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Elephunk
Dec 6, 2007



BrianBoitano posted:

Easiest is parchment on a cutting board, no oil. Stretch it with your hands, giving it a couple of minutes break if it doesn't seem to want to stretch. Unless you have tons of sauce, no raised lip needed.

Preheat oven as hot as it goes* for at least an hour.

If you have a 12" cast iron, wipe it dry with a paper towel and preheat it in the oven the whole hour and transfer parchment into that, no need to remove the dough. If no large cast iron, a baking sheet is fine, though the temperatures might warp it so be aware. Best is a baking steel or stone.

If you're at 550°F, a pizza takes about 7 minutes or more based on how thick the crust is. Enjoy, and careful of the edge of the hot oven door!

*the hottest an oven can go is actually the oven clean cycle, but you can't use this without a lot of prep and caution. When I was in college, I remember reading an article about this, but forgot the prep note of "cut off the temperature-controlled safety latch". Without that, the oven locked my pizza inside. We unplugged it before it turned entirely to carbon, but had to wait an hour for it to drop in temperature enough to open :v:

It went pretty well! I had "enough dough for two 10" diameter pizzas" and the best pan I had was a big, quality restaraunt that was probably 18x24".''

Stretching dough for pizza is frustrating; it rose in the fridge overnight and then covered on the kitchen table for two hours before I tried to work with it. I thought I would have leftover dough but I wound up using it all to fill out the sheet pan (and patched some holes, etc.).

Didn't have parchment paper so it was just the thick sheet pan and a liberal olive oil treatment before the dough went on. No pre-heat on the pan but the oven was about as hot as we could get it. This is the worst oven I've ever rented though, it goes to "500" but I don't believe it really gets that hot.

Bottom didn't have enough color but it was quite edible for a first-ever pizza attempt. Pre-heating a better pan and the parchment paper will probably help get color on the bottom. Didn't expect working the dough to be that frustrating, I knew I wasn't gonna be tossing it in the air like a cartoon but it took a good 30 minutes to make that rectangle of dough.

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mediaphage
Mar 22, 2007

Excuse me, pardon me, sheer perfection coming through

Elephunk posted:

It went pretty well! I had "enough dough for two 10" diameter pizzas" and the best pan I had was a big, quality restaraunt that was probably 18x24".''

Stretching dough for pizza is frustrating; it rose in the fridge overnight and then covered on the kitchen table for two hours before I tried to work with it. I thought I would have leftover dough but I wound up using it all to fill out the sheet pan (and patched some holes, etc.).

Didn't have parchment paper so it was just the thick sheet pan and a liberal olive oil treatment before the dough went on. No pre-heat on the pan but the oven was about as hot as we could get it. This is the worst oven I've ever rented though, it goes to "500" but I don't believe it really gets that hot.

Bottom didn't have enough color but it was quite edible for a first-ever pizza attempt. Pre-heating a better pan and the parchment paper will probably help get color on the bottom. Didn't expect working the dough to be that frustrating, I knew I wasn't gonna be tossing it in the air like a cartoon but it took a good 30 minutes to make that rectangle of dough.

sounds like it went pretty well just the same! i guess you could do some side by sides but I’m a little skeptical that pre-heating a thin sheet pan is really going to do a whole lot. if you could immediately get the dough on and back in the oven, like all within 30 seconds, it might help a little. also, obviously, thinner doughs and fewer toppings will cook sooner.

if the dough is feeling tight, just cover it and walk away for 15 minutes, then come back to prep. additionally, you can add a little ascorbic acid and it makes dough really easy to roll out. it’s often pre-added to some yeast packets, if you don’t want to buy a bottle.

Elephunk
Dec 6, 2007



mediaphage posted:

sounds like it went pretty well just the same! i guess you could do some side by sides but I’m a little skeptical that pre-heating a thin sheet pan is really going to do a whole lot. if you could immediately get the dough on and back in the oven, like all within 30 seconds, it might help a little. also, obviously, thinner doughs and fewer toppings will cook sooner.

if the dough is feeling tight, just cover it and walk away for 15 minutes, then come back to prep. additionally, you can add a little ascorbic acid and it makes dough really easy to roll out. it’s often pre-added to some yeast packets, if you don’t want to buy a bottle.

It's a pretty thick restaraunt quality steel sheet. I already turned it a very different color following Ina Garten's roast chicken recipe so I'm not scared of nuking it. I would be more worried about safely getting the pizza/parchment onto the super hot pan without a burn.

mediaphage
Mar 22, 2007

Excuse me, pardon me, sheer perfection coming through

Elephunk posted:

It's a pretty thick restaraunt quality steel sheet. I already turned it a very different color following Ina Garten's roast chicken recipe so I'm not scared of nuking it. I would be more worried about safely getting the pizza/parchment onto the super hot pan without a burn.

if you don't have a peel, use the back of another sheet pan, if you have it, to slide the pizza off. since you'll have some time, i recommend cutting the parchment away past a half inch or so of the dough. it can burn and while i wouldn't say it's really a fire hazard, it can be annoying since it disintegrates if you look at it in a stern fashion

Rythe
Jan 21, 2011

As you get more familiar with cooking pizza you can use a grill if you have one. This get seriously hot and make for a great pizza oven.

Cyril Sneer
Aug 8, 2004

Life would be simple in the forest except for Cyril Sneer. And his life would be simple except for The Raccoons.
I have no idea where to ask this, so I'll try asking here: I legitimately enjoy fortune cookies as a cookie. They're nice and light, and have just the right amount of crunch and sweetness. Does anyone know where to get bulk, unwrapped fortune cookies? I say unwrapped because I know you can get packs of them individually wrapped but that's kind of stupid/wasteful. Alternatively, is there an equivalent cookie/biscuit that is effectively the same recipe, minus the fortune cookie gimmick?

BrianBoitano
Nov 15, 2006

this is fine



I'd email/tweet at some manufacturers. Googling a bit shows nada to buy unwrapped. Seems easy enough to try baking yourself though!

This might scratch that itch, texture-wise if not flavor-wise. Bonus that sesame oil is in fortune cookies and these have sesame seeds.

I. M. Gei
Jun 26, 2005

CHIEFS

BITCH



Is DoorDash an okay place to work for as a driver man?

I need to put together some cash for a major purchase.

Casu Marzu
Oct 20, 2008

I. M. Gei posted:

Is DoorDash an okay place to work for as a driver man?

I need to put together some cash for a major purchase.

lol they're all trash

Mercedes Colomar
Nov 1, 2008

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

I. M. Gei posted:

Is DoorDash an okay place to work for as a driver man?

I need to put together some cash for a major purchase.

I can ask my buddy who drives for them. But the gist I've heard is "lol no."

e - He is also very practical about it.

"Depends on the area you deliver to I guess But you don't deal with cash so that's a plus.

Get a mileage tracking app like Everlance so you can claim mileage for your taxes the following year. Get a bigger delivery bag, the one DoorDash gives you is relatively small.

Sometimes when they implement really good incentives or it gets really busy the delivery app crashes, they don't invest much in infrastructure. I really have no major complaints about it. I drive around listening to music and talking to friends all day on my phone. As long as you don't eat or steal peoples' food things are generally fine."

Mercedes Colomar fucked around with this message at 21:02 on Aug 7, 2020

I. M. Gei
Jun 26, 2005

CHIEFS

BITCH



Casu Marzu posted:

lol they're all trash

Yea I figured as much. I worked Instacart for a year and that poo poo was HORRIBLE.

I’m really wondering how trash DD is and why, so I have an idea of what to expect. Also how trash they are compated to other gig-type companies.

Manuel Calavera posted:

I can ask my buddy who drives for them. But the gist I've heard is "lol no."

e - He is also very practical about it.

"Depends on the area you deliver to I guess But you don't deal with cash so that's a plus.

Get a mileage tracking app like Everlance so you can claim mileage for your taxes the following year. Get a bigger delivery bag, the one DoorDash gives you is relatively small.

Sometimes when they implement really good incentives or it gets really busy the delivery app crashes, they don't invest much in infrastructure. I really have no major complaints about it. I drive around listening to music and talking to friends all day on my phone. As long as you don't eat or steal peoples' food things are generally fine."

That doesn’t sound too bad. No worse than Instacart at least.

Sounds like something I can survive doing for a few months, until I have enough money to afford the stuff I need to buy.

Eat This Glob
Jan 14, 2008

God is dead. God remains dead. And we have killed him. Who will wipe this blood off us? What festivals of atonement, what sacred games shall we need to invent?

I want to say it is door dash who has you put your tip in when you order, but you can change it when it is delivered. Like, if you saw that I put in a $10 tip on a $30 order for you to bring me my Chinese food order a mile away, I could change it to 50 cents after you showed up. I've used them a bit during covid, and you bet your rear end i don't reduce my 30% gratuity or whatever. gently caress that poo poo. Hopefully that has changed

Hutla
Jun 5, 2004

It's mechanical

Elephunk posted:

It's a pretty thick restaraunt quality steel sheet. I already turned it a very different color following Ina Garten's roast chicken recipe so I'm not scared of nuking it. I would be more worried about safely getting the pizza/parchment onto the super hot pan without a burn.

Don’t bother preheating the pan, you will both drop all your pizza toppings trying to get it in there and burn yourself in the process. Just set it on the floor of the oven for the first couple minutes.

I. M. Gei
Jun 26, 2005

CHIEFS

BITCH



Well DoorDash isn’t hiring in my area right now, but they have me on a waitlist for when they have an opening.

So I put in an application for a place called Waitr instead. Same basic idea as DoorDash, but I think it’s a smaller company in fewer cities. They’re reviewing my “profile” now and should get back to me sometime next week.

Have any of y’all ever heard of Waitr, or do you know anyone who’s worked for them? What are they like to work for? Any better/worse than DoorDash?

mediaphage
Mar 22, 2007

Excuse me, pardon me, sheer perfection coming through

Cyril Sneer posted:

I have no idea where to ask this, so I'll try asking here: I legitimately enjoy fortune cookies as a cookie. They're nice and light, and have just the right amount of crunch and sweetness. Does anyone know where to get bulk, unwrapped fortune cookies? I say unwrapped because I know you can get packs of them individually wrapped but that's kind of stupid/wasteful. Alternatively, is there an equivalent cookie/biscuit that is effectively the same recipe, minus the fortune cookie gimmick?

you don’t want to get them unwrapped. they will rapidly absorb water, leaving them chewy instead of crunchy. just accept this as a cost of doing business; in the grand scheme of things this is not so bad.

that said they are available in bulk both wrapped and unwrapped in my experience from supply companies.

SubG
Aug 19, 2004

It's a hard world for little things.

Cyril Sneer posted:

I have no idea where to ask this, so I'll try asking here: I legitimately enjoy fortune cookies as a cookie. They're nice and light, and have just the right amount of crunch and sweetness. Does anyone know where to get bulk, unwrapped fortune cookies? I say unwrapped because I know you can get packs of them individually wrapped but that's kind of stupid/wasteful. Alternatively, is there an equivalent cookie/biscuit that is effectively the same recipe, minus the fortune cookie gimmick?
Golden Gate Fortune Cookies sells bags of flat fortune cookies (not my photo):



I don't know anywhere where you can buy 'em online, though. So that's not particularly helpful. I've seen similar things occasionally in grocery store bakeries and places like that.

There was also a cookie made by I think Nabisco years ago that was basically just a flat, round fortune cookie, lightly browned around the edges. No idea what they were called or if they're still made, but it might jog someone else's memory.

Mr. Wiggles
Dec 1, 2003

We are all drinking from the highball glass of ideology.
Vanilla wafers?

SubG
Aug 19, 2004

It's a hard world for little things.

Mr. Wiggles posted:

Vanilla wafers?
No, they came in a flat cardboard box, kinda shaped like a cigar box, wrapped in tacky gold paper. You opened the top, and there were three rows of cookies in one of those blown plastic cookie trays.

edit: a couple minutes of image searching reveals that they were called Brown Edge Wafers:

Mr. Wiggles
Dec 1, 2003

We are all drinking from the highball glass of ideology.
I would eat those cookies.

Croatoan
Jun 24, 2005

I am inevitable.
ROBBLE GROBBLE
IDK man, they're at least 24 years old since they were discontinued in '96. Probably wouldn't be all that good.

excellent bird guy
Jan 1, 2020

by Cyrano4747
I wish there were a 24 hour grocery store in this town. I like to walk around the store at 3 AM when nobody is there, I find it relaxing :cheerdoge:

Elizabethan Error
May 18, 2006

Eat This Glob posted:

Hopefully that has changed
https://i.imgur.com/sOIJDGo.mp4

I. M. Gei posted:

Well DoorDash isn’t hiring in my area right now, but they have me on a waitlist for when they have an opening.

So I put in an application for a place called Waitr instead. Same basic idea as DoorDash, but I think it’s a smaller company in fewer cities. They’re reviewing my “profile” now and should get back to me sometime next week.

Have any of y’all ever heard of Waitr, or do you know anyone who’s worked for them? What are they like to work for? Any better/worse than DoorDash?
waitr being a smaller company means it's likely gonna be as poo poo as doordash but with tighter margins or not as much presence(unless they've an angel investor which is unlikely)

VelociBacon
Dec 8, 2009

excellent bird guy posted:

I wish there were a 24 hour grocery store in this town. I like to walk around the store at 3 AM when nobody is there, I find it relaxing :cheerdoge:

Same, just grabbing poo poo and putting it back facing the wrong way and sneezing everywhere

TV Zombie
Sep 6, 2011

Burying all the trauma from past nights
Burying my anger in the past

Tried making a juicy lucy by using pork cutlets and frying and the results were so dry for the first time.

Also looking for good recipes for Vienna sausages since we bought it in surplus by accident.

mediaphage
Mar 22, 2007

Excuse me, pardon me, sheer perfection coming through

TV Zombie posted:

good recipes for Vienna sausages.

hooo. not my thing.

you could spread them on toast with some diced cooked/raw onion. i'm not sure about recipes, really, they're more of a ready-to-eat thing. i bet you could use them as the base of a pate, maybe, too. probably a good breakfast food served in a full breakfast sense.

cut in half, breaded, and deep fried?

Kaiser Schnitzel
Mar 29, 2006

Schnitzel mit uns


TV Zombie posted:

Tried making a juicy lucy by using pork cutlets and frying and the results were so dry for the first time.

Also looking for good recipes for Vienna sausages since we bought it in surplus by accident.

Take out of can, put on saltines and eat? Best with an RC Cola and moon pie for dessert.

Maybe put them in some beans or something?

excellent bird guy
Jan 1, 2020

by Cyrano4747

Hey check this out. I used to and still am a 90s jrpg nerd. The Earthbound cookbook is on sale. I'd love to finally make that Strawberry Tofu that is Itoi's favorite.

Mercedes Colomar
Nov 1, 2008

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
I'm one of the backers of that! I backed at the "two copies plus get drawn in pixels" tier. Strawberry Tofu isn't in the book. But there is rock candy, magic pudding, truffles, tart or cake, the peanut cheese bar, and a lot of other savory recipes.

Suspect Bucket
Jan 15, 2012

SHRIMPDOR WAS A MAN
I mean, HE WAS A SHRIMP MAN
er, maybe also A DRAGON
or possibly
A MINOR LEAGUE BASEBALL TEAM
BUT HE WAS STILL
SHRIMPDOR
Did you know that if you cook eggs with red cabbage you get the BEST GREEN COLOR EVER



Ate them in a box with a fox, as tradition demands.

Would have been amazing with a ham steak or something. I'll have to revisit this.

excellent bird guy
Jan 1, 2020

by Cyrano4747

Manuel Calavera posted:

I'm one of the backers of that! I backed at the "two copies plus get drawn in pixels" tier. Strawberry Tofu isn't in the book. But there is rock candy, magic pudding, truffles, tart or cake, the peanut cheese bar, and a lot of other savory recipes.

:cheerdoge: I saw a little preview for the trout flavored yogurt

SweetBro
May 12, 2014

Did you read that sister?
Yes, truly a shitposter's post. I read it, Rem.
Considering getting into making ice cream. Is it worth it to invest in one of those $300 high tech churners or are like $80 variants good enough?

Thumposaurus
Jul 24, 2007

Get one that has its own compressor so you don't have to put the bowl in the freezer.
They never stay cold enough to properly churn ice cream.
I got mine by watching the shop goodwill auctions site like a hawk until I got one at a price I could live with.

excellent bird guy
Jan 1, 2020

by Cyrano4747
Can you make ice cream/gelato/whatever without sugar? Sugar bad. I'd like get pure leaf stevia and try to blend it into a puree or something off the wall like that if I needed sweet. Or go full nutso and use ginger, make it a little hot and tart instead of sweet.

Carillon
May 9, 2014






I have a compressor model, the one thing is to let it run a bit before adding the cream mixture as you want the canister pre cooled.

BrianBoitano
Nov 15, 2006

this is fine



excellent bird guy posted:

Can you make ice cream/gelato/whatever without sugar? Sugar bad. I'd like get pure leaf stevia and try to blend it into a puree or something off the wall like that if I needed sweet. Or go full nutso and use ginger, make it a little hot and tart instead of sweet.

Just like with GF baking, your best bet is to start with a recipe that's been designed around the specific ingredients you're using. So if you already have stevia, find a recipe that calls for it, don't try to sub it in a Splenda recipe.

Alternatively, if you can't find a trustworthy recipe source, you can look for a low sugar / sugar free mousse recipe and freeze that, to get a sort of semifreddo.

Thumposaurus
Jul 24, 2007

Sugar isn't only a sweetener in ice creams and sorbets it also lowers the freezing point which helps them from freezing too hard so you have a nice creamy scoopable product instead of something hard as a rock.

Fruit also has natural sugar if you're trying to make a consistent sorbet from batch to batch the only way to know for sure it's where you want it to be is to measure the brix or sugar content using a refractometer that's not really practical for home use.

Best sorbet tip is start with the best fruit you can get. You can add stabilizers too like egg whites, agar agar, xantham gum, etc... they all have their pluses and minuses as well.

The good thing about sorbets is if it is too hard or icy or you don't like the texture for whatever reason you can let it melt down adjust it and refreeze it. Ice creams it's harder to adjust like that since the action of churning in the freezer can cause it to "split" or all the fat separates out of the cream like making butter.

TLDR: Start with a good base recipe. Adjust flavor by tasting before freezing(remember freezing dulls taste make your base taste stronger)

bob dobbs is dead
Oct 8, 2017

I love peeps
Nap Ghost
the whole gamut of additives and poo poo works really well in many cases and the recent spate of halo top and halo top clones were originally made possible by sophisticated use of the additives and poo poo. if you want halo top tho, prolly better off going and buying it

Lurdiak
Feb 26, 2006

I believe in a universe that doesn't care, and people that do.


I made a video tribute to one of my favorite unhealthy bar foods.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-h1H9lMVkoM

The Midniter
Jul 9, 2001

excellent bird guy posted:

Can you make ice cream/gelato/whatever without sugar? Sugar bad. I'd like get pure leaf stevia and try to blend it into a puree or something off the wall like that if I needed sweet. Or go full nutso and use ginger, make it a little hot and tart instead of sweet.

You can make ice cream without sugar. Instead of sugar, substitute ground beef, and instead of milk and/or cream, sub a potato roll. Throw a slice of cheese on there and you've got the best ice cream you've ever had.

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mediaphage
Mar 22, 2007

Excuse me, pardon me, sheer perfection coming through

Thumposaurus posted:

Get one that has its own compressor so you don't have to put the bowl in the freezer.
They never stay cold enough to properly churn ice cream.
I got mine by watching the shop goodwill auctions site like a hawk until I got one at a price I could live with.



i'm sorry you have had troubles with them in the past, but this is completely wrong. the freezer inserts - assuming you keep your freezer at ~ -20/-4 - do an absolutely superb job with making ice cream, often surpassing the compressor machines. if you're quick, you can even do two batches, but that's pushing it. the singular downside is the freezing ahead, which puts a crimp on making multiple batches in one day (you can buy more bowls, though).

excellent bird guy posted:

Can you make ice cream/gelato/whatever without sugar? Sugar bad. I'd like get pure leaf stevia and try to blend it into a puree or something off the wall like that if I needed sweet. Or go full nutso and use ginger, make it a little hot and tart instead of sweet.

yes. sugar, as mentioned, accomplishes a few things in ice cream: it sweetens, it adds to the texture, and it lowers the freezing point of your base. if you're going to replace the sugar, you need to figure out how to make up for the lack of all of those things. but that's easier to do these days, thanks to the power of modern chemistry.

you're going to want to use a blend of sweeteners to replace the sugar. get your hands on erythritol (if you use 100% erythritol, your ice cream will be rock hard), polydextrose, allulose, and liquid sucralose, monkfruit, or stevia. Erythritol, with its small molecule, is great at freezing point depression, while polydextrose (bulk, texture, no sweetness), and allulose (bulk, texture, sweetness) also work to replace the physical effects of sugar and preventing the recrystallization of erythritol. Those three, together, should add up to the same volumetric amount of sugar in your ice cream base (for the record, i like less sweet ice creams, so my bases are always 4:2:1 milk:cream:sugar before any additives). generally the erythritol goes in at 1:2 or 1:3 vs the rest of the granular/powdered sweeteners.

none of them are as sweet as sugar, though, so you'll use the liquid super sweeteners to dial in the actual flavour sweetness that you prefer in your ice creams (remembering that cold inhibits flavour release and things will taste less sweet when cold).

after that you can proceed as normal. i like using the fairlife coke milk because it's 6g of sugar for a cup, making the whole base very low. you can add small amounts of gums or stabilizers (including yolks, if thats not an issue) with a negligible effect on the carb count. if everything's good but it's still a little bit too hard, a tablespoon or two of a neutral, high-proof spirit (such as vodka) will serve admirably.

mediaphage fucked around with this message at 15:14 on Aug 15, 2020

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