(Thread IKs:
Josherino)
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thehandtruck posted:How is everyone? not too bad, how are you
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Jun 17, 2020 03:32
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Mechafunkzilla posted:not too bad, how are you Meh. Lots more time to read and go for walks so I'm suspiciously happy... thehandtruck has issued a correction as of 06:19 on Jun 17, 2020 |
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Jun 17, 2020 06:14
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UnfortunateSexFart posted:My 22 year old first time manager, who is manager only because I had just joined the company when he was promoted, keeps saying "you did this, don't do this" rather than asking me why I did things. I always have a good explanation and it's pissing me off. Makes me feel like I'm doing poorly at my job but it's really just his approach and I guess lack of respect for my intelligence. I've been doing similar jobs almost as long as he's been alive. gently caress managers, literally ruin every good job i've had trying to micromanage poo poo.
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Jun 17, 2020 06:54
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bobtheconqueror posted:Do you guys have like monthly 1 on 1 meetings or something like that. Might be good to bring that up tactfully. Like, "I don't know if you're doing this on purpose, but it comes off as really disrespectful and dismissive when you speak to me like this. Would it be possible to engage in a bit more dialogue when you need to provide feedback?" Could be a horrible idea if your work is super toxic though. No, no one on one meetings of any sort. My performance review after three months was done by his boss. I have been thinking about saying something but want to make sure I'm not just being paranoid as tone is difficult to discern over Slack. He's more friendly on the phone/in person. Either way he should be asking why I chose to do something first though.
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Jun 17, 2020 06:55
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err posted:gently caress managers, literally ruin every good job i've had trying to micromanage poo poo. Yeah I've had so many good jobs ruined by one management change. And I just end up quitting normally. But now the economy is hosed and I'm on a temporary visa so I won't get poo poo. I still like the job overall and he's not hopeless. For a 22 year old newbie he's very competent in general. Just wish he'd let me explain myself.
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Jun 17, 2020 07:00
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thehandtruck posted:How is everyone? i miss actual stimulants but i can't do them anymore i really miss actual people but i turn into a weird twitchy awkward rear end in a top hat when i open my mouth in front of anybody but my bf who i live with, even when i'm on the phone with my parents i'm all stupid and evasive now because i don't want to say that 90% of my day is being miserable and the other 10% is too stoned to think i miss the okay person that i was 10 years ago
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Jun 17, 2020 15:20
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thehandtruck posted:How is everyone? not depressed anymore, not anxious either coming to the rather unfortunate realization that 99% of my ability to be productive was a direct result of my high anxiety levels, though if we had universal basic income i would absolutely quit my job and find a way to survive on it
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Jun 17, 2020 16:03
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NofrikinfuN posted:not depressed anymore, not anxious either I think I'm in the same boat. Still keeping up with my hobbies but that's slowed down substantially now that I'm close to finishing my latest one (a friend is going through my latest draft rn). I dont feel depressed (ok maybe a little) or anxious but I also feel like I'm not doing anything useful to get on with my future. At the same time, I dont know what I want my future to look like. It's been bugging me.
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Jun 17, 2020 17:12
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err posted:gently caress managers, literally ruin every good job i've had trying to micromanage poo poo. I think it depends a lot on the organization. Some places will promote micromanagers, some promote those who have proven they can get the best out of their team members. I'm personally big on the servant leadership approach, and don't look at my position as one of authority, but rather as having the best overall view of who should work on what. I've found that the best way to get a team to produce good results is to treat the team members like adult human beings, remove blockages that they're having trouble with, and get the hell out of the way.
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Jun 17, 2020 18:09
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I'm having some weird issues with my therapist. About a month ago I sent her a text that I'd like to schedule a phone call to talk about her writing a letter for my VA claim. no response, it's a text. it happens then I scheduled an appointment using the webapp but she never confirmed it and no called/ no showed. in the last month I've called about once a week and left messages with no response. now, her website 404s. so uh, did my therapist ghost me? full disclosure: I'm bananas and checked the obits, nothing there.
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Jun 17, 2020 19:18
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Consummate Professional posted:I'm having some weird issues with my therapist. Sorry to hear your therapist is unresponsive and went radio silent with you. You can check your state's licensing board to see if they have been suspended or to file a complaint as (at least from a social work perspective) ghosting a client who you are providing services to can be a violation.
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Jun 17, 2020 20:00
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Anyone having a serious existential crises as of late? I've become incredibly cognizant of my mortality, and it's kinda dominating my thoughts. Like the idea of complete annihilation of your consciousness after death is loving me up. At the same time I know that I won't be able to perceive it or even know that it happened, so it's kinda pointless to worry about. I've been reading 'Man's Search for Meaning' by Viktor Frankl, and also the following article and it's sorta helped cement my acceptance of the concept, but despite that it's still frightening at a gut level. Like the idea immediately brings to mind the Steven King short story 'The Jaunt' or that Christmas episode of Black Mirror, though I know those aren't really applicable given they're dealing with the concept of being conscious for an eternity, but I can't really not make that connection in my head. I'm probably more worried about dying painfully, or of my kids or wife dying an unexpected or premature death, and that going through something like that would completely break me. No point in worrying about 'what ifs' you have no control over, and yet here I am. Any reading recommendations that might have helped others with the same worries?
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Jun 17, 2020 20:58
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I am NOT SUICIDAL but drat I am deeply, profoundly sad.
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Jun 18, 2020 00:48
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Frog Act posted:to continue my infrequent effort to add positive posts here, i just moved into my first apartment today. i'm 30 and i've lived with my parents my whole life but my girlfriend and i got a place and after an incredibly exhausting day we have all the big stuff and one of the cats (still gotta catnap mine from my parents house) here. it's gonna be a long road unpacking but for the first time in my life i'm sitting at my desk in my apartment smoking my weed on my computer with my electricity i've paid for, etc etc, and it's a bit of a weird feeling tbh. After I first started posting in here I took the dubious decision to go back and read the whole thread. It was hard work but pretty valuable, and I've gained a lot of insight into my own brain by reading things I identify with but could never put into words. You wrote a number of those things, Frog Act, so thank you for that first of all. I'm so pleased for you that you finally have your own place and that you and your girlfriend are doing well together after all you've both been through.
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Jun 18, 2020 01:23
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Stockwell posted:Anyone having a serious existential crises as of late? I've become incredibly cognizant of my mortality, and it's kinda dominating my thoughts. Like the idea of complete annihilation of your consciousness after death is loving me up. At the same time I know that I won't be able to perceive it or even know that it happened, so it's kinda pointless to worry about. Oh definitely. It's gotta be way more common now. Quarantine is like this world solipsism and time has no meaning and the country hates itself. On the death part. Ya it's scary as gently caress but I picked a spiritual practice/alignment that deals with that pretty nicely so at least there's that. But I do have those wild and surreal thoughts and they do bother me. But what I found was that they only come at times when I'm really anxious about something else that I can't deal with or have pushed away. Like when I started school again I was having horrible existential thoughts but magically on a completely unrelated note when I dealt with the anxiety of school (or passed on its own) those thoughts weren't coming up or they weren't bothering me. I think they're just great containers to place our fears and anxiety because they are unbeatable in a way, some of them you can't actually solve. Whereas dealing with the anxiety of fatherhood or living a good life, those are doable and therefore in a weird way even more scary.
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Jun 18, 2020 01:59
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Stockwell posted:Anyone having a serious existential crises as of late? Hey friendo I don't have much to help but I do have solidarity. A family friend got stabbed a few days ago and is in rough shape, so mortality consideration is kinda on my rear end right now, especially living with my mom who's getting up there in age as well.
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Jun 18, 2020 06:37
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im having the existentials hard, and often thinking of leaving the united states because i just can't see a future here that doesn't involve ongoing poverty at best and a concentration camp at worst dunno how to do that as a person with a sketchy job history and no money dunno if it's even right to do that, if the struggle is here ugh blugh i don't feel abject despair abt the societal situation, i think we will get through it, but idk if i will specifically and it's fuckin me up
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Jun 18, 2020 09:17
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Tarnop posted:After I first started posting in here I took the dubious decision to go back and read the whole thread. It was hard work but pretty valuable, and I've gained a lot of insight into my own brain by reading things I identify with but could never put into words. You wrote a number of those things, Frog Act, so thank you for that first of all. I'm so pleased for you that you finally have your own place and that you and your girlfriend are doing well together after all you've both been through. thanks friend! i'm really glad to hear it. i see so much of myself in the other goons here and it means a lot to know other people feel the same way. i keep reading this thread exactly because i want to see things improve for all the thread regulars and despite the hard times it's great to see that happening, even in fits, because every step forward is meaningful no matter how "small" it might feel.
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Jun 18, 2020 16:22
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So I officially have to go back to the office as of Monday. Theyre taking lots of precautions and theres very few people there but Im still extremely nervous. Whats good is that my office manager is taking things very seriously so theyre even doing things like one-way routes through the building and desks well more than 6 feet apart, and I think even something with AC system. Its just dumb as hell because I was able to do WFH for several weeks with no issues but apparently there was enough of an efficiency problem that theyre just gonna phase people back in slowly. Im amused/annoyed by my constant anxiety and imposter syndrome making me feel like Im terrible at my job and then it turns out Im one of the first people asked back. Lol owned. Also I dont think I remember how to talk to people and I was never good at it in the first place!!
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Jun 18, 2020 23:45
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Haven't checked in much but Cymbalta is going well. Maybe one depressive episode of a few days in the past three-four weeks, which is a vast improvement. I have the energy for side gigs now which helps. I also have been sleeping better for several weeks. I'm still super anxious but the depression is subsiding and not hitting as hard when it does come. So all in all I'm pleased with the medication.
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Jun 19, 2020 06:18
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PsychedelicWarlord posted:Haven't checked in much but Cymbalta is going well. Maybe one depressive episode of a few days in the past three-four weeks, which is a vast improvement. I have the energy for side gigs now which helps. I also have been sleeping better for several weeks. I'm still super anxious but the depression is subsiding and not hitting as hard when it does come. So all in all I'm pleased with the medication. How long have you been on it? When I started on fluoxetine I noticed my mood regulating super quick but I had like a rising anxiety for the first two weeks or so. (This was also when the shutdowns kicked off) I've never felt more emotionally stable and was even able to argue with my wife about divorce issues without losing my temper, where before the medication I was having daily bouts of suicidal ideation, even looking up whether my life insurance policy would pay out in the event. Now it's like it doesn't cross my mind. Things that would have normally ruined my mood for hours can now be processed and discarded almost instantly. It's strange, because I had expected less with everyone saying "it's not a magic bullet". In a way it is, because emotional responses dictate every moment of your life. Anyway, sorry for the tangent, I'm glad to hear things are turning around for you. Can I ask how your sleep has changed? In my case, I suddenly wake up before my alarm almost every single day. Prior to the medication I hit snooze probably half a dozen times and felt like my brains were scrambled by the time I got up. It's also shockingly easy to get to sleep at night.
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Jun 19, 2020 16:39
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NofrikinfuN posted:It's strange, because I had expected less with everyone saying "it's not a magic bullet". In a way it is, because emotional responses dictate every moment of your life. Thats rad your meds work so well! I think the reason people say its not a magic bullet is because the majority of people wont necessarily find something with perfect results right away with most psych meds. The results vary so much individually compared to meds for most physical issues. Even partial relief is absolutely worth it though.
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Jun 19, 2020 17:09
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NofrikinfuN posted:How long have you been on it? When I started on fluoxetine I noticed my mood regulating super quick but I had like a rising anxiety for the first two weeks or so. (This was also when the shutdowns kicked off) I've never felt more emotionally stable and was even able to argue with my wife about divorce issues without losing my temper, where before the medication I was having daily bouts of suicidal ideation, even looking up whether my life insurance policy would pay out in the event. Now it's like it doesn't cross my mind. Things that would have normally ruined my mood for hours can now be processed and discarded almost instantly. I used to take hours to fall asleep and now it's only taking like 15-20 minutes. And I am having fewer nightmares. I know medicine isn't a magic bullet but taking fluoxetine every morning has basically turned things around for me. Still have ups and downs but my baseline is much better than it was. Glad to hear it is working for you, too. I was skeptical after having some issues with Lexapro but I'm happy with my dose and prescription here. 
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Jun 20, 2020 03:44
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So Im sure its a violation to quote my own post from another thread, but I posted this initially in the COVID-19 thread and it now occurs to me that this might be the better place for itRobert Plant posted:My very large immediate familys been having regular get-togethers for every holiday and also for no reason at all for pretty much the duration. I havent been going and today my mom flipped out on me, cursed me out and hung up on me when I told her that Im not coming to the Fathers Day get-together tomorrow. I was gonna stop by to drop off my dads present today instead and she told me that if Im not coming tomorrow that I shouldnt bother going there today Basically my whole immediate family is firmly right wing and operating under the assumption that the virus is being overblown/fake news, so while I have some sympathy from my sister for the ugliness of the whole thing shes also still going to all of these parties. I dont want my relationship with my parents to fall apart even if they are being incredibly ignorant and irresponsible. Im sure a lot of you fine people have been having similar issues with family during this, any advice on how to talk through this poo poo?
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Jun 20, 2020 23:34
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Robert Plant posted:So Im sure its a violation to quote my own post from another thread, but I posted this initially in the COVID-19 thread and it now occurs to me that this might be the better place for it avoid any angle that's political. tell them you're choosing to stay away for their health because you love them and give a poo poo about them. you don't want to be the one to inadvertently give them an illness that could kill them. maybe if they hear that you're not doing this because lolpolitics they'll be slightly more receptive and at least understand your choice, even if it won't change what they do. if they're really bad it might just be best to avoid any discussion about it at all. "I'm going to drop off his gift, hope you have a nice day" and don't even engage otherwise. sorry you're having to deal with this.
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Jun 20, 2020 23:54
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Crusty Nutsack posted:avoid any angle that's political. tell them you're choosing to stay away for their health because you love them and give a poo poo about them. you don't want to be the one to inadvertently give them an illness that could kill them. maybe if they hear that you're not doing this because lolpolitics they'll be slightly more receptive and at least understand your choice, even if it won't change what they do. if they're really bad it might just be best to avoid any discussion about it at all. "I'm going to drop off his gift, hope you have a nice day" and don't even engage otherwise. Thanks for this, its good advice. Im inclined to think that they are in fact that bad, and so I really dont know how much Im going to be heard no matter what I say, but at some point my dad and I are going to have some kind of conversation about all this, and it would be wise to steer it away from politics as much as possible, for both our sakes Thanks again
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Jun 21, 2020 00:17
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My 75 year old dad has been diagnosed with cancer. He wasn't a very good dad (self centered workaholic) and I haven't seen him since February 2019 but he is a good dude overall and one of the few boomer leftists. Sucks that I don't even have the option of leaving the country to see him and probably won't for another year.
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Jun 21, 2020 05:00
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Stockwell posted:Anyone having a serious existential crises as of late? I've become incredibly cognizant of my mortality, and it's kinda dominating my thoughts. Like the idea of complete annihilation of your consciousness after death is loving me up. At the same time I know that I won't be able to perceive it or even know that it happened, so it's kinda pointless to worry about. The book Mindfulness in Plain English followed by learning about Bhuddism really helped me with this kind of catastrophizing/rumination. I didn't actually need to become a Buddhist, just reading about Bhuddism was enough to help me. I still do it, but it's easier to manage now. I got into it after a friend died and it's been helpful during COVID. Good luck buddy. Edit: Here's something from Instant Zen by Foyan that's really been helping me recently with similar worries. If you haven't studied Chinese zen before the no-eggplant idea (which is the most important part) might be a little cryptic but even then it's kind of comforting to know that people 1000 years ago on the other side of the earth were struggling too: Generally speaking, practical application of Zen requires detachment from thoughts. This method of Zen saves the most energy. It just requires you to detach from emotional thoughts, and understand that there is nothing concrete in the realms of desire, form, and formlessness; only then can you apply Zen practically. If you try to practice it otherwise, it will seem bitterly painful by comparison. Once there was a disciplinarian monk who had kept the precepts all his life. As he was walking one night, he stepped on something that squished, which he imagined to be a frog, a mother frog laden with eggs. Mortified at the thought of having killed a pregnant frog, when the monk went to sleep that night he dreamed that hundreds of frogs came to him demanding his life. He was utterly terrified. Come morning, the monk went to look for the frog he had squashed, and found that it had only been an overripe eggplant. At that moment, the monks perplexities abruptly ceased; realising there is nothing concrete in the world, for the first time he was really able to apply it practically in life. Now I ask you, when he stepped on it by night, was it a frog or an eggplant? If it was a frog, yet when he looked at dawn it was an eggplant; if it was an eggplant, yet there were frogs demanding his life the night before. Can you decide? Ill try to decide for you: Feelings of frogs may be shed, but the idea of eggplant remains. If you would be free of the idea of eggplant, strike the evening chime at noon. IAMKOREA has issued a correction as of 20:07 on Jun 21, 2020 |
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Jun 21, 2020 19:48
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Some random woman grabbed my crotch and open mouth kissed me on the lips this weekend and I feel loving gross. This poo poo keeps happening to me, I don't know why some women think it's okay to do that but it sucks and I don't feel like there's anything I can do about it other than not be at bars.
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Jun 21, 2020 23:29
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i was diagnosed with bipolar ii back in 2013 after extremely bad reactions to SSRIs and SNRIs, and i haven't been on medication for a few years. it has worsened (and i began binge drinking) to the point when i think i had a full blown manic episode when a friend passed away early in the year. her passing inspired me to quit drinking. after a mild alcohol withdrawal period that i quickly recovered from, i kept on experiencing more extreme elevated moods for a few weeks to the point where i couldn't speak in a normal word order without really trying to concentrate and would hallucinate, especially while trying to wind down to go to sleep. i've had a couple significant ups and downs since then, and nothing as severe as that, but i'm drinking again and more than ever. i live in the us and have insurance. i don't have a pcp. is telepsychiatry a thing post-corona? i travel for work about 80% right now which is not sustainable but i can't change things up for a while. i was previously on anticonvulsants and generally felt a lot more stable then.
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Jun 22, 2020 02:06
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It's how I see my docs right now both my therapist and psychiatrist offer telehealth.
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Jun 22, 2020 02:11
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Yes, Telehealth should be an option. I use video chat for both my therapist and doctor. Today's my first day Latuda-free for now. Been, dare I say, hypomanic the past several days and it's felt mostly good with some minor side effects. Wondering how I will be once I come off the high feeling.
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Jun 22, 2020 13:00
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PsychedelicWarlord posted:I used to take hours to fall asleep and now it's only taking like 15-20 minutes. And I am having fewer nightmares. I know medicine isn't a magic bullet but taking fluoxetine every morning has basically turned things around for me. Still have ups and downs but my baseline is much better than it was. Now that you mention it, I've been having an easier time falling asleep as well. Sometimes too easy and I fall asleep in the recliner, but going to bed I haven't been having the racing thoughts and stuff at night.
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Jun 22, 2020 18:26
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Had a good brain streak, but I think I caught a cold, didnt sleep last night, called in sick today, and now Im worried Ill be fired for doing so. It sucks to be in my head.
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Jun 23, 2020 04:49
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there is nothing quite as jaw-achingly stressful as the bone-deep certainty that you have done something that your lovely corporate bosses will consider a fireable offense even when that thing is a completely reasonable thing like taking needed time off I am right there with you atm and I wish I had advice for dealing with it besides gritting your teeth tbh. it is demoralizing knowing more or less exactly how much value your lovely employer extracts from your labor and knowing that doesn't actually matter next to some fragile illusion of productivity
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Jun 23, 2020 16:50
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Have any of yall with depression and/or anxiety issues ever heard of, or used, a Fisher Wallace Stimulator as a form of treatment? And if so, does it work at all? I ask because theres a pretty steep discount on it right now (62% off, which makes it $300 instead of the $800 it would normally cost) and Im thinking about jumping on that, but that discount is only gonna last about another 14 hours, so I gotta make a choice quick. $300 would pretty much wipe out whats left of my bank account, but I dont know if theyll ever be this cheap again (kinda doubt it). It IS possible to get insurance to pay for all/part of it with a doctors prescription possibly for free; I need to double-check the price with a script plus insurance on the site but my psych is reluctant to write me a script for one because Im in a stable place with my medication right now and he doesnt want to fix what aint broke, and honestly Im not sure if my insurance would cover any of it even if I had a prescription. I still want to at least try it out though. It apparently uses a scaled-down form of transcranial magnetic stimulation that can be used at home. TMS therapy has been around for at least a decade or two and it apparently works great for a lot of people I have friends whove done it and swear by it, and Ive personally been told by no less than two different psychs that it actually IS effective at treating depression and is not bullshit but the big machines doctors use to do TMS in clinical places are normally only for treating major depression, which isnt the form I have, and we dont know how well theyd work on me. A Fisher Wallace Stimulator supposedly works on other, less severe forms of depression like what Ive got. They have tons of good reviews, but in this day and age who really knows if those are trustworthy or not 
I. M. Gei has issued a correction as of 02:27 on Jun 24, 2020 |
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Jun 24, 2020 02:22
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No experience with TMS or Fischer-Wallace, so I can't say, I'm sorry.Reene posted:there is nothing quite as jaw-achingly stressful as the bone-deep certainty that you have done something that your lovely corporate bosses will consider a fireable offense even when that thing is a completely reasonable thing like taking needed time off Hope you're doing okay! Survived going back to work. Still have a job. Still struggling as everything in life right now feels like a horrible challenge, but I slept okay last night, and I'm going to bed early tonight, so that should help. Please be okay, everyone.
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Jun 24, 2020 03:15
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Hi, all. Since I started this thread and have a tiny amount of power over it, I wanted to post real quick about everything that's going on in the forums. For those of you who haven't heard: Lowtax has been accused of beating a woman. This is not the first time he's been in this situation, and there are very good reasons to take this accusation seriously. (If saying that publicly gets me banned, then whatever.) You can read the official statement and further details at the top of pretty much every forum, but the summary from staff is "we do not work for Lowtax and we care about these forums, we will continue to run them without his input." Obvo people are already making offsites, and that's to be expected. This whole thing is extremely gross and the first time I've been outright ashamed to be associated with Something Awful. With that being said, until outside sources force it to close, the mental health thread will continue. As you've probably noticed, I've taken a big step back to the point where I no longer consider this "my thread" (if it ever was) and only interact with it to course correct from reports when necessary. I've had to do this for my own sanity, because I have not been in a good place until recently, and I can't maintain the level of energy I've had in the past. I don't think any of us here are 100% in a good place, but it's been extra bad on my end. Thanks to truck for keeping an eye on things in my absence, and I still hope to be in from time to time. That's pretty much it. I wanted to say something about it since I'm an IK and the situation touches pretty much everyone in this thread, but especially those of us who have lived through abusive situations. I'm personally disgusted but am in the same place as the beginning of the year: I'm here until I'm banned, at which point I won't be back. If there's anything any of you need or want to say, please feel free to PM me (though not if it means buying plat!). I may not post much here anymore, but I'm still listening and want to care for people as much as my abilities allow.
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Jun 24, 2020 19:43
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Just in case SA suddenly vanishes into the ether, I just wanted to thank everyone in this thread for being so wonderful. I only posted here once or twice, but it was during a pretty rough patch (for me, probably a breeze by most people's standards) and your kind words helped me get through it. I'm personally doing much better now, I've found a combo of meds that keep my panic disorder pretty well suppressed, and I've actually felt pretty darn good the last two weeks, which isn't something I'm used to! I hope everyone in this thread can feel what I feel right now, the sudden realization that you feel upbeat and positive for the first time in a long time. You all deserve it!
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Jun 25, 2020 08:54
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| # ? May 23, 2024 13:32 |
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Since it hasn't been posted in this thread, please give breadnroses.net a look just in case SA disappears in a cloud of spite. It's a spin off that resulted from the fuckery in January, and it has apparently seen 4k new registrations in the last couple of days. It's  but they're waiving that for SA refugeesAccordion Man posted:Hey guys, been a while. Just posting to say if you still want to post about games on a forum instead of just Discords, an invitation has been extended for Bread and Roses. Left for it due to the Taxman's shenanigans six months ago from an invite here and all it needs is more people; a whole gaggle of goons have already been jumping ship for there right now. Games forum there could really use some fresh blood too. Don't have to be a screaming communist (Though why aren't you at this point? Tarnop has issued a correction as of 15:48 on Jun 25, 2020 |
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Jun 25, 2020 15:45
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) to join so long as you ain't a Nazi, transphobe, and the like. Not to mention we actually got Xenforo.There's a