Register a SA Forums Account here!
JOINING THE SA FORUMS WILL REMOVE THIS BIG AD, THE ANNOYING UNDERLINED ADS, AND STUPID INTERSTITIAL ADS!!!

You can: log in, read the tech support FAQ, or request your lost password. This dumb message (and those ads) will appear on every screen until you register! Get rid of this crap by registering your own SA Forums Account and joining roughly 150,000 Goons, for the one-time price of $9.95! We charge money because it costs us money per month for bills, and since we don't believe in showing ads to our users, we try to make the money back through forum registrations.
(Thread IKs: Josherino)
 
  • Post
  • Reply
Zvahl
Oct 14, 2005

научный кот

Failson posted:

Having one of those days where I get really jealous of people without mental health issues.

Like, they probably go whole days without desiring non-existence! Just not even thinking of it! That would be amazing.

this is honestly what gets me off of even trying to be social most times

like, realizing that I have to put on several masks to not make people scared and uncomfortable because they don't literally spend every day thinking about how much better off the world and everyone they know would be without them is daunting

and even if I do the song and dance, for what? To lie? to inveigle myself, someone I don't even like, into the life of someone I do? what would I do that for?

It feels like such an alien thought process to deal with that it's basically a non-starter. If I have to do this routine, and if it will get me nothing, why not just lie outright and deflect away from it? It's easier, I'm far more used to simply dissuading people through the halo effect and looking like an angry rear end in a top hat. All that to make someone's day worse?

And I could keep typing in paragraphs like this justifying my very well thought-out rationale for closeting myself away from every single person who could possibly help me, because that's all this stupid brain fuckery is. Knowing what's wrong is singularly unhelpful if you can't act on it.

It's just too hard to tell yourself to shut up all the time even when you know you're wrong, I'm deeply jealous of those people too tbh

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

err
Apr 11, 2005

I carry my own weight no matter how heavy this shit gets...
I haven't seen my psychiatrist or therapist in awhile since the coronavirus. Does anyone know how they are doing it now? I have Kaiser.

WrenP-Complete
Jul 27, 2012

I just saw my psychiatrist via telemedicine today. His office sent my prescription to the pharmacy, which offers curbside pickup for people in vulnerable groups and anyone else who would like it. I'll pick it up tomorrow. Good luck.

WrenP-Complete has issued a correction as of 09:10 on Apr 8, 2020

ACES CURE PLANES
Oct 21, 2010



So Bernie dropped out. I currently cannot cope with the knowledge that, no matter how the race goes, the social services and entitlements I use to live right now are going to shrink away and I will not be living long enough to vote in the next election.

I'd be lying if I said I currently didn't desperately want to die right now. At least with the vain glimmer of hope against overwhelming odds I could at least power through to the next day but I can't with this.

Padams
Jun 30, 2000

I Have the Power

to turn your property's lights off
My wife has a steady fever, and severe fatigue. I have a little bit of a cough and not sure if the tightness in my chest is actually shortness of breath or just anxiety. Took her to a drive up testing site yesterday, will be 3 to 10 days for a result. And now Bernie dropped out. What a loving day.

I felt like I was finally getting my poo poo together just for the world to fall apart around me. Ive never been so thankful to work customer service for a utility before since so many people around me are losing their jobs. Really hope its not the Rona, but at least Ill have insurance and wont be destitute if my wife and/or I ends up hospitalized!

Chokes McGee
Aug 7, 2008

This is Urotsuki.

xcheopis posted:

Usually to get laid.

Not helping.

Dick Trauma
Nov 30, 2007

God damn it, you've got to be kind.

ACES CURE PLANES posted:

So Bernie dropped out.

Take time to grieve, but don't give up. It took a long time for things to get so bad, and it will take time to fix it. I think millions of people have been energized and mobilized for progress and they are not going to let this stop them. It might not look like it but the horrible shitheads that try to keep things terrible are weaker now than they've been in decades. A stiff breeze could knock them down, and they know it.

ACES CURE PLANES
Oct 21, 2010



Dick Trauma posted:

Take time to grieve, but don't give up. It took a long time for things to get so bad, and it will take time to fix it. I think millions of people have been energized and mobilized for progress and they are not going to let this stop them. It might not look like it but the horrible shitheads that try to keep things terrible are weaker now than they've been in decades. A stiff breeze could knock them down, and they know it.

I mean, things taking forever to fix is exactly the problem now. What am I supposed to do when every option presented at the moment ends with getting the services I need to live cut? How much longer do I have to beg and throw myself at the mercy of the goodwill of others before I can just get something as simple as the medication I need to live for another day? The looming threat of any of these rapists winning means that my head's on the chopping block.

I don't want to die. I'm scared. But watching the pendulum swing toward my throat and getting closer and closer is so much scarier.

Alvarez IV
Aug 3, 2010
Probation
Can't post for 8 years!
I thought I'd come to terms with this bullshit on Super Tuesday, but hope is like a virus that goes dormant and then comes back to die again. I can't even get any pleasure at the thought of the Dems losing the popular vote and wiping the neoliberal turd-crumbs out of the hairy hole of America, because God knows they're just going to double down and run Chelsea Clinton 2024. We deserve COVID-19 and my only regret is that the wrong people are dying from it. Cough on America. Five hundred loving dollars I put down for the old Jew and I would have been better off spending it on weed, or a gun, or just tossing it in a sewer for IT to collect.

Alvarez IV has issued a correction as of 18:54 on Apr 8, 2020

AceOfFlames
Oct 9, 2012

Just got off the phone with my brother. I think the only think worse than not having to talk about is talking to someone who keeps spouting platitudes like "the coming crisis will not affect you, you know how to code" (despite me screaming about how I utterly suck at it, how my degree isn't in that field and insisting that companies will more and more only want rockstars, which he says is 'ludicrous, there's is just way too much work to be done'), "the powers that be will not let things fall apart" (HAH) etc. Just ONCE I'd like to have some proper advice from someone who knows how hosed we are that isn't "get a gun" or "get involved in your community" (I have never in my LIFE encountered a "community". Not even my neighbors talk to me).

AceOfFlames has issued a correction as of 18:14 on Apr 8, 2020

limp dick calvin
Sep 1, 2006

Strepitoso. Vedete? Una meraviglia.
going to take a bit of a leap (for me) and apply for a new job that I'm not 1000% qualified for. I still have my current job but why not give it a shot. (it's a first line help desk position)

ChrisBTY
Mar 29, 2012

this glorious monument

Dick Trauma posted:

Take time to grieve, but don't give up. It took a long time for things to get so bad, and it will take time to fix it. I think millions of people have been energized and mobilized for progress and they are not going to let this stop them. It might not look like it but the horrible shitheads that try to keep things terrible are weaker now than they've been in decades. A stiff breeze could knock them down, and they know it.

I need to know how you have come to this conclusion. Please explain why they are so fragile that they can keep the worst president in American history by several orders of magnitude safe from legal prosecution, safe from removal from office, completely immune to scandal and possibly in the white house for 4 more years. All I see is the gilded cage closing shut.

Dick Trauma
Nov 30, 2007

God damn it, you've got to be kind.
Being alive for a long time and watching the oppressors try to make up in loudness what they lack in actual power. They are detaching the Executive office from the rest of the country, and in doing so rendering it irrelevant. They have caused so much distress that new leaders are cropping up literally from coast to coast, at all levels of society.

I understand that there are many people who are determined to see the end of the world, and I understand that. I have been through the end of the world several times over the last 50 years and realize that there really is no such thing. If someone is ready to be hopeful and keep pushing for progress I applaud them. If they aren't I hope they come back from their mental wandering ready for a change.

Chokes McGee
Aug 7, 2008

This is Urotsuki.
e: clearly this did not help anyone so I'm removing it.

Chokes McGee has issued a correction as of 21:49 on Apr 8, 2020

AceOfFlames
Oct 9, 2012

What if you don't have any dreams? I feel like I am in an utter pit of despair and worst, that it is the only LOGICAL position. I see my coworker "make conversation" by asking random questions about objects in the background of people in the conference calls. WHY? People discussing utter bullshit about having gone for a 4k run by themselves. WHO CARES? Spouting bullshit about how this might all be good in the long run. It's NOT, do you HONESTLY believe that or is it your drat MONKEY BRAIN trying to keep you SANE?

I feel like I want the impossible: for someone to convince me that everything is going to be OK in a 100% foolproof 100% logical way. But that's not how it works. People need all sorts of delusions to survive: the delusion that they are more competent than others, the delusion that their loved ones do so unconditionally and will always stick by you even though you are no longer entertaining, the delusion that tomorrow will be better. I lost them all. And I don't know if I can get them back, or even if I want to. I want to know the truth. Even if it destroys me.

(USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)

UnfortunateSexFart
May 18, 2008

𒃻 𒌓𒁉𒋫 𒆷𒁀𒅅𒆷
𒆠𒂖 𒌉 𒌫 𒁮𒈠𒈾𒅗 𒂉 𒉡𒌒𒂉𒊑


Love 2 be shat on by my progressive relatives too. My uncle just said this

"Probably best to use your talents to build a future, not see youself as the victim. Learn something online that can get you skills for living in the present and into the future, moaning about the past might feel good in the moment. If you ever needed $ help, in an instant you would get it. I believe you have a limited ability to understand what real poverty is due to being Canadian and white."

I'm loving 40 next month and can barely get by in a studio apartment with no kids and dual incomes. I had to leave Canada and try to build a life on a temporary visa just to change that from "can't get by" to "barely get by." Millionaire parents never gave me a dime, never got to go to college. I'm officially disabled in more than one way but couldn't live on disability payments so I've been lowering my life expectancy by working full time. And this entitled rear end in a top hat who is only not destitute himself because he married rich has the audacity to tell me I'm moaning about the past. I was actually happy for the first time ever before this virus poo poo destroyed everything. Again.

What the gently caress is it with boomers and thinking online courses solve everything? Bitch I can barely work and sleep. Not to mention one of my disabilities is intense hand pain from activities like typing. I'll have to ice my hands after typing this.

PS Solidarity to all the Bernie bros. At least you had a candidate who gave you hope, Canada has never had that in my lifetime.

bobtheconqueror
May 10, 2005

UnfortunateSexFart posted:

PS Solidarity to all the Bernie bros. At least you had a candidate who gave you hope, Canada has never had that in my lifetime.

Yo your uncle sounds like a huge piece of poo poo. Thanks for the solidarity and I hope things go better for you. I think I've seen in other threads that you're kind of stuck in Australia in a bad spot? I've only dealt with the uncertainty of homelessness a few times, but I can say "quit moaning and take an online course" is maybe not the right answer. I know there's a lot of shame in asking for help, but if your parents are able to I would say go with that. To my mind, the reason we don't ask for help when we don't need it, is so that when we do, people understand that it's a real thing. I could also understand completely if that isn't an option for you, given how often family issues are directly related to mental illness. Hold to those you care for, and don't be afraid to ask for help where you can. We're all gonna go through the poo poo on this one, so we gotta look out for each other. Good luck, Internet person!

SpiderHyphenMan
Apr 1, 2010

by Fluffdaddy

AceOfFlames posted:

What if you don't have any dreams? I feel like I am in an utter pit of despair and worst, that it is the only LOGICAL position. I see my coworker "make conversation" by asking random questions about objects in the background of people in the conference calls. WHY? People discussing utter bullshit about having gone for a 4k run by themselves. WHO CARES? Spouting bullshit about how this might all be good in the long run. It's NOT, do you HONESTLY believe that or is it your drat MONKEY BRAIN trying to keep you SANE?

I feel like I want the impossible: for someone to convince me that everything is going to be OK in a 100% foolproof 100% logical way. But that's not how it works. People need all sorts of delusions to survive: the delusion that they are more competent than others, the delusion that their loved ones do so unconditionally and will always stick by you even though you are no longer entertaining, the delusion that tomorrow will be better. I lost them all. And I don't know if I can get them back, or even if I want to. I want to know the truth. Even if it destroys me.
Here is the truth: as long as your concern and care for the world/your country come at the expense of your concern and care for yourself, tomorrow will never be better. There is no grand catharsis coming, no reversal of fortune, no grand triumph where the world/your country becomes a place where decent people belong. But even though you don't belong in this world and never will, you are NOT alone. Treasure your interests, your hobbies, the things in this world that you enjoy. Bond with others over them, and build relationships based around mutual pleasure instead of mutual pain. If a friendship is based purely on a shared idea of what a better world looks like, it will never last. And if there's nothing that makes you feel connected to others besides your ideological desires, then please, please devote literally all of your spare time to changing that, and seek professional help if you are able.

yaleforks
Dec 2, 2007

Is Telehealth Psychiatry a thing? In need of a sedative for my weekly trips into the Hospital to work where I'm terrified of getting Covid. I literally had a panic attack so bad today I collapsed in the parking lot.

yaleforks has issued a correction as of 23:43 on Apr 8, 2020

UnfortunateSexFart
May 18, 2008

𒃻 𒌓𒁉𒋫 𒆷𒁀𒅅𒆷
𒆠𒂖 𒌉 𒌫 𒁮𒈠𒈾𒅗 𒂉 𒉡𒌒𒂉𒊑


bobtheconqueror posted:

Yo your uncle sounds like a huge piece of poo poo. Thanks for the solidarity and I hope things go better for you. I think I've seen in other threads that you're kind of stuck in Australia in a bad spot?

Thanks. I'm okay in the short term but the Aussie government left out millions of vulnerable people from its wage subsidy plan, including me, so I'm hosed if I get laid off. I'll never be able to compete for another job due to my visa status either - was hard enough in a good economy. I make the same as a McDonald's cashier currently but it's luxury for me compared to what I was used to in Canada.

I had put my life savings into an under construction condo right before this happened and will probably lose my deposit and the place now. That erases the one fortunate event I've benefitted from in my life (selling my lovely Vancouver condo, that I bought for $230k, for 200% profit). I'll never be able to afford more than subsistence going forward. And my eventual inheritance is tied up in real estate too so any hope of retiring is also now disappearing.

Plus there's a decent chance the fascists in power will use this as an excuse to further clamp down on immigration, forcing me out of the country. My five year visa can be renewed in 2023 under current laws.

Even if I could get back to Canada, which I have zero desire to do, I don't qualify for assistance there either as an Aussie resident for tax purposes.

Eat This Glob
Jan 14, 2008

God is dead. God remains dead. And we have killed him. Who will wipe this blood off us? What festivals of atonement, what sacred games shall we need to invent?

yaleforks posted:

Is Telehealth Psychiatry a thing? In need of a sedative for my weekly trips into the Hospital to work where I'm terrified of getting Covid. I literally had a panic attack so bad today I collapsed in the parking lot.

holy poo poo, im so sorry. i haven't looked into it specifically for psychiatry/prescribing medications, but telemedicine is absolutely a thing. id start with your pcp if you have one and go from there.

yaleforks
Dec 2, 2007

Eat This Glob posted:

holy poo poo, im so sorry. i haven't looked into it specifically for psychiatry/prescribing medications, but telemedicine is absolutely a thing. id start with your pcp if you have one and go from there.

drat I wish I had a primary care Dr. Lol

Zvahl
Oct 14, 2005

научный кот

yaleforks posted:

drat I wish I had a primary care Dr. Lol

yeah after a point there's just the suicide line and a bunch of good thoughts, everything kinda hinges on getting a doctor and being able to utilize their services and consume the drugs they prescribe as a prerequisite to even thinking about fixing things

I can do lots of things to calm down the worst of the worst, mostly with too much weed and decades of coping, but when your brain's busted and the chemicals aren't there there's not much you can do, there's just no way to want anything or to derive any positive emotions without having money for a doctor, and especially now it's pretty drat hard to not give up

AceOfFlames
Oct 9, 2012

SpiderHyphenMan posted:

Here is the truth: as long as your concern and care for the world/your country come at the expense of your concern and care for yourself, tomorrow will never be better. There is no grand catharsis coming, no reversal of fortune, no grand triumph where the world/your country becomes a place where decent people belong. But even though you don't belong in this world and never will, you are NOT alone. Treasure your interests, your hobbies, the things in this world that you enjoy. Bond with others over them, and build relationships based around mutual pleasure instead of mutual pain. If a friendship is based purely on a shared idea of what a better world looks like, it will never last. And if there's nothing that makes you feel connected to others besides your ideological desires, then please, please devote literally all of your spare time to changing that, and seek professional help if you are able.

Is this then what all relationships are based on? Finding people who share your values is bunk, best just to get an endless array of drinking and sports buddies? What if you have to stop drinking due to medication? What if you lose an arm or can't afford your hobby any more? This just further proves that people are ultimately just fickle creatures who only care about the shirt term good times you can give them and run away at any sort of problem. I want true friends. I want people I can confide in. I want people I can have deep conversations with. I want people to give me advice. I want to do those things for them in return. I don't want more people to hear babble on endlessly, I don't feel the need to babble at them.

bobtheconqueror
May 10, 2005

AceOfFlames posted:

Is this then what all relationships are based on? Finding people who share your values is bunk, best just to get an endless array of drinking and sports buddies? What if you have to stop drinking due to medication? What if you lose an arm or can't afford your hobby any more? This just further proves that people are ultimately just fickle creatures who only care about the shirt term good times you can give them and run away at any sort of problem. I want true friends. I want people I can confide in. I want people I can have deep conversations with. I want people to give me advice. I want to do those things for them in return. I don't want more people to hear babble on endlessly, I don't feel the need to babble at them.

I mean, all relationships are circumstantial in one way or another. Friends are ultimately those you can relate to or enjoy spending time with and are in close enough proximity for regular communication. True friends, imo, are those who've invested enough time and energy to develop bonds of trust. I think SHM's take is kind of hedonistic, but I agree that friendships start with shared interests or circumstances. The things you want, confidence, depth, and advice, come with trust, which you're not usually gonna get when you first meet someone. This is exceedingly loving difficult in modern times for a couple reasons. First, America in particular is mercenary as gently caress, so people don't trust for fear of being taken advantage of. Second, the Internet provides something of an anonymous outlet for thoughts and feelings, deep poo poo, that you would normally only share with those you trust, making the act of building trust less important to maintain sanity.

Basically, trust takes time. You'll have to deal with superficial friendships until you can build it. It'll also likely require you to trust first, which presents some obvious emotional vulnerabilities.

As to your original post, there is no Truth that we as human beings can knowingly perceive, and everything will be OK because we are a dot on a mote in some backwater part of the universe. It'll keep going with or without us. I'm sorry if these aren't entirely helpful answers, but I thought it was worth a shot.

SpiderHyphenMan
Apr 1, 2010

by Fluffdaddy
I suppose I should clarify that yes, civic engagement on a local level is important and meaningful, and can be both fulfilling and a good way to meet people. But,

AceOfFlames posted:

I want true friends. I want people I can confide in. I want people I can have deep conversations with. I want people to give me advice. I want to do those things for them in return.
these relationships cannot be built purely on shared grievances about injustice. There must be something that you mutually appreciate and enjoy.

Alvarez IV
Aug 3, 2010
Probation
Can't post for 8 years!
It's never going to end. The rest of my life is going to be in spent in my childhood bedroom, watching the wealthy and powerful become gods while every avenue of relief from pain is denied to me over and over again. It's only my good goddamned kindness that keeps me from going out and getting purposefully infected so my loved ones can all die faster so I can finally do myself in without any guilt. Someone should throw me a loving parade for every day I don't do that. I can't even blame depression, because as usual, I'm depressed over poo poo that you are right to be depressed about. The pills do nothing, except I'm sure I'll find out that's a lie if they run out, which a part of me hopes they do because maybe that'll motivate me to die faster. If ten minutes from now, a cure was found, poo poo would still be irreparable. All I do day after day is think this poo poo, plumbing new depths, waiting for the last of anyone that gives a gently caress whether I live or die to decide that investment in me isn't worth it. The ones I want to stop caring won't, and vice versa. Why can't the society in which I live accept that a person shouldn't be forced to go on when poo poo's this bad? It's not even like I'm a cog in a machine someplace that makes some rich gently caress money, slaves in the nineteenth century had more of a reason to live than I do now. No one outside these few square feet gains anything from my life, certainly not me. And this is after a loving month. What happens when I continue failing to cope, as I've failed to cope with every other bad thing that I've not killed myself through? The hole can always go deeper, and it will. I'm not going to kill myself, don't worry. I'm just going to want to.

SpiderHyphenMan
Apr 1, 2010

by Fluffdaddy

Alvarez IV posted:

It's only my good goddamned kindness that keeps me from going out and getting purposefully infected so my loved ones can all die faster so I can finally do myself in without any guilt. Someone should throw me a loving parade for every day I don't do that.

Do you really believe this?

Alvarez IV
Aug 3, 2010
Probation
Can't post for 8 years!

SpiderHyphenMan posted:

Do you really believe this?

No, I think I'm just looking for the quickest way out of the situation, and resent the fact that killing myself would just pass my problems along to other people. I don't make good decisions in general, but I think I'm a far cry from biological warfare against loved ones. It's just a frustrating prospect, having to wait this poo poo out, with no end in sight and potentially no end period. A friend said that right now is a mourning period for the past, and while the thought of having to be nostalgic for the last decade would normally fill me with full-on existential despair, I don't see the lie. Right now, and historically, the only ways I've felt agency in my life is by either turning my brain off, or leaning into and wallowing in the misery. I just kind of figured I'd be able to sustain the first one my whole life, and failing that, the second is what I've got left. Why exert myself when it makes no difference? Even if it's a self-fulfilling prophecy that I hosed myself into, it's reality by now. But no, I'm not going to give my family the COVID, nor do I think I deserve credit for not killing anyone.

olives black
Nov 24, 2017


LENIN.
STILL.
WON'T.
FUCK.
ME.
Just thought I'd offer the knowledge that generic 10 mg Lexapro took me from being on the knife edge of a panic attack every day and wanting to jump off the roof to just wanting to sleep on my couch every other weekend. Way easier to bounce back from poo poo now. If your doctor gives you the OK then don't be afraid to try it :)

AceOfFlames
Oct 9, 2012

My psych put me on bupropion (generic Wellbutrin) after I told her Fluoxetin (generic Prozac) did nothing for me. Does it work?

Unsinkabear
Jun 8, 2013

Ensign, raise the beariscope.





AceOfFlames posted:

My psych put me on bupropion (generic Wellbutrin) after I told her Fluoxetin (generic Prozac) did nothing for me. Does it work?

If your doctor prescribed it to you, try it and find out. All of these medicines have varying effects affects from one person to the next, so we can't tell you whether X thing will work for you or not. Literally the only way forward is by being willing to partner with your doc instead of second-guessing them, and approach this with the expectation that it will be trial and error until you find your personal solution.

Unsinkabear has issued a correction as of 22:22 on Apr 9, 2020

Chunderbucket
Aug 31, 2006

I had a beer with Stephen Miller once and now I like him.

AceOfFlames posted:

My psych put me on bupropion (generic Wellbutrin) after I told her Fluoxetin (generic Prozac) did nothing for me. Does it work?

I believe the line we're using now is "What have you got to lose?"

Eat This Glob
Jan 14, 2008

God is dead. God remains dead. And we have killed him. Who will wipe this blood off us? What festivals of atonement, what sacred games shall we need to invent?

AceOfFlames posted:

My psych put me on bupropion (generic Wellbutrin) after I told her Fluoxetin (generic Prozac) did nothing for me. Does it work?

no negative effects for me except it made me not sleep well, so now i take it in the morning. it makes me feel better if that's what you're asking, yeah

i was on prozac prior and that poo poo hosed my whole brain up

bobtheconqueror
May 10, 2005

AceOfFlames posted:

My psych put me on bupropion (generic Wellbutrin) after I told her Fluoxetin (generic Prozac) did nothing for me. Does it work?

My pdoc added bupropion onto fluox when I had a similar complaint. Taking both has worked pretty well for me, but he said that in his experience Wellbutrin can be hit or miss. As with all things medical, trust your doc until they demonstrate being a dumbass, then get a new one.

Somaen
Nov 19, 2007

by vyelkin

olives black posted:

Just thought I'd offer the knowledge that generic 10 mg Lexapro took me from being on the knife edge of a panic attack every day and wanting to jump off the roof to just wanting to sleep on my couch every other weekend. Way easier to bounce back from poo poo now. If your doctor gives you the OK then don't be afraid to try it :)

Seconding, I have been on 10 mg of lexapro for about 8 years now. At various points due to my own prejudices or stigma from family I have quit taking it at pretty good points in life thinking that I need to focus on positive thinking, healthy eating and sports. This has without fail lead to disaster and ruining my career and relationships by becoming depressed and several related symptoms of mental illness including memory loss, suicidal ideation and overeating. Now I have made piece that like a diabetic I need it to function or else I get a bad case of broken brain, but I am functional, happy, able to keep a job down and able to make the love of my life happy and be a reliable friend. This also included years of therapy but medication was absolutely crucial to start having any positive developments. If nothing else helps please look into it.

Alvarez IV
Aug 3, 2010
Probation
Can't post for 8 years!
10 mg of sertraline, five days left of it, and a fat lot of good it does, although I know if I gently caress around with it now I'm probably just going to not get out of bed period. I would kill everyone in this house including myself for a vaccine for this poo poo, and the thought that this could be the new normal instead of just an exceptionally bad year makes me want to. Humanity can get used to anything. Humans can't, not always. I was already a pretty inessential carbon collection before all this, a body in a room that had figured out how to leverage it for a couple of crumbs, and now I have nothing and no motivation to change that. Is this just what it's like for the majority of people throughout history, just invisible fuckers who didn't leave a mark? How many me's had to just cling on without hope, without joy, and would they feel as hollow as I feel if you told them "Don't worry, it's not the actual End of the World, we'll still have people around for generations"? My parents are doing all the pollyanna poo poo that you can only do when you've had a charmed life. I'm not sure which one will snap first. Mom's in some car parade right now, and all Dad does is watch Blue Bloods and complain that Biden can't campaign. I had a video call with a friend yesterday and it was a lifesaver, but it's unsustainable without some kind of ending date, and no one has one, or even the concept that one could be. I was supposed to get my poo poo together in 2020 and now I might as well just go full neckbeard and die in my childhood bedroom at the age my parents are at now, with my dirty dick in my hand, and my student loan untouched. Not every human serves a purpose and I don't know how much longer my only purpose can be to make sure those two don't cry and blame themselves for my failure, which they will, they always will. I wish my inherent reaction to the idea of working with computers for a living, a job that, could I do it, would fix a good handful of my problems and let me focus on the remainder, wasn't equal to the average person's idea of being a prostitute. This is how I feel right now, and it'll come and go as the day goes on and I distract myself with one more thing after another, but it's always there.

Happy Hedonist
Jan 18, 2009


I lost my mom earlier this year so I was already grumpy and bummed before this drat virus hit. Now, unless Im stoned, Im pretty miserable to be around. Me and my wife are both primary care providers and we are working super stressful opposite shifts, meaning we never get to see each other, while our child gets a fraction of the attention he used to get.

One thing Ive found especially infuriating recently is the fact everyone has devolved into speaking to each other in memes. Its been an annoyance of mine for years, but in the midst of this garbage it makes me want to punch kittens. Its probably time for a break from the internet.

got any sevens
Feb 9, 2013

by Cyrano4747

AceOfFlames posted:

My psych put me on bupropion (generic Wellbutrin) after I told her Fluoxetin (generic Prozac) did nothing for me. Does it work?

it made me more twitchy and i blunk a lot and ground my teeth a little more than usual, and i was on a low dose. didnt notice any good effects, but i was on sertraline at the time too

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

err
Apr 11, 2005

I carry my own weight no matter how heavy this shit gets...
I tried chatting on the Crisis line awhile back but there was a 40+ person queue to speak with someone.

I didn't end up talking to anyone.

  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
  • Post
  • Reply