(Thread IKs:
Josherino)
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got any sevens posted:adhd is real. all we can do is cope and hope
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Apr 27, 2020 10:40
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| # ? May 26, 2024 00:32 |
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I had a good weekend. It's been an incredibly stressful year for me, and I didn't think I'd be doing okay for a while, so that was really nice.
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Apr 27, 2020 16:49
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Failson posted:I had a good weekend. It's been an incredibly stressful year for me, and I didn't think I'd be doing okay for a while, so that was really nice. 
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Apr 27, 2020 17:08
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My boss just asked if there was something "blocking me" from my work. I can only assume this is code for "Why the gently caress haven't you finished something you said would take less than a week in three weeks". I said I was stressed out from working at home and having to deal with moving (which is true) but I am on thin ice already. gently caress gently caress gently caress gently caress gently caress gently caress. I wish someone just yelled at me already. At least acknowledge that the fact that I do NOTHING for weeks on end is bad. Don't just mention this in my yearly evaluation. Care about my career, my productivity. SOMETHING. How can I be responsible for everything related to my career? How do I know if I am learning something useful? I want mentorship, to grow. I don't care about our tiny company's lovely product that will not be sold anyway. The gently caress am I going to do? I don't know how to do ANYTHING. And no one cares about this. I tell my parents and they think I am selling myself short. I scream about how I do NOTHING all day, and they think I am exaggerating. They sometimes ask if my day has been productive and I often lie. I don't work, I don't cook, I don't work out, I jump from reading to Internet to videogames never staying long in one thing and my entire day is utterly wasted. My house is dirty, I keep my blinds closed at all times so people can't look in and see how dirty it is. I haven't done laundry in a month. Nobody cares. NOBODY CARES. I am going to die in a ditch and NOBODY CARES. AceOfFlames has issued a correction as of 17:33 on Apr 27, 2020 |
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Apr 27, 2020 17:18
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AceOfFlames posted:My boss just asked if there was something "blocking me" from my work. I can only assume this is code for "Why the gently caress haven't you finished something you said would take less than a week in three weeks". I said I was stressed out from working at home and having to deal with moving (which is true) but I am on thin ice already. gently caress gently caress gently caress gently caress gently caress gently caress. But have you had that conversation with your boss?
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Apr 27, 2020 18:14
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xcheopis posted:But have you had that conversation with your boss? Having trouble being productive at home and stressed out from moving? Yes. Everything else? Why would I tell him that I am utterly incompetent and insane? I did every so often ask for feedback and all I got was "You're doing better" a couple of times and I dunno if that is still his opinion.
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Apr 27, 2020 18:22
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AceOfFlames posted:My boss just asked if there was something "blocking me" from my work. I can only assume this is code for "Why the gently caress haven't you finished something you said would take less than a week in three weeks". I said I was stressed out from working at home and having to deal with moving (which is true) but I am on thin ice already. gently caress gently caress gently caress gently caress gently caress gently caress. do you care? maybe you should try some antidepressant and see if that can help you at least do laundry and stuff, and go from there
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Apr 27, 2020 18:29
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got any sevens posted:do you care? I am going to the pharmacy to pick up my new prescription tomorrow. Today it was closed since it's a holiday.
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Apr 27, 2020 18:31
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AceOfFlames posted:Having trouble being productive at home and stressed out from moving? Yes. Everything else? Why would I tell him that I am utterly incompetent and insane? I did every so often ask for feedback and all I got was "You're doing better" a couple of times and I dunno if that is still his opinion. No, have you had a conversation with your boss about mentorships and so forth. Ask for feedback.
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Apr 27, 2020 18:44
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I dunno if it's because I haven't been sleeping well the last couple days or my depression has come back, or a cyclical combination of both, but I'm really starting to worry about the endgame for all this COVID-19 business. Places in the US are re-opening. My home province is looking at loosening restrictions mid-May. I know Canada is doing a lot better on the whole, but without a vaccine or treatment in place....is this just like, it? Are they just cool with a number of us getting infected and calling it a day? I also went through a break up because of this whole thing and I know this is incredibly first world problem, but I'm 32 now and I always wanted to get married. Dating seems kind of over now, and who knows what this is all going to look like when the dust settles. All this on top of worrying about my parents getting exposed, my grandma, and how each day bleeds into the next under quarantine and well, yeah. It's getting a bit much for my anxiety. I mean, I am still working remotely as a teacher, so I should count my blessings. But I could do with a little bit of light at the end of the tunnel, ya know?
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Apr 27, 2020 20:58
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Doctor posted:...but I'm 32 now and I always wanted to get married. Although I'm a "forever alone" type I can assure you that the dating scene does not have an expiration date, and even in my fifties I still see people in my cohort chasing after their dreams. No matter how weird or different our world is when this crisis fades you will still have the same opportunities to pursue your relationship goals.
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Apr 27, 2020 21:19
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Dick Trauma posted:Although I'm a "forever alone" type I can assure you that the dating scene does not have an expiration date, and even in my fifties I still see people in my cohort chasing after their dreams. No matter how weird or different our world is when this crisis fades you will still have the same opportunities to pursue your relationship goals. Thanks. I'm sure you're right. I went for a walk and did some workouts and am feeling better now. Relationships have never been easy for me so this feels like the universe spitting in my face for getting into a relationship just recently that seemed good...until it wasn't.
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Apr 27, 2020 23:35
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AceOfFlames posted:My boss just asked if there was something "blocking me" from my work. I can only assume this is code for "Why the gently caress haven't you finished something you said would take less than a week in three weeks". I said I was stressed out from working at home and having to deal with moving (which is true) but I am on thin ice already. gently caress gently caress gently caress gently caress gently caress gently caress. I feel this way frequently, I really couldn't put it any better myself. Executive dysfunction is one of the shittier ADHD symptoms to deal with without counseling or medication. It also strikes me as imposter syndrome. You might be overestimating how much most people actually do and using that overestimation to shame yourself for not doing enough. Whether or not it's true that you don't do enough, attacking yourself for not doing enough is just another way for your executive dysfunction to get you to not do the poo poo you're not doing. This problem is why I didn't finish my doctorate - I got all the way done with coursework and this exact problem you're describing stopped me from being able to write my dissertation. It sucks! But it's also a relief to finally get away from academia because I lived in this state for like a whole decade, guilting myself over it, constantly self-hating because I didn't achieve what I 'should have'. The truth is, academia was never right for me BECAUSE I don't operate well with this specific type of deadline/pressure/work structure in general. But now that I'm out of academia I do still struggle with this somewhat, because on a basic level that's ME causing that problem. But certain environments and situations make it way, way worse. So I got out of that one and am doing something else now where I feel like I can manage it and my anxiety while still getting stuff done. I hope you can change your approach to yourself from raging at yourself for not doing things, to taking positive steps and celebrating them, no matter how small. The hardest part of beating executive dysfunction is getting started. I hope your new prescriptions help with all this too.
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Apr 28, 2020 00:33
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Ah poo poo my coworker didn't show up to work today. I think she's burned out. That means I'm hosed and working from home is over.  So stressed. Even being two hours late fucks us up.
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Apr 28, 2020 02:01
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UnfortunateSexFart posted:Ah poo poo my coworker didn't show up to work today. I think she's burned out. That means I'm hosed and working from home is over. Handjob factory? But seriously sorry my goon.
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Apr 28, 2020 02:16
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im just posting to say I'm thankful I've got my relative health and my spouse has hers. we're both still working and in hellworld america 2020, so that's not nothing
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Apr 28, 2020 02:20
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AceOfFlames posted:My boss just asked if there was something "blocking me" from my work. I can only assume this is code for "Why the gently caress haven't you finished something you said would take less than a week in three weeks". I said I was stressed out from working at home and having to deal with moving (which is true) but I am on thin ice already. gently caress gently caress gently caress gently caress gently caress gently caress. I dont think nobody cares when people in your life tell you youre selling yourself short, sometimes people are trying to tell you to be kinder to yourself and they dont have the right words for you. There are a lot of strategies you can learn to manage your productivity and become closer to the version of yourself you want to be but being relentlessly hard on yourself isnt going to do that. When Im depressed I feel useless and I am useless because I can barely function but beating myself up over that has never pulled me out of it but kindness helps sometimes only a little but it helps. Im sorry youre hurting right now. Maybe set a few goals (like doing your laundry) and promise yourself youll try to be patient with yourself because youre struggling right now and things are hard.
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Apr 28, 2020 02:30
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Trixie Hardcore posted:Handjob factory? Feels like it but no, online phone retailer. The more poo poo gets delayed the more customers complain and the more work there is. She finally showed up but we were already barely clinging on to the workload. We need a third person doing our role goddammit. We sell $1 mill plus phones per month and only have 15 total employees.
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Apr 28, 2020 04:33
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I felt like poo poo the past few days and got nothing done, then remembered my vitamin D ran out and I hadn't bought more. So I got some and now feel way better. Don't forget the vita D folks!
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Apr 28, 2020 09:30
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grief is the price we pay for love
Comatoast has issued a correction as of 18:32 on Apr 28, 2020 |
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Apr 28, 2020 17:22
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Ive completely detached from politics these past few weeks and its done me a world of good. Ive even found me an art project to work on when things get a little freer. then I accidentally opened twitter and Im back to thinking whats the loving point? I mean, I know that the system depends on people staying out of it but how do I involve myself without burning myself out like the hotheaded rear end in a top hat that i always am?
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Apr 28, 2020 19:07
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Gene Hackman Fan posted:Ive completely detached from politics these past few weeks and its done me a world of good. Ive even found me an art project to work on when things get a little freer. I take one day at a time and do what's in front of me. I haven't the energy for anything else.
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Apr 28, 2020 19:08
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Get outside if at all possible, whenever and wherever possible. Florida shut down the state parks but the county parks in my area are still open, so I picked up hammocks for the wife and I at Costco. We've just been stringing them up anywhere we can find and hanging out in the fresh air anytime we feel anything gloomy, even during workdays, instead of just suffering 24/7 in our dark yellow apartment where the emotional residue of all our fights lives. Just that one change has done more for our relationship and my mental health than anything else we've tried in the last few years. I found a handful of really cool places that I never knew where here, and I even built up enough energy to start biking again at one of them. I think I might actually be better off now than pre-quarantine. Your county probably has a list of public parks on their website, so that's a good place to start. We literally spent a couple weekends just working our way down the list, then looked at Google Maps and found a couple more that were unlisted. We ended up with a half a dozen spots we both love that we can rotate through, several of which have features other than just shade trees (little beaches, disc golf courses, etc). Most of the time I'm just laying in my hammock with my laptop, doing the same goon poo poo I'd be doing at home. But doing it out in the fresh air with birds singing and the sun shining makes a world of difference. I recommend the hammock, but you could probably have almost as nice of a time with just a camping chair. Start small. It's legit the only thing keeping me sane right now, and I know mental health is not one-size-fits-all, but I thought it might be worth shouting about in case it also helps someone else.
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Apr 28, 2020 19:33
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I'm breaking down over having both near zero productivity and having to move. Now I was brought to the verge of tears over commissioning someone to install a floor on the place I am renting (a quirk of the Netherlands. Apparently they think the floor is part of furniture so it doesn't come standard). I can't take the time to go to the hardware store during work hours because I am afraid of getting called, my parents are yelling because I want a service I found online but they say I can't choose a floor based on online pictures (mailing samples takes time I don't have), my coworkers who are also moving managed to get some friends to carry the planks but when I said I don't know anyone who drives in this country just went "Geez" as if to say "the hell is wrong with you" and gave me the contact of some guy who advertises on Facebook just with pictures of vans (no way I am going with this since he might be a scammer or worse). So I might have to spend weeks on a concrete floor or go with a total crapshoot. All in the middle of a pandemic. I can't take it anymore. Moving out of my parents house was a mistake. I clearly cannot handle adulting. AceOfFlames has issued a correction as of 20:45 on Apr 28, 2020 |
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Apr 28, 2020 20:43
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AceOfFlames posted:I'm breaking down over having both near zero productivity and having to move. Now I was brought to the verge of tears over commissioning someone to install a floor on the place I am renting (a quirk of the Netherlands. Apparently they think the floor is part of furniture so it doesn't come standard). I can't take the time to go to the hardware store during work hours because I am afraid of getting called, my parents are yelling because I want a service I found online but they say I can't choose a floor based on online pictures (mailing samples takes time I don't have), my coworkers who are also moving managed to get some friends to carry the planks but when I said I don't know anyone who drives in this country just went "Geez" as if to say "the hell is wrong with you" and gave me the contact of some guy who advertises on Facebook just with pictures of vans (no way I am going with this since he might be a scammer or worse). So I might have to spend weeks on a concrete floor or go with a total crapshoot. All in the middle of a pandemic. Why can't you use the online service? What's it got to do with your parents, why are they involved? Does your new landlord maybe have an idea of what to do? This all sounds really stressful mate, I'm sorry this is going on.
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Apr 28, 2020 20:51
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Unsinkabear posted:Get outside if at all possible, whenever and wherever possible. Florida shut down the state parks but the county parks in my area are still open, so I picked up hammocks for the wife and I at Costco. We've just been stringing them up anywhere we can find and hanging out in the fresh air anytime we feel anything gloomy, even during workdays, instead of just suffering 24/7 in our dark yellow apartment where the emotional residue of all our fights lives. Just that one change has done more for our relationship and my mental health than anything else we've tried in the last few years. I found a handful of really cool places that I never knew where here, and I even built up enough energy to start biking again at one of them. I think I might actually be better off now than pre-quarantine. yeah, i've been outside lots today, but when something rubs me the wrong way, it sticks with me until i find a resolution to it. and a lot of poo poo has rubbed me the wrong way today. a relative got to arguing about whistleblowers w/ me today and decided to ask me "if you're so smart, why aren't you rich?" as if my unemployment hasn't bothered me the entire time i've been job-hunting since loving may. along with everybody and their loving cousin telling me what i *should* be doing, this time learning "cyber security so you could work from home." Because why the gently caress not learn an entirely new trade, considering i haven't used anything from the degree i already have. it's my fault, really. i coulda went for a real major instead of flittering away at something as useless as business. this will be another career field i'll be getting into and i turn forty loving years old next month, and there's no loving guarantee it will lead to a job, much less a stable one. if one is supposed to imagine sisyphus happy, what do i do when i'm not? Gene Hackman Fan has issued a correction as of 22:52 on Apr 28, 2020 |
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Apr 28, 2020 20:57
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The problem with the online service is that I only have the online photos to go on. Their showroom is very far away and all public transport is only for emergencies. I get my parents involved because they know a lot more about this sort of thing than me. Plus they said they'd help with the costs.
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Apr 28, 2020 20:57
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Please someone talk me out of cashing out my retirement entirely to pay debt because I've black pilled myself into thinking I'm going to die of climate change or something else before I get the chance to retire.
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Apr 28, 2020 21:46
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LionYeti posted:Please someone talk me out of cashing out my retirement entirely to pay debt because I've black pilled myself into thinking I'm going to die of climate change or something else before I get the chance to retire. How about "Why pay your debt if you're going to die before you retire?"
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Apr 28, 2020 21:57
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LionYeti posted:Please someone talk me out of cashing out my retirement entirely to pay debt because I've black pilled myself into thinking I'm going to die of climate change or something else before I get the chance to retire. First things first. Tapping retirement right now assumes 100% that we're all loving dead, and we don't know anything about the future for certain. (The next person who flies in here to scream at me over this is getting a sixer, by the way, so don't be an rear end in a top hat.) You are much better keeping the money, because if you're not doomed you'll need it, and if you are then it doesn't matter. Are you underwater right now? In other words, are you losing money every month because you can't meet your debts? If so, I would look into bankruptcy first. It will shred your credit, and the main issue with that is getting apartments from shady assholes. But, if you meet means testing, I THINK you get to discharge debt and keep your retirement account SEE A LAWYER OH GOD I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT. If that's not a good fit for you, figure out how much you need to stop losing money and attack that and only that. You don't want to dump all of it unless you have to. If you're not in the red, I cannot strongly recommend enough against taking retirement funds. The market tends to bounce back over a decade and you'll recover anything you've lost plus extra gains in any money you put in now.
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Apr 28, 2020 22:00
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LionYeti posted:Please someone talk me out of cashing out my retirement entirely to pay debt because I've black pilled myself into thinking I'm going to die of climate change or something else before I get the chance to retire. For me retirement funds are an experiment. I don't expect to retire, even if I live to retirement age. I don't expect the money in the fund to make any real difference. It's just an experiment to see what happens. So I leave it alone and continue contributing as much as I can, out of curiosity.
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Apr 28, 2020 22:01
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xcheopis posted:How about "Why pay your debt if you're going to die before you retire?" Its a now problem while lack of retirement is a 30 years from now problem
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Apr 28, 2020 22:38
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Comatoast posted:grief is the price we pay for love It's true. I saw your original post, and I've been there, and as trite as it sounds, it may take a while, but you can get through it.
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Apr 28, 2020 23:25
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AceOfFlames posted:Yes. Hope she can help. Bit then again, can anyone? I told her one of my goals was."finding out what I want out of life" and "become a more functional person" and she said that was a "little vague". I'm starting to think I have zero concept of self and autonomy. I don't have my own opinions save for my progressive values and beliefs that everyone should be respected and treated well except for those who don't. I don't decorate my house. I drifted through my career. I hardly have any hobbies anymore. I feel like my life is a slow march towards death. Am I a lost cause? I'm going through something similar right now.
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Apr 29, 2020 00:20
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AceOfFlames posted:Yes. Hope she can help. Bit then again, can anyone? I told her one of my goals was."finding out what I want out of life" and "become a more functional person" and she said that was a "little vague". I'm starting to think I have zero concept of self and autonomy. I don't have my own opinions save for my progressive values and beliefs that everyone should be respected and treated well except for those who don't. I don't decorate my house. I drifted through my career. I hardly have any hobbies anymore. I feel like my life is a slow march towards death. Am I a lost cause? You are not a lost cause. I felt the exaaact same way when I started therapy, even down to the life factors. Maybe this is just a normal depression vibe? But without even realizing it until I read this post, I have gradually built more and more of a sense of who I am and what I need from those sessions in the short term. I had to change therapists once to get there. YMMV, but you already did the hard part.
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Apr 29, 2020 04:33
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My brain is all hosed up and the world is too. I can't talk to anyone about this without feeling like I'm putting a burden on them.
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Apr 29, 2020 14:20
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Made my first Etsy sale to a stranger today (via forums ads). I had been depressed about it several days ago because I had only sold to people I know, so this is a big lift for me and my mood.138 posted:My brain is all hosed up and the world is too. I can't talk to anyone about this without feeling like I'm putting a burden on them. You can always vent here friendo, there are people listening who care
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Apr 29, 2020 16:13
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Way to go on the Etsy sale! Me today: *Hands in the air, at the top of the rollercoaster* "LOVE TO HAVE NO CONTROL OF MY EMOTIONS TODAY. WOOOOOOOOO." I know it will all settle into the usual exhaustion and despair soon.
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Apr 29, 2020 16:33
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Anyone here benefit from adding wellburtin to an existing zoloft prescription? Dr is recommending that as opposed to upping zoloft from 150 to 200.
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Apr 29, 2020 17:27
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| # ? May 26, 2024 00:32 |
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138 posted:My brain is all hosed up and the world is too. I can't talk to anyone about this without feeling like I'm putting a burden on them. have you looked into seeing a therapist? That is their profession and they have years of training so as not to take any burdensome feelings home with them.
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Apr 29, 2020 18:12
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