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Yeah, any dude that says he can confidently kill bare-handed anything larger than a ferret is a fool and soon a corpse.
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May 15, 2021 05:56
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John Murdoch posted:Both fighting bare/bear handed so it must be a fair fight. 
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May 15, 2021 05:57
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Stexils posted:i really want to hear those 13 peoples thoughts on how exactly they would win a fistfight against a grizzly bear https://youtu.be/Z29qvp5QHy4
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May 15, 2021 05:58
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Mr. Crow posted:It's pretty easy how do you think they catch salmon? Oh he did that bear dirty, goddamn  .
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May 15, 2021 06:03
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In 2005 a 73 year old farmer in Kenya was attacked by a leopard and he managed to kill it by shoving his hand down its throat, grabbing its tongue and choking it to death. Of course a dude who has been working the land in Africa for 50+ years probably has muscle density like aged oak so he'd be in an entirely different league than pudgy First World dudes
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May 15, 2021 07:36
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Didn't a woman in the US do the same to a mountain lion? Albeit she died later.
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May 15, 2021 07:48
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A dude strangled one and survived, which is loving badass.
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May 15, 2021 07:56
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Humans do have extraordinary stamina, agility and coordination, so they can take down animals with a choke hold that they have no right winning against. Even then you'd need a lot of luck and strength and odds are still on you'd get torn to shreds. How the gently caress those guys think they're going to pull that off against an elephant is bewildering though.
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May 15, 2021 07:57
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Bug Squash posted:Humans do have extraordinary stamina, agility and coordination, so they can take down animals with a choke hold that they have no right winning against. Even then you'd need a lot of luck and strength and odds are still on you'd get torn to shreds. A patient gamer with knuckle dusters, an elephants worst nightmare.
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May 15, 2021 08:01
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Cartoon Man posted:https://i.imgur.com/kIvfFxr.mp4 https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Jeff%27s%20Kiss
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May 15, 2021 08:05
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Bug Squash posted:How the gently caress those guys think they're going to pull that off against an elephant is bewildering though. Elephants can flip cars with ease, it really is bewildering https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XMqUSHSKOeE
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May 15, 2021 08:21
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We know you can beat a kangaroo pretty easily
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May 15, 2021 08:25
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Bug Squash posted:Humans do have extraordinary stamina, agility and coordination, so they can take down animals with a choke hold that they have no right winning against. Even then you'd need a lot of luck and strength and odds are still on you'd get torn to shreds. A wild big cat attacking a human can also happen because the animal is somehow sick or crippled and can't catch faster game. Even then I would always bet on the cat even if it was trying to eat Chuck Norris.
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May 15, 2021 08:33
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WithoutTheFezOn posted:Pointing out the bear is easy. A chimp will gouge out your eyes and bite off your nose and genitals. https://www.esquire.com/news-politics/a5609/chimpanzee-attack-0409/
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May 15, 2021 08:34
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mobby_6kl posted:We know you can beat a kangaroo pretty easily The only reason that guy got away with it was that the kangaroo was utterly incredulous that anyone would dare step to it. In the full video you can see the guy, an experienced bushman, exit stage left before the kangaroo can get over the shock of the situation.
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May 15, 2021 08:34
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I8R50nvv5gc I may be reposting this, but it’s a good video.
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May 15, 2021 08:39
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Memento posted:The only reason that guy got away with it was that the kangaroo was utterly incredulous that anyone would dare step to it. In the full video you can see the guy, an experienced bushman, exit stage left before the kangaroo can get over the shock of the situation. Yeah those swoleroos can get pretty ridiculous 
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May 15, 2021 09:16
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Fighting animals barehanded is a lot like fighting humans barehanded; there's a good chance of an at best Pyrrhic victory and the smart thing for both is to run away.
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May 15, 2021 09:37
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The chimp is easily the most underrated animal on that list. Having seen an alpha chimp decide another chimp was on his poo poo list, there's just no way a human is surviving. I think those 25% of men have a mental image that's a juvenile female, since those are the ones that usually get filmed on TV since they are less likely to go kill crazy if slighted. King Cobra is most overrated. Just loving grab it's tail and whip that idiot against a tree.
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May 15, 2021 10:22
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I remember seeing the description of a video that was something "male chimps fight for supremacy winner eats then kills the loser" and I tell you this for free my Goons, I did not watch that video.
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May 15, 2021 10:24
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Memento posted:I remember seeing the description of a video that was something "male chimps fight for supremacy winner eats then kills the loser" and I tell you this for free my Goons, I did not watch that video.
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May 15, 2021 10:40
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canyoneer posted:A chimp will gouge out your eyes and bite off your nose and genitals. Article is behind a paywall but why does the link have it listed under "politics"?
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May 15, 2021 11:14
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BiggerBoat posted:Article is behind a paywall but why does the link have it listed under "politics"? My good friend have you heard the word of bypass paywalls addon for chrome / firefox?
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May 15, 2021 11:26
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I'm pretty sure throwing your own poo poo at most animals would give you the element of surprise, then its just bam...
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May 15, 2021 12:18
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https://i.imgur.com/KLGgRUi.mp4
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May 15, 2021 12:27
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BiggerBoat posted:Article is behind a paywall but why does the link have it listed under "politics"? Who said it has to be human politics?
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May 15, 2021 12:34
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Memento posted:I remember seeing the description of a video that was something "male chimps fight for supremacy winner eats then kills the loser" and I tell you this for free my Goons, I did not watch that video. "eats then kills" is some mega bad vibes
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May 15, 2021 12:36
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Tree Bucket posted:"eats then kills" is some mega bad vibes Yeah, I wouldn't have watched it either way, but the description itself was incredibly cursed.
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May 15, 2021 12:45
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Chimpanzees I wouldn't fight but I could take down at least one of the Monkees or Gorillaz.
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May 15, 2021 13:44
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I bet some if those guys saw Empire and figured that's how they'd beat an elephant.
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May 15, 2021 13:53
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kdrudy posted:I bet some if those guys saw Empire and figured that's how they'd beat an elephant. Oh man, I remember that. Taraji P. Henson hosed that elephant up.
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May 15, 2021 13:56
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Bug Squash posted:King Cobra is most overrated. Just loving grab it's tail and whip that idiot against a tree. Calling a dangerous snake an idiot is giving me a real severe case of the giggles this morning. Thank you. All I can picture is some dude standing there taunting the snake. What're you gonna do you idiot? Get a load of this big fat stupid noodle, what a moron. Man bitten by snake: What are you gonna do, bite me?
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May 15, 2021 14:26
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https://twitter.com/met_egyptianart/status/1393250201687711749?s=20
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May 15, 2021 14:39
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Bug Squash posted:How the gently caress those guys think they're going to pull that off against an elephant is bewildering though. Beating an elephant is pretty simple really, you just have to do it one punch at a time.
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May 15, 2021 14:40
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May 15, 2021 14:43
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Macdeo Lurjtux posted:Beating an elephant is pretty simple really, you just have to do it one punch at a time. The problem with fighting an elephant is you potentially wind up with Tony Jaa coming to kick your rear end in revenge afterwards even if you win/survive.
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May 15, 2021 14:47
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May 15, 2021 15:46
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Bug Squash posted:The chimp is easily the most underrated animal on that list. Having seen an alpha chimp decide another chimp was on his poo poo list, there's just no way a human is surviving. I think those 25% of men have a mental image that's a juvenile female, since those are the ones that usually get filmed on TV since they are less likely to go kill crazy if slighted. Relevant story: my parents are friends with an eccentric elderly couple who used to keep a chimp as a pet (in the 1970s). Unfortunately baby chimp grew into an adult male and was jealous of the husband, and he attacked the husband. In an instinctive reaction, the husband bit back before they rushed off to the hospital to get the husband's bite wound treated. When they came back home, the chimp was dead on the floor, presumably from the septic shock induced by the human bite.
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May 15, 2021 15:48
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Who died?
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May 15, 2021 16:01
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Velocity Raptor posted:He used a kettle to pay for his pot.
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May 15, 2021 16:15
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