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Funk In Shoe
Apr 20, 2008

Waiting in line, Mr. Haydon told me it is a wheel not meant for lovers but for infants, lifting people and letting them swing, putting the world on display from up high

Valleyant posted:

Did you see reene's announcement post, loving lmao

I did - did you see the weak sauce doublespeak reply Burt Sexual gave to this very question the first time he got asked in this thread? And did you see the screenshots of Burt Sexual actively banning and probating people for expressing concern about ladyambien losing access to a gofundme she needed to take care of her kid in a wome's shelter?

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hemoptysis
Jan 4, 2007

y-y-YAY
:ohdear:
youy seen burger dog now get ready for



also dont trust anything from kiwi farms are you stupid

Valleyant
Jul 23, 2007

That darn catte

cock hero flux posted:

she foolishly awakened lowtax whose drug-addled sleep-flailing sent her flying down the stairs directly into lowtax's artisanal doorknob collection, and then because she is evil and insane she used it as an opportunity to make up a series of cruel lies about this saintly paragon of virtue in order to ruin him when the reality is that his spine is too thoroughly cursed for him to harm anyone and that's why you should continue to pledge to the gaming garbage patreon

As a healthy 26 year old female, I

barbecue at the folks
Jul 20, 2007


remember remember the twentyfourth of june
lowtax beats women

Only registered members can see post attachments!

Comfy Fleece Sweater
Apr 2, 2013

You see, but you do not observe.

Telebite posted:

Reminder that Lowtax needs more surgery because more vertebrae in his spine are degenerating. I guess if he really beats women then everyone wants his spine to degenerate without surgery? I have no idea what to think lol I'm so conflicted.

Mangoeteen will give you the strength to beat anyone even if your spine is broken... it is known

Fansy
Feb 26, 2013

I GAVE LOWTAX COOKIE MONEY TO CHANGE YOUR STUPID AVATAR GO FUCK YOURSELF DUDE
Grimey Drawer
is it time for this community to die?

If not, the mods should help a transition and then step down.

Clawtopsy
Dec 17, 2009

What a fascinatingly unusual cock. Now, allow me to show you my collection...

Sergeant Slippyfist posted:

i cant

i need a moment here

i don't even, i can't begin to

like

its

someone help me i dont know where to start

i am at a loss for words

hot liquid poo poo splashing up and speckling my white bottom

a man dips his fingers in fetid rear end sweat and smears a line of it on my forehead.

"RAZOR" he murmurs

a cleansing dive into sparkling yellow piss waters, light at the top yet brown near the bottom. i plunge deep and feel the saltiness enter my pores.

a field of partially congealed cum on grass. before it continues to gel, i leap and splay myself out on the ground, nude. i wave my arms and legs, making the snape of an angel.

i am led down a darkened hallway and through a metal door that screams as it opens and closes. i sit down in an old wooden chair with a light above me and wait. soon he appears. helpers flank him, and then grip my face and hold my mouth open. the man leans forward, plugs one nostril, and blows the contents of his nasal cavity into my eager mouth.

because my face is strapped so tightly to the rear end of this man, the poo poo he pushes out is forced to go over, around, and under my eye sockets after they rapidly become full of feces. i grind my face a little, to enjoy the smooshing sensation.

my penis stings greatly from the regurgitated stomach acids, but my joy overpowers the negative sensation. the scent of heineken and sourness fills the air.

he is strapped down over a table, blindfolded and gagged. a courtesan hands me a cheese grater and motions me towards his waiting rear end. mounds upon mounds of swollen, pus filled acne await me on twin rounded fields of flesh. i drop to my knees and hold my mouth open so as to enjoy any incidental splashing, and then i begin working on him with the grater.

my eyes are irritated as endless flakes of dead skin float down into them, but the visine helps mitigate the worst of it. my erection grows ever harder as i watch the crusty foot directly above my face get worked over with the file. soon all of the callous will be broken up and spread over me.

the side rooms are filled with aged and diseased men of all walks of life. the only unifying factor among them is that they have all contracted the most recent strain of cold virus, and each cough from them produces a hefty amount of phlegm. upon entering, they crowd around me and hold me down onto the ground. my clothes are rapidly stripped away, and the process begins. the air is filled with a cacophony of horks and coughs, and i close my eyes. all across my body i can feel points of warmth as phlegm and bile are projected onto me.

a melange of feces and vomit make the floor slick and difficult to traverse but, then again, that's the point. around the room are men sitting on benches, and beside each of them is a small bucket full of nerf footballs. i enter the room and they begin hurling them at me. you are instructed to dodge to the best of your abilities, but are expected to fall into the frothy mixture on the floor in short order. upon falling, i purposefully roll around to slather as much of it onto my skin as possible.

the men on the top floor are chained to prevent their escape, and some are in fact strapped down so as to prevent any movement. all have leprosy and are in various stages of decay, and i am invited to insert my tongue into the gaping wound of a man not far from his final rest. it is hot and fetid, yet drier on the inside than i would have expected. i work some salvia into the gaping hole to enhance the experience.

"you may experience discomfort", the courtesan informs me. the pumping mechanism is now tightly strapped to my body, and the catheter has been violently shoved all the way in. some say it is a life changing experience to have the urine of another man forcibly pumped into your own bladder, and i eagerly look forward to seeing if this is true

i roll the dry balls of poo poo around in my mouth. these have been left to sit for a day, and even right after being produced they were quite dry. there is still some softness to them, some moisture within. i bite down, and the sensation of crumbling poo poo fills my mouth. i spit out the hard flecks of undigested matter and continue to chew.

in the mirror, i see that the veins in my neck are engorged as i try to push out any remaining feces. it is a thrill to know that this feces is not mine, and yet i am still passing it through my system. my throat is still quite irritated from the intubation process, and it is still bizarre feeling the hot lumps pass through said tube into my mouth, down my throat, and into my gut to be re-processed by my own intestines.

in the morning, i do not feel well. the exertions of the previous night and the inability of my body to handle so much foreign material has taken its toll. i try to liven myself up in the piss showers, and my spirits are lifted, but the nausea remains. an attendant brings me a smoothy for breakfast, and i hungrily sip from the straw. a strange flavor, but this trip is about new experiences. i ask the attendant what's in it, and he describes a fetid mixture of pus and cum. i smile as he leaves. "they think of everything", i muse.

today is the main event. my prostate will be forcibly manipulated until every last drop of semen is pumped out of my body and into an incision that the on-site physician has made in my right bicep. there is some swelling around the injection site, but i have been prescribed advil.

i have some time to spare, so i stroll over to the penetration room. from behind a two way mirror, i watch an army of men pump in and out of each other in a room that has long since been sealed shut. the only thing pumped in is oxygen. the men have been told that they must continue to gently caress and thrust or they will be deprived of that last comfort. no fighting is allowed, and the last man left alive will be free to go. a lie, of course. currently fifteen men are left, with perhaps a dozen corpses around them. they do not know or care if the people they continue to thrust in and out of are alive. some of the corpses have been mutilated quite badly, and have perhaps a litre of semen in their decaying stomachs.

blood is perhaps the most common lubricant used, and in fact has become some sort of currency. some men are lured into oral sex, only to be tricked by the performer as they bite down. blood will often burst from their members so forcefully, that the peformer is taken aback and blood gushes from their mouth, only to be wasted. perhaps one third of the blood is successfully saved for use.

one of the other penetration rooms has reached its conclusion, and i rush over to be the first in line. the corpses are removed one by one and laid down onto tables. a courtesan motions me over to the first one removed, and i sit on a small stool facing the bottom of said corpse. soon my head is pushed forward and strapped in place, my mouth encompassing the rear end in a top hat the corpse quite neatly. another courtesan brings a small footstool over to help him stand above the corpse.

"are you ready?" he asks.

i nod as best i can. he brings his foot down onto the stomach of the corpse, applies pressure, and the decayed insides begin to splay out of the rear end in a top hat and into me.

bits of bone from broken ribs migrated into this mixture of rotting matter, so i choke slightly as they cut the inside of my throat. this is considered a faux pas, and my exposed buttocks are viciously slashed with a razor wielded by the overseer. i cannot defend myself, as my head is still strapped to the rear end in a top hat of the corpse i was previously enjoying

blood trickles from the deep gashes on my buttocks, and several attendants and other guests rush over to suck as much of the precious liquid from me as they can. eventually a courtesan frees me from the corpse, and i stand. i stride out of the room quickly, as embarrassment has left me beet red. and it is almost time for my prostate-to-bicep procedure anyway. as i march to the appropriate location, my penis grows engorged with anticipation. i am propositioned for oral sex several times on my journey, but i know better - i don't need a burst cock this late in the game.

i lay down upon the cold steel table, and am strapped into position by an attendant. another attendant rigs up the prostate pump, and the seals around my bicep injection site are checked and rechecked. a switch is flipped, and the process begins. it is quite pleasurable amidst the pain, as my prostate is pounded by a mechanical device of which the workings i am not privy to. soon the pump begins to function, and i watch out of the corner of my eye as a goopy, milky white substance gushes towards my bicep. the feeling of the hot liquid cum pumping into my arm is incredible. i can feel the warmth spreading all over my muscle.

but something goes wrong - the pressure is too high, and the injection needle snaps off inside of my arm, the cum being pumped out spraying wildly in every direction. screams and shouts are heard. this is a disaster!

the pumping machine and the prostate mechanism have gone out of control, i writhe with white hot pain as my prostate is pounded violently beyond tolerable limits, and it somehow grows even worse as the organ is literally ripped apart inside of me, causing massive internal bleeding. the milky white goodness that was previously being pumped out of me grows red, deeply red, as it is replaced almost entirely by blood - that most precious of resources here at CES. instead of helping me in some way, shutting down the mechanism that is ripping my innards apart, the attendants rush over and fight one another for access to the tube that is spraying my blood all over.

cum oozes out of the injection site on by bicep. i lay in a pool of blood, and i suddenly realize poo poo as well. my bowels have released from all the internal turmoil in my body. my bladder is most likely draining, but i cannot tell now. everything is becoming a haze. my stomach is upset. i belch. the taste of pus.

perhaps i am going to die, but more importantly - my trip is ruined.

i wake up. it is dark. i am not dead, but perhaps i should be. i am back in my hotel room. my arm is bandaged, and i feel many more bandages down below. i do not know the full extent of the damage, but i am in great pain all over and it is hard to focus on anything. i turn my head slightly towards the bedside table. several bottles of antibiotics obscure the clock, but i know it is sometime during the night.

after several minutes of rest, i manage to reach over towards the pill bottles. i notice a note. i grasp it, and shakily bring it to my face. there is barely enough ambient light to see, but i focus as best i can as i fumble it open. a contact name, an email address, and a phone number. some scribbled text.

"Thank you for attending the RAZOR CES afterparty."

i close my eyes.

oh word?

SUNKOS
Jun 4, 2016


PHIZ KALIFA posted:

she is being pressured to recant and i and the other frontpage writers are attempting to make sure she's shielded from him.

I can't keep up with this thread but this confirms the supposed post about falling down stairs on her Facebook wasn't written by her? That's proven fake now and presumably he accessed her Facebook and posted it himself?

CharlestonJew
Jul 7, 2011

Illegal Hen

Sitting Here posted:

all these people heroically autobanning meanwhile the RAINN donation thread has...11 posts

you grandstanding cowards. no one gives a gently caress how you want to litigate a woman's suffering. Stop making this about your posting account and do something that actually helps someone jfc

you first

Valleyant
Jul 23, 2007

That darn catte
Waiting for NYC_Tatto to wake up from his nazi coma to ban us all

SHISHKABOB
Nov 30, 2012

Fun Shoe

large hands posted:

She landed on the 'tax man's sweaty toes

cab someone explain sweaty toes

cum
Sep 18, 2016

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

hemoptysis posted:

youy seen burger dog now get ready for



also dont trust anything from kiwi farms are you stupid

excellent cat

ImpAtom
May 24, 2007

hemoptysis posted:

youy seen burger dog now get ready for



also dont trust anything from kiwi farms are you stupid

I didn't post that because I trusted it. I posted it because even when it was posted originally people were going "uh that sounds fake" and now the exact same post with some changed details is appearing on a facebook which only makes it look more fake.

Plus, you know, we have people actually in contact who say she is being pressured into recanting.

wearing a lampshade
Mar 6, 2013

SUNKOS posted:

I can't keep up with this thread but this confirms the supposed post about falling down stairs on her Facebook wasn't written by her? That's proven fake now and presumably he accessed her Facebook and posted it himself?

all the replies to the post variate around "is he holding a gun to your head right now" and "did you get hacked" so yeah the general consensus is that its bullshit

Chido
Dec 7, 2003

Butterflies fluttering on my face!

paraphrasing what somebody said in Logan's post, but Lowtax seems to date women with issues like personality disorders... which makes it very convenient when you want people to believe you and not them: she's crazy and didn't take her meds and is drinking! You can't trust what she says I'm the victim here x 3,4, or 5 times?

How many of his exes have accused him of domestic abuse now? And how many times he's brought up their mental issues a sign they are lying and being the abusive ones instead?

barbecue at the folks
Jul 20, 2007


gay devil
Aug 20, 2009

this is the third loving time this has happened stop giving lowtax the benefit of the doubt

Solomonic
Jan 3, 2008

INCIPIT SANTA
Lmao yeah okay, it was "just a misunderstanding" for the third time, with the third person to make claims like this. Sounds legit.

batteries! posted:

Lowtax is a serial abuser and rapist who poo poo his pants in a Chik-fil-A at GenCon

under penalty of perjury, would you agree that we should repossess his GTR and/or spine

StrangersInTheNight
Dec 31, 2007
ABSOLUTE FUCKING GUDGEON

hemoptysis posted:

youy seen burger dog now get ready for


Rectal Death Adept
Jun 20, 2018

by Fluffdaddy

Augus posted:

dudes calm down it's just the same exact wacky misunderstanding involving the same exact person for the third time in a row nothing to see here

It's a relief to know it's the same kind of misunderstanding I've experienced in my life.

What I thought was abuse was a simple mistake. They were just stressed out / half asleep / not paying attention / drunk and simply moved their body in such a way as to accidentally exert force on me while shouting angrily about something unrelated to me. I was simply wrong and they are sorry for how i Interpreted things.

Thom12255 posted:

Didn't Logan say she left Lowtax's house? If she actually recanted then it'd be easy for them to prove it by posting a video of both of them together talking about it lol.

I don't think it matters how emphatically she swears it was all a misunderstanding when she was posting "laying on the ground while a grown man looms over me, now in a hotel" and the cops got involved. It's Abuse 101 that the victim is convinced Incident #432 with Woman #4 is another in a long line of serial misunderstandings from an endless line of women who refuse to just listen to the man and understand they aren't being abused.

Funk In Shoe
Apr 20, 2008

Waiting in line, Mr. Haydon told me it is a wheel not meant for lovers but for infants, lifting people and letting them swing, putting the world on display from up high

SUNKOS posted:

I can't keep up with this thread but this confirms the supposed post about falling down stairs on her Facebook wasn't written by her? That's proven fake now and presumably he accessed her Facebook and posted it himself?

If this is actual truth I - as a non US citizens with no means or intent of doing so personally - would think it would be really cool and good and funny for someone to actively track down and beat the living snot out of this man in real life for real.

Pontificating Ass
Aug 2, 2002

What Doth Life?
maybe it's finally time to register somethingISawful.com

ManiacClown
May 30, 2002

Gone, gone, O honky man,
And rise the M.C. Etrigan!

If he doesn't want SA/the forums I'll take it/them assuming it's not all in massive debt.

Comfy Fleece Sweater
Apr 2, 2013

You see, but you do not observe.

PHIZ KALIFA posted:

she is being pressured to recant and i and the other frontpage writers are attempting to make sure she's shielded from him.

At this point I will only believe a 360 video, to show nobody is pointing a gun behind the camera

Cocaine Bear
Nov 4, 2011

ACAB

3rd time's a charm!


(hopefully he ends up in jail this time!)

Do it ironically
Jul 13, 2010

by Pragmatica

John_A_Tallon posted:

Was that the woman he said kidnapped their daughter and was illegally in the country with an expired visa?

Yes

DelilahFlowers
Jan 10, 2020

Yo goatse is cool but can we not post "r****d" and "f****t" we are the coolposters who hate misogyny but also hate ableism and homophobia.

Valleyant
Jul 23, 2007

That darn catte

cum calamity posted:

this is the third loving time this has happened stop giving lowtax the benefit of the doubt

He also tried to have an ex deported, good guy this richard

Chris Pistols
Oct 20, 2008

Piss Crystals
Now I wonder if I'll EVER get my drawing of a spaceship

(Just retelling this joke for laughs, sorry if anyone's offended. Juno420@aol.com)

Famethrowa
Oct 5, 2012

pretty incredible that he is such a piece of poo poo he couldn't stop himself from abusing a third woman, even with the chance of his piggy bank of free money being taken away.

barbecue at the folks
Jul 20, 2007


Incitatus
Dec 16, 2005

The Meat Man was out of wings, Mr. William Ash More!:argh:
somethingslawful.com the SA/Doobie forum

Note Block
May 14, 2007

nothing could fit so perfectly inside




Fun Shoe
is anyone else really curious how good these goldbelly cookies are? 40 dollars for a pack of 6 cookies, these better be the best cookies I've ever loving had in my life

Zoobtro
Aug 22, 2003

Got miself a nice little earner, isn't it
are the kids ok? they seemed pretty chill & funny on stream, while lowtax was drunkenly shouting and smorky was there

giZm
Jul 7, 2003

Only the insane equates pain with success

yo just signed up where da abuse at?

Orange Fluffy Sheep
Jul 26, 2008

Bad EXP received

your posts keep fuckin me up because lowtax uses that av and I keep thinking the Hour of Reckoning is upon us

anyway can someone post the og krust image

Admiral Ray
May 17, 2014

Proud Musk and Dogecoin fanboy

cock hero flux posted:

she foolishly awakened lowtax whose drug-addled sleep-flailing sent her flying down the stairs directly into lowtax's artisanal doorknob collection, and then because she is evil and insane she used it as an opportunity to make up a series of cruel lies about this saintly paragon of virtue in order to ruin him when the reality is that his spine is too thoroughly cursed for him to harm anyone and that's why you should continue to pledge to the gaming garbage patreon

ah, i see. logan wasn't hit, it was just a lowtax-involved awakening

hemoptysis
Jan 4, 2007

y-y-YAY
:ohdear:

ImpAtom posted:

I didn't post that because I trusted it. I posted it because even when it was posted originally people were going "uh that sounds fake" and now the exact same post with some changed details is appearing on a facebook which only makes it look more fake.

Plus, you know, we have people actually in contact who say she is being pressured into recanting.

the "you" is more directe d to anyone reading this who doesnt know kf is untrustworthy. youre ok :sax:

cock hero flux
Apr 17, 2011



Chido posted:

paraphrasing what somebody said in Logan's post, but Lowtax seems to date women with issues like personality disorders... which makes it very convenient when you want people to believe you and not them: she's crazy and didn't take her meds and is drinking! You can't trust what she says I'm the victim here x 3,4, or 5 times?

How many of his exes have accused him of domestic abuse now? And how many times he's brought up their mental issues a sign they are lying and being the abusive ones instead?

it's been the same pattern pretty much every time and i don't doubt for a second that he deliberately preys on women who have pre-existing issues because it makes it so much easier to manipulate them and for you to denounce them as unstable when they finally speak out

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JakeP
Apr 27, 2003

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
Lipstick Apathy

SHISHKABOB posted:

cab someone explain sweaty toes

its lowtax's excuse for how he accidently backhanded Logan and knocked her to the ground.

He was sleeping, and his toes were sweaty and he slipped on his sweaty toes.

This is what she posted in her first post excusing the first abuse incident.

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