|
left_unattended posted:Had a memory come up on Facebook recently about the social media generation discovering magic eye pictures, and some little poo poo commented, "my Dad has a whole book of these!" I could feel the grey hairs growing. I'm only loving 32. That's about when I got my first grey hair. Welcome to old.
|
#
?
Aug 26, 2020 14:54
|
|
|
|
| # ? May 16, 2024 06:08 |
|
|
I got my first grey hair as a teenager.
|
|
#
?
Aug 26, 2020 22:13
|
|
|
So I was over at my parent's place for my birthday celebration the other day, and my mom had dug up a pile of old colouring books and whatever from my early childhood, which included the following gem. For context, the exercise was to put the correct facial expression on the kid in the appropriate situation: It's worth noting that all the other "this is how to not be a psychopath"-exercises were solved correctly, so this was 100% me being a hilarious troll kid. Whether or not I was a super funny five year old or this just proves my sense of humour hasn't evolved since then is an open question, since I laughed my rear end off when I found it.
|
|
#
?
Aug 27, 2020 00:46
|
|
|
Covski posted:So I was over at my parent's place for my birthday celebration the other day, and my mom had dug up a pile of old colouring books and whatever from my early childhood, which included the following gem. For context, the exercise was to put the correct facial expression on the kid in the appropriate situation: Lysande!
|
|
#
?
Aug 27, 2020 07:09
|
|
|
Tack!
|
|
#
?
Aug 27, 2020 20:14
|
|
|
My youngest has been watching science programs. "What is density?" "Well, you are shorter than your brother, but you're heavier, so you're more dense." "Oh, so THAT'S why I'm afraid of water!"
|
|
#
?
Aug 28, 2020 01:38
|
|
|
Today a kid was coloring a picture that had, among other things, a shark and a turtle. The turtle was brown with a red shell and the shark was green thanks to this kid's efforts. Another kid came up and said "sharks aren't green" to which the original kid replied "no it's Christmas under the sea. The turtle is Santa, there's a Christmas blow-up fish*, and the shark is the Grinch  "*this refers to a multicolored pufferfish in the picture.
|
|
#
?
Aug 31, 2020 01:37
|
|
|
"What are you eating?" "A wrap." "What's in it?" "Duck." "Ew, you're eating a thing that have wings!" And this from a kid who I've seen eating deep fried crickets.
|
|
#
?
Sep 4, 2020 18:04
|
|
|
I was at work the other day and had to use the bathroom. I went in, passed a kid (five, maybe six) and his dad, and went into the stall. Then, in hushed tones, I hear this kid say, "Wow, Dad, even though he works here, he still has to go potty!"
|
|
#
?
Sep 15, 2020 02:46
|
|
|
My 5 year old has been talking a lot about his penis lately. He’s also been watching a lot of songs from Moana. Tonight while he was in the bath he was talking to his penis and said “You’re stronger than the crab in Moana.”
|
|
#
?
Sep 19, 2020 03:30
|
|
|
A girl walks in with obviously new glasses (I didn't know this at the time but they're just blue light protection ones for all the screen time she necessarily has now school has started) "Those are nice glasses, I love them" "IM NOT BLIND MR FAST CARS"
|
|
#
?
Oct 22, 2020 04:57
|
|
|
Leavemywife posted:I was at work the other day and had to use the bathroom. I went in, passed a kid (five, maybe six) and his dad, and went into the stall. Then, in hushed tones, I hear this kid say, "Wow, Dad, even though he works here, he still has to go potty!" I used to work in a video game store and I (surprise, goons!) am a bespectacled nerd. I once had a kid of about 4 stare at me intensely and ask if I was Peter Parker.
|
|
#
?
Oct 22, 2020 11:38
|
|
|
Disco Pope posted:I used to work in a video game store and I (surprise, goons!) am a bespectacled nerd. I once had a kid of about 4 stare at me intensely and ask if I was Peter Parker. ...well? Are you?
|
|
#
?
Oct 22, 2020 12:09
|
|
|
Samovar posted:...well? Are you? Only Peter Parker and emphatically, definitely, absolutely not Spider-Man
|
|
#
?
Oct 22, 2020 15:51
|
|
|
Disco Pope posted:Only Peter Parker and emphatically, definitely, absolutely not Spider-Man Well, of course not. You can't take photos of yourself. That kind of technology just doesn't exist.
|
|
#
?
Oct 22, 2020 17:20
|
|
|
https://twitter.com/LaserCorn/status/1320457351837659137
|
|
#
?
Oct 26, 2020 02:37
|
|
|
Lil dude is ahead of the curve.
|
|
#
?
Oct 26, 2020 04:41
|
|
|
I wish my job gave me the satisfaction of watching a pile of rocks get bigger
|
|
#
?
Oct 26, 2020 05:38
|
|
|
RandomFerret posted:I wish my job gave me the satisfaction of watching a pile of rocks get bigger
|
|
#
?
Oct 26, 2020 05:52
|
|
|
RandomFerret posted:I wish my job gave me the satisfaction of watching a pile of rocks get bigger
|
|
#
?
Oct 26, 2020 13:15
|
|
|
RandomFerret posted:I wish my job
|
|
#
?
Oct 26, 2020 14:14
|
|
|
This is kinda sorta within the remit of this thread:FactsAreUseless posted:Spun off from the other thread. This Unofficial World of Nintendo had a section titled Fun Stuff!!! where users could submit their own ideas for game characters, cheats, enemies, and endings. Go check it out, it's really, really good. https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3945537
|
|
#
?
Oct 27, 2020 13:16
|
|
|
Second hand story: My sister lying in the bed, hears whispering; rolls over to the 3 year old next to her, holding open his diaper, whispering, "this is my *favorite* penis."
|
|
#
?
Nov 3, 2020 14:43
|
|
|
I can sympathize with that feeling.
|
|
#
?
Nov 3, 2020 14:46
|
|
|
Getting ready to give a 2 year old his flu vaccine, and he goes "Don't do dis!"  (I still did and he gave me a high 5 afterwards)
|
|
#
?
Nov 6, 2020 19:10
|
|
|
Niece now three and a half, negotiating with her mother for candy. It's a bag of mixed types and she claims she isn't sure which she wants. Mum says, you can have two. So she asks for Mum to put out two of each kind, so she can look at them and decide. She makes a big show of thinking, tapping her finger with her chin, and then says, "Oh, I can't decide!" and sweeps all ten pieces into her bowl.
|
|
#
?
Nov 6, 2020 22:58
|
|
|
That sinking feeling when you realize that your kid is probably going to grow up to be a divorce lawyer.
|
|
#
?
Nov 6, 2020 23:02
|
|
|
My almost 2 year old nephew visiting my parents, we were having spring rolls & he saw the soy bottle and went "sushi!" He's never had sushi so that was weird. My sister asked what he meant and he was like "Jenny, home" and we tried to ask for more but he had no more to add. Time for eatin'... A couple days later, my dad picks him up from the nursery and he likes to smalltalk. Turns out one of the employees there is named Jenny and her husband works at a sushi place so she sometimes brings sushi for lunch with the other adults. Welp, there you go. There was a coherent idea behind the words, but we would never have known except for random smalltalk. That was around a month ago. Now he's like "I'm wearing a bare stomach" when he doesn't have a shirt on, or "What's that thing there right there?" while pointing at a thing he knows what is, with a cheeky grin cause he knows we know he knows It's such a wild threshold when their thoughts are way more developed than their language & they either get super pissed cause they cant say what they mean or we dont get it and then it clicks and they're so into speaking cause it super rules to get others to understand what you're feeling or thinking. It oscillates for a while there but oh man those moments 
Carthag Tuek has a new favorite as of 23:25 on Nov 6, 2020 |
|
#
?
Nov 6, 2020 23:23
|
|
|
Carthag Tuek posted:It's such a wild threshold when their thoughts are way more developed than their language & they either get super pissed cause they cant say what they mean or we dont get it and then it clicks and they're so into speaking cause it super rules to get others to understand what you're feeling or thinking. It oscillates for a while there but oh man those moments There's still a running joke in my family regarding my oldest cousin, when he was very young he loved to talk (and he was obviously trying to talk, not just babble) but absolutely nobody could understand him, so he wound up saying "Eeot" and walked away once. They figured out he meant "idiot", so any time we see bad drivers and the like we talk about all the "eeots" running around  .
|
|
#
?
Nov 7, 2020 06:46
|
|
|
Kids that age are a blast to talk to. I remember my son came over to me a few times when he was 3 or 4 and said "Papa, let's have conversation." So we did.
|
|
#
?
Nov 7, 2020 18:06
|
|
|
One of my old coworkers told us about her four-year-old grandson who liked to tell people what 'the word on the street is'.
|
|
#
?
Nov 7, 2020 18:37
|
|
|
My 8 year old autistic son got into his mom's nail polish to paint his fingernails. Me: "Do you have permission?" Him: "I have infinite permission."
|
|
#
?
Nov 28, 2020 23:23
|
|
|
Lucky kid. I do not have infinite permission. When I want to use nail polish, I have to buy my own. ...look, clear nail polish is really good for my nails, alright? They break easily. Don't judge.
|
|
#
?
Nov 28, 2020 23:27
|
|
|
marshmallow creep posted:My 8 year old autistic son got into his mom's nail polish to paint his fingernails. sudo chmod -R 777 /*
|
|
#
?
Nov 29, 2020 13:16
|
|
|
A two-year-old has a novel solution to the trolley problem: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-N_RZJUAQY4
|
|
#
?
Nov 30, 2020 08:32
|
|
|
|
|
#
?
Dec 2, 2020 16:10
|
|
|
marshmallow creep posted:My 8 year old autistic son got into his mom's nail polish to paint his fingernails. drat. You can't argue with that.
|
|
#
?
Dec 2, 2020 18:01
|
|
|
https://twitter.com/feralcrone/status/564171596303458304?s=21
|
|
#
?
Dec 5, 2020 02:00
|
|
|
Pththya-lyi posted:A two-year-old has a novel solution to the trolley problem: Kids are such precious monsters!
|
|
#
?
Dec 5, 2020 03:46
|
|
|
|
| # ? May 16, 2024 06:08 |
|
|
https://twitter.com/alixeharrow/status/1338656341724975104?s=21
|
|
#
?
Dec 15, 2020 19:23
|
|
