Outrail posted:

Huh, I thought cops were civilians. Welp

Dareon posted:

I barely know her!

H.P. Hovercraft posted:

kennedy definitely had a tiny dick from being squeezed into a smaller shape by so many vaginas

Jerusalem posted:

"I'm wearing a chain worth 140k while you pay me to play your videogame."

Late stage capitalism really is a hell of a thing.

Pick posted:

hosed-Up Little Dog posted:

Please don't die surrounded by dozens of half-finished replica anal prolapses

shut up blegum posted:

'

spin-dry posted:

I just had an absolute BULLSHIT experience at gamestop. Lets just assume I won the lottery. I could give a poo poo of weather a game is USED and 5 dollars less..
But the employee was pushing every piece of bullshit used game he could on me and even recommending piece of poo poo games just because they're used. OK not to mention the DIPSHITS they allow to loiter in their place EVERY DAY. As soon as you walk in LOUD MOUTHED LARRY WANTS TO TELL EVERYONE ABOUT HIS WONDERFUL ANIME FIGHTING GAME

Never ever ever buy from that hole in the wall. They exploit the idea that they are a "game shop" so as to shuck off their poo poo-for-nothing wares and no good deals.

The didn't even have 1 copy of half the top selling games. "OH We've got that one used right here"

gently caress U

(USER WAS BANNED FOR THIS POST)

Outrail posted:

Lol at copping a ban for anything Gamestop related.

Dip Viscous posted:

rutger hauer racing, a kart racer where you can select from 60 different rutger hauer characters

pole position lost, like tears in rain

Jolo posted:

Hitcher Rutger starts without a kart and has to hitch a ride and psychologically torment the actual driver into driving the kart well. He has dialogue options instead of gas/brake/steering.

gary oldmans diary posted:

if only you could see what ive seen with your headlights

Jolo posted:

Little guage in the bottom right indicates your miles per Hauer.

hard counter posted:

Solice Kirsk posted:

Woah, that's like a threeba.

shut up blegum posted:

'

mind the walrus posted:

Cojawfee posted:

Everytime I want to watch 2001, I remember I have to get through that ape sequence first.

3D Megadoodoo posted:

Turn on the TV?

LifeSunDeath posted:

The thing I've never understood about 70's shorts is, was people's junk just constantly falling out, was that a common issue? Seems impossible to avoid.

Oscar Wild posted:

I tie mine around my ankle so that problem doesn't happen.

Proteus Jones posted:

Wouldn't that make it difficult to walk, tying your shorts around your ankle?

S.D. posted:

Does anyone have links to previous forum quote threads? There was a history-related quote that I wanted to try to look for.

Etherwind posted:

I'll try to remember it in full. It's a worst experience, so it fits in here.

A friend of mine, one of my regular players, borrowed my Call of Cthulhu material and decided he was going to run a game at the gaming society we both attend. This was a bad idea for a couple of reasons, the first being that it's hard to do evocative horror when you have a busy, happy background going on around you (unless you're specifically playing up the social alienation angle). The second, and more important, reason it was a bad idea was because he invited Donnie to play.

Donnie is a good guy. I ran a Blue Rose campaign, he played in it, and it was great fun for all involved. However, Donnie is not a subtle guy, and he's not the sort of guy who can experience horror or exercise fearful judgement when it's required. As evidence toward this, when the group was rolling up reasonable, urbane, ordinary Call of Cthulhu characters, he decided to make a doctor.

With maximum ranks in the "headbutt" skill. More points in "headbutt" than he had in "medicine", and his character was a doctor. My friend convinced him to at least make his "medicine" skill equal to "headbutt", and the game proceeded on track.

You know the old saying, "Give a man a hammer, and everything looks like a nail?" Well, when you turn a man into a hammer, the same thing is true. Donnie tried to headbutt everything even vaguely problematic. It started with a door that wouldn't open, escalated to an ATM (which he scored a critical success against, and landed some free cash) and climaxed with him headbutting a skeleton after stumbling out-

Let's wind it back a bit. During the course of the adventure, when they started encountering horrific skeletons that stalked their every move during the night, the party decided to tool up on weaponry. They visited a mall, broke in, and decided to ransack some of the shops to acquire weapons. Someone got a fire axe from a hardware store. Most got guns from a gun store. Donnie, since he liked fireworks, decided to drive to the local mining supply depot while this was happening, and after headbutting his way into a badly locked supply shack he made off with a backpack full of dynamite.

Eventually they tracked the skeletons down to an old well in the back garden of a manor house, and after a bit of research discovered that it had a cursed stone in at the bottom. Being pro-active, Donnie suggested they lower him into the well with a flashlight and his dynamite, and he'd rig it to blow. It sounded plausible, so they lowered him down with the flashlight and a pistol, and waited until he was in place.

Messing around in the thick mud at the bottom, his flashlight soon failed. Not alarmed, Donnie started feeling around to find the cursed stone, and was in the process of feeling its edges when the cursed blood he was sloshing around in began to form into yet more skeletons, as it was so dark down there it might as well be night. A skeleton grabbed the rope and pulled it down, and then began wrestling with him, dragging him into the mud.

Donnie let out a shout. Up at the top of the well, the rest of the party thought he was asking for the dynamite, and tossed it down. Desperately, Donnie began to headbutt the dynamite, hoping to set it off before the skeleton flayed him alive. Cue the following exchange:

"He's taking a long time down there."
"Can you see what's going on?"
"No, my flashlight isn't working."
"Give me those matches."

The player fumbled and dropped the match, and Donnie simultaneously landed a critical hit with his headbutt.

A massive explosion blew the well to smithereens. Rolling on the resistance table, Donnie survived the initial explosion, was thrown several blocks away, and crashed into some lady's house, breaking his legs. Understandably panicked, the lady called an ambulance, and five minutes later it turned up. At this point Donnie regained consciousness, and rather than be taken to hospital, he held the ambulance crew up with his pistol and stole the ambulance.

Meanwhile, a horrible, rapidly decaying, muddy skeleton made from blood and charred, broken stone clawed its way out of the well in the shadow of the (now wrecked) house and began to advance on the party. Cue a massive combat that grew rapidly more tense, until it was interrupted by the sound of...

Sirens? The ambulance crashed through the fence, ran over the skeleton and screeched to a halt. Donnie, his legs broken, staggered out of the ambulance and fell to the ground, right beside the pinned monster. It proceeded to try and grab him, and he responded the only way he knew how.

With a headbutt.

Edit: and remember, it's Doctor McHeadbutt. He worked long and hard for that PhD in Aggressive Phrenology.

Phy posted:

I have never been able to figure out how that was a Worst Experience, unless the poster was dead set on having a hella spooky time

Vincent Van Goatse posted:

Thanks to that thread I found the Saga of Doctor McHeadbutt again, and I'm not going to check the last 760+ pages to see if it's been posted already so enjoy.

Dagen H posted:

Like reading ur posts

Carthag Tuek posted:

Went and dug up a bunch of old quote threads. The early PYF ones are often pretty anemic, I guess they fell off page 1 during the gold rush (PYF was created in november 2005) and never got contributed much to.

pre:

(in the goldmine, not sure if there are more in there)
2003.01.15	2003.01.28	https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=372479
(in PYF)
2005.12.02	2005.12.05	https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=1738536
2005.11.28	2005.12.06	https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=1734134
2006.01.20	2006.01.24	https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=1778640
2006.02.28	2006.02.28	https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=1812924
2007.03.15	2009.12.09	https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=2378183
2009.12.09	2010.10.19	https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3238826
2010.12.14	2013.03.05	https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3373573
2013.03.12	2013.10.25	https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3538112
2014.01.04	2014.09.02	https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3599972
2014.09.02	2015.01.15	https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3662147
2015.01.16	2015.10.31	https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3695000
2015.10.31	current	https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3749412

Carthag Tuek posted:

Someone was looking for old quote threads, here they are:

fool of sound posted:

PopeCrunch posted:

The tortilla fedora caught fire in the oven when I was trying to crisp it up a little, the rice paper trucker cap just CRUMBLED INTO DUST when I picked it up after spending an hour making the loving thing, and the pancake hat was just floppy and dumb like my fat dumb asscheeks.

This sounds like a verse of Blinded by the Light.

Phy posted:

I have never been able to figure out how that was a Worst Experience, unless the poster was dead set on having a hella spooky time

mmj posted:

There's another great one of these about a guy with an old school adversarial gm so the guy made a cranky old man character with like 600 pages of backstory so he could always say his character actually had x experience or whatever and be just as lovely as the gm. It ended with him singing oh Canada in an abandoned hockey rink while shooting slapshots of explosives at an avatar of an old god trying to be reborn, but the journey made it much less monkeycheese random than that short summary makes it out to be.

A FESTIVE SKELETON posted:

freeedr posted:

Volume two was better. I really feel like three is where they started going downhill, though still worth a listen

Phy posted:

"Cylinders going downhill" is a valid genre in its own right

Carthag Tuek posted:

Someone was looking for old quote threads, here they are:

zoux posted:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/HMS_Gay_Viking

Hugs Boson posted:

Wait... so the Gay Viking, the Gay Corsair, and Master Standfast were on a secret mission to smuggle Swedish ball bearings, when the seamen of the Gay Viking had to get off after two ships bumped into each other?

That's what you get when you let 13-year-olds write your history books.

zoux posted:

"In the dark, something rammed the Gay Viking from behind. 'That's queer,' thought Seaman Rod Johnson, as he reached around his bunk."

S.D. posted:

Much obliged! And I found the quotes I was looking for:

Phy posted:

I have never been able to figure out how that was a Worst Experience, unless the poster was dead set on having a hella spooky time

Bad Wolf posted:

There are two types of D&D players, those who want to play Lord of The Rings, and those who want to play Monty Python and the Holy Grail. The latter tend to outnumber and annoy the former. Here's a quote from a game I saw on Youtube once.

GM : I wanted a serious Star Wars campaign
Player : Dude, this is Spaceballs and you know it.

Neddy Seagoon posted:

That's not an SA thing, you're thinking of the saga of Old Man Henderson. All he wanted was to know who stole his goddamn garden gnomes.

Promoted Pawn posted:

There’s a real possibility that Bad Boys for Life will be the highest grossing movie of 2020.

SLOSifl posted:

Contestant: what is Bad Boys for Life

(Audience produces vibrations by rubbing their hind legs against their carapaces)

ChubbyChecker posted:

why do people use words like "kramering"

Mr. Fix It posted:

because we're old and have fond memories of Kramer vs. Kramer