[COVID] 1 Million! We did it! :toot: :911:

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > The Goodmine > [COVID] 1 Million! We did it! :toot: :911:

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Burn Zone: May 22, 2004

platzapS posted:

Kid comes in to get tested and lists his name as just "Richardson". We find out he was hiding his first name, "Anakin".

I have a nephew under the age of 10 named Anakin lmao

and another named ed ballls

# ? Aug 21, 2021 04:03

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# ? May 25, 2024 08:24

Bastard Tetris: Apr 27, 2005; L-Shaped; Nap Ghost

poo poo POST MALONE posted:

we are going camping on Orcas in late September and it's going to own bones

if you go to Vashon and you�re asymptomatic you could probably wipe the whole island out

# ? Aug 21, 2021 04:03

Rauros: Aug 25, 2004; wanna go grub thumping?

poo poo POST MALONE posted:

we are going camping on Orcas in late September and it's going to own bones

late september and early october are the best times on the oregon and washington coasts

# ? Aug 21, 2021 04:04

Blackhawk: Nov 15, 2004

Anybody who says you can't get rid of delta has been infected with capitalist brain poison. It's a loving virus, it's got no legs. If everyone masked up and stayed inside with food and essentials delivered by frequently tested government workers that poo poo would be gone in a few weeks. The only reason 'delta' even exists at all is because of capitalism.

# ? Aug 21, 2021 04:05

Helith: Nov 5, 2009; Basket of Adorables

https://twitter.com/JoshBavas/status/1428904749705826305

the protestors are probably wearing masks either to hide their identity or because it's smoky as gently caress in Sydney today from hazard reduction burns lol

# ? Aug 21, 2021 04:06

fits my needs: Jan 1, 2011; Grimey Drawer

https://twitter.com/FOX13News/status/1428916023550435329?s=20

# ? Aug 21, 2021 04:07

WampaLord: Jan 14, 2010

Blackhawk posted:

Anybody who says you can't get rid of delta has been infected with capitalist brain poison. It's a loving virus, it's got no legs. If everyone masked up and stayed inside with food and essentials delivered by frequently tested government workers that poo poo would be gone in a few weeks. The only reason 'delta' even exists at all is because of capitalism.

not surprising that "we are all gonna get it" has become the refrain of the dumbest blue maga types

# ? Aug 21, 2021 04:09

Burn Zone: May 22, 2004

FizFashizzle posted:

People like to fantasize about what the collapse of the US will look like and imagine it being some huge, cataclysmic event.

But it won�t be. It�ll be a flood of small, unforeseen, isolated failures like this. They�ll force population shift that will put strain on the system and create even more small, unforeseen, isolated collapses.

The places that survive will be the ones with enough existing institutional stability to weather and stabilize it. But as the displaced move and crowd into cities, the same impulses that led them to destroy their old homes will infect their new ones.

Florida is not a place; it is a mindset. And it will move north.

# ? Aug 21, 2021 04:16

VomitOnLino: Jun 13, 2005; Sometimes I get lost.

America, a political timeline:

2019: Horse Whisperer
2021: Horse Dewormer

# ? Aug 21, 2021 04:19

Google Butt: Oct 4, 2005; Xenology is an unnatural mixture of science fiction and formal logic. At its core is a flawed assumption...

that an alien race would be psychologically human.

one day ur gonna wake up and the pandemic will be over, rest easy, Floridians

# ? Aug 21, 2021 04:19

The Oldest Man: Jul 28, 2003

fits my needs posted:

https://twitter.com/FOX13News/status/1428916023550435329?s=20

"ITS ENDEMIC@!!!!@@"

"endemic" is an observational description for a disease with an Re that averages to 1

This isn't that and frankly anyone saying it is is spreading misinformation that will (and already has) gotten people killed

People really, really want to conflate "it's not going away" with "it's fine" like if you just keep saying "he's just like that" about your pitbull that kills kids, that makes it ok

# ? Aug 21, 2021 04:19

Salt Fish: Sep 11, 2003; Cybernetic Crumb

I bought a Only Your Respirator Trust shirt to go with my trump kickstarter book that will never exist and my circa 2007 Something Awful branded playing cards lol

# ? Aug 21, 2021 04:20

Apraxin: Feb 22, 2006; General-Admiral

https://twitter.com/MartySilkHack/status/1428916512081940484

# ? Aug 21, 2021 04:20

Taitale: Feb 19, 2011

https://twitter.com/hyperplanes/status/1428864144128741383

# ? Aug 21, 2021 04:22

Apraxin: Feb 22, 2006; General-Admiral

https://twitter.com/suzandelibasic/status/1428905486221385733
https://twitter.com/rachael_dexter/status/1428910868691968005
:shepface:

# ? Aug 21, 2021 04:23

Nocturtle: Mar 17, 2007

Aging well:

quote:

The New Yorker
The Beginning of the End of the American Pandemic
The country is reopening. What does the future hold?
Dhruv Khullar

May 25, 2021

...

It’s possible, given all this, to imagine a plausible scenario for the conclusion of the American pandemic. The coronavirus disease toll continues to fall throughout the summer. States do away with mask mandates and capacity restrictions; people increasingly return to bars, spin classes, and airports, then to stadiums, movie theatres, and concerts. By midsummer, in communities with high vaccination rates, covid-19 starts to fade from view. In those places, even people who remain unvaccinated are protected, because so little of the virus circulates. But, in other parts of the country, low immunization rates combined with reopening allow the disease to register again. Hospitals aren’t overwhelmed—there’s no need to build new I.C.U.s or call in extra staff—but the collision between ship and iceberg is forceful, and each week thousands of people fall ill and hundreds die. Some victims are vaccine-hesitant; others were unable, for whatever reason, to get vaccinated. Still, perhaps unfairly, these outbreaks come with an aura of culpability: to people in safe parts of the country, the ill seem like smokers who get lung cancer.

In the fall, many unvaccinated children return to school. Scattered infections among them capture headlines, but serious illnesses are exceedingly rare; the overwhelming majority of children remain safe, and, with time, they, too, are immunized. The U.S. approaches something like herd immunity. Some people may still fall ill and die of covid-19—perhaps they are immunocompromised, elderly, or just unlucky—but, by and large, America has gained the upper hand. Meanwhile, in poor nations with few vaccines, the pandemic continues. As crisis wanes in one country, catastrophe ignites in another. Every so often, we learn of a new variant that’s thought to be more contagious, lethal, or vaccine-resistant than the rest; we rush to institute travel bans, only to learn that the variant, or a close cousin, is already circulating in the U.S. and has been largely subdued by the vaccines, as all previous variants have been. In the fall, Americans line up for covid booster shots alongside flu vaccines. The pandemic’s final chapter comes to a close not through official decree but with the gradual realization that covid-19 no longer dominates our lives.
....

A time capsule of the kind of thinking prevalent in liberal circles as the country ran off the cliff Wile E Coyote style.

# ? Aug 21, 2021 04:25

Google Butt: Oct 4, 2005; Xenology is an unnatural mixture of science fiction and formal logic. At its core is a flawed assumption...

that an alien race would be psychologically human.

lol Australia thirsts for death and I can respect that

# ? Aug 21, 2021 04:25

WampaLord: Jan 14, 2010

Google Butt posted:

lol Australia thirsts for death and I can respect that

, mate!

# ? Aug 21, 2021 04:26

Zmej: Nov 6, 2005

poisonpill posted:

covids back, baby, and it�s bad again! Awoooughuch (wolf cough)

# ? Aug 21, 2021 04:27

In Training: Jun 28, 2008

may owned. remember when the cdc lied about the vaccines giving sterilizing immunity bc they thought it would boost adoption rates. good poo poo.

# ? Aug 21, 2021 04:28

space chandeliers: Apr 8, 2008

Western society's conception of disease never truly ascended over the four humors and miasma theory, it fuckin rules.

# ? Aug 21, 2021 04:30

In Training: Jun 28, 2008

# ? Aug 21, 2021 04:30

Otter_Sauce: Mar 2, 2019; ~Yikes~

Sudden Loud Noise posted:

Diet Coke will save us all.

My man 👍

# ? Aug 21, 2021 04:31

The Oldest Man: Jul 28, 2003

Nocturtle posted:

A time capsule of the kind of thinking prevalent in liberal circles as the country ran off the cliff Wile E Coyote style.

Literally wrote those words as India ran out of firewood to burn their dead

Just a cavalcade of the stupidest failson motherfuckers alive getting paid to tell us what to think

# ? Aug 21, 2021 04:32

Stereotype: Apr 24, 2010; College Slice

space chandeliers posted:

Western society's conception of disease never truly ascended over the four humors and miasma theory, it fuckin rules.

honestly covid spreads super close to how miasma is described and if people thought about it as an inescapable cloud wafting from infected people we'd probably have rules that make more sense. right now the rules address some weird mixture between a disease that spreads like food poisoning and one that spreads exclusively by macroscopic saliva molecules that travel in perfectly straight lines.

# ? Aug 21, 2021 04:34

Stereotype: Apr 24, 2010; College Slice

when i was on a plane recently the ground power on the plane was hosed up, so the A/C was off while everyone was boarding up until we got pushed back and the engines turned on. The in-flight entertainment kept bombarding me with this propaganda that the ARMY had tested planes to see if covid would spread in the tightly packed enclosed metal tube and it wouldn't ever, it was completely 100% impossible, because of the high power air filtration system. I kept thinking about that half hour where we all sat on the plane and the air filtration wasn't on, and we were just breathing in each other's farts and covid miasma. I bet they didn't test that edge case.

# ? Aug 21, 2021 04:37

The Oldest Man: Jul 28, 2003

Stereotype posted:

honestly covid spreads super close to how miasma is described and if people thought about it as an inescapable cloud wafting from infected people we'd probably have rules that make more sense. right now the rules address some weird mixture between a disease that spreads like food poisoning and one that spreads exclusively by macroscopic saliva molecules that travel in perfectly straight lines.

I was literally shouted out of the bad forum last year, April or May by multiple people who used the "sounds like someone didn't learn miasma isn't real :smug:

" move because I saying all the goofy rear end just-so explanations for how surface contamination was supposed to explain unlikely chains of transmission like "only touching the same button in an elevator could explain this" or "the passengers in the front and back row must have touched the same handrail on that bus!" were much more easily explained by persistent aerosols and that everyone should be wearing n95s.

# ? Aug 21, 2021 04:39

mod sassinator: Dec 13, 2006; I came here to Kick Ass and Chew Bubblegum,
and I'm All out of Ass

SKULL.GIF posted:

Why are these updates always larger than the number of new cases reported by Worldometers?

worldo goes back to put the cases on the day they occured, so stuff reported today but that actually occured last week now bumps up last week's number. whereas BNO just reports the raw new number of cases regardless of when they occured. so if florida dumps a weekend BNO sees it all as +38k on that day whereas worldo will split it up onto the appropriate day. each one is a kinda different but still interesting view of what's going on

# ? Aug 21, 2021 04:41

The Oldest Man: Jul 28, 2003

Stereotype posted:

when i was on a plane recently the ground power on the plane was hosed up, so the A/C was off while everyone was boarding up until we got pushed back and the engines turned on. The in-flight entertainment kept bombarding me with this propaganda that the ARMY had tested planes to see if covid would spread in the tightly packed enclosed metal tube and it wouldn't ever, it was completely 100% impossible, because of the high power air filtration system. I kept thinking about that half hour where we all sat on the plane and the air filtration wasn't on, and we were just breathing in each other's farts and covid miasma. I bet they didn't test that edge case.

yeah the authors of that study actually had a couple of things to say about the way it's been used by the airline industry

quote:

After seeing some initial reactions to the study, the authors of this study are concerned about the
potential misinterpretation of the findings, based on some hypothetical calculations originally included
as discussion points. In particular, the viral aerosol production rates, infectious dose and general
assumptions used to estimate a flight time of 54 hours to produce an infection are hypothetical and
were not designed to provide actionable information about viral risk during flight, safe flight times or
seating capacity.
As described in the report, the assumption of 4000 virions/hour is based exhaled breath studies of other
human coronaviruses [1], and idealized estimates derived from studies of SARS-CoV-2 aerosol in patient
rooms [2,3]. While the number is reasonable given the context of Leung et al., it is not meant to be
representative of the range of possible source terms. For instance, Jianxin et al.[4] report estimates of
1.03 � 105
to 2.25 � 107 virus/hour produced by infected individuals in exhaled breath. In more closely
examining the range, however, it is clear these estimates were derived from 14 of the 52 individuals
studied, and that the other individuals had no detectable virus in their exhaled breath. It is also critical
to note that all of the estimates of virus in exhaled breath are based on viral RNA copy numbers derived
from rRT-PCR, not infectious virus. While on the face of it, it may appear reasonable to estimate
concentrations of infectious virus using RNA copy data, the relationship is likely more complex. For
instance, La Scola et al. [5] were unable to isolate infectious virus from nasal pharyngeal samples with a
Ct greater than 34 for the E gene of SARS-CoV-2. . Fabian et al. [6] found that laboratory stocks of
influenza virus had a RNA copy to infectious virus ratio of 300, when comparing RT-PCR results to tissue
culture. SARS-CoV-2 grown in Vero E6 cells also shows many RNA copies per pfu (Santarpia unpublished
data). Therefore, determining infection risk from viral RNA copies is not currently possible.
The infectious dose of SARS-CoV-2 in humans is also unknown. There are a number of studies that
attempt to estimate it (e.g. . Basu, 2020; Schr�der, 2020, Watanabe, et al. 2010), and several studies of
infections in animals (e.g. Ryan, et al. 2020), but no current study determines an infectious dose in any
species, much less humans
Finally, the data in this study is relevant only to a single mode of transmission: aerosol. Contact
transmission and droplet transmission are not considered. Furthermore, the impact of human behavior
on aerosol transport in the airframe was not considered. Movement of people up and down the aisles,
or even simply the act of turning your head to talk to your neighbor could not be considered. Human
actions have been shown to significantly contribute to aerosol movement in the built environment (e.g.
Wang and Chow [7]), and therefore the results of this study represent a baseline understanding of how
the aircraft air-handling systems impact the transport of aerosols throughout the aircraft.
Taken in context, the data from this study indicate that the airplane environment significantly reduces
the exposure to aerosol generated by passengers, especially compared to other indoor environments.
However, the current established scientific understanding of SARS-CoV-2 transmission dynamics is not
sufficient to calculate definitive SARS-CoV-2 transmission risk from these measurements of aerosol
transport.

# ? Aug 21, 2021 04:41

Judakel: Jul 29, 2004; Can't post for 9 years!

fits my needs posted:

https://twitter.com/FOX13News/status/1428916023550435329?s=20

awww the babies wanna know the future all of a sudden

# ? Aug 21, 2021 04:42

mod sassinator: Dec 13, 2006; I came here to Kick Ass and Chew Bubblegum,
and I'm All out of Ass

Apraxin posted:

https://twitter.com/MartySilkHack/status/1428916512081940484

watch some loving politicians spark a huge outbreak in perth lmao

# ? Aug 21, 2021 04:43

Stereotype: Apr 24, 2010; College Slice

mod sassinator posted:

worldo goes back to put the cases on the day they occured, so stuff reported today but that actually occured last week now bumps up last week's number. whereas BNO just reports the raw new number of cases regardless of when they occured. so if florida dumps a weekend BNO sees it all as +38k on that day whereas worldo will split it up onto the appropriate day. each one is a kinda different but still interesting view of what's going on

worldo's way of counting makes it look like the most recent days are better than they actually are by construction. no one goes back and looks at how the graph is changing in the past as days progress, if you can even do it at all. it's a bad way of presenting data unless you always exclude the most recent week or so.

it's the same thing as those states that always have some dotted line that extends past a solid one and it is always going down. it makes it look like things are getting better when they are probably getting worse.

# ? Aug 21, 2021 04:43

Atrocious Joe: Sep 2, 2011

mod sassinator posted:

https://twitter.com/BNODesk/status/1428867615422812166

choo choo full steam ahead to 200k cases per day next week

we're going to celebrate the twentieth anniversary of 9/11 by having a 9/11 amount of COVID deaths

# ? Aug 21, 2021 04:43

Stereotype: Apr 24, 2010; College Slice

Judakel posted:

awww the babies wanna know the future all of a sudden

well they can always ask us. i don't think they'll like what we know is going to happen though.

# ? Aug 21, 2021 04:44

Harry Potter on Ice: Nov 4, 2006; IF IM NOT BITCHING ABOUT HOW SHITTY MY LIFE IS, REPORT ME FOR MY ACCOUNT HAS BEEN HIJACKED

poo poo POST MALONE posted:

we are going camping on Orcas in late September and it's going to own bones

You should go to doe bay and get naked in the hot tubs with a respirator on. Super relaxing

# ? Aug 21, 2021 04:44

mod sassinator: Dec 13, 2006; I came here to Kick Ass and Chew Bubblegum,
and I'm All out of Ass

Atrocious Joe posted:

we're going to celebrate the twentieth anniversary of 9/11 by having a 9/11 amount of COVID deaths

god bless *cough* *cough* america

# ? Aug 21, 2021 04:45

Thesaurus: Oct 3, 2004

navyjack posted:

Maaaaan, CO has a state vaccine registry so you can look up your vaccinations, so if I want to try and get some Max Titers, I�m gonna have to go the no-ID route. I�ll wear one of my 20 year old concert tees, my painting pants, smoke a bowl before I go in and tell them I forgot my ID and my parole officer told me I had to get the slut juice. Now I just need a name. I�m thinking Morris �Mo� Schotts.

what did you find out about the registry? Do they check before giving out shots?

# ? Aug 21, 2021 04:46