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JustJeff88 posted:You've all done a fantastic job of convincing me to not click that link. Let's just say that the title is literal and refers to their actual life, not the life of their character.
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Jul 1, 2021 05:31
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RPG.net's Brazilian death squad game and our Warhammer tourney shooting have finally been topped. Jesus H. Christ.
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Jul 1, 2021 06:09
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I don't remember the death squad. Anyone got that story handy? E: Nevermind, found it. MelvinBison fucked around with this message at 13:41 on Jul 1, 2021 |
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Jul 1, 2021 13:38
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Preechr posted:Oh, how bad could this-- I've played with that guy before and I'm not especially inclined to believe the story, mostly because he has a number of other insane life stories in that vein. But I suppose it's possible that he's just had a particularly crazy life.
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Jul 1, 2021 14:05
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Colonel Cool posted:I've played with that guy before and I'm not especially inclined to believe the story, mostly because he has a number of other insane life stories in that vein. But I suppose it's possible that he's just had a particularly crazy life. Ah, the 50-foot ant rule.
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Jul 1, 2021 14:50
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senrath posted:Let's just say that the title is literal and refers to their actual life, not the life of their character. I know. That's the first thing that convinced me not to click.
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Jul 1, 2021 15:34
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According to my DM, killing my PC's mother is NOT the worst thing he could do. That would be turning her into a MILF for the party's Bard.
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Jul 2, 2021 00:23
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CobiWann posted:According to my DM, killing my PC's mother is NOT the worst thing he could do. That would be turning her into a MILF for the party's Bard. So, when you manage to sneak a peek at the evil wizard’s spell list and see that he has “PolyMILF Other” memorized, that’s when you know you’ve made him take out all the stops.
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Jul 2, 2021 01:48
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CobiWann posted:According to my DM, killing my PC's mother is NOT the worst thing he could do. That would be turning her into a MILF for the party's Bard. You're mum loves you; don't turn her into a Manticore.
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Jul 2, 2021 02:02
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Preechr posted:So, when you manage to sneak a peek at the evil wizard’s spell list and see that he has “PolyMILF Other” memorized, that’s when you know you’ve made him take out all the stops. Holy poo poo. That's one of the the best joke spell names ever. Edit - another player - "well, would the Bard make a good stepparent?" CobiWann fucked around with this message at 03:35 on Jul 2, 2021 |
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Jul 2, 2021 02:29
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"You're not even my real dad, Todd!"
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Jul 2, 2021 18:40
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At the risk of validating the bard stereotypes we are joking about, this came up recently in my 5E game. Not gratuitously, but more of a passing comment that illuminated something about characters in dungeon crawls. Our Undermountain party just had two TPK events in one week of in-game time, then we went up to Waterdeep for two days. After we did our buying/selling, the DM asked everyone what they chose to do during the unprecedented downtime. (This was just the second time we had been topside through the first five levels of the dungeon). The Paladin stuck to side quest investigations and praying to Elisstraee. The Warlock studied the arcane lore he had found in Undermountain. The Monk did some cool stuff continuing her study of Dragon Chess and sharking NPCs. I went last. "What does [the Bard] do," asked the DM. "Well, she almost died horribly, twice, in the last week. I think her priorities are rearranged like a soldier in a warzone right now. She's going to hire a courtesan or two, get a Hobbit Weed hookah, and relax," I said. "Haha. Fair enough. Looking up anything about any sidequests?" "...Nope. Just carousing. Just blowing off steam like there's no tomorrow."
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Jul 2, 2021 23:38
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Whoring aside, how has Undermountain been so far? I ask because we ran the boxed set for a bit ages go in 2e times, and the DM said that it was very taxing on his time and creative faculties because the dungeon maps were enormous but so many of the rooms were empty in the sourcebooks and it was very hard for him to make things feel full and alive.
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Jul 3, 2021 00:10
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JustJeff88 posted:Whoring aside, how has Undermountain been so far? I ask because we ran the boxed set for a bit ages go in 2e times, and the DM said that it was very taxing on his time and creative faculties because the dungeon maps were enormous but so many of the rooms were empty in the sourcebooks and it was very hard for him to make things feel full and alive. It's real, real good. I'm a big drama dork and usually prefer more narrative games over tactical dungeon crawls, but our whole group has been really enjoying this. Feel free to check my post history, since I've posted a bunch of short bits from this campaign recently. Those stories might give you a more specific picture about it. The maps are enormous, but they're well-described in the material, providing enough as a baseline but leaving room for DM flourishes. Very few rooms are nondescript, and even a ton of hallways are fairly rich. We're playing over Zoom and Roll20, and Roll20 has all the maps set up. As the party's bard IC, my OOC job (by choice) has been to be the party bookkeeper. So I'm sketching out the map and taking notes on quests n' such. The module is huge, but I haven't found it overwhelming. It just takes a while if you want to run it to completion. My group has been playing this module weekly for about 40 weeks, and we're on dungeon level 5 out of ....25, I think? It's bananas. Oh, and if you're going to start the 5E module, skip the intro adventure. It's meant to get lv1 characters to the recommended lv4 to start the dungeon, but it's kind of lame. We just started at lv4.
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Jul 3, 2021 01:05
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According to my DM, shrinkage is a side effect of lichdom.
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Jul 8, 2021 11:42
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CobiWann posted:According to my DM, shrinkage is a side effect of lichdom. Please consult a cleric if symptoms persist
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Jul 8, 2021 11:48
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Look, it’s called Abi-Dalzim’s Horrid Wilting and not Alex Jones’ Greater Vitality for a reason.
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Jul 8, 2021 12:42
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My Double Cross players are about to fight Fransisco Franco in a blasphemous ritual chamber beneath the University of Barcelona after he's been raised by an insane Inquisitor who believes Jesus was wrong not to bow to the tempter in order to gain the thrones of all nations. This after their werewolf knight went to retrieve her holy swords and custom blessed armor jacket she sealed beneath an old church before this battle, because as a Spanish heroine, killing Franco is her responsibility. Their Fairy Knight will be arriving with backup from the local court while they grapple with fallen Inquisitorial Knights and a superpowered would-be revived dictator. There is a good chance a non-binary space-wizard gets to hit Franco with a black hole, and that the werewolf gets to pull her 'Release Restriction Level 0 Let's Get Nuts' powers out again. Yes, this is partly so I can tie in with her backstory and everything, and partly so I can say I did my own version of fighting smug Hitler in Persona.
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Jul 8, 2021 13:16
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Ichabod Sexbeast posted:Please consult a cleric if symptoms persist I should post the follow-up then... According to my DM, my patron does not have a bigger dick than Asmodeus. No creature or being in all of Fifth Edition has a bigger dick than Asmodeus.
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Jul 8, 2021 14:34
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CobiWann posted:I should post the follow-up then... Cast a spell to take on the appearance and physical attributes of Asmodeus. Then cast Enlarge Person 
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Jul 8, 2021 15:00
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the_steve posted:Cast a spell to take on the appearance and physical attributes of Asmodeus. It would be hilarious if the person grows but not the dick.
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Jul 8, 2021 16:19
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Night10194 posted:Let's Get Nuts This campaign and game system sounds insane. 
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Jul 8, 2021 16:31
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CobiWann posted:I should post the follow-up then... What if you count a Purple Worm as entirely one long, angry dick? Night10194 posted:My Double Cross players are about to fight Fransisco Franco in a blasphemous ritual chamber beneath the University of Barcelona after he's been raised by an insane Inquisitor who believes Jesus was wrong not to bow to the tempter in order to gain the thrones of all nations. I also appreciate this. Had an idea for a cthulhu-esque thing during the siege of Madrid, so definitely going to steal anything and everything from your posts that isn't nailed down
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Jul 8, 2021 17:02
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Night10194 posted:My Double Cross players are about to fight Fransisco Franco in a blasphemous ritual chamber beneath the University of Barcelona after he's been raised by an insane Inquisitor who believes Jesus was wrong not to bow to the tempter in order to gain the thrones of all nations.
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Jul 8, 2021 21:14
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NGDBSS posted:Please tell me they're getting help from the Basques. I was just thinking I would link his death to Carrero Blanco's by dropping a car on him somehow.
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Jul 8, 2021 21:27
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Kavak posted:I was just thinking I would link his death to Carrero Blanco's by dropping a car on him somehow. Specifically Carrero Blanco's car It just re-entered the atmosphere, they need to guide it in
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Jul 8, 2021 21:38
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Thank you for reminding me that Double Cross exists
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Jul 8, 2021 22:07
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To The Jailbreak After making some tentative plans and discussing tactics, we leave the safety of the Keep and plunge into the maelstrom, heading towards Zeech’s ziggurat. We race across the market plaza towards Regal Street and as we approach the mouth of the street six figures robed in black materialize from out of nowhere and there is an explosion of elemental magic as we come under attack. “Lucas Mortiz!” cries a voice as our defenses absorb the initial onslaught. “You are too late! We have asked time and time again for access to Fowlsfield and the Shadow realms, but you forbade it. Now we have been granted our request but from a difference source. Now you will simply die.” A block of stone materializes in the air above the road and hurtles towards the Overlord, smashing itself to pieces on the cobblestones and flinging shrapnel in all directions. Lucas and Marja respond with spells of death of their own and Lucas shouts to us as we crouch behind an overturned cart and its plundered cargo. “Attack the ziggurat and stop Lashonna! We will deal with these ill-informed upstarts.” The Overlord looks me in the eyes. ”Whatever happens after the portal is open, remember this: too many people know about Fowlsfield for it to be a prison for much longer. When the Daughter has been recaptured, she cannot remain here.” He waves a casual hand at us and in a blink of an eye we are several hundred yards up the street and closer to the ziggurat while the sounds of detonating thaumaturgy echo behind us. Leaving the Overlord and his mistress to their own devices, we make our way up Regal Street and turn onto Prefect Street finding this road of noble estates full of thousands, tens of thousands, of Red Eyes and undead. Strangely, they are aimlessly meandering about the neighborhoods filling streets in an undead throng. Since they are not filled with hate-filled aggression, instead of battling our way through Ospar simply commands them to part and we move through the milling throng unmolested. We pass through the surreal crowd of undead and Severance speaks up, “Why ‘re this lot jus’ stand’n ‘round? Ospar? Wh’t business?” Ospar shrugs as he brandishes his holy symbol of Hextor. “Their presence in the city and their growing numbers has always been a mystery to my order, but I cannot imagine it has anything to do other than Lashonna and the Daughter of the Night.” We turn the corner onto Wine River Road and there are dozens of cultists, Deceivers no longer, standing at the base of the ziggurat, kneeling in supplication and keening a frenzied wail. Snakeeyes and Severance and Laenaya simply brandish their weapons and wade into the throng, slaughtering the cultists wholesale. But the din has attracted company in the form of a black winged horse and horseman, who announce their presence with an immense ball of fire that engulfs us. But we are no mob of street toughs, and my charms protect us from the conflagration that sets nearby buildings on fire and slaughters dozens of unprotected cultists. The pair land in front of the doors to the ziggurat and the black-armored rider pushes his visor up over his helm, revealing two glowing red points of light in a decaying face. “You fools!” the Death Knight cries, laughing maniacally. “Do you not see that the Hour of Doom is at hand? Flee now and make your peace in what time there is left!” I don’t recognize the face, but the voice is familiar. “Loris Raknian! What foulness is this?” cries Ospar. “What have you done?” We stand in a plaza before the ziggurat, corpses of slain cultists lie scattered around us with undead and Red Eyes standing at the edges. Overhead, black clouds laced with purple and green lightning spiral overhead in a vortex centered above the great obelisk on the top of the pyramid. Other than the thunderous rumbling of the storm above, and the hue and cry of the clash of arms from somewhere in the distance, the city around the ziggurat is quiet “I have made arrangements to live forever. Soon Lashonna’s ritual will be complete and the prison of the Daughter will be opened. She will come forth and reward her faithful and smite her enemies.” “O’er m’ dead body.” says Severance hefting his blade. Snakeeyes smirks a patented Snakeeyes smirk as he holds ready his bloody katana. Severance brandishes the Sword of Aaqa and the Lightning Sword and takes a step forward. Just then there is a flash of sickly light, and a massive, rumbling, windy sound like thousands of creatures exhaling simultaneously tears over us and pulls as our hair and clothes, blowing outward from the ziggurat. Then there is a moment of perfect stillness. Followed by the implosion. For an instant, there is a fine tapestry of green lightning radiating from the obelisk high up on the ziggurat that extends to every single undead creature within Thalos. Then there is a deep pulsing sound and every undead creature in Thalos is utterly drained of negative energy. Laenaya screams in pain. “Th˙s…?” she slurs and then disintegrates into a pile of dust. Loris Raknian screams in shock and disbelief as he collapses into ruin. The Red Eyes and the skeletons, the zombies, the ghouls and ghasts, the wights that surround us. All collapse into dust. Then an explosion of absolute brightness and incredible force crashes forth from the obelisk, knocking us all off our feet and collapsing nearby buildings. I immediately sense that Fowlsfield has been blown open and the shield that protects the city has been destroyed. The demons bound to the torches of the walls of Thalos are freed. Some immediately depart to their home planes while others turn inward and begin rampaging through the city. Soon fires begin across the edge of the City as the demons vent frustration at being held captive for centuries. “Oh hells,” sighs Snakeeyes. Agrikk fucked around with this message at 04:31 on Jul 11, 2021 |
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Jul 11, 2021 04:29
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I will sum up this exchange from my Thursday night Curse of Strahd game I'm running with a piece of art one of my best friends drew.
ZZT the Fifth fucked around with this message at 05:35 on Jul 11, 2021 |
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Jul 11, 2021 05:30
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Agrikk posted:To The Jailbreak If your world survives whatever in the gently caress is going on here, you've ruined the hero business. After graduating from goblins and giant rats, zombos and skellies are a crucial next step before the plot kicks in and heroes trained mercenaries. Generations of adventurers will see their careers hit a dead end at 3rd level* and they'll have to go back home, cursing your names all the while. *by traditional D&D standards, even though it seems like you're playing another game ZZT the Fifth posted:I will sum up this exchange from my hursday night Curse of Strahd game I'm running with a piece of art one of my best friends drew. At least everybody has the decency to look suitably chastised, except Jason Vorhees over there. Which one of these beautiful idiots is speaking?
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Jul 11, 2021 07:59
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Captain Walker posted:At least everybody has the decency to look suitably chastised, except Jason Vorhees over there. Which one of these beautiful idiots is speaking? I'm glad you asked! Frey, the Dragonborn Monk, is the one saying the line. From left to right, the party is: Zinfandel, a Pugilist himbo who was found tied up in a sack and stuffed in a cage, and was adopted by the party to keep him from getting himself killed. Niceda, a Bard who inspires through dance and swordplay, very recently joined the party, is often too excited to blink, and is just happy to be here. Grouse, a Forge Cleric who somewhat recently became the tallest party member and does not hesitate to remind the party of that fact. Frey, the aforementioned Monk who said the line, keeps the party's lore, and solves riddles through copious amounts of posing. Qassudusk (she named herself), the Mystic who generally has the highest concentration of brain cells in the party and the lowest concentration of being a polite sapient being.
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Jul 11, 2021 08:49
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Captain Walker posted:If your world survives whatever in the gently caress is going on here, you've ruined the hero business. After graduating from goblins and giant rats, zombos and skellies are a crucial next step before the plot kicks in and heroes trained mercenaries. Generations of adventurers will see their careers hit a dead end at 3rd level* and they'll have to go back home, cursing your names all the while. Hah! I never thought of that, but you are correct. Never fear, though, because the negative material plane is always seeping into the prime material and there must always be the town cemetery that needs to be cleansed by the wandering second level paladin. (And the game was Rolemaster second edition, but set in a home brew mishmash of Greyhawk, the Black Company, Judge’s Guild and MERP, so skeletons were closer to sixth level.)
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Jul 11, 2021 08:54
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Second post for attention: After wrapping my Traveller campaign a few weeks ago, my group has decided to switch back to fantasy so I’m going to be running a homebrew world built from scratch. One of the tenets to this new campaign is that we want this to be a high-power high-level campaign where the PCs are tousling with the servants of gods and perform world-shaping poo poo. The problem is that my players want to start at first level and eventually hit high level through their actions. So my issue is that, though our campaigns in the past have hit the D&D equivalent of high twenties level-wise, the players want to go really big, hitting the forties. Ideally we’d start at level twenty and go from there but starting that high up really dilutes the character development experience; a level twenty character grown from level one has a lot more personality than a vat-grown level twenty PC. One option is to boost the xp of encounters so the characters hit twenty faster but again, I run the risk of diluting the experience by telling the players “show up. Gain a level.” So how do I get the PCs into a high level campaign without diluting the experience?
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Jul 11, 2021 21:38
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Agrikk posted:So how do I get the PCs into a high level campaign without diluting the experience?
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Jul 11, 2021 22:21
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Agrikk posted:So how do I get the PCs into a high level campaign without diluting the experience? I really, REALLY hate to suggest this, but Cypher + Gods of the Fall may be more or less what you're looking for, and close enough to D&D's piss-farmer to literal-god to not lose them. Assuming you want a D&D-like anyway. It is extremely Monte Cook, though.
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Jul 11, 2021 22:37
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We are back to using Rolemaster (Rollmaster) second edition because it’s fast and easy, but the idea of adding more stuff along the way is pretty appealing. The only hiccup there is that, to continue with the D&D example, a fifth level mage able to cast fireball three times a day instead of one (or whatever) is more powerful sure, but it’s still not a seventeenth level mage casting method swarm. But I like the out of the box thinking and loving with the ability tree to get us there.
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Jul 11, 2021 23:14
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Agrikk posted:We are back to using Rolemaster (Rollmaster) second edition because it’s fast and easy, but the idea of adding more stuff along the way is pretty appealing. The only hiccup there is that, to continue with the D&D example, a fifth level mage able to cast fireball three times a day instead of one (or whatever) is more powerful sure, but it’s still not a seventeenth level mage casting method swarm.
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Jul 11, 2021 23:28
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Agrikk posted:Laenaya screams in pain. “Th˙s…?” she slurs and then disintegrates into a pile of dust.  Your game is such a fuckin' rollercoaster. Every post has me on the edge of my seat wondering what fresh hells our anti-heroes will go through this week.
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Jul 12, 2021 01:47
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This was a tricky one. When Markennon’s player left the game for RL responsibilities I left the door open for a return. When the player came back he decided he didn’t want to play Markennon due to the evil tone of the campaign and asked to play Laenaya. Knowing from early on that the necrotic explosion was going to be a part of the climax I had to let the player know that Laenaya was going to, er, die without revealing anything. The player was keen on playing a centuries-old vampire nightblade so he was cool knowing that his character wouldn’t be there for the final fight. So that’s how Laenaya went from a back-row NPC to a major player in the Eighth Rise of Thalos but ended up being destroyed at the eleventh hour. Ironic that if she’d stayed an NPC she probably wouldn’t have been in Thalos during the explosion and would have survived.
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Jul 12, 2021 02:44
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I'm still waiting for that giant wandering the Shadow Talos plane (don't remember exactly but I think that was it...?) somehow actually finding the city and emerging at the worst moment, just to pile in more poo poo.
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Jul 12, 2021 04:25
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