds for people that already pay this?

namesake
Jun 19, 2006

"When I was a girl, around 12 or 13, I had a fantasy that I'd grow up to marry Captain Scarlet, but he'd be busy fighting the Mysterons so I'd cuckold him with the sexiest people I could think of - Nigel Mansell, Pat Sharp and Mr. Blobby."

NotJustANumber99 posted:

Does it mention anything about refunds for people that already pay this?

Some sort of master rebate you mean?

Subbz
Nov 4, 2008

Somebody in my house just confirmed this is true.


namesake posted:

Some sort of master rebate you mean?

:perfect:

Guavanaut
Nov 27, 2009

Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998



Toilet Rascal
On one hand, it encourages people to stay at home, on the other, that's like an Uber level slap on all the sex workers camming through the lockdown.

Jaeluni Asjil
Apr 18, 2018

Sorry I thought you were a landlord when I gave you your old avatar!

Azza Bamboo posted:

Wasn't it very recently that the Italian military was called in to specifically to check old peoples homes to see if they're alive? If so, that could explain a jump in recorded deaths.

Spain for sure. Maybe Italy as well.
Lots of dead old people found.

Peoples' Fields still green, no sign of red except the jacket of a woman in the distance walking a dog. It was nice. Going out after 5pm is definitely a good move as most people have gone home for the night by then.

I got cornered by my next-door neighbour, Phyllis, she's minute (up to my waist high) and 87, has no spleen, no use of her right hand, a hump on her back, and just got over a heavy cold. But she is a sweety. (She had Sky installed and spent ages trying to get the hang of the two remotes so I was in and out of there like a yoyo for a couple of weeks. She usually has her daughter come in three times a week and a home help once a week. Both have told her they won't be coming in for the duration.

I told her anything she needs - housework or shopping - just knock my door or shove a note through the letter box. (I will also make an effort to check on her every couple of days anyway now).

She is someone who actually DID live through The Blitz in Cardiff and the Rhondda valley (7 years old when WW2 started).
So we had a good old natter about rations and why didn't this government simply issue everyone with a ration book etc. (though it would probably be a Smart Card of some description these days).

Borrovan
Aug 15, 2013

IT IS ME.
🧑‍💼
I AM THERESA MAY


large_gourd posted:

are you actually concerned about this?
Are you not?

I work with a lot of criminologists, and all of the good ones are shouting this from the rooftops. Powers given to police in response to specific crises are almost never repealed when the crisis is over. Or used for the purpose for which they were conferred.

e: in fact, I've even heard unconfirmed reports that All Coppers may, in fact, be Bastards

Comrade Fakename
Feb 13, 2012


https://twitter.com/fishplums/status/1242196837009891337

Coohoolin
Aug 5, 2012

Oor Coohoolie.

Guavanaut posted:

On one hand, it encourages people to stay at home, on the other, that's like an Uber level slap on all the sex workers camming through the lockdown.

You don't get access to cams through premium, all the custom and personal content still needs paid.

XMNN
Apr 26, 2008
I am incredibly stupid
just doing my government approved exercise activity and there's a group of lads throwing a ball around on the rugby pitch

dunno if I'm supposed to call the police or something..??

they're white and it's a rugby ball so I think the probability of a brutality is moderately low, if that makes a difference

Tsietisin
Jul 2, 2004

Time passes quickly on the weekend.

XMNN posted:

just doing my government approved exercise activity and there's a group of lads throwing a ball around on the rugby pitch

dunno if I'm supposed to call the police or something..??

they're white and it's a rugby ball so I think the probability of a brutality is moderately low, if that makes a difference

Exercising no longer allowed according to the broadcast text I just received.

OwlFancier
Aug 22, 2013

Coohoolin posted:

You don't get access to cams through premium, all the custom and personal content still needs paid.

Mm, but you're flooding the market with cheap high grade smut, which makes it harder for the artisanal filthmongers to compete.

bump_fn
Apr 12, 2004

two of them

baka kaba posted:

shoutout to forkboy



Julio Cruz
May 19, 2006

XMNN posted:

just doing my government approved exercise activity and there's a group of lads throwing a ball around on the rugby pitch

dunno if I'm supposed to call the police or something..??

they're white and it's a rugby ball so I think the probability of a brutality is moderately low, if that makes a difference

lol if you don't think a group of Rugby Ruperts would get violent, like if one of them tears their North Face gilet

Coohoolin
Aug 5, 2012

Oor Coohoolie.

Borrovan posted:

Are you not?

I work with a lot of criminologists, and all of the good ones are shouting this from the rooftops. Powers given to police in response to specific crises are almost never repealed when the crisis is over. Or used for the purpose for which they were conferred.

e: in fact, I've even heard unconfirmed reports that All Coppers may, in fact, be Bastards

It's-a clear desa viruses made a pact wesa desa People's Republic Du China. Senators, "Dellow Felegates." In response to this direct threat to the Republic, mesa propose that the Senate give immediately emergency powers to the Supreme Chancellor.

Darth Walrus
Feb 13, 2012
https://twitter.com/rachelreevesmp/status/1242429204773441536?s=21

OwlFancier
Aug 22, 2013

Coohoolin posted:

It's-a clear desa viruses made a pact wesa desa People's Republic Du China. Senators, "Dellow Felegates." In response to this direct threat to the Republic, mesa propose that the Senate give immediately emergency powers to the Supreme Chancellor.

This is the worst thing you have ever posted.

Jaeluni Asjil
Apr 18, 2018

Sorry I thought you were a landlord when I gave you your old avatar!

Tsietisin posted:

Exercising no longer allowed according to the broadcast text I just received.

Oh really? People will die from obesity or go insane!

Of course, it's another way to finish off the poor who live in tiny spaces. The ones living in homes with big gardens will be ok.

Julio Cruz
May 19, 2006
I just made eggy bread out of a cheese and jalapeno loaf and it may well be the best decision I've made in my entire life

Disgusting Coward
Feb 17, 2014

quote:

A massive surge in crossbows sales has meant there are no rifle crossbows left in the country. We have taken delivery of a limited amount of pistol crossbows today though. I have had to limit the bolts (arrows) to one pack per customer as we are very low on those.

Um.

learnincurve
May 15, 2014

Smoosh

Julio Cruz posted:

I just made eggy bread out of a cheese and jalapeno loaf and it may well be the best decision I've made in my entire life

I made bread and butter pudding out of a panettone from Christmas I forgot about

Anyway,


https://twitter.com/JonesCitizen/status/1242519589088616450

Loonytoad Quack
Aug 24, 2004

High on Shatner's Bassoon
I've decided this is the only news about coronavirus I'm going to believe for now:

https://twitter.com/PickardJE/status/1242489840068894720
Especially because I had a horrible fever, cough and loss of taste/smell a couple of months back so it suits me fine to believe it.

Crisis over, everyone back to work.

Jose
Jul 24, 2007

Adrian Chiles is a broadcaster and writer

Coohoolin posted:

You don't get access to cams through premium, all the custom and personal content still needs paid.

just use chaturbate

Dead Goon
Dec 13, 2002

No Obvious Flaws



XMNN posted:

just doing my government approved exercise activity and there's a group of lads throwing a ball around on the rugby pitch

dunno if I'm supposed to call the police or something..??

they're white and it's a rugby ball so I think the probability of a brutality is moderately low, if that makes a difference

Maybe they all live in the same house?

sinky
Feb 22, 2011



Slippery Tilde
The Guardian has an article about how the rest of the world* thinks Boris is a dumb gently caress.

quote:

Others worried about the fate of friends and relatives in Britain. Giorgio Gori, the mayor of Bergamo, the city hardest hit by Italy’s coronavirus outbreak, flew his two daughters out of the UK, deeming them safer at home.

“When I saw what the English government was thinking about this problem, I decided to bring them back, because I think that even if we are at the centre of the epidemic, probably they are more secure here than in England, because I don’t understand why the government didn’t decide in time to protect their citizens,


*apart from a son of Jair Bolsonaro

XMNN
Apr 26, 2008
I am incredibly stupid

Dead Goon posted:

Maybe they all live in the same house?

it's certainly possible, but they all looked roughly the same age and it's not a particularly studenty/young professionaly area

duckmaster posted:

https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/coronavirus-mass-grave-sites-requested-21732760


9000 mass graves, if that doesn't tell you the governments real plan nothing will

I just walked past it and there's a handful of new (occupied) graves in a row, but it's not the plague pit or row of holes waiting to be filled that I was envisioning

OTOH they have almost completely sealed off the place, including putting barriers up where there's railings missing from fences and tape to stop you walking through the gaps where gates don't quite meet the wall, so I'm not sure wtf is going on.

It doesn't seem like a particularly huge vector, as people tend to be in family groups and it's never particularly busy, so I can't see it being to do with the spread of the disease. The sign mentioned allowing them to focus resources on tackling it, but the only thing it can really be saving is some grounds maintenance and that doesn't really seem to justify sealing it off to the public

XMNN fucked around with this message at 20:13 on Mar 24, 2020

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TACD
Oct 27, 2000

Cream for the Queen

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