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Iron Crowned
May 6, 2003

by Hand Knit

Doorknob Slobber posted:

my favorite vegetable is the parsnip

Parsnips are great, and I recently discovered celery root. Celery root is way better than celery.

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BeefThief
Aug 8, 2007

HYDROXY CHLORO QUINN AT THE END OF THE TRUNNEL!

A Gnarlacious Bro
Apr 25, 2007

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
Circumcising is evil
Pets racist
Chili with beans BAD
DC better than marvel
The sjw Star was was good
Ect.

Scarodactyl
Oct 22, 2015


shovelbum posted:

pet culture is driving our high r0 lol but you cant talk about it
Don't let's start.

Inceltown
Aug 6, 2019

stolen from the r/r thread

My (30 M) girlfriend (30 F) buried all of my beans in the woods and won't tell me where, causing a fight between us.

quote:

Hello,

With all that is going on, we have stocked up on supplies, including some canned goods. I ordered a few weeks ago 30 cans of beans. 10 are black beans, 10 are kidney beans, and 10 are pink beans. Also, I ordered 15 cans of chickpeas. I thought this is a reasonable amount of beans and chickpeas to have every now and then and would last for quite some time.

However last night I opened the cabinet because I wanted to make a vegetarian chili using two cans of beans, but all of the beans were gone. What the hell?

I asked my girlfriend and she told me she buried all of the beans in the woods.

At first I thought she was joking, but she explained, no, she had buried the beans in the woods. WTF?

I asked her to explain and she told me she was afraid that "if things get bad" we might have to worry about "looters or whatever" and that the beans would be in danger of being stolen. I said I thought this was completely ridiculous and unlikely. She became angry at me and said she "is protecting our beans."

According to her logic, the beans are safely buried in the woods behind our apartment complex, and if we ever need some beans she will go to the "stash" and dig up a can or two, but would prefer if we save them all for "if things get worse".

I said why only bury the beans, why not bury our more valuable items? She said the canned food was most valuable for long-term means, and that since we get fresh food in our online grocery deliveries, it would make sense to continue to stockpile beans. She intends to go bury more beans in the woods every week.

This was too insane for me and I got very upset. I demanded to know where the beans were buried, and she refused to tell me. She said if I knew she was afraid I'd dig them up, I said drat right I would. She said "I will never jeopardize the beans." I crossed the line and said she was out of her mind, she stormed away. We have not talked since last night.

I think it is completely ridiculous to bury the beans in the woods and I want to find them and dig them up, but apparently my girlfriend is taking this very seriously. How can I convince her to tell me where the beans are? And do you think I should convince her to get therapy or something or should I break up with her? So confused. Is this normal for a girlfriend to bury beans or otherwise hide them?

TL;DR - My girlfriend buried the beans in the woods and will not tell me where they are.

Sharkie
Feb 4, 2013

by Fluffdaddy

Scarodactyl posted:

Don't let's start.

"pet culture is driving our high r0 lol but you cant talk about it" is the biggest baddest take this thread has had yet

A Gnarlacious Bro
Apr 25, 2007

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
Big fight brewing with the SO over the security of the bean hoard

Spergin Morlock
Aug 8, 2009

A Gnarlacious Bro posted:

Circumcising is evil
Pets racist
Chili with beans BAD
DC better than marvel
The sjw Star was was good
Ect.

dont circumsize your pets

Scarodactyl
Oct 22, 2015


Sharkie posted:

"pet culture is driving our high r0 lol but you cant talk about it" is the biggest baddest take this thread has had yet
This is the worst part.

Doorknob Slobber
Sep 10, 2006

by Fluffdaddy
oh many im buring all my parsnips now just in case

fits my needs
Jan 1, 2011

Grimey Drawer
https://twitter.com/abc7newsbayarea/status/1247651188893417472?s=20

twoday
May 4, 2005



C-SPAM Times best-selling author
parnsips were one of the main foods of the Roman army, and were used pretty much the way we use potatoes, I highly recommend mashed parsnip or 50/50 parsnip/potatoes (with a bit of garlic)

Spoondick
Jun 9, 2000

Inceltown posted:

stolen from the r/r thread

My (30 M) girlfriend (30 F) buried all of my beans in the woods and won't tell me where, causing a fight between us.

make her climb up the bean stalk and :sever:

Iron Crowned
May 6, 2003

by Hand Knit

Scarodactyl posted:

This is the worst part.

It's not pet culture, it's dog culture, HTH

Crazypoops
Jul 17, 2017



Japan has begun bombing our bean stockpile

twoday
May 4, 2005



C-SPAM Times best-selling author
good news folks, we've heard that our doctors are forced to wear garbage bags as clothing and we're working on it

Iron Crowned
May 6, 2003

by Hand Knit

twoday posted:

parnsips were one of the main foods of the Roman army, and were used pretty much the way we use potatoes, I highly recommend mashed parsnip or 50/50 parsnip/potatoes (with a bit of garlic)

:yeah: it's really good, same with celery root.

fosborb
Dec 15, 2006



Chronic Good Poster
my parents' cat died last night. was playing with toys, then just sort of fell over, twitched a few times and that was it.

they are so loving lonely today :(

twoday
May 4, 2005



C-SPAM Times best-selling author

Iron Crowned posted:

:yeah: it's really good, same with celery root.

I know it as celariac and it goes great in pea soup or lentil dishes

Vox Nihili
May 28, 2008

A Gnarlacious Bro posted:

Circumcising is evil
Pets racist
Chili with beans BAD
DC better than marvel
The sjw Star was was good
Ect.

Which star is the SJW star? Is it part of a broader constellation of like-minded stars?

Vox Nihili has issued a correction as of 23:55 on Apr 7, 2020

euphronius
Feb 18, 2009

health care workers fine but what about wfh parents with young children ?

where is our concert ?

RealityWarCriminal
Aug 10, 2016

:o:

Toys For Ass Bum
Feb 1, 2015

https://twitter.com/One56117812/status/1247652943035158529



Why do I keep seeing people on twitter claiming that Coronavirus will peak soon/next week?

Chard
Aug 24, 2010




fosborb posted:

my parents' cat died last night. was playing with toys, then just sort of fell over, twitched a few times and that was it.

they are so loving lonely today :(

i'm sorry friend.

A Gnarlacious Bro
Apr 25, 2007

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
Tfw bandits break in and brutalize you and your SO but you know that your bean hoard is safe and secure underground

Toph Bei Fong
Feb 29, 2008



Uncle Wemus posted:

Do people even like rick and morty anymore

The fans are uniformly terrible, but I like it because it makes people's brains pop and write things like this: http://www.eruditorumpress.com/blog/pop-between-realities-home-in-time-for-tea-rick-and-morty/

Sharkie
Feb 4, 2013

by Fluffdaddy

fosborb posted:

my parents' cat died last night. was playing with toys, then just sort of fell over, twitched a few times and that was it.

they are so loving lonely today :(

oh no, i'm sorry! be sure to be extra nice to them

A Gnarlacious Bro
Apr 25, 2007

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

Vox Nihili posted:

Which start is the SJW star? Is it part of a broader constellation of like-minded stars?

That really depends on the individual take-haver

NickPancakes
Oct 27, 2004

Damnit, somebody get me a tissue.

Toys For rear end Bum posted:

https://twitter.com/One56117812/status/1247652943035158529



Why do I keep seeing people on twitter claiming that Coronavirus will peak soon/next week?


because thats where healthdata has it at. i dont know their full methodology or anything

http://covid19.healthdata.org/united-states-of-america

euphronius
Feb 18, 2009

Toys For rear end Bum posted:

https://twitter.com/One56117812/status/1247652943035158529



Why do I keep seeing people on twitter claiming that Coronavirus will peak soon/next week?

it’s everywhere holy poo poo lmao

twoday
May 4, 2005



C-SPAM Times best-selling author

Toys For rear end Bum posted:

https://twitter.com/One56117812/status/1247652943035158529



Why do I keep seeing people on twitter claiming that Coronavirus will peak soon/next week?

because the numbers always go down on monday because of underreporting from the previous sunday and people are idiots

new kind of cat
May 8, 2007

shovelbum posted:

I was wondering if they didn't just destroy them all, people get super irrational about pets at the best of times and it's probably best not to have them when one common type is a carrier and the other requires numerous outdoor trips

hachi machi

TMMadman
Sep 9, 2003

by Fluffdaddy

twoday posted:

parnsips were one of the main foods of the Roman army, and were used pretty much the way we use potatoes, I highly recommend mashed parsnip or 50/50 parsnip/potatoes (with a bit of garlic)

A bit of garlic?

If you make mashed potatoes you should basically use an entire head of garlic and boil it with the potatoes and then mash it all up together. So good.

D1E
Nov 25, 2001


Did that goon whose girlfriend wanted to kill his parents over a part-time job at a pot shop end up severing or did he just ask other goons for their opinions endlessly?

NickPancakes
Oct 27, 2004

Damnit, somebody get me a tissue.

they also project a full week of 9/11s starting on easter

mark immune
Dec 14, 2019

put the teacher in the cope cage imo

shovelbum posted:

pet culture is driving our high r0 lol but you cant talk about it

you can talk about, but literally everyone will realize you're a room temp IQ contrarian

RealityWarCriminal
Aug 10, 2016

:o:

euphronius posted:

it’s everywhere holy poo poo lmao

the nevada desert is still safe

Vox Nihili
May 28, 2008

Toys For rear end Bum posted:

https://twitter.com/One56117812/status/1247652943035158529



Why do I keep seeing people on twitter claiming that Coronavirus will peak soon/next week?

They hit their peak in WA and are maaaybe approaching it in NY so everyone has decided to run outdoors to celebrate.

RealityWarCriminal
Aug 10, 2016

:o:

NickPancakes posted:

they also project a full week of 9/11s starting on easter

not a good time to be the president of chile, or heck, anywhere in the line of succession

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facetoucher cat
Dec 20, 2013

by sebmojo
my local news has a caster named wendy corona

https://www.wsbtv.com/author/wendy-corona/

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