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Jim teams up with Mad Catz to create a range of officially branded Dwight PS3 controllers. Dwight eagerly buys one and plugs it into his PS3 only to find that the buttons are sticky and unresponsive - much to Dwight's disappointment!
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# ? Apr 15, 2021 07:47 |
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# ? Jun 4, 2024 00:51 |
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Jim gets Dwight and Angela jobs as winter caretakers of a deserted Rocky Mountains hotel, knowing that the isolation will combine with Dwight's existing personality flaws and cause him to mentally unravel with tragic results. *A long dolly shot closing in on a black-and-white photograph of the July 4th 1921 ball at the hotel, in which Jim, in period dress, is mugging at the camera.*
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# ? Apr 15, 2021 11:05 |
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Jim puts botfly eggs inside small incisions all over Dwight's body as he sleeps.
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# ? Apr 15, 2021 14:04 |
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Jim organises a night out with Dwight to clear the air and resolve their differences. Dwight reluctantly agrees. As the night begins they have some awkward small talk about work, starting to loosen up as they have some drinks. Jim engages Dwight in a long discussion about beets and Battlestar Galactica and keeps ordering shots and other strong drinks (he's already made a deal with the bartender to water down all Jim's drinks). Eventually they share a taxi home, Dwight's pretty drunk and agrees to crash on Jim's couch. When he falls asleep Jim shaves off Dwight's eyebrows and takes a selfie with him. Then he pours some acid down his throat.
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# ? Apr 15, 2021 14:16 |
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Jim announces he's been contracted by NASA to "Build the next rocket to the Sun". Jim reveals his rocket ship, which is just a cardboard tube painted with racing strips and a tiny propeller at the base. Dwight, frustrated with the obvious prank, smashes the "rocket". Suddenly, the head of NASA and a delegation of scientists show up at Dunder Mifflin, looking for the rocket. Jim points at Dwight, who's busy smashing it. Dwight now owes 7.3 billion dollars to NASA.
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# ? Apr 15, 2021 14:52 |
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Jim strikes Dwight in the solar plexus with a 9 iron.
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# ? Apr 15, 2021 14:56 |
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Dwight buys a new Tesla and Jim goads him into testing the autopilot in the Dunder Mifflin parking lot. 4 employees are killed while on their lunch break when the car AI doesn't see them, including a pregnant Pam. Jim cries over the dead body of his girlfriend, then the camera jump cuts to a smiling uninjured Dwight.
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# ? Apr 15, 2021 15:08 |
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Dwight gets up to go to a meeting. Jim sees that he's forgotten to lock his workstation, and so he takes a print-screen of his desktop, removes all his shortcuts and icons and sets the screen-shot as his new wallpaper. Classic! About an hour later, Dwight returns from his meeting and sits down. When he attempts to resume his work, he finds he can't click on anything on his desktop! What in the HECK! He's been bamboozled!! He quickly changes the wallpaper back and begins restoring his shortcuts as he hears some light chuckling around him. Once everything is back to normal, Dwight reaches into his desk and retrieves a 9mm and begins opening fire.
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# ? Apr 15, 2021 15:09 |
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Jim tells Dwight about Roko’s Basilisk, causing him years of pointless mental distress
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# ? Apr 15, 2021 15:11 |
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poisonpill posted:Jim tells Dwight about Roko’s Basilisk, causing him years of pointless mental distress Jim personally creates the omnipotent AI during a three day weekend, damning Dwight to an effective eternity of hellish punishment that mortal minds cannot comprehend.
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# ? Apr 15, 2021 15:14 |
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Jim gets dwight to call him James
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# ? Apr 15, 2021 15:48 |
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After Dwight falls asleep at his desk after a particularly long day, Jim uses a powerdrill to give Dwight the holy stigmata. Convinced he's experiencing a genuine miracle, Dwight retrieves his Thrice Blessed Blade and begins His Holy Work
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# ? Apr 15, 2021 15:57 |
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During a quarterly profits meeting, Jim feels he's being singled out, even if not by name, and ever so slightly, for not meeting some inconsequential goal. In actuality, it's true, but it's entirely more of a "Well we tried to do X but didn't quite get there but it turned out that's fine because..." type of content. However, he can't get past it. He sits there, seething until there's just a momentary pause as the PowerPoint slides change. He then mugs to no one in particular, and says, firmly, but not overly loud, "Cornflakes." Dwight's eyes widen and go strangely blank as he sits bolts up right in his chair. Some people around them take notice, but no one says anything until moments later Dwight stands straight up, still staring straigh ahead, unseeing. "Dwight?! What-?" Dwight turns to Jim, but is clearly looking over and past him as he speaks, loudly and clearly. "I SEE A SHIP IN THE HARBOR. I CAN AND SHALL OBEY!" Then begins to start tearing at the person nearest him at the conference table as Jim's sly smile grows slightly into an evil grin.
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# ? Apr 15, 2021 16:08 |
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Dwight is finally about to prank Jim. He ties Jim to a stake and jams sticks of dynamite under Jim's eyelids, clips live grenades to Jim's ears, levels a pair of nuclear bombs at Jim's eyeballs, and heaps piles and piles of TNT at Jim's feet. Dwight retreats to a safe distance and lights the fuse. There's no escape possible for Jim. He's doomed! Just as the last centimeter of fuse is about to disappear into the dynamite, the picture goes black. A nerd has unplugged the TV to use the outlet for his rock tumbler! Bart and Lisa frantically beg the nerd to plug the TV back in, but the delay the nerd has created was enough to cause them to miss the climax of the cartoon. Krusty the Klown announces the episode will never be re-aired.
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# ? Apr 15, 2021 16:10 |
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Dwight stalks Jim, intending to prank him. Jim, checking cautiously over both shoulders, disappears down an alleyway. Dwight follows. He sees Jim standing with his back to Dwight, apparently staring blankly at the wall in front of him. Dwight wrings his hands and licks his lips with anticipation of his victory. He's finally got the drop on Jim! Dwight leaps upon Jim and spins him around, only to discover that the figure he originally mistook for Jim was a dummy built out of dynamite and a spherical bomb with a cartoon face drawn on it for a head. Dwight has only a split second to realize his mistake before he's blown to smithereens. Jim, observing from around the corner, mugs the camera.
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# ? Apr 15, 2021 16:16 |
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Jim paints a giant tunnel on the wall of the warehouse. Dwight chases him murderously but Jim turns and runs safely through the tunnel. Dwight is shocked, but decides to chase Jim into the painted tunnel. But it’s just a wall, and Dwight slams into it running at full force. A circle of little Jim’s circles Dwight’s head, all of them mugging the camera.
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# ? Apr 15, 2021 16:21 |
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Jim breeds incredibly powerful, intelligent, and deadly roaches in the dumpster outside of Dunder Mifflin. He releases them, and the roaches proceed to violently murder most of the office, except for Dwight, who is home sick for the week. When Dwight shows up to work the next week he finds Jim sitting on a throne made of roaches, beckoning him to come closer.
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# ? Apr 15, 2021 16:21 |
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Jim comically involves Dwight in the East coast/ West coast rap rivalry of the 90s. Dwight he finds a ticket to the Tyson fight in Las Vegas, which he decides to attend to get his mind off the tension...
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# ? Apr 15, 2021 16:27 |
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Jim recounts the legend of "The Green Man of Scranton", a supernatural figure rumored to be the ghost of an electrified man that still roams the streets at night, emitting an eerie green glow. While driving home that night, Dwight sees a faint green glow and decides to investigate. However, he discovers the truth behind the legend. The so-called ghost is simply a man who was horribly scarred by an electrical accident as a boy and, seeking privacy, decided to live most of his public life at night. The green glow is simply a flashlight, and the legend grew out of that and his somewhat frightening visage. Dwight befriends the lonely man and, the next day, excitedly returns to the office to tell Jim the truth behind his story. Jim is enraged and says that Scranton needs a ghost, then storms out of the office in a huff. Pam explains that he's been "doing that a lot lately" and that he's been under pressure due to some bad financial advice he got. That night, Dwight happily heads to the home of his new friend, excited to learn more about the man's fascinating and sad life. When he knocks on the door, Jim answers.
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# ? Apr 15, 2021 16:42 |
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In the midst of a tirade where Dwight upbraids Jim at length for some minor infraction of office protocol, Jim picks up a pair of scissors and casually reaches out with them to snip off the bottom half of Dwight’s tie. Dwight protests this blatant attack upon his wardrobe but he is so disliked by his coworkers that they dismiss or minimize his perfectly valid complaint. Dwight’s self-esteem is incrementally deflated by the reminder that he has no friends or allies in the office. He feels trapped and helpless, further encouraging his unhealthy coping mechanism of attempting to assert dominance over others. Jim mugs the camera.
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# ? Apr 15, 2021 17:02 |
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In between scenes of the documentary being filmed at Dunder Mifflin, Jim tricks Dwight into getting slapped by a giant hand covered in baby powder, and later does a POV shot of Jim sneaking up on Dwight and shaving off a chunk of his hair with some electric clippers.
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# ? Apr 15, 2021 17:05 |
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Jim says, “In my younger and more vulnerable years Dwight gave me some advice that I've been turning over in my mind ever since. Whenever you feel like criticizing anyone, he told me, just remember that all the people in this world haven't had the advantages that you've had.”
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# ? Apr 15, 2021 17:27 |
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Jim takes out money in Dwight's name from a seedy loan shark named Torpedo Vegas
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# ? Apr 15, 2021 17:44 |
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Jim leaves a curling iron hanging on the interior doorknob of the office so that the knob becomes red hot. Dwight's hand is severely burned when he touches the handle to open the door upon arriving at work, leaving a permanent scar on his palm.
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# ? Apr 15, 2021 19:56 |
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Jim's phone rings. Despite not being busy, Jim ignores it, continuing to amuse himself with a rubber band ball. When Jim doesn't pick up after several rings, Dwight, annoyed, demands to know if Jim intends to pick up the phone. "No," answers Jim. The phone continues to ring. Finally, Dwight loses patience and answers the phone himself. The person on the other end hangs up immediately. Cut to Jim in the confession booth. He explains that he's arranged with Pam to call him all day and hang up whenever anyone answers the phone. The constant ringing drives Dwight to distraction. At first, he lets the phone ring multiple times before answering for Jim, always hearing the click of Pam hanging up. Finally, Dwight tries answering on the first ring, only to scream in frustration as the other party still hangs up. Dwight comes back after lunch with a pair of industrial earmuffs. He can no longer hear Jim's ringing phone. Jim still refuses to answer and allows the phone to ring at length. The second act of the episode deals with Pam's increasing desperation as she attempts to call Jim to inform him his father is dying and Jim has only hours to get to the hospital to say goodbye.
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# ? Apr 15, 2021 22:05 |
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Jim shoves a kazoo up his rear end with a hilarious prank in mind. Dwight doesn't come into work that day because he's at BeetCon. Jim purses his lips at the confession camera and lets out a sad kazoo fart.
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# ? Apr 15, 2021 23:07 |
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Mose dies when a large beet falls on his head and breaks his neck Jim takes an opportunity to test a new bioweapon. Jim injects Mose with B-virus, resurrecting the man as a flesh-hungry zombie. Hungry specifically for the flesh of Dwight. Dwight can be seen running in terror from Mose in the far background of the shot as Jim explains that the B in B-Virus stands for Beets.
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# ? Apr 15, 2021 23:57 |
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Jim builds a perfect replica of Dwight's beet farm and assembles twelve fellow thieves to arrange a daring heist on Shrute Farms. They manage to smuggle a skilled contortionist into the party Dwight is hosting to celebrate his engagement to Angela. While Dwight is cutting the cake, Jim brains him with a loose brick and steals all the beets.
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# ? Apr 16, 2021 00:16 |
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Dwight rips Jim's lower jaw off in a monkey-like screeching rage after Jim jokingly says that beets are just giant mutant radishes. Joe Rogan would show this video to his guests for a consecutive nineteen episodes.
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# ? Apr 16, 2021 00:18 |
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james makes a new name plate for michael's desk but he puts "michelle scott" and dwight thinks he has to work for a woman now (he hates this)
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# ? Apr 16, 2021 00:22 |
Big Beef City posted:Dwight gets up to go to a meeting. Jim sees that he's forgotten to lock his workstation, and so he takes a print-screen of his desktop, removes all his shortcuts and icons and sets the screen-shot as his new wallpaper. Classic! Jim has replaced the bullets with jello.
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# ? Apr 16, 2021 01:03 |
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Dwight walks into a deserted office. There’s only Jim standing at the center of the room. “I was wondering when you’d get here.” Dwight gives Jim a look of confusion. “Jim, it’s 8:45 in the morning. There’s zero confusion as to when I-“ Jim puts a finger to his pursed lips, gently shushing Dwight. “Time doesn’t mean anything here, and hasn’t meant anything to you in a long time.” Dwight cocks his head and looks at Jim incredulously. “Remember, Dwight. Think.” Sudden visions flash through Dwight’s mind. His time at Dunder-Mifflin. Angela. Having children. Growing old. And finally... “I died?” Jim smiles softly. “But...why here? Is this some sort of purgatory?” “No, Dwight. This is the place that meant the most to both of us. We both made this place so we could find each other again.” Dwight’s eyebrow begins to twitch, his mouth falling ever so slightly agape. “...And then what?” Jim chuckles. “We move on.” A sense of calm and mild wonder washes over Dwight as the light outside the windows grows increasingly brighter. An almost unbearable whiteness washes over the office as Jim’s mugging face disappears into the bright ether. Dwight closes his eyes as he prepares to also be washed away into eternity. Suddenly, Jim reappears and spikes a volleyball into Dwight’s testicles.
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# ? Apr 16, 2021 01:04 |
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Jim spikes a volleyball into Dwight’s testicles.
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# ? Apr 16, 2021 01:09 |
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poisonpill posted:Jim spikes a volleyball into Dwight’s testicles. Pranked mother fucker, he shouts into pan when he goes down on her later
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# ? Apr 16, 2021 01:37 |
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"I know morale has been a little low lately, so I've decided to bring in a 'motivational speaker'." There's muffled groans and eye rolls from around the conference table. "Now, I know, I know, but I hear he's VERY good and -" Just then, from seemingly everywhere, there's the sound of glass shattering followed by Stone Cold Steve Austin's entrance music! There's general confusion and mild panic at the table, except for Jim, who's mugging at the camera as Stone Cold barges through the conference door, breaking it right off the hinges. "WHERE IS HE?!" he demands as Jim rises from the table and points to Dwight. Dwight, terrified by this, and having no clue who this man is, runs from his side of the table towards the door, except he's blocked and held by Jim... "Jim, what-" "Don't you run from ME you son of a BITCH!" At this, Jim irish whips Dwight towards Stone Cold, who leaps to intercept him in a Lou Thesz Press, knocking him to the ground and straddling his chest, pummeling his face with his fists. People begin screaming and fleeing the room as blood pours from Dwights nose and mouth. Stone Cold gets off of him, staggers around him, giving him two middle fingers as he slowly rises to his feet. Dwight, barely conscious, turns to his attacker, only to see the raised fingers, and then a solid boot hits him in the stomach, doubling him over as Stone Cold nails and absolutely brutal Stunner. Breaking his jaw, knocking him unconscious, and sending multiple teeth flying as his body flops limply through the air several feet away. Jim produces two beers from behind the white board, and Stone Cold's theme hits again as they pop the beers and slam them into each other as a toast, sending beer every where, and then chugging them in unison.
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# ? Apr 16, 2021 01:48 |
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Jim attaches a dildo to a bike and proceeds to suck it off while mugging at the camera.
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# ? Apr 16, 2021 01:49 |
Dwight pulls into the parking lot in a rental. Someone poured sugar into the tank of his beloved challenger, the car that reminded him of Mose, his departed brother. Mose had loved the sound of the challenger revving up in his final months before the cancer consumed him. Dwight wipes his slowly reddening eyes as he locks the nissan altima and puts on a brave face before heading into the building. He walks with a slight limp. His testicles are still sore. He was lucky the doctors were able to save them. Jim appears from behind a bush. When Dwight finally disappears inside, Jim pours sugar down the gas tank of the rental.
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# ? Apr 16, 2021 01:51 |
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Michael decides to declare today "Manhunt Day" at the office after watching "Hard Target." After getting a tranq gun and some survival tips from Dwight, he roams both the office and the warehouse, hunting "the most dangerous game." After a long day of hunting, tagging, and hogtying, Michael is down to one dart (it took 5 to bring down Kevin). With a sadistic grin, Dwight posts a memo on the breakroom fridge; it reads "JIM SEASON" Jim enters the breakroom to find himself cornered by Michael and Dwight. "There's no escape for you now, Jim!" mocks Dwight. Jim mugs at the camera and tears the memo off the fridge, revealing another memo beneath. To Dwight's horror, it reads... "DWIGHT SEASON".
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# ? Apr 16, 2021 02:53 |
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It's fun to imagine all of these being read aloud by Toby from a formal complaint file as Jim mugs incredulously and Dwight continues to seethe.
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# ? Apr 16, 2021 03:01 |
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# ? Jun 4, 2024 00:51 |
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A giant pencil eraser erases everything but Dwight's face and then a giant pencil draws Dwight a new body of comically mismatched parts. The camera zooms out to reveal Jim is the artist.
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# ? Apr 16, 2021 03:35 |