funny politics shit you remember: The Maltese Failson

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > C-SPAM > funny politics shit you remember: The Maltese Failson

Chuka Umana: Apr 30, 2019; by sebmojo

3D Megadoodoo posted:

He would've won in a modern democracy with a multi-party system.

So yeah he was never going to even win the nomination and it's really weird that people thought he might, let alone would.

If it was a multi party system there would already be a progressive/social democratic party infrastructure (ie. what's essentially consolidated into the congressional progressive caucus) in place so yea he could've won then.

# ? Jul 11, 2020 23:54

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# ? May 25, 2024 11:26

One More Fat Nerd: Apr 13, 2007; Mama’s Lil’ Louie; Nap Ghost

GalacticAcid posted:

I don’t remember this part

Yeah, Bernie was banking on the DNC being as ineffectual as the RNC was in 2016, and they weren't.

The "funny" politics poo poo i remember was a few weeks after Super Tuesday when there were multiple reports of bad blood inside the Bernie campaign between Nina Turner and others because campaign leadership apparently had zero plans on how to win over black dem voters specifically. Which yeah, in hindsight, seems a bit obvious.

Looking forward to hopefully getting a chance to vote Turner in 2024. Either in the primary, or the general.

# ? Jul 12, 2020 01:06

Animal-Mother: Feb 14, 2012; RABBIT RABBIT
RABBIT RABBIT

That old man who was dying and said, "drat, I won't get to read the Mueller report."

# ? Jul 12, 2020 04:20

ikanreed: Sep 25, 2009; I honestly I have no idea who cannibal[SIC] is and I do not know why I should know.

syq dude, just syq!

Animal-Mother posted:

That old man who was dying and said, "drat, I won't get to read the Mueller report."

Dying as he libbed

# ? Jul 12, 2020 05:04

GalacticAcid: Apr 8, 2013; NEW YORK VALUES

ikanreed posted:

Dying as he libbed

# ? Jul 12, 2020 05:47

PsychedelicWarlord: Sep 8, 2016

uber_stoat posted:

his nomme de posting was "Psychedelic Warlord."

# ? Jul 12, 2020 06:43

AARP LARPer: Feb 19, 2005; THE DARK SIDE OF SCIENCE BREEDS A WEAPON OF WAR; Buglord

ikanreed posted:

Dying as he libbed

# ? Jul 12, 2020 06:46

Stunning Honky: Sep 7, 2004; " . . . "

ikanreed posted:

Dying as he libbed

# ? Jul 12, 2020 07:22

Stunning Honky: Sep 7, 2004; " . . . "

Klob waiting juuuuust until Pete dropped out to do so herself because she hated his guts

# ? Jul 12, 2020 07:23

Inceltown: Aug 6, 2019

In honour of Farage becoming a Fox analcyst, yes you heard me right - see note, I present this.

note:

# ? Jul 12, 2020 07:25

Stunning Honky: Sep 7, 2004; " . . . "

lol I have what I consider a good friend who was early in on Butt and like I'll have him over for BBQ but will never in my life understand him being a paid campaigner

# ? Jul 12, 2020 07:25

Spergin Morlock: Aug 8, 2009

ikanreed posted:

Dying as he libbed

# ? Jul 12, 2020 08:21

Milo and POTUS: Sep 3, 2017; I will not shut up about the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers. I talk about them all the time and work them into every conversation I have. I built a shrine in my room for the yellow one who died because sadly no one noticed because she died around 9/11. Wanna see it?

Something that read to the effect of (paraphrasing): The soviet union turned thousands of women from prostitutes to doctors, scientists and engineers

# ? Jul 12, 2020 11:34

Big Dick Cheney: Mar 30, 2007

Inceltown posted:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S02BHmWPZNs

# ? Jul 12, 2020 11:41

An insane mind: Aug 11, 2018

Milo and POTUS posted:

Something that read to the effect of (paraphrasing): The soviet union turned thousands of women from prostitutes to doctors, scientists and engineers

They get more bang for their buck now.

# ? Jul 12, 2020 12:35

Cockblocktopus: Apr 18, 2009; Since the beginning of time, man has yearned to destroy the sun.

One More Fat Nerd posted:

Yeah, Bernie was banking on the DNC being as ineffectual as the RNC was in 2016, and they weren't.

The "funny" politics poo poo i remember was a few weeks after Super Tuesday when there were multiple reports of bad blood inside the Bernie campaign between Nina Turner and others because campaign leadership apparently had zero plans on how to win over black dem voters specifically. Which yeah, in hindsight, seems a bit obvious.

Looking forward to hopefully getting a chance to vote Turner in 2024. Either in the primary, or the general.

cant wait for Bernie's 2024 campaign

# ? Jul 12, 2020 14:17

ikanreed: Sep 25, 2009; I honestly I have no idea who cannibal[SIC] is and I do not know why I should know.

syq dude, just syq!

Cockblocktopus posted:

cant wait for marrianne's 2024 campaign

# ? Jul 12, 2020 14:21

Cockblocktopus: Apr 18, 2009; Since the beginning of time, man has yearned to destroy the sun.

girlfriend, you are so on.

# ? Jul 12, 2020 14:51

vyelkin: Jan 2, 2011

Milo and POTUS posted:

Something that read to the effect of (paraphrasing): The soviet union turned thousands of women from prostitutes to doctors, scientists and engineers

The Economist:

quote:

Science is still a man�s world. Since 1903, when Marie Curie first won the Nobel Prize, almost 600 blokes but only 19 women have taken home the coveted award in physics, chemistry or medicine. In the realms of more ordinary talent, just 28% of the world�s researchers are women. Even in the eu, where the sexes are more equal than in other parts of the world, a mere two-fifths of scientists and engineers are women. In Germany and Finland, it is less than one in three.

Eastern Europe bucks the global trend, according to a recent report from Leiden University in the Netherlands. In Lithuania, 57% of scientists and engineers are women. Bulgaria and Latvia follow close behind, at 52%. Universities in Poland and Serbia were ranked among the best in the world for sexual equality in research publications. South-east Europe is roughly at parity: 49% of scientific researchers in the region are women. Some of this is a legacy of Soviet times, when communist regimes pressed both men and women into scientific careers and did not always give them a choice about it. The coercion has gone, but the habit of women working in labs has remained.

https://www.economist.com/europe/2019/07/18/why-half-the-scientists-in-some-eastern-european-countries-are-women

Those dastardly Soviets, coercing women into... becoming highly-educated successful scientists!

# ? Jul 12, 2020 15:08

Stunning Honky: Sep 7, 2004; " . . . "

hillary clinton's bottle of hot sauce

# ? Jul 12, 2020 15:21

Ruffian Price: Sep 17, 2016

Stunning Honky posted:

hillary clinton's bottle of hot sauce

it was surreal watching people just not believe it. standard rich person bullshit like mitt romney's birthday cakes and you had takes like "she's lying to be more relatable", loving what?

# ? Jul 12, 2020 15:36

Action Jacktion: Jun 3, 2003

One More Fat Nerd posted:

Looking forward to hopefully getting a chance to vote Turner in 2024. Either in the primary, or the general.

Looking forward to all the "Did I mention I knew Turner couldn't win? :smug:

" in C-Spam 2024.

# ? Jul 12, 2020 16:06

Stunning Honky: Sep 7, 2004; " . . . "

Ruffian Price posted:

it was surreal watching people just not believe it. standard rich person bullshit like mitt romney's birthday cakes and you had takes like "she's lying to be more relatable", loving what?

it seemed to me the least calculated thing of the campaign. there was probably a flask of potato vodka in there too but you can't just spout that out

# ? Jul 12, 2020 16:27

DMCrimson: Jan 2, 2005; Nap Ghost

Stunning Honky posted:

hillary clinton's bottle of hot sauce

One day I'm going to make a database of failed "I swear I'm relatable to you" attempts, they're the best.

Mark Zuckerburg talks to farmers while strategically standing closer to the camera
Paul Ryan and family crashes food kitchen, ruins everything
Every primary candidate at the Iowa State Fair
Ted Cruz buys 100 cans of soup in one trip following his honeymoon

DMCrimson has issued a correction as of 17:00 on Jul 12, 2020

# ? Jul 12, 2020 16:56

FORUMS USER 1135: Jan 14, 2004

Obama pretending to drink tap water

# ? Jul 12, 2020 16:59

Flavius Aetass: Mar 30, 2011

ikanreed posted:

Dying as he libbed

legit laughing fit over here

# ? Jul 12, 2020 17:06

Mantis42: Jul 26, 2010

It was emergency adrenochrome disguised as hot sauce.

# ? Jul 12, 2020 17:15

El_Elegante: Jul 3, 2004; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS; Biscuit Hider

DMCrimson posted:

One day I'm going to make a database of failed "I swear I'm relatable to you" attempts, they're the best.

Mark Zuckerburg talks to farmers while strategically standing closer to the camera

Paul Ryan and family crashes food kitchen, ruins everything

Every primary candidate at the Iowa State Fair

Ted Cruz buys 100 cans of soup in one trip following his honeymoon

mitt romney hot dog quote

# ? Jul 12, 2020 17:17

vyelkin: Jan 2, 2011

DMCrimson posted:

One day I'm going to make a database of failed "I swear I'm relatable to you" attempts, they're the best.

Mark Zuckerburg talks to farmers while strategically standing closer to the camera

Paul Ryan and family crashes food kitchen, ruins everything

Every primary candidate at the Iowa State Fair

Ted Cruz buys 100 cans of soup in one trip following his honeymoon

Mark Zuckerberg making and enthusiastically chomping away on dry toast

# ? Jul 12, 2020 18:01

GalacticAcid: Apr 8, 2013; NEW YORK VALUES

smokin these meats

# ? Jul 12, 2020 18:14

taqueso: Mar 8, 2004

DMCrimson posted:

Ted Cruz buys 100 cans of soup in one trip following his honeymoon

Ted Cruz is p much the most authentic politician, he probably still buys 100 cans of soup

# ? Jul 12, 2020 18:32

Stunning Honky: Sep 7, 2004; " . . . "

Ted Cruz kissing a man and punching his wife

# ? Jul 12, 2020 18:33

Stunning Honky: Sep 7, 2004; " . . . "

ted cruz phone banking for trump

# ? Jul 12, 2020 18:34

Stunning Honky: Sep 7, 2004; " . . . "

i hate that i never got a phone call, and never will, from ted cruz. i would have that dude as long as i possibly could hemming and hawing about voting for trump

# ? Jul 12, 2020 18:36