[Malarkey Zone] fuck the malarkey and pay me you old fuck

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > C-SPAM > [Malarkey Zone] fuck the malarkey and pay me you old fuck

galenanorth: May 19, 2016

The first 20 minutes were the worst part of the movie because it ripped off too many jokes from social media and had too many pop culture references, and then it settled down into a much better movie when the rest stopped shoehorning those in. Except for the opening scene where Sonic was testing his speed using the cop's speed camera radar, the cop could've been any other occupation, like a home repairman (in keeping with the "town's fix-it-man and go-for guy" role), but Hollywood can't help but make every movie have a cop for a major character.

galenanorth has issued a correction as of 23:48 on Feb 18, 2021

# ? Feb 18, 2021 23:42

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# ? Jun 2, 2024 12:07

Inspector Hound: Jul 14, 2003

I think it's just because cops have those speed guns

# ? Feb 18, 2021 23:43

Mameluke: Aug 2, 2013; by Fluffdaddy

I think maybe it's because Western nations are basically police juntas

# ? Feb 18, 2021 23:59

twoday: May 4, 2005; C-SPAM Times best-selling author

Buddykins : What's the premise of this thread?

George Costanza : I think I can sum up the thread for you in one word. Nothing.

Foo Diddley : Well, as I was saying, I would post as myself, as a former pizza cook, and I would make comments about stuff and talk about yardwork I've done, which is all true.

George Costanza : Yeah, but nothing happens in the thread. You see, it's just like life. You know, you eat, you go shopping, you read, you eat, you read, you go shopping.

Buddykins : All right, tell me about the stories. What kind of stories?

George Costanza : Oh, no. No stories.

Buddykins: No stories? So what is it?

George Costanza : What did you do today?

Buddykins : I got up and I snorted cocaine.

George Costanza : There's a thread. That's a thread.

Buddykins : How is that a thread?

Foo Diddley : Well, maybe something happens to you on the way to your dealer.

George Costanza : No, no, no! Nothing happens!

Buddykins : Well, why am I reading it?

George Costanza : Because it's on C-SPAM.

# ? Feb 19, 2021 00:01

ArmedZombie: Jun 6, 2004

Inspector Hound posted:

I think it's just because cops have those speed guns

it could have been a pitching coach they have speed guns

# ? Feb 19, 2021 00:04

ArmedZombie: Jun 6, 2004

i have speed guns greg, can you milk me?

# ? Feb 19, 2021 00:04

frankenfreak: Feb 16, 2007; I SCORED 85% ON A QUIZ ABOUT MONDAY NIGHT RAW AND ALL I GOT WAS THIS LOUSY TEXT

#bastionboogerbrigade

twoday posted:

Buddykins : Well, why am I reading it?

George Costanza : Because it's on C-SPAM.

# ? Feb 19, 2021 00:08

Aceofblue: Feb 26, 2009

twoday posted:

George Costanza : No, no, no! Nothing happens!

Buddykins : Well, why am I reading it?

George Costanza : Because it's on C-SPAM.

lol gently caress

# ? Feb 19, 2021 00:17

Vim Fuego: Jun 1, 2000; Ultra Carp

twoday posted:

Buddykins : What's the premise of this thread?

George Costanza : I think I can sum up the thread for you in one word. Nothing.

Foo Diddley : Well, as I was saying, I would post as myself, as a former pizza cook, and I would make comments about stuff and talk about yardwork I've done, which is all true.

George Costanza : Yeah, but nothing happens in the thread. You see, it's just like life. You know, you eat, you go shopping, you read, you eat, you read, you go shopping.

Buddykins : All right, tell me about the stories. What kind of stories?

George Costanza : Oh, no. No stories.

Buddykins: No stories? So what is it?

George Costanza : What did you do today?

Buddykins : I got up and I snorted cocaine.

George Costanza : There's a thread. That's a thread.

Buddykins : How is that a thread?

Foo Diddley : Well, maybe something happens to you on the way to your dealer.

George Costanza : No, no, no! Nothing happens!

Buddykins : Well, why am I reading it?

George Costanza : Because it's on C-SPAM.

# ? Feb 19, 2021 00:24

Homeless Friend: Jul 16, 2007

twoday posted:

Buddykins : What's the premise of this thread?

George Costanza : I think I can sum up the thread for you in one word. Nothing.

Foo Diddley : Well, as I was saying, I would post as myself, as a former pizza cook, and I would make comments about stuff and talk about yardwork I've done, which is all true.

George Costanza : Yeah, but nothing happens in the thread. You see, it's just like life. You know, you eat, you go shopping, you read, you eat, you read, you go shopping.

Buddykins : All right, tell me about the stories. What kind of stories?

George Costanza : Oh, no. No stories.

Buddykins: No stories? So what is it?

George Costanza : What did you do today?

Buddykins : I got up and I snorted cocaine.

George Costanza : There's a thread. That's a thread.

Buddykins : How is that a thread?

Foo Diddley : Well, maybe something happens to you on the way to your dealer.

George Costanza : No, no, no! Nothing happens!

Buddykins : Well, why am I reading it?

George Costanza : Because it's on C-SPAM.

# ? Feb 19, 2021 00:32

post COVID: Mar 5, 2007; free college, free healthcare, free Shmurda

oh poo poo i didn't know there was a cocaine thread

# ? Feb 19, 2021 00:34

some plague rats: Jun 5, 2012; by Fluffdaddy

Lib and let die posted:

if i have to hear another sales dick say that they need to "tell our story" i'm going to scream, and not even bother hitting the mute button.

you sell phone systems to insurance companies. there isn't a loving story. here, here's a story: you didn't have a cloud offering, you did, it sucked, now you have an allegedly better cloud offering.

gently caress you

it sounds like the problem is you do nerd poo poo for a living. owned. cspam bitch

# ? Feb 19, 2021 00:34

Lib and let die: Aug 26, 2004; Can't post for 7 hours!

some plague rats posted:

it sounds like the problem is you do nerd poo poo for a living. owned. cspam bitch

yeah i do

# ? Feb 19, 2021 00:38

Admiral Ray: May 17, 2014; Proud Musk and Dogecoin fanboy

Lib and let die posted:

if i have to hear another sales dick say that they need to "tell our story" i'm going to scream, and not even bother hitting the mute button.

you sell phone systems to insurance companies. there isn't a loving story. here, here's a story: you didn't have a cloud offering, you did, it sucked, now you have an allegedly better cloud offering.

gently caress you

that's a story

# ? Feb 19, 2021 00:48

Inspector Hound: Jul 14, 2003

ArmZ posted:

it could have been a pitching coach they have speed guns

Oh man then he could have run the bases, yes this would be better

# ? Feb 19, 2021 01:06

Fleetwood: Mar 26, 2010; biggest hochul head in china

galenanorth posted:

The first 20 minutes were the worst part of the movie because it ripped off too many jokes from social media and had too many pop culture references, and then it settled down into a much better movie when the rest stopped shoehorning those in. Except for the opening scene where Sonic was testing his speed using the cop's speed camera radar, the cop could've been any other occupation, like a home repairman (in keeping with the "town's fix-it-man and go-for guy" role), but Hollywood can't help but make every movie have a cop for a major character.

Cops can make great movie characters since they're walking contradictions (e.g. Mad Max, 48 Hrs) but the Sonic movie doesn't really do anything with it bc the setting is so idyllic

# ? Feb 19, 2021 01:13

Buddykins: Feb 12, 2011

twoday posted:

Buddykins : What's the premise of this thread?

George Costanza : I think I can sum up the thread for you in one word. Nothing.

Foo Diddley : Well, as I was saying, I would post as myself, as a former pizza cook, and I would make comments about stuff and talk about yardwork I've done, which is all true.

George Costanza : Yeah, but nothing happens in the thread. You see, it's just like life. You know, you eat, you go shopping, you read, you eat, you read, you go shopping.

Buddykins : All right, tell me about the stories. What kind of stories?

George Costanza : Oh, no. No stories.

Buddykins: No stories? So what is it?

George Costanza : What did you do today?

Buddykins : I got up and I snorted cocaine.

George Costanza : There's a thread. That's a thread.

Buddykins : How is that a thread?

Foo Diddley : Well, maybe something happens to you on the way to your dealer.

George Costanza : No, no, no! Nothing happens!

Buddykins : Well, why am I reading it?

George Costanza : Because it's on C-SPAM.

omg lmao

# ? Feb 19, 2021 04:59

Buddykins: Feb 12, 2011

galenanorth posted:

The first 20 minutes were the worst part of the movie because it ripped off too many jokes from social media and had too many pop culture references, and then it settled down into a much better movie when the rest stopped shoehorning those in. Except for the opening scene where Sonic was testing his speed using the cop's speed camera radar, the cop could've been any other occupation, like a home repairman (in keeping with the "town's fix-it-man and go-for guy" role), but Hollywood can't help but make every movie have a cop for a major character.

cops loving suck

# ? Feb 19, 2021 17:06

twoday: May 4, 2005; C-SPAM Times best-selling author

this is BULLSHIT

# ? Feb 19, 2021 20:31

spacemang_spliff: Nov 29, 2014; wide pickle

Foo Diddley posted:

yeah some dominos driver ran over a kid or some poo poo

lol fuckin dominoes

# ? Feb 19, 2021 20:39

spacemang_spliff: Nov 29, 2014; wide pickle

i mean that's not funny

# ? Feb 19, 2021 20:40

Buddykins: Feb 12, 2011

dominoes is good. love da brooklyn style baybee da best

# ? Feb 19, 2021 21:04

Iron Crowned: May 6, 2003; by Hand Knit

Buddykins posted:

dominoes is good. love da brooklyn style baybee da best

I can't remember the last time I ordered a pizza, I usually just get some take 'n bake from Aldi, or frozen.

I do have to say that Totino's Party Pizzas are great when you're drunk or high

# ? Feb 19, 2021 21:09

spacemang_spliff: Nov 29, 2014; wide pickle

I worked at dominos

all of the veggies come cut up in little baggies and all of the dough comes preportioned on plastic trays but that's probably pretty standard

we used to smoke weed in the walk in and then gently caress up people's orders lol

# ? Feb 19, 2021 21:10

ArmedZombie: Jun 6, 2004

twoday posted:

this is BULLSHIT

lol

# ? Feb 19, 2021 21:10

lumpentroll: Mar 4, 2020

ArmZ posted:

lol

# ? Feb 19, 2021 21:15

frankenfreak: Feb 16, 2007; I SCORED 85% ON A QUIZ ABOUT MONDAY NIGHT RAW AND ALL I GOT WAS THIS LOUSY TEXT

#bastionboogerbrigade

twoday posted:

this is BULLSHIT

it's one way of not having to deal with gdpr

# ? Feb 19, 2021 21:40

twoday: May 4, 2005; C-SPAM Times best-selling author

usually, at least on local american news sites, they put up a page that says something like "We value our foreign readers, but"

# ? Feb 19, 2021 21:44

frankenfreak: Feb 16, 2007; I SCORED 85% ON A QUIZ ABOUT MONDAY NIGHT RAW AND ALL I GOT WAS THIS LOUSY TEXT

#bastionboogerbrigade

twoday posted:

usually, at least on local american news sites, they put up a page that says something like "We value our foreign readers, but"

Well, Applebees doesn't.

# ? Feb 19, 2021 21:48

Buddykins: Feb 12, 2011

frankenfreak posted:

Well, Applebees doesn't.

# ? Feb 19, 2021 21:52

jarofpiss: May 16, 2009

twoday posted:

this is BULLSHIT

good

# ? Feb 19, 2021 21:54

jarofpiss: May 16, 2009

im looking at applebees.com right now and it's amazing

# ? Feb 19, 2021 21:55

jarofpiss: May 16, 2009

my water is turned off because a pipe burst from freezing but i can see applebees.com

# ? Feb 19, 2021 21:56

Iron Crowned: May 6, 2003; by Hand Knit

jarofpiss posted:

im looking at applebees.com right now and it's amazing

Holy poo poo! You aren't kidding!

# ? Feb 19, 2021 21:57

Lib and let die: Aug 26, 2004; Can't post for 7 hours!

twoday what did you do to piss off applebees?

# ? Feb 19, 2021 22:00

frankenfreak: Feb 16, 2007; I SCORED 85% ON A QUIZ ABOUT MONDAY NIGHT RAW AND ALL I GOT WAS THIS LOUSY TEXT

#bastionboogerbrigade

Lib and let die posted:

twoday what did you do to piss off applebees?

an internationally experienced Manhattan ad-man in charge of the website

# ? Feb 19, 2021 22:05

jarofpiss: May 16, 2009

edit that out don't let him see

# ? Feb 19, 2021 22:05

Lib and let die: Aug 26, 2004; Can't post for 7 hours!

frankenfreak posted:

an internationally experienced Manhattan ad-man in charge of the website

he's everywhere

# ? Feb 19, 2021 22:18

Smug Mug: Jul 21, 2011

jarofpiss posted:

im looking at applebees.com right now and it's amazing

seems normal on mobile...

ooh free delivery! I�m gonna order a bucket of slop for me and the mrs.

# ? Feb 20, 2021 00:20

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# ? Jun 2, 2024 12:07

hapsby: Oct 12, 2012; I just think this judgy rabbit makes a good av.

twoday posted:

Buddykins : What's the premise of this thread?

George Costanza : I think I can sum up the thread for you in one word. Nothing.

Foo Diddley : Well, as I was saying, I would post as myself, as a former pizza cook, and I would make comments about stuff and talk about yardwork I've done, which is all true.

George Costanza : Yeah, but nothing happens in the thread. You see, it's just like life. You know, you eat, you go shopping, you read, you eat, you read, you go shopping.

Buddykins : All right, tell me about the stories. What kind of stories?

George Costanza : Oh, no. No stories.

Buddykins: No stories? So what is it?

George Costanza : What did you do today?

Buddykins : I got up and I snorted cocaine.

George Costanza : There's a thread. That's a thread.

Buddykins : How is that a thread?

Foo Diddley : Well, maybe something happens to you on the way to your dealer.

George Costanza : No, no, no! Nothing happens!

Buddykins : Well, why am I reading it?

George Costanza : Because it's on C-SPAM.

i was gonna post witch hat piggy again but i'm giggling too har--ah gently caress it

# ? Feb 20, 2021 01:12

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > C-SPAM > [Malarkey Zone] fuck the malarkey and pay me you old fuck

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