|
Ugly In The Morning posted:One of my favorite posts on this site was someone describing a fart as sounding like “a surprised James Earl Jones exclaiming the word “black!” lmao what
|
#
?
May 30, 2020 16:13
|
|
|
|
| # ? Jun 7, 2024 11:38 |
|
|
Randaconda posted:lmao what Bored posted:Found it! Hosted elsewhere. I have no clue why, but they included the source. ...and for anyone that hasn't archive dived this thread, DO IT ALREADY. You won't regret it. 
|
|
#
?
May 30, 2020 19:52
|
|
|
|
|
#
?
May 30, 2020 20:53
|
|
|
krinklechip posted:...and for anyone that hasn't archive dived this thread, DO IT ALREADY. You won't regret it. The original thread that is from was called “inopportune times to pass gas” and if anyone finds it they will be my hero.
|
|
#
?
May 30, 2020 22:45
|
|
|
Ugly In The Morning posted:The original thread that is from was called “inopportune times to pass gas” and if anyone finds it they will be my hero. https://web.archive.org/web/20100528081729/https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3238712 I think it got eaten during the archiving-is-hosed period. Unless it's in the mod forum? Only some of the pages got grabbed 
|
|
#
?
May 30, 2020 23:03
|
|
|
oldskool posted:https://web.archive.org/web/20100528081729/https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3238712 It’s so weird reading that with a word filter, I haven’t seen that in like a decade.
|
|
#
?
May 30, 2020 23:08
|
|
|
oldskool posted:https://web.archive.org/web/20100528081729/https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3238712
|
|
#
?
May 30, 2020 23:36
|
|
|
wolrah posted:Since the error message comes up with BYOB CSS while other threads posted around the same time load or have errors with normal CSS that would seem to imply that the thread exists in there but is invisible to normal users. Perhaps a BYOB mod or an admin could provide more details. Gonna quote this in the technical issues thread in QCS, maybe Jeffrey of YOSPOS can shed some light on it.
|
|
#
?
May 30, 2020 23:42
|
|
|
had some cocktails and then a 5$ chalupa box from taco bell and its just instant farts big round belters no smell thank goodness but these are just literally falling out my rear end
|
|
#
?
Jun 2, 2020 23:50
|
|
|
Ugly In The Morning posted:Gonna quote this in the technical issues thread in QCS, maybe Jeffrey of YOSPOS can shed some light on it.
|
|
#
?
Jun 3, 2020 05:49
|
|
|
Jeffrey of YOSPOS posted:I read this post and you can see old byob in the archives now. https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3238712
|
|
#
?
Jun 3, 2020 06:25
|
|
|
There's a dude in that thread named "FlameDarkfire" who got perma'd for watching anime child porn within days of posting extensively about his flatulence in that thread. That's the most perfect "SA in the 2000s" experience possible.
|
|
#
?
Jun 3, 2020 08:43
|
|
|
Antivehicular posted:There's a dude in that thread named "FlameDarkfire" who got perma'd for watching anime child porn within days of posting extensively about his flatulence in that thread. That's the most perfect "SA in the 2000s" experience possible. holy poo poo lol, it's true
|
|
#
?
Jun 3, 2020 09:20
|
|
|
Switched to quick oats for breakfast and now I have these long, dry farts
|
|
#
?
Jun 5, 2020 16:26
|
|
|
The oats are quick but the farts are forever.
|
|
#
?
Jun 5, 2020 16:45
|
|
|
Pissed Ape Sexist posted:Shameless crosspost theft
|
|
#
?
Jul 4, 2020 14:05
|
|
|
I had some greasy pot roast with a fuckload of vegetables for dinner, and for the past few hours I’ve had to test the waters and let the multiple and constant farts slip out tightly, like a balloon going “FWEEEEE” because it feels like a precursor to a shart each time. So far so good, BUT THERE IS SO MUCH GAS INSIDE OF ME. SO MUCH GAS.
|
|
#
?
Jul 5, 2020 03:21
|
|
|
You Are A Elf posted:I had some greasy pot roast with a fuckload of vegetables for dinner, and for the past few hours I’ve had to test the waters and let the multiple and constant farts slip out tightly, like a balloon going “FWEEEEE” because it feels like a precursor to a shart each time. The best is when you sit on the toilet for the a fart that you thought would be a shaft, but it’s just one huge thunderous fart that echos off the pot.
|
|
#
?
Aug 6, 2020 22:31
|
|
|
When I was in the army, I ended up going to a base where the normal army fare would’ve been a vast improvement over...whatever it was that we were consuming this had the effect of giving me bowel-shaking earthquakes of doubt and remorse, and smelled so bad that I could catch a whiff of it over the nearby sewage pit (the poo pond on Kandahar Airfield). This was still ongoing when I went to my next base, where I was going to be staying for the next few months or so. We had a particularly stupid/annoying sergeant major, and he had set up some fans in the area where he normally sat while he yelled at people to go do whatever stupid idea popped into his head. Unfortunately for him, a person could stand directly underneath where these fans were and be completely out of SGM’s line of sight. Using my rear end as a tool of revenge, I would stand under the fans and deflate my entire colon then just wait as my foul delivery was spread across the top deck of this area. Inevitably, I’d hear some exaggerated loud sniffing, then him barking at the guy next to him “HEY SERGEANT, DID YOU JUST poo poo YOUR PANTS AGAIN?!!!” I did this a lot, this man was actively and aggressively useless. Even the guy he was yelling at would comment at how bad the smell was, before professing his innocence through a shirt pulled up over his nose. Another: A guy I used to fence with weaponized his beer farts during a tournament. He’d advance just beyond where the round started, drop a radioactive cloud, then retreat into it. Whoever he was fencing would try to follow, and immediately get slapped in the face with a miasma of suffering; this is when he would score his points.
|
|
#
?
Nov 19, 2020 12:15
|
|
|
Icon Of Sin posted:When I was in the army, I ended up going to a base where the normal army fare would’ve been a vast improvement over...whatever it was that we were consuming this had the effect of giving me bowel-shaking earthquakes of doubt and remorse, and smelled so bad that I could catch a whiff of it over the nearby sewage pit (the poo pond on Kandahar Airfield). This was still ongoing when I went to my next base, where I was going to be staying for the next few months or so. Wow, I never even noticed that in “The Princess Bride...”
|
|
#
?
Nov 19, 2020 12:26
|
|
|
gently caress you all. I feel as though I’ve been granted a wish by an evil genie. Since we caught COVID, my wife said my farts have been the most vile she’s ever experienced. However this horrible illness has completely robbed me of my sense of smell, so I am unable to smell them and bask in all their glory myself. gently caress this cruel illness. Any silver lining is gone now. There is no justice in this horrible universe. I have been betrayed by man and cheated by God. I am the orphan of my own existence. Please think about this the next time you don’t wear a mask. You selfish assholes.
|
|
#
?
Jan 17, 2021 16:33
|
|
|
Before Christmas I bought some Halva and sliced it into one inch square by half inch deep slices. In a week at 24 hour intervals, I discovered: 2 slices. No problem. 3 - 5. Within hours, explosive, smelly farts. loving glorious. Beyond 5, the above combined with explosive diarrhetic shits with enough of difference that you're not tricked into thinking its just going to be a fart so you have (barely) enough time to reach the soon to be stained throne.
|
|
#
?
Jan 17, 2021 16:49
|
|
|
Bloodfart McCoy posted:gently caress you all. Horrible curse buy great username/post combo. PS Hot dogs and red wine...not even once.
|
|
#
?
Jan 17, 2021 16:50
|
|
|
Icon Of Sin posted:When I was in the army, I ended up going to a base where the normal army fare would’ve been a vast improvement over...whatever it was that we were consuming this had the effect of giving me bowel-shaking earthquakes of doubt and remorse, and smelled so bad that I could catch a whiff of it over the nearby sewage pit (the poo pond on Kandahar Airfield). This was still ongoing when I went to my next base, where I was going to be staying for the next few months or so. you really made that fart go the distance
|
|
#
?
Jan 17, 2021 18:30
|
|
|
I'm pretty sure weaponised farting is one of the oldest military traditions.
|
|
#
?
Jan 17, 2021 18:35
|
|
|
I bought this Whole Foods 365 brand muslie off Amazon and it is like rocket fuel. By 11am my gut is rumbling and by 11:30 I'm blasting these short yet bursting-with-power wet farts.
|
|
#
?
Jan 17, 2021 19:19
|
|
|
I’ve been waging a guerilla war at work by dropping just the gnarliest farts when a boss is coming and I have somewhere to duck away unseen. It got to the point where they had maintence pull the covers on the warehouse floor drains because they think something is rotting in there.
|
|
#
?
Jan 17, 2021 19:34
|
|
|
If y'all really want to have some weapons-grade farts apparently this soup is the way to do it: https://youtu.be/3DxS-CIJFj8 
|
|
#
?
Jan 17, 2021 21:00
|
|
|
If you don't laugh at this you are not alive. https://twitter.com/henryfraser0/status/1340619977519448065
|
|
#
?
Jan 29, 2021 19:28
|
|
|
When I was around ten years old I had to go to traffic court with my mother because she got a speeding ticket on the BQE. I was wearing shorts on a wooden bench and farted during a particularly quiet moment in the proceedings, it was deafening. All I could think of to do was look at my mother and yell "MOOOOOMMM!!" in an accusatory tone.
|
|
#
?
Jan 29, 2021 20:08
|
|
|
Pope Corky the IX posted:When I was around ten years old I had to go to traffic court with my mother because she got a speeding ticket on the BQE. I was wearing shorts on a wooden bench and farted during a particularly quiet moment in the proceedings, it was deafening. All I could think of to do was look at my mother and yell "MOOOOOMMM!!" in an accusatory tone. read this post then look at their av and title
|
|
#
?
Jan 29, 2021 20:13
|
|
|
I know you’ve all been concerned for me and I want to thank each of you for the outpouring of support you’ve given me. I just smelled a fart for the first time in a month since catching COVID. I am on the mend 
|
|
#
?
Feb 6, 2021 00:43
|
|
|
Bloodfart McCoy posted:I know you’ve all been concerned for me and I want to thank each of you for the outpouring of support you’ve given me. If ever there was an excuse for huffing your own farts...
|
|
#
?
Feb 6, 2021 01:18
|
|
|
Pershing posted:If ever there was an excuse for huffing your own farts... Literally me for the last month:  
|
|
#
?
Feb 6, 2021 14:31
|
|
|
Bloodfart McCoy posted:Literally me for the last month: "I Love the 90s" takes a weird turn
|
|
#
?
Feb 8, 2021 09:07
|
|
|
Bloodfart McCoy posted:Literally me for the last month: Ween’s followup to The Pod got weird.
|
|
#
?
Feb 8, 2021 10:12
|
|
|
Getting close to empty, better hit the ol station https://imgur.com/GGhjAxU https://v.redd.it/5meo9ocgu5l61
|
|
#
?
Mar 6, 2021 02:06
|
|
|
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q7NtIBiwr5U
|
|
#
?
Mar 6, 2021 05:55
|
|
|
When I get bored I read IMDB trivia and I found this gem from Evangeline Lillyquote:One time there was this guy who was really awful to me [when I was a flight attendant], and I was really struggling that day, because I had really bad gas. And as a flight attendant, you don't let that go when you're on a plane. So this guy got under my skin to the point that finally I decided to save it all up, and when I was walking past him and when I got to row 48... I let it rip, right in his face. https://www.imdb.com/name/nm1431940/bio?ref_=nm_ov_bio_sm Bonzo fucked around with this message at 00:10 on Mar 11, 2021 |
|
#
?
Mar 11, 2021 00:07
|
|
|
|
| # ? Jun 7, 2024 11:38 |
|
|
I love her so much. Watch her being interviewed by Craig Ferguson: The way she opens up because she’s comfortable and flirty (they are both married to other people at the time and on a stage in front of a live audience) makes her appear down to Earth and funny. Just real genuine. And crop dusting an rear end in a top hat? Then telling a story about it years later for a laugh? That’s a keeper right there, fellas.
|
|
#
?
Mar 11, 2021 04:59
|
|