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Xenocides posted:I really wonder about the player who was Riverwind in the original campaign. His schtick is saying virtually nothing and being completely forgettable. Maybe he was min-maxed for combat? Maybe he was min-maxed for being in these novels [an air horn sounds, though it is unwarranted]
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Aug 28, 2020 00:35
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Prince Reggie K posted:I know this is an old thing to quote but that's basically the plot of Jane Yolen's Pit Dragon books. ( The planet is called AustarIV) I read those at like age 7 or 8 and barely remember a bunch of cringey stuff that maybe others can verify or not. I mean, if it was a prison colony for the worlds perverts then none of that is surprising. Even the dragon vagina thing, have you BEEN to furaffinity?
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Aug 28, 2020 00:58
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Nigmaetcetera posted:Probably because they’re horrible little shits. They also wear man buns, which is also awful.
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Aug 28, 2020 01:04
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My problem with Dragonlance was that my first exposure to it was in a massive annotated book that was the first three books in one binding, and every page had lots of notes from the authors about why they did stuff and what the gaming backstory was of most of it. It kicked rear end hearing all these behind the scenes details, and made me love the books. They probably don't hold up anymore at all but that's okay. This doesn't sound like a problem, but it's just that I know they're bad and probably suck but whatev.
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Aug 28, 2020 01:06
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My sister read a bunch of the Dragonlance books, when she went from her Horse Girl to her Dragon Girl phase. I picked up one once; all I recall is it seemed like the characters were always name-checking a bunch of other characters who were Important, but I didn't feel like reading the other 10 books to find out who they were. I binged 7 or 8 of the Sword of Truth books in 1 year, but I barely remember a thing about them. Then I read Atlas Shrugged, and realized everything Goodkind was blathering had already been said, better.
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Aug 28, 2020 03:36
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Cobalt-60 posted:My sister read a bunch of the Dragonlance books, when she went from her Horse Girl to her Dragon Girl phase imo that's an upgrade. Dragon girl probably has a more realistic outlook on life.
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Aug 28, 2020 04:00
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Oh man I looked at the FR wiki to remember why teen me got so annoyed at Catti-Brie. Shes a loving mary-sue thats why. I guess RA decided to give Drizzt a human girl friend but she couldnt be like, in her 30s or something and actually experienced at life and good at anything, they had to meet when he was already an adult who'd gone through a hard rear end life and gained all his skills through actual experience and hard work, and she was...a teenager. Who was nice to him. He didnt have them be in love right away thankfully but i kinda hate that bella/edward poo poo anyway. So since she was a lovely teen and he was an accomplished adult RA had to do something to make her more on Drizzt's level so he (RA) started piling magic artifacts and poo poo on her. Years of bow experience? No, magic bow. Years of sword experience? No, magic sentient sword that only she somehow conquered its evil consciousness. Years of magic practice? No she gets some wand and a necklace or something and is suddenly good at magic and goes to train in it with some elf. Then apparently something happens in a book I didnt read where all of them but Drizzt die or something and she goes off to a god realm afterlife with some other guy and gets to dance in the woods and become deeply connected to that realm for some reason. Forgotten Realms Wiki posted:Catti-brie danced and sang continually within the forest and it was hinted that she became closely linked to the dimension and was in fact the spirit protector of all within, while Regis was simply a guest. Then they all get reincarnated, and she comes back and is super good at everything, and also super racist (not kidding) Forgotten Realms Wiki posted:She began to strongly advocate genocide, even to the extent of slaughtering newborn babies. Catti-brie even stated that she would take the blade herself to kill young children and even infants. Despite various logical arguments from the other Companions of the Hall, such as notable examples of goodly orcs and goblins like Nojheim, as well as factual evidence that orcs and dwarves coexisted for centuries in Baffenburg, she would have none of it. She even directly contradicted herself, first yielding that there may be exceptions to goodly goblinoids, to then stating that there were not, directly afterwards. Her lover, Drizzt Do'Urden, compared her radical attitude to those of the wicked matron mothers of Menzoberranzan.[51] The wiki makes no note of this actually being resolved or changing at any point. I didnt read ALL of the books this poo poo happens in but I definitely remember this is one of the things that made me stop reading them. I just hated this character so much. If you're going to have her die and be reincarnated ANYWAY why not just have her be an older human with something in common with the love interest, then she can die and be reborn, or something. Not like there arent ways in fantasy worlds to stop a human from getting old so they can hang out with her elf bae forever. She comes off as some 14 year old girl's self-insert fan-character made to be Drizzt's girlfriend, but shes been there since the first Icewind Dale book. e: gently caress I almost missed the part where she gets two "spellscars" on her arms, one is an hourglass and one is a loving unicorn. Usually the spellscars apparently show up as some kind of deformity, but hers showed up as some stick-on tattoos from claire's. Bismuth fucked around with this message at 04:17 on Aug 28, 2020 |
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Aug 28, 2020 04:14
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Lazyhound posted:This sounds sort of like the vaguely-remembered novel I came to post: I don't think so...I remember some cover with a lady in blue or purple dress, cupping her hands around one of the angel's feathers kinda floating there. They weren't elves at all, but the ship they worshiped as a god was totally a spaceship. I remember the main angel's brother/friend had the hots for a female angel, but they could never get together because angel and angel always made monsters (or so was said. No one ever tried). edit: found it. Called Archangel.
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Aug 28, 2020 04:21
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rotinaj posted:My problem with Dragonlance was that my first exposure to it was in a massive annotated book that was the first three books in one binding, and every page had lots of notes from the authors about why they did stuff and what the gaming backstory was of most of it. That sounds like something I would have hated as a child and loved as an adult.
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Aug 28, 2020 05:13
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Xenocides posted:Moorcock did it better with Elric. Elric is an anti-hero, a dick you can't help but to sympathize with. Raistlin seemingly is just a dick, too milquetoast to be a villain.
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Aug 28, 2020 10:07
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Colonel Cancer posted:Raistlins large adult brother became a fat sad alcoholic but then they just had to send him back in time to go to a fake gladiator fat camp I can't tell if this one is really in the books or if its made up
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Aug 28, 2020 10:24
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Vim Fuego posted:I can't tell if this one is really in the books or if its made up It's all real 
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Aug 28, 2020 11:14
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Epic Mount posted:I remember tossing the books when Raistlin and his brother Caramon were camping. Caramon asks his brother what the name of some spice was that sounded like their last name. Raistlin says "Marjoram.....it's called Marjoram......" and passes out One day I thought to myself "hey, maybe let's see what these star wars extended universe novels are all about" and on page 2 they started to describe hot chocolate as some weird alien thing and I just noped out. That's the entirety of my star wars reading experience
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Aug 28, 2020 12:17
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Han Solo fought a four meter tall otter.
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Aug 28, 2020 13:08
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Bismuth posted:Oh man I looked at the FR wiki to remember why teen me got so annoyed at Catti-Brie. Shes a loving mary-sue thats why. I guess RA decided to give Drizzt a human girl friend but she couldnt be like, in her 30s or something and actually experienced at life and good at anything, they had to meet when he was already an adult who'd gone through a hard rear end life and gained all his skills through actual experience and hard work, and she was...a teenager. Who was nice to him. He didnt have them be in love right away thankfully but i kinda hate that bella/edward poo poo anyway. she was probably pro-genocide because of all the xp
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Aug 28, 2020 13:35
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has there been a fantasy novel from the perspective of a party of murder hobos?
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Aug 28, 2020 13:47
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Prince Reggie K posted:has there been a fantasy novel from the perspective of a party of murder hobos? most of them?
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Aug 28, 2020 13:51
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Two Towers is basically a story of a bunch of literal tree-huggers thrashing a thriving industrial revolution city by the order of a weed-smoking hippie.
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Aug 28, 2020 14:09
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Maybe I want to be ruled by Saruman of Many Colors, "King" Aragorn 
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Aug 28, 2020 14:11
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Galewolf posted:Two Towers is basically a story of a bunch of literal tree-huggers thrashing a thriving industrial revolution city by the order of a weed-smoking hippie. Thats 100% my dream
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Aug 28, 2020 14:11
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I just started rereading the first Robert Asprin 'Myth' book, and it definitely fits into that category. I have noticed the following so far: The aforementioned casual misogyny is pretty mild thus far but I have vague recollections of some characters who would fit that description better. It's very uh...early YA in writing style, I guess. Straight to every point, light on figurative language which is only in the dialogue. Maybe I liked it because of how easy to read it was. Very genre-aware, almost fourth wall breaking without quite doing it. Puns mostly limited to the title. Hints of hard right politics dropped here and there.
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Aug 28, 2020 14:12
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I bought a good chunk of the legend of Drizzt books back in my early 20s. I didn't really mind them, never really got the ire people gave R.A. Salvatore. He at least wasn't a massive sex pest like some fantasy authors at the very least and his characters are fun and memorable. People do say his books had really good fight scenes in them but honestly my eyes would always glaze over everytime one started. I rather enjoyed them otherwise, they aren't high art, but I do enjoy the parts of the FR setting that he writes about. Also Jarlaxle is the best drow character. Anyway, could an elf named Asterion, truly be an elf in the Faerun setting, or was he perhaps adopted? Discuss.
Zeniel fucked around with this message at 14:53 on Aug 28, 2020 |
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Aug 28, 2020 14:49
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No Pants posted:i'm channeling the book barnyard poster who tried to read the dispossessed and had to put it down SHAKING with RAGE because she obviously had no understanding of the immaculate science of economics PLEASE tell me you have a link. PLEASE.
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Aug 28, 2020 14:51
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Samovar posted:PLEASE tell me you have a link. Seconding this. Also, Samovar: Very cool Corto Maltese avatar.
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Aug 28, 2020 14:53
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https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3938018 GBS Gor thread in case any of you hate Gor as much as I hate Dragonlance. (OK, I don't actually hate Dragonlance.) I can't remember if I posted it, but MST3K did a Gor sequel (?!) movie: 519, Outlaw of Gor
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Aug 28, 2020 15:19
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DrPossum posted:One day I thought to myself "hey, maybe let's see what these star wars extended universe novels are all about" and on page 2 they started to describe hot chocolate as some weird alien thing and I just noped out. That's the entirety of my star wars reading experience The only Star Wars books I’ve read are Splinter of the Mind’s Eye and the Han Solo adventures when they first came out, and I regret nothing. NOTHING!
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Aug 28, 2020 16:32
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at least the cartoon is good https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9yj5Ax6uzmc
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Aug 28, 2020 18:09
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The Breakfast Sampler posted:I used to work at a library so I read a lot of really nerdy poo poo inline with this. and I heard a lot of gushing about this series from similar idiots as myself. are there any current portal books that arent gross adolescent fantasies put out in the last couple of years? Its such a popular genre in other mediums.
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Aug 28, 2020 19:19
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Colonel Cancer posted:Someone mentioned Farseer trilogy itt is it any good? I read the first book when I was in highschool and all I remember is a sad clown and some dude being angsty about getting laid and then faking his death. Yeah well that happens for 3 books and it owns The hero just getting life poo poo at him for hundreds of pages E: Colonel Cancer posted:The Night Watch (Russian one not TP) had a hilarious movie back in maybe 2003. The bad guy pulls out his spine and beats people up with them while good guys use fluorescent light bulbs as lightsabers Impossible to decipher what the gently caress was happening in that movie Shageletic fucked around with this message at 19:36 on Aug 28, 2020 |
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Aug 28, 2020 19:26
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Blurry Gray Thing posted:Discworld is kind of a series you don't want to start at the beginning. I would say the best first Discworld book is either Guards! Guards!, Mort, or Wyrd Sisters. A lot of the earlier books are kind of weird and half-formed, like the series and the setting just isn't quite sure what it's doing yet. With those three, you don't need to know anything that came before, you get a solid story, and if you want, you can get direct follow-ups that remain completely consistent. I absolutely loved Going Postal, and I think its standalone nature might help someone decide if they want to get deeper into Discworld. Granted it doesn't have a lot of the 'standard' Discworld characters of course, but it's amazing and owns.
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Aug 28, 2020 19:38
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Galewolf posted:Jokes on you because I never read any other book than Earthsea from her, check-mate atheists Thats a mistake though, granted there's some wicked lame poo poo in King's bibliography but also some really great poo poo as well. Just a shame that 4th dark tower book never came out and all we got was a trilogy
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Aug 28, 2020 20:00
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Samovar posted:PLEASE tell me you have a link. I thought it was in one of the SF/Fantasy megathreads, but I think might have been this. Not as dramatic as I remembered, but very loving anarchists.
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Aug 28, 2020 20:15
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been ages since i read tehanu, but i remember that it wasn't as good as the first three
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Aug 28, 2020 20:15
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Bismuth posted:
Pre-9/11 Salvatore was all about how race and environment doesn't necessarily shape a character's alignment. Post-9/11 Salvatore was all about "good" supremacy and how evil followers of evil gods do evil things. It's hilarious because he spends thousands of pages trying to get across how his main character shouldn't be judged by the color of his skin and race and thousands more telling you why you should never trust elves with dark skin because they are raised to be psychopathic murder machines.
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Aug 28, 2020 20:19
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Prince Reggie K posted:has there been a fantasy novel from the perspective of a party of murder hobos? There's a section of Perdido Street Station where the protagonists hire some mercenaries who are very obviously a D&D adventuring party. They get slaughtered, and the one survivor is sad that his former comrade's magic pistol got left behind
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Aug 28, 2020 21:33
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Slippery posted:I absolutely loved Going Postal, and I think its standalone nature might help someone decide if they want to get deeper into Discworld. Granted it doesn't have a lot of the 'standard' Discworld characters of course, but it's amazing and owns. Moving Pictures is also kinda like that. I just now finished going thru it for the first time since high school and honestly it didn't get any worse.
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Aug 28, 2020 22:03
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Prince Reggie K posted:has there been a fantasy novel from the perspective of a party of murder hobos? Orcs by Mary Gentle?
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Aug 28, 2020 22:51
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Epic Mount posted:I remember tossing the books when Raistlin and his brother Caramon were camping. Caramon asks his brother what the name of some spice was that sounded like their last name. Raistlin says "Marjoram.....it's called Marjoram......" and passes out that actually kind of owns, though? like raistlin sounds like an irritating and lovely character, but i've always kind of had a soft spot for when fantasy addresses really mundane poo poo instead of having everyone's mind be one-track occupied by Big Important Things
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Aug 28, 2020 23:03
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Galewolf posted:This might be a "trap sprung!" post but I legit had tears when it happened in the books. I know I would groan like the jaded boomer I am today if I get to read them again but for 18 year old me, I was there bro. I'm not sure what this says about me but the bit that made 13 year old me tear up is when the senile old evil dragon flies to protect 'her kids' and gets iced.
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Aug 28, 2020 23:10
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feedmegin posted:Orcs by Mary Gentle? also, uh, don't read this book. I had to jog my memory real quick to make sure I was thinking of the right one (it's actually called Grunts), and to give you an idea, the author appears to think the idea of an orc raping an elf child to death, to the point of "splitting" the elf, is the funniest thing ever it's over-the-top edgy to borderline  levels and not good enough to be worth it
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Aug 28, 2020 23:13
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