- xcheopis
-
|
Hitler: Ha ha, you Dummköpfe thought you were going to get to kill me but guess whaaaaaaaat? (puts gun to head)
"You can't fire me; I quit!" on hard-mode.
Everywhere, everyone is red and green
I gotta lust for glory and a tape machine
I'm living out Frank Coppola's dreams
Outta my mind, I'm feelin' mean
|
#
?
Dec 21, 2020 03:36
|
|
- Adbot
-
ADBOT LOVES YOU
|
|
|
#
?
May 24, 2024 15:52
|
|
- FactsAreUseless
-
|
A Black Mirror episode that explores the idea of an authentic Hitler sex tape being released on the internet.
|
|
#
?
Dec 21, 2020 06:28
|
|
- canyoneer
-
I only have canyoneyes for you
|
A Black Mirror episode that explores the idea of an authentic Hitler sex tape being released on the internet.
It's brief. Only one nut
|
|
#
?
Dec 21, 2020 07:02
|
|
- Prurient Squid
-
Tiddy cat Buddha improving your day.
|
A guy whose name is Dick Joke.
|
|
#
?
Dec 21, 2020 14:39
|
|
- nut
-
|
I needed the money ok
|
|
#
?
Dec 21, 2020 14:39
|
|
- Prurient Squid
-
Tiddy cat Buddha improving your day.
|
No, his name is Richard Johnson Knob and it abbreviates to Dick JK.
|
|
#
?
Dec 21, 2020 21:56
|
|
- Prof. Crocodile
-
|
A guy whose name is Dick Joke.
I once met a guy named Richard Move. That's probably the best username ever, but I'm sure it's been taken.
|
|
#
?
Dec 22, 2020 04:11
|
|
- Finger Prince
-
|
This one's really only for a highly specific scenario, but should you ever find yourself, late one morning, discussing with your partner keeping chickens in your backyard, and they finally acquiesce to your desire to do so...
For the first time in history
We're gonna start raising hens
We're raising hens, hallelujah, we're raising hens, amen
I'm gonna go out to run and let myself get
Some egg producing, clucking pets!
We're raising hens, hallelujah
We're raising hens, every specimen
Brown, white, naked neck,
Plymouth rock, Rhode Island red!
Finger Prince fucked around with this message at 21:11 on Dec 22, 2020
|
|
#
?
Dec 22, 2020 18:25
|
|
- The Klowner
-
by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
|
in 2019 my prediction for 2020 was that people were going to be making "hindsight is 2020" jokes so often that I would get incredibly annoyed whenever I saw it. in retrospect it's very much in the lower order of things to be annoyed by this year
|
|
#
?
Dec 22, 2020 21:50
|
|
- google THIS
-
|
Stealing an original character but like in a heist movie.
Being lowered from the ceiling through a laser grid toward a glass case containing Jake the Hedgehog, who is a little shy but all the girls like him and also he skateboards and he's half vampire.
|
|
#
?
Dec 24, 2020 18:47
|
|
- google THIS
-
|
Indy: That belongs on a DeviantArt page! (Commissions now open!)
|
|
#
?
Dec 24, 2020 18:49
|
|
- Prof. Crocodile
-
|
Stealing an original character but like in a heist movie.
Being lowered from the ceiling through a laser grid toward a glass case containing Jake the Hedgehog, who is a little shy but all the girls like him and also he skateboards and he's half vampire.
this idea is too good to just let go. need one of our resident artists to immortalize it.
|
|
#
?
Dec 24, 2020 19:42
|
|
- Yinlock
-
|
feast on my resin dick, g.i joe
|
|
#
?
Dec 25, 2020 01:14
|
|
- The Klowner
-
by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
|
Stealing an original character but like in a heist movie.
Being lowered from the ceiling through a laser grid toward a glass case containing Jake the Hedgehog, who is a little shy but all the girls like him and also he skateboards and he's half vampire.
this idea is too good to just let go. need one of our resident artists to immortalize it.
|
|
#
?
Dec 26, 2020 00:28
|
|
- Wilkins Micawber
-
as we leave this existence
looking for another
|
They say "tender and mild" about the baby Jesus, or whatever. Right? I think so. But what if, maybe the baby Jesus was a pack of smokes. Imagine that, a pack of smokes! The baby Jesus. Hope you're following along here because now comes the twist,: black and mild. Alright gently caress you , I don't have to impress you Merry suck my Dick!!
|
|
#
?
Dec 26, 2020 01:14
|
|
- Yinlock
-
|
the power rangers are trying to think of an excuse to get out of class as a giant monster destroys the city but the teacher is having none of it
|
|
#
?
Dec 27, 2020 18:58
|
|
- Gene Hackman Fan
-
by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
|
the power rangers are trying to think of an excuse to get out of class as a giant monster destroys the city but the teacher is having none of it
"come on, folks, you expect me to believe that a giant spacemonster is attacking the city? i mean, sure, once is understandable, but this is the seventh time *this* month you're telling me this. what's going on?"
----------------
This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!
|
|
#
?
Dec 27, 2020 19:08
|
|
- Gene Hackman Fan
-
by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
|
AND IF IT HAPPENS DURING MR JOHNSON'S CLASS HE CAN GIVE YOU PERMISSION TO LEAVE
----------------
This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!
|
|
#
?
Dec 27, 2020 19:10
|
|
- Dip Viscous
-
|
a guy standing by the side of the road holding up a big cardboard sign that just says gently caress EGGS
|
|
#
?
Dec 28, 2020 05:03
|
|
- Cubone
-
Because it never leaves its bedroom, no one has ever seen this poster's real face.
|
the new weightlifting horror movie is surprisingly dark
that's all I've got so far
|
|
#
?
Dec 28, 2020 07:27
|
|
- Yinlock
-
|
"come on, folks, you expect me to believe that a giant spacemonster is attacking the city? i mean, sure, once is understandable, but this is the seventh time *this* month you're telling me this. what's going on?"
"I don't know who signed this doctor's note but i'm pretty sure "Zordon" isn't a licensed practitioner"
|
|
#
?
Dec 28, 2020 07:49
|
|
- canyoneer
-
I only have canyoneyes for you
|
a financial advisor pronouncing Roth IRA to rhyme with "Gojira"
|
|
#
?
Dec 28, 2020 17:46
|
|
- The Klowner
-
by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
|
a guy standing by the side of the road holding up a big cardboard sign that just says gently caress EGGS
honking my horn at the gently caress eggs guy every day on my drive to work. "this guy gets it"
|
|
#
?
Dec 28, 2020 18:29
|
|
- Prurient Squid
-
Tiddy cat Buddha improving your day.
|
90s Klingon Hip Hop.
|
|
#
?
Dec 28, 2020 19:39
|
|
- Prof. Crocodile
-
|
A redux of that old "Barkley vs. Godzilla" ad campaign from the 90's, but this time it is Charles Barkley and Godzilla arguing loudly about politics in line at a Panera bread, and things are said that probably shouldn't have been said, and they both look so old that it makes you feel old too.
|
|
#
?
Dec 29, 2020 02:28
|
|
- Prurient Squid
-
Tiddy cat Buddha improving your day.
|
You've all heared of the flying nun. But since the invention of the catapult aren't all nuns (potentially) flying nuns? 
|
|
#
?
Dec 29, 2020 13:29
|
|
- Yinlock
-
|
You've all heared of the flying nun. But since the invention of the catapult aren't all nuns (potentially) flying nuns?
I've recently heard news of this "flying nun" everyone is talking about, which leaves me with a question for our nuns: why can't you fly? do you not love Jesus enough???
|
|
#
?
Dec 29, 2020 14:06
|
|
- The Klowner
-
by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
|
I believe I can fly
I believe I can touch the sky
I think about it every night and day
Call up my nuns and fly away
|
|
#
?
Dec 31, 2020 16:29
|
|
- dracula vladdy AF
-
|
a company that is able to remove memories, but specifically they're only able to erase the plot of terminator 2 from your mind, so you can go into it fresh, not knowing if the terminator is good this time or not.
also it removes the memory of guns'n roses video for the song "you could be mine" just to be sure
|
|
#
?
Jan 1, 2021 01:20
|
|
- dracula vladdy AF
-
|
tbh less of a joke and more just something that would be cool
|
|
#
?
Jan 1, 2021 01:21
|
|
- google THIS
-
|
a company that is able to remove memories, but specifically they're only able to erase the plot of terminator 2 from your mind, so you can go into it fresh, not knowing if the terminator is good this time or not.
also it removes the memory of guns'n roses video for the song "you could be mine" just to be sure
This, except the solutions to classic adventure games
|
|
#
?
Jan 1, 2021 01:31
|
|
- Dip Viscous
-
|
~6 people in a room with a really nice glossy photo of an rear end but it's edited to be super dramatic like a reality tv show
"drat, that's a pretty cool thong... poo poo, does anyone have nail clippers with them?"
*cuts to same guy with hand severed, geysering blood all over*
|
|
#
?
Jan 3, 2021 13:29
|
|
- RickRogers
-
Woh, is that a thing I like??
|
Hi ho, Kermit the frog here and...I'm just so sick of this poo poo.
|
|
#
?
Jan 4, 2021 19:39
|
|
- mailorder bees
-
FLUFFERNUTTER
|
REO peewagon
thanks Manifisto!
|
|
#
?
Jan 5, 2021 05:45
|
|
- Dip Viscous
-
|
Hoyle Diver
|
|
#
?
Jan 5, 2021 09:39
|
|
- google THIS
-
|
Going to my alterations man to get the hem let down a bit on my latest condom purchase
Sir, I'm never going to be able to finish this needlework if you keep flinching
|
|
#
?
Jan 5, 2021 16:02
|
|
- Adbot
-
ADBOT LOVES YOU
|
|
|
#
?
May 24, 2024 15:52
|
|
- RickRogers
-
Woh, is that a thing I like??
|
No sir I assure you, it is vertical stripes that are slimming.
|
|
#
?
Jan 5, 2021 17:06
|
|
#
?
Dec 21, 2020 03:36
