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You do realize you can set dating apps to find conservative men, right? LOL if you use toilet paper or bidets. Your pooper will GLISTEN with one easy step at a Wendy's bathroom.
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May 8, 2021 00:39
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May 8, 2021 00:39
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Cocaine Bear posted:Butt towel or TP. I just want to let you know that I am genuinely admiring this post. Like, seriously. This is a legitimately amazing post in this of all possible threads. After more than a full page of a derail about how Bidets Are Better and how people not using bidets are wasting money by buying toilet paper, you respond to someone telling you that a bidet alone makes their rear end wet by saying "yeah, I use toilet paper to dry off". This is top-notch comedy and I am absolutely here for it. Thank you.
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May 8, 2021 00:40
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SneezeOfTheDecade posted:You've turned your bidet into a religion 
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May 8, 2021 00:41
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butt...towel?
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May 8, 2021 00:43
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SneezeOfTheDecade posted:I just want to let you know that I am genuinely admiring this post. Like, seriously. This is a legitimately amazing post in this of all possible threads. Ah, you got me! Better go back to walking around with a poopy butthole! Crappy content:   
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May 8, 2021 00:46
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yeah I eat rear end posted:butt...towel?  Cocaine Bear posted:Ah, you got me! Better go back to walking around with a poopy butthole! Dude, I don't give the tiniest poo poo how you clean your rear end as long as you do it, you're the one telling everyone around you they're doing it wrong if they don't do it exactly the same way you do and enjoy it. Chill out. SneezeOfTheDecade has a new favorite as of 00:52 on May 8, 2021 |
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May 8, 2021 00:49
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yeah I eat rear end posted:butt...towel? Yeah friend it's totally normal to have a dedicated towel for dabbing your bhole It has its own hook and everything You don't even have to hide it from guests because when they ask you what the gently caress that poo poo-smeared waffle knit thing is hanging in your bathroom you can proselytize about that weird wand plumbed into your apartment toilet
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May 8, 2021 00:53
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SneezeOfTheDecade posted:I have used a bidet, multiple times, and I guarantee that you will tell me that I'm using it wrong when I say that every time I used it I walked around with a wet rear end for the next hour and felt filthy until the next time I went to the bathroom. You've turned your bidet into a religion and so your opinion can be discounted. If you're walking around with a wet rear end you are literally using it wrong. I don't know what else to tell you. Try wiping the water off?
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May 8, 2021 00:55
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Someone told me to use a bidet years ago and I thought it was stupid and raised all the points being raised here. I was dead wrong and eternally thankful for the goon that explained all this to me and prompted me to get one. Just trying to pass on the goodness; you don't have to take the advice but I'm not making this poo poo up for kicks or whatever. Do what you want, I'm just pointing out that there's a better way because I wish someone had for me sooner!
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May 8, 2021 01:00
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I've used a bidet a couple times and it feels like it took fewer wipes to get a dry rear end than to get a sufficiently clean rear end with just regular TP. That's my bidet story.
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May 8, 2021 01:01
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So maybe switch your message from "use a bidet instead of toilet paper" to "use a bidet before toilet paper" if you don't want people to make the same mistake I did, is all I'm saying.       
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May 8, 2021 01:04
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SneezeOfTheDecade posted:I just want to let you know that I am genuinely admiring this post. Like, seriously. This is a legitimately amazing post in this of all possible threads. I think the idea is that you wash your rear end in a top hat with water and then dry it with a bit of paper. Which is the same rationale for why you have a shower rather than just rubbing your entire body down with towels until it is clean. Like if I had a wet rear end I don't think I would need to be told to dry my rear end.
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May 8, 2021 01:05
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My dude you're saying that simply because no one explicitly told you to dry yourself off after getting wet you had no loving choice but to wander around wet for hours. Do you need people to remind you to loving swallow when they offer you a bite of their food too? I don't think other people are the problem here.
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May 8, 2021 01:07
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I don't know about you guys but I kind of thought the dirty rear end in a top hat problem has been solved for a few years now without having an rear end fountain installed I mean I have not had a dirty rear end in a top hat issue in my life but that might be my privilege showing
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May 8, 2021 01:08
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I don't have a bath room big enough to install a bidet that's how utterly terrible i am sorry privileged bathroom bigger than 5 m x 2. m (guessing here) havers it's basically like a toilet cubicle only it's a tiny room that seems to have been installed in whatever space was left. I think they just forgot until the last minute. Regarde Aduck has a new favorite as of 01:13 on May 8, 2021 |
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May 8, 2021 01:10
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Regarde Aduck posted:I don't have a bath room big enough to install a bidet that's how utterly terrible i am Installs over your toilet. Costs $40 and they're very easy to install. I posted one above but Luxe 110 or whatever base model is a good way to go. Here: https://luxebidet.com/product/neo-120-bidet-attachment/
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May 8, 2021 01:12
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bike tory posted:My dude you're saying that simply because no one explicitly told you to dry yourself off after getting wet you had no loving choice but to wander around wet for hours. Do you need people to remind you to loving swallow when they offer you a bite of their food too? I have never, even once, claimed to be anything other than a very dumb person. When people say "try a bidet instead of toilet paper, toilet paper users are losers" I take them at their word and assume that they just enjoy walking around with a wet rear end.
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May 8, 2021 01:13
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Cocaine Bear posted:Installs over your toilet. Costs $40 and they're very easy to install. I posted one above but Luxe 110 or whatever base model is a good way to go. What? See science has stagnated but development continues at breakneck pace. This changes everything.
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May 8, 2021 01:13
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Bidets are the kind of thing where maybe they work but bidet people get real weird about it and want to talk about it all the time and I don't like talking about it. keep it between your self and god i say
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May 8, 2021 01:14
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SneezeOfTheDecade posted:I have never, even once, claimed to be anything other than a very dumb person. When people say "try a bidet instead of toilet paper, toilet paper users are losers" I take them at their word and assume that they just enjoy walking around with a wet rear end. You can use TP but you don't have to. Twerk and drip dry or butt towel. And if you do use TP, it's a lot less (cleaning water off the floor vs cleaning poo poo off the floor). I'm sorry if I come off abrasive, but I'm trying to give good advice to help improve lives. I hope my poo poo posting doesn't dissuade you from being more hygienic, less wasteful, and happier 
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May 8, 2021 01:17
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Cocaine Bear posted:You can use TP but you don't have to. Twerk and drip dry or butt towel. And if you do use TP, it's a lot less (cleaning water off the floor vs cleaning poo poo off the floor). Hey, like in the r/relationships thread, I learned something today, and I'm never going to complain about that. I just honestly thought the "use a bidet, not TP!" "why are you using a bidet without TP" shift was funny. 
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May 8, 2021 01:19
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y7QZgH1eP2o
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May 8, 2021 01:20
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Manager Hoyden posted:I don't know about you guys but I kind of thought the dirty rear end in a top hat problem has been solved for a few years now without having an rear end fountain installed If someone dropped a turd on your floor would you wipe it up with just toilet paper or would you get some moisture in the mix to at some point to make sure there wasn’t any residue?
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May 8, 2021 01:21
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ok bidets are good and cool can we get back to some extremely specific memes now please        
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May 8, 2021 01:23
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 I take solace in this.      
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May 8, 2021 01:28
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The 200th anniversary of Napoleon's death was two days ago and went entirely unheralded.
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May 8, 2021 01:29
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cowboy
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I bought this book from the Scholastic Book Fair in junior high a quarter century ago.
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May 8, 2021 01:34
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I've been saying this for years!
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May 8, 2021 01:35
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SneezeOfTheDecade posted:So maybe switch your message from "use a bidet instead of toilet paper" to "use a bidet before toilet paper" if you don't want people to make the same mistake I did, is all I'm saying. LOL, or Bigfoot 
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May 8, 2021 01:43
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 Shut the gently caress up about your assholes oh my god. Just shut up we get it.
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May 8, 2021 01:53
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May 8, 2021 02:06
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https://va.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_qqg2czFPeP1xrpgtp.mp4
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May 8, 2021 02:06
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I'm attracted to Jon Arbuckle. Help
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May 8, 2021 02:07
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Cocaine Bear posted:You can use TP but you don't have to. Twerk and drip dry or butt towel. And if you do use TP, it's a lot less (cleaning water off the floor vs cleaning poo poo off the floor). I am deeply in awe of the memes thread for showing me exactly how passionate people are about bidets Also some of them come with dryer functions so that's cool https://www.kogan.com/au/buy/kogan-smart-wash-dry-electric-bidet-toilet-seat/
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May 8, 2021 02:07
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I don't like how much Sisyphus matches my current experience.
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May 8, 2021 02:08
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May 8, 2021 02:27
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Boomer Sisyphus painstakingly types their Netflix username and password into their TV, navigating the on screen keyboard with the remote. Each time they hit log in it fails and the form clears. They start again. The TV is not connected to the internet. Millennial Sisyphus on the other end of the tech support line asks them once again to check that their computer is connected to the wifi network and that their browser window shows the correct login page for the router. Boomer Sisyphus assures Millennial Sisyphus they are.
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May 8, 2021 02:38
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Lol, loving lubbers
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May 8, 2021 02:39
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May 8, 2021 03:03
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