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Dwight comes in to work to find his stapler encased in jello. Incensed, he grabs the stapler and strikes Jim with it, hard, on the side of his jaw. Jim falls to the floor, stunned. Dwight gets on top of Jim and continues beating his face mercilessly with the stapler. Dwight lands a blow between Jim's ear and jawbone, there is an unnatural hissing sound and a loud click. Jim's face hinges forward from his head, looking now like a silicone cast of a face. Steam erupts from the widening gap and we see many small metal levers and indicators surrounding a small silver throne. On each side of the throne are two tabs like speakers, or perhaps headrests for the strange creature inside. A small humanoid with a bulbous head and not much else looks up at Dwight with large, dazed eyes. "An Arquilian Prince!" whispers Dwight, as his hand slowly releases the stapler in amazement, and it drops to the floor. Dwight gets off the Jim body and kneels. "I'm sorry my lord, I did not know it was you. I promise that the citizens of Earth mean you no harm". "The Galaxy must be protected" the prince says, between desperate, weak breaths. "The galaxy, lord?" Dwight responds, confused. "The galaxy.. is on.. Orions.. belt.." The last words of the alien prince echo in Dwights head for weeks as he tries to solve the mystery. Orion ends up being a hairy bear of a man wearing only leather belts that Dwight meets at a bar. After 5 hours solid of rough and exhausting lovemaking, the man gives Dwight a marble that, impossibly, can be seen to contain an entire Galaxy. Dwight is so entranced he forgets his pants and walks home, cum dribbling out his anus for the entirety of the trip. The camera zooms out past Saturn, leaving the solar system and revealing the milky way, which a naked and extremely well endowed Jim has just won in a game of marbles.
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May 19, 2021 17:25
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| # ? Jun 3, 2024 21:47 |
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Dwight has just closed an important sale. He's spent weeks in meetings and negotiations, but it was worth it. The proceeds from this sale will keep Dunder Mifflin in the black clear through the next quarter, and the commission from such a large sale will ensure Dwight's financial stability for some time. As Dwight is shaking hands with the extremely wealthy customer, the customer's hand pops right off at the wrist! Dwight gapes, horrified, at the sight, stammering an apology. The customer starts to laugh and pulls off a mask to reveal he was Jim all along! The sale was never real, it was just a prank! Dwight's just wasted weeks of work and so has Jim. There's no time left in the quarter for Dwight to meet his quota. Jim mugs the camera as Dwight rages.
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May 19, 2021 18:05
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Applewhite posted:Jim stacks all the desks in the office in a big pyramid. Dwight notices his computer and phone wedged in a nook at the base. Dwight’s phone starts to ring and he crawls into the nook to answer. Jim takes the opportunity to entomb Dwight alive in the desk pyramid. Dwight is buried for 1000 years. 100 years later explorers uncover the buried Dwight who is still alive and says, "Aaahhhh! After 100 years Im finally free! It's time to conquer Scranton!" Cut to Jim who is now an enormous floating head in an even more gigantic tube. "Alph-pam, Dwight has escaped!" He says urgently to what is clearly a disgruntled Pam in a cheap plastic robot suit. "Recruit a team of paper salesmen with attitude!" Go go Dunder-Mifflin Rangers! *bweer-neer-neer-neerneer!* Go go Dunder-Mifflin Rangers! *bweer-neer-neer-neerneer!*
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May 19, 2021 18:17
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Dwight grabs his lunch bag from the fridge and opens it. Canned snakes stream out, littering the floor. Jim walks in, licking his lips after having just eaten Dwight's lunch. "I didn't even like it," he says, grinning. Without warning, the joke snakes begin to writhe and twist. They were real the entire time, and begin to multiply on the ground. The entire break room is littered with snakes, all of them sliding and slithering over each other, until they are ankle-deep. The snakes keep multiplying and dividing, growing more gruesome as their divisions begin to work imperfectly; some snakes have two heads, others are balls of snake tails, but the hissing and thrumming of scale sliding on scale drowns out all else. The snakes spread out across the entire office and fill the entire floor knee-deep. People start to run and scream, trudging through the mutated pool of snake viscera. The snake mutations are becoming bizarre now, the snakes are now large and small, some have their guts hanging out, others are just pools of bloody mush. Dwight ensures that everyone makes it out safely, including the overflow annex, and makes his own way out of the room. The snakes are now up to his waist, and their rhythmic hissing has taken on the aura of a song, or some kind of chant. Dwight can almost swear that he sees in one of the mutated snake heads, a smirking Jim, before he slams shut the door and makes his way out.
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May 19, 2021 18:17
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After failing to conquer Scranton Michael appears. He has no skin and his exposed musculature his held down with a metallic gimp suit. His face is covered by a skull-like mask that leaves his brain dangerously exposed. At first Michael banishes Dwight and tries to conquer Scranton himself, but is also repeatedly defeated by the Dunder-Mifflin Rangers. Finally he and Dwight team up and then eventually marry.
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May 19, 2021 18:21
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Jim teaches Dwight a new way to pleasure himself which he calls "beeting off" causing Dwight to be banned from the pool.
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May 19, 2021 23:43
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Jim, being crafty, secretly reposts pranks from earlier pages of the thread that others had originally posted. Jim claims the credit for himself. Much to Dwight's chagrin, Jim intersperses them with original content to make it more difficult for this to be detected.
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May 20, 2021 02:25
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Jim replaces all of Dwight’s red beets with yellow beets.
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May 20, 2021 02:27
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Dignity Van Houten posted:Jim, being crafty, secretly reposts pranks from earlier pages of the thread that others had originally posted. Jim claims the credit for himself. Much to Dwight's chagrin, Jim intersperses them with original content to make it more difficult for this to be detected. All of this has happened before, and all of it will happen again.
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May 20, 2021 02:28
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This thread is 40x40 Jim pranks. There's bound to be some repeats. Jim traps Dwight in an infinite time loop.
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May 20, 2021 02:41
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Dignity Van Houten posted:Jim, being crafty, secretly reposts pranks from earlier pages of the thread that others had originally posted. Jim claims the credit for himself. Much to Dwight's chagrin, Jim intersperses them with original content to make it more difficult for this to be detected. Now I'm afraid I did this without realizing.
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May 20, 2021 02:42
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Ventral EggSac posted:Now I'm afraid I did this without realizing. I posted "Jim puts Dwights stapler in his rear end" and I would be utterly shocked if I wasn't the 6th or 7th person to do so
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May 20, 2021 03:51
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Jim gets up and goes to the break room. Dwight pays him no mind. Jim enters the office though the front door, says hi to Pam, and sits at his desk. After a few minutes, Jim gets up and goes to the break room. Dwight glances at him, but pays him no mind. Again, Jim enters the front door, says hi to Pam and sits down at his desk. Dwight now pays attention to Jim. After a few minutes, the cycle continues again: Jim gets up, walks the same way to the break room, and enters using the front door. Finally, after about 45 minutes of this continuing, Dwight follows Jim into the break room to see how he's doing this. Once he enters the annex, however, the lights turn off to pitch blackness. A candle lights, and Jim's face is seen in the soft glow. Soon multiple candles light, each one revealing Jim. Dwight is surrounded by Jims, each in a red robe! They begin chanting softly, and Dwight looks terrified. The chanting grows louder and louder. inferius beetus dominae the Jims shout, until suddenly behind Dwight, an anthropomorphic beet rises from the ground! Dwight spins around as its two beety little hands grab him and begin to drag him down, all while Dwight is screaming. The ritual is interrupted by Michael turning on the lights. Upon seeing the scene, he orders everyone into the conference room in five minutes. Dwight, half stuck in the floor, protests and Michael lets him miss the meeting. In the conference room, Michael berates the staff for using company time for demonic vegetable summoning rituals while the Jims mug at the camera in unison.
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May 20, 2021 04:02
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Jim disappears mysteriously. Despondent, Pam gives up on herself and marries Toby. Jim left Pam his parents' house in his will. One day while the pair are moving in and renovating, Toby cuts his hand and spills some blood on the floor. Within a day Jim has reconstituted as a wet, slimy skinless meat man. He convinces Pam to keep him a secret from Toby, as they begin to lure men from the Office home and murder them to heal Jim's flayed body. One day Angela has been lured in by a phone call from Dwight, only to find that his clothes are weirdly wet and his skin doesn't seem to fit. As chains emerge from the walls to hook and mangle Dwight's body Jim mugs at the camera-- "Bears. Beets. Battlestar Galatica." His body is ripped to shreds.
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May 20, 2021 04:17
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At the office Fourth of July party, Jim gets drunk and hits on Angela. It is unclear if this is a prank or not.
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May 20, 2021 04:28
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At the office Fourth of July party, Jim gets drunk and hits Angela. It is unclear if this is a prank or not.
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May 20, 2021 04:48
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Jim goes back in time to season one and takes the place of his past self, then copies every single word Dwight says for the rest of the show’s run.
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May 20, 2021 04:59
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Jim dresses as Captain Planet for Halloween and gives out the various Power rings to his co-workers. Dwight gets 'Heart'.
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May 20, 2021 05:28
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Dwight and Oscar bond over a shared love of the Ninja Turtles, which enrages Jim. One day, Jim arrives at work saying that he met "The real Ninja Turtles" and Dwight dismisses him as usual. Dwight continues with his day but Jim is constantly talking about meeting actual mutant ninja turtles, and Dwight finally tells him to either prove it or shut up. Jim, crying, runs out of the office and drives home. Pam tells everyone that Jim has been struggling lately with feeling unwanted at work, and only wanted to fit in with Dwight and Oscar. Feeling awful, Dwight drives to Jim's house and is instantly hit with an awful smell, like an open sewer. The front door is unlocked and Dwight pushes it open, finding stagnant water pooling all over the house. He looks to the kitchen and sees the sink is turned on. The ceiling is dripping and looks to be in danger of caving in from water damage. Dwight cautiously calls for Jim. "RADICAL, DUDE!" Dwight turns towards the noise and sees Jim dressed in an undersized Michaelangelo Halloween costume, wielding dual nunchaku. "UH OH, THE FOOT CLAN IS HERE. THAT'S TOTALLY BOGUS!" Jim swings his weapon at Dwight's head and it connects with a dull thud. Dwight is knocked to the ground and feels woozy. "HEY TURTLE BROS, LET'S SHOW THE SHREDDER WHAT WE THINK OF HIS GOONS!" From out of the dining room come three shambling figures. Dwight realizes that these are Jim's "real Ninja Turtles" - 3 former human beings that Jim has turned into monsters. Wooden "turtle shells" are bolted to their backs, Dwight can see where infection is already setting in and dried blood and pus has crusted. They've been spray painted green and Dwight sees the tell-tale scars of a lobotomy on each one. One of them wearing a blue headband raises his sword into the air awkwardly. Dwight realizes he should have expected this. It's pretty much exactly what happened when he and Stanley started playing Pokemon Go. "TURTLE POWER!" Jim screeches as the sword is brought down on Dwight. He then mugs for the camera and gives a thumbs up while his "brothers" howl and moan.
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May 20, 2021 15:38
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Michael's mysterious Egg of the King activates during a solar eclipse during which David announces Michael is fired without severance. Demons eat the entire Office. Jim mugs at the camera.
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May 20, 2021 15:44
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Jim looks up from his book that he's reading in bed and chuckles to himself, remembering all the pranks of years past. The jello stapler, the vampire, telling Dwight that he's hosting a surprise party for Michael when it was actually just a party he wanted to host without Michael. But this, this was his ultimate prank. Getting down on one knee, asking to marry him. The wedding they shared, the honeymoon of passion. Two kids, a beautiful house. It's Jim's dream come to life. He looks over at Dwight, softly snoring through his CPAP machine. I'll tell him it's a prank tomorrow he thinks to himself, saying the same thing he's said every night for the past 20 years. He turns out the light, cuddles up to Dwight and goes to sleep.
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May 20, 2021 15:55
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Jim tells Dwight that his uncle who works at Nintendo gave him an advanced copy of the next Zelda game, but Jim promised NOT to let ANYONE ELSE see it or play it. But it’s actually really awesome. Dwight is insanely jealous.
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May 20, 2021 15:55
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jim balances a tin bucket of water above the doorframe to dwight's office. when dwight opens the door, it falls on his head, drenching him! as the bucket of water is very heavy it also knocks him out cold, giving him a concussion
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May 20, 2021 15:57
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Dwight doesn't have an office, he works at a desk cluster in an open office plan. This is the first prank that erally just broke the suspension of disbelief for me
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May 20, 2021 16:16
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Jim nails Dwight’s feet to the floor so that when Dwight tries to get up to use the copier he discovers he can’t.
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May 20, 2021 16:32
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poisonpill posted:Dwight doesn't have an office, he works at a desk cluster in an open office plan. This is the first prank that erally just broke the suspension of disbelief for me i don't know who dwight or jim are
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May 20, 2021 17:10
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Inexplicable Humblebrag posted:i don't know who dwight or jim are the final, ultimate, prank
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May 20, 2021 17:20
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Jim announces that he's now a "Podcast Guy" and starts listening to podcasts at work. This is fine, until he starts listen to several alt-right podcasts at full volume without headphones. Frustrated by the lack of a corporate response to this, Dwight transfers to another branch. Jim smiles at the camera while the squeaky tones of Ben Shapiro drone on about dry vaginas.
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May 20, 2021 17:23
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Inexplicable Humblebrag posted:i don't know who dwight or jim are Two dogs
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May 20, 2021 17:44
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Who What Now posted:Two dogs Jim keeps barking at a tree, arguing that there might be a squirrel in there. Dwight goes to prove there's no animals there (it's a bonsai tree), at which point Jim eats all of his food. Jim mugs doggishly for the camera.
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May 20, 2021 17:47
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Jim shits on the floor in such a way that their owner Mose blames Dwight and calls him a very bad boy.
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May 20, 2021 17:57
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A Fancy Hat posted:Jim keeps barking at a tree, arguing that there might be a squirrel in there. Dwight goes to prove there's no animals there (it's a bonsai tree), at which point Jim eats all of his food. Jim mugs doggishly for the camera. Jim goes on to puke all over Dwight’s bed.
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May 20, 2021 18:20
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Jim asserts dominance over Dwight at the park
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May 20, 2021 18:43
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Jim accosts Dwight and his parents in an alley as they leave the opera and shoots both parents, forcing Dwight to become the superhero Beetman The rest of the Office makes fun of Dwight because Beetman sucks and is stupid
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May 20, 2021 19:43
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Jim joins a cult and starts ingesting massive quantities of colloidal silver, as per their instructions. His skin starts turning blue and Dwight begs him to stop. Jim starts passing out at work and slurring his words, and Dwight finally takes him to a hospital. As they're driving, Jim grabs the wheel and crashes them into a tree. Jim is ejected through the front windshield since he refused to wear a seatbelt. Dwight leaves the mangled wreck of his car to find Jim barely alive in a crumpled heap. He asks Jim if he has any last words, and Jim simply replies: "Jeez Dwight, you really BLUE it." Then smiles at nothing before passing away.
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May 20, 2021 20:48
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PinheadSlim posted:I posted "Jim puts Dwights stapler in his rear end" and I would be utterly shocked if I wasn't the 6th or 7th person to do so jim puts dwight's stapler in his rear end, for the 8th time
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May 20, 2021 20:55
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jim puts dwight's stapler in his rear end, for the 9th time
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May 20, 2021 20:56
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Jim puts his own rear end in Dwight's rear end while holding Michael's stapler, which is currently stuck in Kevin's rear end. Meredith has to be taken to the hospital
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May 20, 2021 20:58
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Jim puts Dwight's rear end in a stapler
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May 20, 2021 21:10
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| # ? Jun 3, 2024 21:47 |
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As Dwight Shrute awoke one morning from uneasy dreams he found himself transformed in his bed into a monstrous jello.
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May 20, 2021 21:15
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