Chinathread: Look at this pig'zhuge balls!

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > Chinathread: Look at this pig'zhuge balls!

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Alan Smithee: Jan 4, 2005; A man becomes preeminent, he's expected to have enthusiasms.

Enthusiasms, enthusiasms...

the forbidden city is once again forbidden

# ? Mar 26, 2020 17:59

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# ? May 29, 2024 15:30

The North Tower: Aug 20, 2007; You should throw it in the ocean.

Xi standing in front of the tanks but they�re planes .jpg

# ? Mar 26, 2020 18:03

LimburgLimbo: Feb 10, 2008

Once again Bad China follows the lead of Good China

# ? Mar 26, 2020 18:07

Blistex: Oct 30, 2003; Macho Business
Donkey Wrestler

New Covid 19 treatment being promoted in China?

a. Antibiotics
b. A root/leaf that looks like the virus
c. An animal product that is extracted via torture
d. An honest to goodness actual treatment that was created in a lab using modern medicine and practices which is currently undergoing an expedited clinical trial.

https://news.google.com/articles/CAIiEEuX4T5rZwOO9CjR34nt31UqGQgEKhAIACoHCAowmrWECzDc_IADMP7SgwY?hl=en-CA&gl=CA&ceid=CA%3Aen

# ? Mar 26, 2020 18:09

Sten Freak: Sep 10, 2008; Despite all of these shortcomings, the Sten still has a long track record of shooting people right in the face.; College Slice

Blistex posted:

New Covid 19 treatment being promoted in China?

a. Antibiotics
b. A root/leaf that looks like the virus
c. An animal product that is extracted via torture
d. An honest to goodness actual treatment that was created in a lab using modern medicine and practices which is currently undergoing an expedited clinical trial.

https://news.google.com/articles/CAIiEEuX4T5rZwOO9CjR34nt31UqGQgEKhAIACoHCAowmrWECzDc_IADMP7SgwY?hl=en-CA&gl=CA&ceid=CA%3Aen

well of course thats what it is

# ? Mar 26, 2020 18:19

Roumba: Jun 29, 2005; Buglord

I read that as a treatment cocktail and was quite confused for a bit.

# ? Mar 26, 2020 18:57

WarpedNaba: Feb 8, 2012; Being social makes me swell!

A Brandy Alexander'd make me feel better.

# ? Mar 26, 2020 19:11

oohhboy: Jun 8, 2013; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

Sten Freak posted:

well of course thats what it is

Bad China never changes.

# ? Mar 26, 2020 21:25

url: Apr 23, 2007; internet gnuru

KennyTheFish posted:

Mark Blyth has a lot of good presentations on YouTube that goes into this.

Thanks, taking a look now

# ? Mar 26, 2020 21:42

Kharnifex: Sep 11, 2001; The Banter is better in AusGBS

Blistex posted:

New Covid 19 treatment being promoted in China?

a. Antibiotics
b. A root/leaf that looks like the virus
c. An animal product that is extracted via torture
d. An honest to goodness actual treatment that was created in a lab using modern medicine and practices which is currently undergoing an expedited clinical trial.

https://news.google.com/articles/CAIiEEuX4T5rZwOO9CjR34nt31UqGQgEKhAIACoHCAowmrWECzDc_IADMP7SgwY?hl=en-CA&gl=CA&ceid=CA%3Aen

Goddamn motherfuckers

# ? Mar 26, 2020 23:16

Cheesemaster200: Feb 11, 2004; Guard of the Citadel

Blistex posted:

New Covid 19 treatment being promoted in China?

a. Antibiotics
b. A root/leaf that looks like the virus
c. An animal product that is extracted via torture
d. An honest to goodness actual treatment that was created in a lab using modern medicine and practices which is currently undergoing an expedited clinical trial.

https://news.google.com/articles/CAIiEEuX4T5rZwOO9CjR34nt31UqGQgEKhAIACoHCAowmrWECzDc_IADMP7SgwY?hl=en-CA&gl=CA&ceid=CA%3Aen

I also hear that eating raw bats is good for longevity and stamina.

# ? Mar 26, 2020 23:32

The North Tower: Aug 20, 2007; You should throw it in the ocean.

Kharnifex posted:

Goddamn motherfuckers

lovely startup idea: flood the black market with counterfeit bear bile. Have everyone donate their fingernail and toe clippings for the counterfeit keratin/rhino horn market. 3D printed tiger penises from stem cells.

# ? Mar 26, 2020 23:35

Shumagorath: Jun 6, 2001

The North Tower posted:

lovely startup idea: flood the black market with counterfeit bear bile. Have everyone donate their fingernail and toe clippings for the counterfeit keratin/rhino horn market. 3D printed tiger penises from stem cells.

...and then liberally sprinkle radioisotopes because our clients deserve it.

# ? Mar 27, 2020 00:06

I would blow Dane Cook: Dec 26, 2008

https://twitter.com/MacaesBruno/status/1243134029928554496

# ? Mar 27, 2020 00:23

LordArgh: Mar 17, 2009; Nap Ghost

I would blow Dane Cook posted:

https://twitter.com/MacaesBruno/status/1243134029928554496

one weird trick to reduce your number of confirmed cases

# ? Mar 27, 2020 01:20

sticksy: May 26, 2004; Nap Ghost

The North Tower posted:

lovely startup idea: flood the black market with counterfeit bear bile. Have everyone donate their fingernail and toe clippings for the counterfeit keratin/rhino horn market. 3D printed tiger penises from stem cells.

That's what is amazing/maddening to me - they'll cut loving infant formula of all things with melamine but bear bile obtained through medieval torture and other terrible TCM has to be pure and preferably involving the most rare animals suffering the most unnecessarily.

# ? Mar 27, 2020 01:21

Ailumao: Nov 4, 2004

https://www.fmprc.gov.cn/mfa_eng/wjbxw/t1761867.shtml

China's put a halt on any foreigner entering the country, even those with official visas.

Seems a little late in the game, esp. after all that posturing about how other people shouldn't put travel bans into effect.

They were testing almost 100% of people coming in for about a month, so maybe that was just too much to deal with.

# ? Mar 27, 2020 01:34

Nucken Futz: Oct 30, 2010; by Reene

Magna Kaser posted:

https://www.fmprc.gov.cn/mfa_eng/wjbxw/t1761867.shtml

China's put a halt on any foreigner entering the country, even those with official visas.

Seems a little late in the game, esp. after all that posturing about how other people shouldn't put travel bans into effect.

They were testing almost 100% of people coming in for about a month, so maybe that was just too much to deal with.

This was done to further validate the CCP's narrative that the Winnie the Flu was imported in to their glorious, but grievously slandered country.

# ? Mar 27, 2020 02:01

Fojar38: Sep 2, 2011; Sorry I meant to say I hope that the police use maximum force and kill or maim a bunch of innocent people, thus paving a way for a proletarian uprising and socialist utopia

also here's a stupid take
---------------------------->

oh no the world is being locked out of china how tragic

# ? Mar 27, 2020 02:05

Duck and Cover: Apr 6, 2007

Blistex posted:

New Covid 19 treatment being promoted in China?

a. Antibiotics
b. A root/leaf that looks like the virus
c. An animal product that is extracted via torture
d. An honest to goodness actual treatment that was created in a lab using modern medicine and practices which is currently undergoing an expedited clinical trial.

https://news.google.com/articles/CAIiEEuX4T5rZwOO9CjR34nt31UqGQgEKhAIACoHCAowmrWECzDc_IADMP7SgwY?hl=en-CA&gl=CA&ceid=CA%3Aen

Oh sweet I've got some Ursodiol. I skimmed the article but I assume this means I can sell it and make tons of money right?

Duck and Cover fucked around with this message at 02:24 on Mar 27, 2020

# ? Mar 27, 2020 02:12

Blistex: Oct 30, 2003; Macho Business
Donkey Wrestler

Fojar38 posted:

oh no the world is being locked out of china how tragic

Considering my mother in law is with us right now...

# ? Mar 27, 2020 02:21

Shrimp or Shrimps: Feb 14, 2012

HK boomers rejoicing and celebrating today.

# ? Mar 27, 2020 02:26

peanut: Sep 9, 2007

Blistex posted:

Considering my mother in law is with us right now...

oof haha

# ? Mar 27, 2020 03:11

Blistex: Oct 30, 2003; Macho Business
Donkey Wrestler

To add to the article about the faulty testing kits...

https://www.dailysabah.com/world/europe/340000-coronavirus-tests-spain-bought-from-china-dont-work-report-says

quote:

"The rapid tests, manufactured by the Chinese company Bioeasy, based in Shenzhen, have a sensitivity of 30%, when it should be higher than 80%," the sources told El Pais.

In response to the criticism, authorities have promised to distribute hundreds of thousands of masks and COVID-19 fast tests this week. On Wednesday, Health Minister Salvador Illa announced a 432 million euro ($474 million) purchase of Chinese medical material, including 500 million masks, 5.5 million test kits and 950 ventilators.

# ? Mar 27, 2020 03:20

Barudak: May 7, 2007

A beautiful world with beautiful places to visit

Barudak fucked around with this message at 15:59 on Jun 28, 2021

# ? Mar 27, 2020 03:30

Fojar38: Sep 2, 2011; Sorry I meant to say I hope that the police use maximum force and kill or maim a bunch of innocent people, thus paving a way for a proletarian uprising and socialist utopia

also here's a stupid take
---------------------------->

Blistex posted:

To add to the article about the faulty testing kits...

https://www.dailysabah.com/world/europe/340000-coronavirus-tests-spain-bought-from-china-dont-work-report-says

lol actual loving scams

# ? Mar 27, 2020 04:14

oohhboy: Jun 8, 2013; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

that tweet defending the broken tests. They might as well flip coins at 30%.

# ? Mar 27, 2020 08:58

Aoi: Sep 12, 2017; Perpetually a Pain.

Duck and Cover posted:

Oh sweet I've got some Ursodiol. I skimmed the article but I assume this means I can sell it and make tons of money right?

Not unless it's the 'real thing' that comes straight from an actual black bear's suffering.

My own 1500mg a day of actual medicine is clearly completely useless for TCM's advanced medicinal purposes.

# ? Mar 28, 2020 05:12

Blistex: Oct 30, 2003; Macho Business
Donkey Wrestler

oohhboy posted:

that tweet defending the broken tests. They might as well flip coins at 30%.

It's ok guys, it was ~~a temporary worker~~ an unauthorised Chinese company.

https://www.euractiv.com/section/coronavirus/news/spain-returns-faulty-test-kits-to-china-as-covid-19-death-toll-passes-4000-mark/

quote:

As Spain�s death toll hit 4,089, the Chinese embassy in Madrid said on Thursday (26 March) that the Spanish government had bought a batch of faulty COVID-19 testing kits from an unauthorised Chinese company. EURACTIV�s partner EFE reports.

The number of confirmed COVID-19 cases rose to almost 56,188 on Thursday (26 March), up 655 compared to the day before. Spain�s efforts to roll out 640,000 rapid testing kits bought from companies in China and South Korea this week hit a setback when the first order of around 9,000 failed to meet specifications and had to be returned. The Chinese embassy said the Spanish government had purchased the items from an unlicensed company called Shenzhen Bioeasy Biotechnology.

In a message on Twitter, it said the order had not been part of the �432 million ($466m) contract with China that the Spanish government announced Wednesday (25 March), which would include the delivery of 5.5 million testing kits. �The Chinese ministry of commerce offered Spain a list of certified providers, which did not include Shenzhen Bioeasy Biotechnology. Shenzhen Bioeasy Biotechnology has not yet been licensed by the Chinese National Medical Products Administration to sell its products,� he said.

The head of Spain�s public health emergency department Fernando Simon confirmed in his daily briefing that the first batch of kits delivered to the country had been sent back to the provider, although he did not name the company in question. �Spain obtained several providers and supply routes. The first one sent a batch of 9,000 tests that were validated at the National Center of Epidemiology and some hospitals (in Madrid). However, �the specifications of the batch did not match up with the certification of quality that came with it, which meant they had to be returned and the company will change them,� he said.

The Spanish association of microbiologists (SEIMC) warned that the testing kits in this batch performed with an accuracy level of under 30%, �With this level of accuracy, it is impossible to put them into routine use,� SEIMC spokeswoman Mar�a del Mar Tom�s told EFE.

# ? Mar 28, 2020 05:35

Fojar38: Sep 2, 2011; Sorry I meant to say I hope that the police use maximum force and kill or maim a bunch of innocent people, thus paving a way for a proletarian uprising and socialist utopia

also here's a stupid take
---------------------------->

Unauthorized companies are well known to be plentiful in China, especially biotech companies

# ? Mar 28, 2020 05:37

Alan Smithee: Jan 4, 2005; A man becomes preeminent, he's expected to have enthusiasms.

Enthusiasms, enthusiasms...

wonder if lijian zhao was "not authorized" to speak

# ? Mar 28, 2020 05:48

vanity slug: Jul 20, 2010

the unauthorized company can only salivate

# ? Mar 28, 2020 14:43

Alan Smithee: Jan 4, 2005; A man becomes preeminent, he's expected to have enthusiasms.

Enthusiasms, enthusiasms...

https://twitter.com/wilfredchan/status/1243887606569590784?s=20

"taiwan uh...number 2"

# ? Mar 28, 2020 15:35

GoutPatrol: Oct 17, 2009; *Stupid Babby*

Alan Smithee posted:

https://twitter.com/wilfredchan/status/1243887606569590784?s=20

"taiwan uh...number 2"

Best laugh of this whole mess

# ? Mar 28, 2020 15:46

vanity slug: Jul 20, 2010

someone really needs to add the curb your enthusiasm theme to the vid when he hangs up

# ? Mar 28, 2020 15:56

Grand Fromage: Jan 30, 2006; L-l-look at you bar-bartender, a-a pa-pathetic creature of meat and bone, un-underestimating my l-l-liver's ability to metab-meTABolize t-toxins. How can you p-poison a perfect, immortal alcohOLIC?

Alan Smithee posted:

https://twitter.com/wilfredchan/status/1243887606569590784?s=20

"taiwan uh...number 2"

holy gently caress lol

Wasn't the WHO a legitimate organization at some point? How did they become such CCP bootlickers?

# ? Mar 28, 2020 15:57

Vesi: Jan 12, 2005; pikachu looking at?

Jiangxi not respecting Hubei sovereignty

https://twitter.com/TruthAbtChina/status/1243473247536058368

# ? Mar 28, 2020 16:04

BrainDance: May 8, 2007; Disco all night long!

Vesi posted:

Jiangxi not respecting Hubei sovereignty

https://twitter.com/TruthAbtChina/status/1243473247536058368

I was reading about this earlier in the day, surprisingly not everything about it is getting removed from Weibo (at least not earlier) but it's very confusing because there are two simultaneous narratives going on, and I suspect they're both bullshit.

https://m.weibo.cn/status/4487188026935692
Here's an announcement about it, that's at least somewhat official.

# ? Mar 28, 2020 16:11

Sten Freak: Sep 10, 2008; Despite all of these shortcomings, the Sten still has a long track record of shooting people right in the face.; College Slice

Grand Fromage posted:

holy gently caress lol

Wasn't the WHO a legitimate organization at some point? How did they become such CCP bootlickers?

It appears to be money and information. China gives WHO money and if the latter antagonizes the government, they won't be given information and statistics in order to do their jobs.

But I wouldn't be surprised if that guy in the video and maybe all the lead WHO staff get straight up "gifts" from Chinese authorities in order to shape the narrative.

Unrelated here's a good in depth piece from someone living in China with his family of what the daily living situation in Chengdu (outside of Wuhan) is like.

https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2020/03/30/life-on-lockdown-in-china

# ? Mar 28, 2020 16:23

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# ? May 29, 2024 15:30

Blistex: Oct 30, 2003; Macho Business
Donkey Wrestler

Grand Fromage posted:

holy gently caress lol

Wasn't the WHO a legitimate organization at some point? How did they become such CCP bootlickers?

The WHO is the new IOC. From this article...
https://www.washingtonexaminer.com/opinion/op-eds/world-health-organization-protects-china-instead-of-coronavirus-victims

quote:

Hard-earned U.S. taxpayer dollars are flowing to WHO, a paper tiger that unblinkingly praises China�s failed response to the coronavirus. And that�s just the tip of the iceberg for an organization that spends $200 million per year for travel and luxurious hotels � more than the combined budget for tuberculosis, AIDS, and malaria combined.

The WHO has to report it's member state donations, and publish them. As for Feb 29, 2020, here are the stats: https://www.who.int/about/finances-accountability/funding/AC_Status_Report_2020.pdf?ua=1

Here are the top three pledges in USD:

United States: 99,128,271
China (PRC): 29,323,023
Japan: 20,918,146

I'm guessing that the Chinese donations are reliant on the WHO following certain "standards" that China has set.

# ? Mar 28, 2020 16:29

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