|
Every day I lol about strangers' bad butthole discipline.
|
#
?
Apr 2, 2021 16:58
|
|
|
|
| # ? Jun 9, 2024 17:42 |
|
|
ClamdestineBoyster posted:They used to use old baguettes to wipe in France before Bill Bidet rode in on his horse with his immaculate, shining rear end in a top hat, the reflection causing many peasants to cover their eyes. He showed his invention to the dictator of france and their modesty was lost once everyone had a gleaming, squeaky rear end in a top hat, henceforth the “place in France where the naked ladies dance” 
|
|
#
?
Apr 2, 2021 16:59
|
|
|
Pretty good posted:Honestly lol at anyone who uses just paper without any actual washing. If you somehow got poo poo all over your hands would you just wipe it off with a napkin and carry on like that's fine???
|
|
#
?
Apr 2, 2021 17:17
|
|
|
AEMINAL posted:I envy you rich fuckin bidet owners. I got two bidets for $20 on some deal site. They aren't fancy ones that have a dryer or heater or anything but they work great. Powerjet of cold water up the old bumhole sure wakes a person up in the morning.
|
|
#
?
Apr 2, 2021 17:31
|
|
|
Pretty good posted:Honestly lol at anyone who uses just paper without any actual washing. If you somehow got poo poo all over your hands would you just wipe it off with a napkin and carry on like that's fine??? I mean washing is almost certainly better, yes, but it's not like you shake hands and open doors and scratch your nose and eat skittles with your b-hole I mean, most people don't
|
|
#
?
Apr 2, 2021 17:53
|
|
|
I used to relish taking shits at work. Getting paid to poop what a world!! Now anytime my timing doesn't work out and I poop at work instead of at home I'm annoyed cause at home I get a nice refreshing clean after. MY GIRLFRIEND tried it, but is a moron and just cranked it to full power and blasted the poo poo out of her rear end in a top hat and it hurt her so she's afraid to use it at all now.
|
|
#
?
Apr 2, 2021 18:05
|
|
|
$20?
|
|
#
?
Apr 2, 2021 18:39
|
|
|
The Fattest PI posted:I used to relish taking shits at work. Getting paid to poop what a world!! Sounds like a hell of a setup. Industrial pressure washer?
|
|
#
?
Apr 2, 2021 18:45
|
|
|
Whenever I take a poo poo in McDonald's I walk out of the stall, shove my rear end into the sink and wash out the bussy
|
|
#
?
Apr 2, 2021 18:52
|
|
|
I like bidets. But I am more excited about rear end vacuums.
|
|
#
?
Apr 2, 2021 18:53
|
|
|
I eat bioengineered plastic producing bacteria with every meal. They gather in my large intestine and create a thin plastic covering around my BM. Every log comes out fully encased and preserved, no wipes needed. I scoop it from the bowl directly into this week's capsule. Every Sunday afternoon I bury the capsule of preserved turds in ice and prepare a new capsule for the upcoming week.
|
|
#
?
Apr 2, 2021 19:16
|
|
|
Bad Purchase posted:I eat bioengineered plastic producing bacteria with every meal. They gather in my large intestine and create a thin plastic covering around my BM. Every log comes out fully encased and preserved, no wipes needed. I scoop it from the bowl directly into this week's capsule. Every Sunday afternoon I bury the capsule of preserved turds in ice and prepare a new capsule for the upcoming week. This is my dream
|
|
#
?
Apr 2, 2021 21:15
|
|
|
I take one dump a year, which has been compacted into a single diamond in my bowels, thus removing the need to wipe.
|
|
#
?
Apr 2, 2021 21:25
|
|
|
If you can make synthetic diamonds out of people why hasn't anyone made one out of poo poo as an artistic statement  gently caress nobody steal this, it's my ticket to high art
|
|
#
?
Apr 2, 2021 21:43
|
|
|
Pretty good posted:Honestly lol at anyone who uses just paper without any actual washing. If you somehow got poo poo all over your hands would you just wipe it off with a napkin and carry on like that's fine??? Yeah. Who cares? It's not a big deal.
|
|
#
?
Apr 2, 2021 21:48
|
|
|
Pretty good posted:Honestly lol at anyone who uses just paper without any actual washing. If you somehow got poo poo all over your hands would you just wipe it off with a napkin and carry on like that's fine??? I can still lick it clean, I'm not a drat animal
|
|
#
?
Apr 2, 2021 21:50
|
|
|
How big are you peoples bathrooms? If I decided to just go and buy a bidet where the gently caress am I supposed to put it? Don’t I need to get a plumber to do all the pipes to it or whatever? What the gently caress man
|
|
#
?
Apr 2, 2021 22:06
|
|
|
I don't understand bidets, every time I've used one there was still some toilet paper scrubbing needed, followed by a final rinse. Do people really manage to use these things without toilet paper or a brave bare hand?
|
|
#
?
Apr 2, 2021 22:11
|
|
|
Hey if you get doodoo on your hand, just reach further down into the bowl and a wash it off 
|
|
#
?
Apr 2, 2021 22:12
|
|
|
I wipe my rear end with a rag soaked in kerosene, as is tradition
|
|
#
?
Apr 2, 2021 22:12
|
|
|
I'm still skeptical about the towel situation I don't want to put a damp rear end back into my pants, and I don't want a shared rear end towel or a row of personalized rear end towels
|
|
#
?
Apr 2, 2021 22:14
|
|
|
worried about going to the movies alone, they wont let me into the showers unless i have a date after all
|
|
#
?
Apr 2, 2021 22:18
|
|
|
gbs but from 2004 posted:How big are you peoples bathrooms? If I decided to just go and buy a bidet where the gently caress am I supposed to put it? Don’t I need to get a plumber to do all the pipes to it or whatever? What the gently caress man It's just an attachment on your toilet under the seat. You unscrew the hose that sends water into your toilet tank and put a t-connector there so it goes to both the tank and the little spigot inside the toilet. We're not installing, like, a separate birdbath that you squat on Raskolnikov2089 posted:I don't understand bidets, every time I've used one there was still some toilet paper scrubbing needed, followed by a final rinse. mine is horrendously powerful, so all that is really needed afterward is a quick swipe with a little toilet paper to be sure I don't have swamp rear end
|
|
#
?
Apr 2, 2021 22:18
|
|
|
grown rear end adults on this web site cant figure out how to use a booty washer, and im here for it
|
|
#
?
Apr 2, 2021 22:21
|
|
|
You don't have to worry about swamp rear end when all you wear is a kilt 
|
|
#
?
Apr 2, 2021 22:28
|
|
|
Man I have a Bidet but I don't use it.. Tf is wrong with me
|
|
#
?
Apr 2, 2021 22:33
|
|
|
Paranoid Peanut posted:Man I have a Bidet but I don't use it.. Tf is wrong with me This is the literal definition of insanity.
|
|
#
?
Apr 2, 2021 22:37
|
|
|
Colonel Cancer posted:You don't have to worry about swamp rear end when all you wear is a kilt Then you have to worry about chafing
|
|
#
?
Apr 2, 2021 22:41
|
|
|
I enjoy having a bunghole so pristine that the virgin mary herself would be proud to eat off of it. Bidet 4 Lyf.
|
|
#
?
Apr 2, 2021 22:44
|
|
|
Modify your bidet to spray high ABV grain spirits instead of water, to clean and disinfect the site while also providing a relaxing buzz #lifehax
|
|
#
?
Apr 2, 2021 22:46
|
|
|
StarkRavingMad posted:It's just an attachment on your toilet under the seat. You unscrew the hose that sends water into your toilet tank and put a t-connector there so it goes to both the tank and the little spigot inside the toilet. We're not installing, like, a separate birdbath that you squat on Doesn't that just aerosolize concentrated shitwater better than flushing does?
|
|
#
?
Apr 2, 2021 22:50
|
|
|
Raskolnikov2089 posted:Doesn't that just aerosolize concentrated shitwater better than flushing does? you don't stand up to bidet my gigantic rear end is still sitting on the seat, keeping anything from aerosolizing anywhere but down the bowl while the spigot shoots a firehose-power torrent of ice water directly into my bunghole
|
|
#
?
Apr 2, 2021 22:55
|
|
|
Spend a little extra and get the ones where you can choose the spray pattern. The pulsating ones are delightfully refreshing
|
|
#
?
Apr 2, 2021 23:07
|
|
|
Raskolnikov2089 posted:Doesn't that just aerosolize concentrated shitwater better than flushing does? oh cool a grown up who makes decisions around irrelevant factoids meant to gross out children
|
|
#
?
Apr 2, 2021 23:28
|
|
|
so this is actually a diffrent brand than my previous one, and it cleans my butthole very efficiently. A++ would order again. Biobidet basic cheap model its like 25 bucks on amazon i think. [edit] yeah this is the kind i got too StarkRavingMad posted:It's just an attachment on your toilet under the seat. You unscrew the hose that sends water into your toilet tank and put a t-connector there so it goes to both the tank and the little spigot inside the toilet. We're not installing, like, a separate birdbath that you squat on Wendigee fucked around with this message at 00:09 on Apr 3, 2021 |
|
#
?
Apr 3, 2021 00:06
|
|
|
Some even have a nozzle for the ladies like mine. No idea if it does anything. Having a bidet does make you a bit more conscious of how you sit on the toilet. Nothing worse then spraying the cheek instead of the hole. Its like zeroing a gun in a way but sometimes you have to Kentucky windage it.
|
|
#
?
Apr 3, 2021 00:44
|
|
|
Somewhat relevent, I've sometime wondered, does "rear end-lotion" exist? Like, lotion you rub all up on your bunghole and inner cheeks, so it's all moisturized and supple
|
|
#
?
Apr 3, 2021 01:08
|
|
|
limp_cheese posted:Some even have a nozzle for the ladies like mine. No idea if it does anything. I tried the lady nozzle and it just kind of gently buffeted the back of my balls while also hammering my anus. Johnny Aztec posted:I've sometime wondered, does "rear end-lotion" exist? Like, lotion you rub all up on your bunghole and inner cheeks, so it's all moisturized and supple Eat greasier food, or maybe take olestra and your rear end will be self moisterizing.
|
|
#
?
Apr 3, 2021 01:27
|
|
|
Been thinkin' it over, and I'm gonna start powdering my bottom. It feels cleaner, it's refreshing. It's refreshing and nice to powder your fanny.
|
|
#
?
Apr 3, 2021 01:34
|
|
|
|
| # ? Jun 9, 2024 17:42 |
|
|
Johnny Aztec posted:Somewhat relevent, Yeah it's made by a company out of Kentucky I think
|
|
#
?
Apr 3, 2021 02:06
|
|
