[succ] Go directly to the solutions tent, do not collect 600 dollars

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > C-SPAM > [succ] Go directly to the solutions tent, do not collect 600 dollars

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misadventurous: Jun 26, 2013; the wise gem bowed her head solemnly and spoke: "theres actually zero difference between good & bad quartzes. you imbecile. you fucking moron"

Bideo James posted:

JK Rowling had to retcon her books constantly on twitter and it drove her so insane she started hating the people she had to unofficially insert into her lore.

lore nerds turned her into a terf.

i only know this from listening to a reread podcast dunking on it (because gently caress ever reading those books again) but there�s a character in book 4 whose whole subplot is she�s transforming into a ladybug to spy on children and she�s introduced with extremely loaded language like �mannish hands�/lots of focusing on her �overly� feminine dress and makeup and i didn�t remember loving any of this but apparently she was absolutely a terf from the start and was just sneakier about it lol

# ? Apr 29, 2021 20:04

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? May 23, 2024 21:03

Mostly Lurking: Sep 25, 2008

Taffer posted:

why do these people tweet complete nonsense like this

https://twitter.com/FLOTUS/status/1387573999899656192

just do something!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XOf6HXPPeQ4

# ? Apr 29, 2021 20:05

Braggins: May 21, 2020; No, it's Braggins, not... dammit

https://www.peoplespolicyproject.org/2021/04/28/problems-with-bidens-american-family-plan/

# ? Apr 29, 2021 20:06

Bideo James: Oct 21, 2020; you'll have to ask someone else about the size of her cans

misadventurous posted:

i only know this from listening to a reread podcast dunking on it (because gently caress ever reading those books again) but there�s a character in book 4 whose whole subplot is she�s transforming into a ladybug to spy on children and she�s introduced with extremely loaded language like �mannish hands�/lots of focusing on her �overly� feminine dress and makeup and i didn�t remember loving any of this but apparently she was absolutely a terf from the start and was just sneakier about it lol

i never read any of the books so thanks for finding this lol

# ? Apr 29, 2021 20:07

Bideo James: Oct 21, 2020; you'll have to ask someone else about the size of her cans

@jkrowling hey can you make a wizard who self-sucks?

# ? Apr 29, 2021 20:07

World War Mammories: Aug 25, 2006

*waving wand* autofellatio

# ? Apr 29, 2021 20:12

Homeless Friend: Jul 16, 2007

Organ Fiend posted:

# ? Apr 29, 2021 20:13

mortons stork: Oct 13, 2012

Lux Animus posted:

Still can't get over what happened in Fate/Zero

what did happen in fate/zero? also, what is the reference?

# ? Apr 29, 2021 20:21

Eggplant Squire: Aug 14, 2003

Everyone loves girl King Arthur

# ? Apr 29, 2021 20:22

Zippy the Bummer: Dec 14, 2008; Silent Majority
The Don
LORD COMMANDER OF THE UKRAINIAN ARMED FORCES

Homeless Friend posted:

oh, that doesn't work

# ? Apr 29, 2021 20:24

Bideo James: Oct 21, 2020; you'll have to ask someone else about the size of her cans

World War Mammories posted:

*waving wand* autofellatio

# ? Apr 29, 2021 20:24

Yinlock: Oct 22, 2008

Yinlock posted:

So if China took Alaska, or Hawaii, should the US ignore it to avoid the end of industrial civilization?

The logical end point of such utilitarianism is absurdity, look at what happened in Fate/Zero; if you keep letting people on the boat with less people die; eventually you'll have no people left. If you keep letting China invade and take places because the alternative is "the end of industrial civilization" where does it end?

# ? Apr 29, 2021 20:25

Stairmaster: Jun 8, 2012

imho fate/zero is very bad and its cooler just to use your imagination and what tidbits fate/stay night gives you to decide what the fourth holy grail war looked like

# ? Apr 29, 2021 20:26

Homeless Friend: Jul 16, 2007

fate/brunch

# ? Apr 29, 2021 20:30

Stairmaster: Jun 8, 2012

Homeless Friend posted:

fate/brunch

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=emb66UNsr54

# ? Apr 29, 2021 20:31

is pepsi ok: Oct 23, 2002

Me: Hey so I know all the academic economists keep saying everything is going great, but honestly my life kinda sucks and so do the lives of everyone I know and also the country appears to be going to poo poo. Is it possible that economists are just stenographers for power?

D&D: You absolute dumbfuck, you tremendous loving idiot.

# ? Apr 29, 2021 20:39

Raiad: Feb 1, 2005; Without the law, there wouldn't be lawyers.

Lux Animus posted:

Still can't get over what happened in Fate/Gyro

# ? Apr 29, 2021 20:40

Lux Anima: Apr 17, 2016; Dinosaur Gum

is pepsi ok posted:

Me: Hey so I know all the academic economists keep saying everything is going great, but honestly my life kinda sucks and so do the lives of everyone I know and also the country appears to be going to poo poo. Is it possible that economists are just stenographers for power?

D&D: You absolute dumbfuck, you tremendous loving idiot.

Well actually it's cold over where I am, so checkmate global warming fraudsters!

Anyway if you're having budgeting problems because you chose the wrong career path or have severe mental issues why don't you ask your parents to buy you a house?

# ? Apr 29, 2021 20:46

Eggplant Squire: Aug 14, 2003

What can a house cost, $1400?

# ? Apr 29, 2021 20:47

mawarannahr: May 21, 2019

~~Jewish~~ Chinese/Cuban/Russian Space Lasers are making Americans sick

https://www.cnn.com/2021/04/29/politics/us-investigating-mysterious-directed-energy-attack-white-house/index.html posted:

US investigating possible mysterious directed energy attack near White House
Washington (CNN) � Federal agencies are investigating at least two possible incidents on US soil, including one near the White House in November of last year, that appear similar to mysterious, invisible attacks that have led to debilitating symptoms for dozens of US personnel abroad.

Multiple sources familiar with the matter tell CNN that while the Pentagon and other agencies probing the matter have reached no clear conclusions on what happened, the fact that such an attack might have taken place so close to the White House is particularly alarming.

Defense officials briefed lawmakers on the Senate and House Armed Services Committees on the matter earlier this month, including on the incident near the White House. That incident, which occurred near the Ellipse, the large oval lawn on the south side of the White House, sickened one National Security Council official, according to multiple current and former US officials and sources familiar with the matter.

In a separate 2019 episode, a White House official reported a similar attack while walking her dog in a Virginia suburb just outside Washington, GQ reported last year.

Those sickened reported similar symptoms to CIA and State Department personnel impacted overseas, and officials quickly began to investigate the incident as a possible "Havana syndrome" attack. That name refers to unexplained symptoms that US personnel in Cuba began experiencing in late 2016 -- a varying set of complaints that includes ear popping, vertigo, pounding headaches and nausea, sometimes accompanied by an unidentified "piercing directional noise."

Rumors have long swirled around Washington about similar incidents within the United States. While the recent episodes around Washington appear similar to the previous apparent attacks affecting diplomats, CIA officers and other US personnel serving in Cuba, Russia and China, investigators have not determined whether the puzzling incidents at home are connected to those that have occurred abroad or who may be behind them, sources tell CNN.

Defense officials who briefed lawmakers said it was possible Russia was behind the attacks, but they did not have enough information to say for sure. Another former US official involved in the investigation at the time said China was also among the suspects.

What we know about the possible 'sonic attacks' in Cuba and now China

The US has struggled to understand these attacks since 2016 and 2017, when diplomatic and intelligence personnel in Cuba first began reporting alarming symptoms that seemed to appear out of the blue. Intelligence and defense officials have been reluctant to speak publicly about the strange incidents, and some who were impacted have complained publicly that the CIA did not take the matter seriously enough, at least initially.

The attacks eventually led to a dramatic drawdown of staff at the outpost in Havana under the Trump administration. Personnel in Russia and China reported similar, unexplained incidents. Though there's no consensus as to what causes the symptoms, one State Department-sponsored study found they likely were the result of microwave energy attacks.

A 'bureaucratic power play'

Another mystery surrounding "Havana syndrome" is how the US government is confronting the problem. Among those investigating the mysterious pattern of possible attacks are the CIA, the State Department and the Defense Department.

Near the end of the Trump administration, the Pentagon sought to take the lead out of perceived frustration that other agencies were not doing enough to address the issue.

"I knew CIA and Department of State were not taking this sh*t seriously and we wanted to shame them into it by establishing our task force," Chris Miller, who was acting defense secretary at the time, told CNN last week.

Pentagon leaders set up the task force to track reports of such symptoms hitting Defense Department personnel overseas, an effort that Miller said was intended in part as a "bureaucratic power play" to force CIA and State to take the problem more seriously in their own personnel.

Miller said he began to see reports of these mysterious symptoms as a higher priority in December, after interviewing an alleged victim with extensive combat experience.

"When this officer came in and I knew his background and he explained in an extraordinarily detailed but more military style that I could understand, I was like this is actually for real," Miller said. "This kid had been in combat a bunch and he knew."

The CIA began its task force in December 2020, and expanded its efforts under new Director William Burns, who vowed during his confirmation hearings to review the evidence on the alleged attacks on CIA personnel overseas, which have long been publicly reported. The State Department named a senior official to lead the department's response to the "Havana syndrome" attacks in March.
The Defense Department's effort is thought to be among the most robust, potentially explaining why a defense official, rather than the intelligence community or the FBI, briefed lawmakers on the incident at the Ellipse, even though it took place on US soil.

Miller tapped Griffin Decker, a career civil servant from US Special Operations Command, to run the effort. Decker would track and verify reports in the military of what by then had become known informally as "Havana syndrome." Miller says Griffin would report a new case to him "every couple of weeks," although he cautioned that they were on the lookout for false reporting, psychosomatic episodes or hypochondria. Some of the cases they tracked included the children and dependents of Defense Department personnel overseas, Miller said.

Director of National Intelligence Avril Haines was asked about CNN's reporting by Sen. Jeanne Shaheen, a New Hampshire Democrat, at a Senate Armed Services Committee hearing on Thursday. Haines did not discuss the specifics but called the issue of the mysterious attacks "critically important" and added, "across the intelligence community, frankly, leaders are focused on this issue."

Haines also defended the classification of information related to the attacks but said members of Congress "should certainly have access to the classified information."

A White House spokesperson said in a statement, "The White House is working closely with departments and agencies to address unexplained health incidents and ensure the safety and security of Americans serving around the world. Given that we are still evaluating reported incidents and that we need to protect the privacy of individuals reporting incidents, we cannot provide or confirm specific details at this time."

Difficult to determine cause of symptoms

Decker and Jennifer Walsh, who was the acting under secretary of defense for policy, briefed House and Senate lawmakers over the last two weeks on the possible attacks, two sources familiar with the briefings told CNN. Politico first reported on the committee briefings.
In one incident that was investigated, Marines on a remote base in Syria developed flu-like symptoms shortly after a Russian helicopter flew over the base -- raising immediate concerns that it could be one of these strange attacks. But "it was quickly traced, where they had bad food and where no one else on the base had the same symptoms," said one former US official with knowledge of the incident. It was also determined by a defense physician that the symptoms had begun prior to the Russia patrol, a defense official told CNN.

The Syria episode highlights the difficulties that US officials face in trying to pin down what is and isn't an attack. The symptoms often vary, and officials still have no clear sense of how the unknown adversary is doing what it's doing. At least one former US official with knowledge of the matter said that investigators still haven't completely ruled out the possibility that the symptoms are caused by some kind of naturally occurring phenomenon rather than a weapon.

Another US defense official confirmed that the Pentagon's investigation is ongoing. The official would offer no details, but said, "We would not still be looking at this if we didn't have equities in it."

"There is nothing that the Secretary of Defense takes more seriously that the safety, health and welfare of our personnel serving around the globe in defense of our values and freedoms," Pentagon press secretary John Kirby said in a statement. "Any concerns on issues that call that into question are thoroughly reviewed, and the appropriate actions are taken to mitigate risks to our personnel."

A March report from the National Academy of Sciences found that "directed, pulsed radiofrequency energy" was the most likely cause of the strange set of symptoms. While the report was carefully written not to overstate its findings, it offered some of the clearest public evidence to date that the incidents could be attacks, attributing the afflictions to "pulsed" or "directed" energy.

Some personnel have been seriously injured from the alleged attacks, with at least one career CIA officer forced to retire last year and diagnosed with a traumatic brain injury.
This story has been updated with comments from the White House and also the Director of National Intelligence.

mawarannahr has issued a correction as of 20:59 on Apr 29, 2021

# ? Apr 29, 2021 20:48

fits my needs: Jan 1, 2011; Grimey Drawer

https://twitter.com/dougmillsnyt/status/1387852856754061317?s=20

# ? Apr 29, 2021 20:48

Yinlock: Oct 22, 2008

fits my needs posted:

https://twitter.com/dougmillsnyt/status/1387852856754061317?s=20

*slowly inflating a giant balloon labelled "WHO CARES"*

# ? Apr 29, 2021 20:50

Yinlock: Oct 22, 2008

is pepsi ok posted:

Me: Hey so I know all the academic economists keep saying everything is going great, but honestly my life kinda sucks and so do the lives of everyone I know and also the country appears to be going to poo poo. Is it possible that economists are just stenographers for power?

D&D: You absolute dumbfuck, you tremendous loving idiot.

if they're just saying whatever gets the rich the most money, then how did they get certified by those same rich people? you absolute dullard

# ? Apr 29, 2021 20:51

Xaris: Jul 25, 2006; Lucky there's a family guy
Lucky there's a man who positively can do
All the things that make us
Laugh and cry

is pepsi ok posted:

Me: Hey so I know all the academic economists keep saying everything is going great, but honestly my life kinda sucks and so do the lives of everyone I know and also the country appears to be going to poo poo. Is it possible that economists are just stenographers for power?

D&D: You absolute dumbfuck, you tremendous loving idiot.

hmm you seem unwell. have you considered, t h e r a p y?

# ? Apr 29, 2021 20:53

comedyblissoption: Mar 15, 2006

Wraith of J.O.I. posted:

it's so fuckin dumb like what is the endgame here, it's not like any of the china hawks want to bring back manufacturing en masse, it's just fuckin bonkers mate

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DS_yuGQtx0A

# ? Apr 29, 2021 20:54

Lux Anima: Apr 17, 2016; Dinosaur Gum

mawarannahr posted:

quote:
"I knew CIA and Department of State were not taking this sh*t seriously and we wanted to shame them into it by establishing our task force," Chris Miller, who was acting defense secretary at the time, told CNN last week.

Another great example of how bullying can work to establish task forces that don't work aside from keeping the grift going.

E: Thank you, acting defense secretary and new Chief of the Joint Task Force for Apprehending Bogeymen & Cryptids

Lux Anima has issued a correction as of 21:00 on Apr 29, 2021

# ? Apr 29, 2021 20:54

galenanorth: May 19, 2016

I overheard "this so-called 'Biden boom'" on CNN just now so I looked up https://duckduckgo.com/?t=ffab&q=%22biden+boom%22&iar=news&ia=news

and all it took was "opening 'er up"

# ? Apr 29, 2021 20:55

Cpt_Obvious: Jun 18, 2007

If your only metric for economic success is how much money the ultra wealthy have, then this is indeed a "Biden Boom".

# ? Apr 29, 2021 20:56

etalian: Mar 20, 2006

mawarannahr posted:

~~Jewish~~ Chinese/Cuban/Russian Space Lasers are making Americans sick

Thank you Comrade Xi!

# ? Apr 29, 2021 20:57

Pentecoastal Elites: Feb 27, 2007

mawarannahr posted:

~~Jewish~~ Chinese/Cuban/Russian Space Lasers are making Americans sick

destroying america with my morgellons beam

# ? Apr 29, 2021 21:07

sexpig by night: Sep 8, 2011; by Azathoth

the only 'biden boom' is in his goddamn underwear

# ? Apr 29, 2021 21:08

comedyblissoption: Mar 15, 2006

tiberion02 posted:

https://twitter.com/BanishedBernie/status/1387661706806145025
https://twitter.com/BanishedBernie/status/1387780394259451913

Enjoy, thread!

kyle is still wrong since he's assuming sincerity of the justice dems/squad lmao

# ? Apr 29, 2021 21:08

Smythe: Oct 12, 2003

mawarannahr posted:

~~Jewish~~ Chinese/Cuban/Russian Space Lasers are making Americans sick

its real. and its fabulous

# ? Apr 29, 2021 21:09

Yinlock: Oct 22, 2008

sexpig by night posted:

the only 'biden boom' is in his goddamn underwear

# ? Apr 29, 2021 21:11

Parity warning: Nov 1, 2009; 3rd Place, TRP Sack Race 2021/22

fits my needs posted:

https://twitter.com/AOC/status/1387589999307235328?s=20

https://twitter.com/ObamaFoundation/status/1386763627605135362?s=20

https://twitter.com/asnartwork4/status/1386369523482341378

# ? Apr 29, 2021 21:12

comedyblissoption: Mar 15, 2006

Ytlaya posted:

Occasionally I have this mental image where suddenly the doors bust open during a White House press conference or Biden speech or something and Trump comes in, dancing to the theme from the 90's Nickelodeon show "Guts" except instead of "Guts!" the song says "Trump!"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ymHzJTOErEM

# ? Apr 29, 2021 21:14

Willa Rogers: Mar 11, 2005

Excelzior posted:

the no-name vp that did nothing in her term (so far) and whose last presidential bid crashed and burned before a single vote was cast is a shoo-in to win in 2024

only in america

# ? Apr 29, 2021 21:15

Happiness: Oct 10, 2004

mortons stork posted:

what did happen in fate/zero? also, what is the reference?

the specific thing being referenced in the d&d post that this title came from is just an extremely dumb version of the trolley problem

https://imgur.com/gallery/8hquP

quote:

So if China took Alaska, or Hawaii, should the US ignore it to avoid the end of industrial civilization?

The logical end point of such utilitarianism is absurdity, look at what happened in Fate/Zero; if you keep letting people on the boat with less people die; eventually you'll have no people left. If you keep letting China invade and take places because the alternative is "the end of industrial civilization" where does it end?

# ? Apr 29, 2021 21:17

In Training: Jun 28, 2008

Xaris posted:

i read this zoomed out on a tiny font before chugging coffee and thought it said people making under 500,000 would get $2,000 a month and i was like huh that seems good. then i saw they were actually only giving it to 500,000 people and i was oh thats not great but they're piloting it so okay. and then i saw it was $170 a month, and then i saw it was going to come from 're-arranging' social and homeless services lmao

yeah its complete trash and i hope yang eats poo poo in the primary. if he wins the primary he's gonna lose to fuckin Curtis Sliwa lol.

# ? Apr 29, 2021 21:20

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? May 23, 2024 21:03

Parity warning: Nov 1, 2009; 3rd Place, TRP Sack Race 2021/22

guts owned and i'd defeat some lovely kids in an obstacle course today to get that sweet sweet nugget of aggro crag

# ? Apr 29, 2021 21:20

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > C-SPAM > [succ] Go directly to the solutions tent, do not collect 600 dollars

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