[COVID] 1 Million! We did it! :toot: :911:

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > The Goodmine > [COVID] 1 Million! We did it! :toot: :911:

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fits my needs: Jan 1, 2011; Grimey Drawer

jisforjosh posted:

It's ok, they'll count towards the Hurricane Ida death toll, not COVID

died of hurricane WITH covid

# ? Aug 27, 2021 23:43

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# ? May 24, 2024 23:11

Epic High Five: Jun 5, 2004

RadDickOwl posted:

Yeah that is pretty much everything I was typing, but I gave it 40 years.
we're just crack pinged losers with nothing better to do than theorize about redacted lab safety reports. i don't believe me and EHF are about to start a war here either
And being right all the time is loving exhausting but at least you get a rush out of it and get to feel smug for a hot minute, telling your few remaining friends and family SEE?? I TOLD YOU!!! while they are visibly uncomfortable and wondering if it's prodromal schizophrenia.

Yeah, I am just curious if there's data about flu like illness that could support it, or well, just correlate.

the nursing home poo poo is what got my attention, too.

my first post in the OG COVID thread was late February saying this was gonna go down just like Spanish Flu and to read The Great Influenza as a guidebook. The next 4 months was me preaching the gospel of the lentil

# ? Aug 27, 2021 23:44

Durf: Aug 16, 2017

Lastgirl posted:

from fmn:

https://twitter.com/POTUS/status/1431383846587621380

he basically just gave you vague descriptions to comply to local guidance that have not been updated for pandemic standards obviously

America is back

Open Biden

if you get hit by the hurricane, it's your oooooown fault

# ? Aug 27, 2021 23:45

Lenin Stimpy: Sep 9, 2009; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

Epic High Five posted:

they existed with the USSR too and it didn't happen, why would they feel the need to go to war with us lmao, we're their best customers and all our lines are utterly dependent on them and we're destroying ourselves just fine on our own

What are you arguing? Genuinely cant understand what you're saying here.

# ? Aug 27, 2021 23:46

Epic High Five: Jun 5, 2004

Lenin Stimpy posted:

What are you arguing? Genuinely cant understand what you're saying here.

I'm saying your worrying about my talking about Fort Detrick causing a global nuclear war with China isn't something you need to be doing, unburden thyself and embrace the weekend feeling

# ? Aug 27, 2021 23:47

shackleford: Sep 4, 2006

https://www.redandblack.com/uganews...3534ab07cc.html

quote:

UGA professor resigns mid-class after student refuses to wear mask

A University of Georgia retiree-rehire professor resigned on Tuesday after one of his students refused to properly wear a mask in an upper division psychology seminar class held at the psychology building.

During Irwin Bernstein�s second class of the semester, the student, who was not present on the first day of class, arrived at the 25-person class unmasked and was asked by Bernstein to retrieve one from the advising office. The student was given a spare disposable mask from a peer but did not wear it over her nose.

Bernstein asked the student to pull her mask up to wear it correctly, but she said she �couldn�t breathe� and �had a really hard time breathing� with the cloth over her mouth and nose.

Written on the board at the front of the classroom was, �No mask, no class,� according to fourth-year psychology major Hannah Huff.

The 88-year-old psychology professor explained to the student that he could die from COVID-19 due to underlying health conditions such as Type 2 diabetes, hypertension and age-related problems, Bernstein said in an email to The Red & Black.

Only about 15 minutes into the Tuesday lecture, which consisted of Bernstein taking the student attendance, he asked the student to pull her mask up again, but this time, the student did not respond.

Bernstein, who was already informed that two of his absent students tested positive for COVID-19, then announced his resignation on the spot and left the class immediately.

NO MASK NO CLASS

# ? Aug 27, 2021 23:47

Stereotype: Apr 24, 2010; College Slice

Epic High Five posted:

they existed with the USSR too and it didn't happen, why would they feel the need to go to war with us lmao, we're their best customers and all our lines are utterly dependent on them and we're destroying ourselves just fine on our own

China isn�t going to nuke the US, the US is going to nuke China because they will be the clear dominant superpower in 5 years and the US is full of and run by a bunch of petty violent psychopaths.

# ? Aug 27, 2021 23:47

meet girls at the store: Nov 4, 2002

My Costco is now limiting purchases of bottled water, toilet paper, and disinfecting wipes, only two per person. And I�m in California, so nowhere near the hurricane.

# ? Aug 27, 2021 23:48

Mustached Demon: Nov 12, 2016

just throw horse paste and bleach at the hurricane

# ? Aug 27, 2021 23:48

upsidedown: Dec 30, 2008

Stereotype posted:

lol those people who are eating horse paste are crazy. anyway i've gotten 9 vaccine shots and so should you

lmao

https://twitter.com/gregmlarsen/status/1430856822311710729

# ? Aug 27, 2021 23:48

Epic High Five: Jun 5, 2004

Stereotype posted:

China isn�t going to nuke the US, the US is going to nuke China because they will be the clear dominant superpower in 5 years and the US is full of and run by a bunch of petty violent psychopaths.

well it still wouldn't be because I said Fort Detrick is where COVID-19 originated

# ? Aug 27, 2021 23:48

Thoguh: Nov 8, 2002; College Slice

Epic High Five posted:

they existed with the USSR too and it didn't happen, why would they feel the need to go to war with us lmao, we're their best customers and all our lines are utterly dependent on them and we're destroying ourselves just fine on our own

I'm pretty sure we have war plans against literally every country in the world. Like, we probably have a plan, a lovely one but a plan, to invade Portugal if we decided that was a thing we wanted to do.

# ? Aug 27, 2021 23:50

ascii genitals: Aug 19, 2000

Demon Of The Fall posted:

# ? Aug 27, 2021 23:50

Burn Zone: May 22, 2004

Substandard posted:

My understanding is that the easiest thing to do is just give your real name and say it's your first shot, but I have no idea if your insurance will eventually come after you with a bill or something.

I did this and it's been almost a month and nothing from them yet

# ? Aug 27, 2021 23:52

RadDickOwl: Aug 18, 2013

US is a failing empire, they likely will bomb the poo poo out of more places as the decline continues.

And we must always remember, Epic High Five made it happen.

# ? Aug 27, 2021 23:52

Bruce Hussein Daddy: Dec 26, 2005; I testify that there is none worthy of worship except God and I testify that Muhammad is the Messenger of God

Teenage Riot posted:

Thank u for bringing it back

# ? Aug 27, 2021 23:52

Epic High Five: Jun 5, 2004

RadDickOwl posted:

US is a failing empire, they likely will bomb the poo poo out of more places as the decline continues.

And we must always remember, Epic High Five made it happen.

Working hard, thank you!

# ? Aug 27, 2021 23:53

Rubby: Aug 31, 2002; <3 Louby

Mayor Dave posted:

Holy poo poo lmao

https://twitter.com/NateSilver538/status/1431357604350074884?s=19

uh... https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?noseen=1&threadid=3976692&pagenumber=413&perpage=40#post517265263

soooooooo..... I'm not saying that Nate Silver is bird dude but I'm totally not not saying that either. SHOW YOURSELF, COWARDLY NATE SILVER. I CHALLENGE YOU TO A DUEL FOR THE HIGH CRIME OF STOLEN VALOR

# ? Aug 27, 2021 23:55

Koirhor: Jan 14, 2008; by Fluffdaddy

I encourage you all to get a hurricane vaccine before landfall

# ? Aug 27, 2021 23:55

Schnorkles: Apr 30, 2015; It's a little bit juvenile, but it's simple and it's timeless.

We let it be known that Schnorkles, for a snack, eats tiny pieces of shit.

You're picturing it and you're talking about it. That's a win in my book.

https://twitter.com/jwilliamsNOLA/status/1431385987209469956

hmmmm

# ? Aug 27, 2021 23:55

Schnorkles: Apr 30, 2015; It's a little bit juvenile, but it's simple and it's timeless.

We let it be known that Schnorkles, for a snack, eats tiny pieces of shit.

You're picturing it and you're talking about it. That's a win in my book.

Bruce Hussein Daddy posted:

The Lord replied, "Lol. Lmao."

# ? Aug 27, 2021 23:56

Koirhor: Jan 14, 2008; by Fluffdaddy

Schnorkles posted:

https://twitter.com/jwilliamsNOLA/status/1431385987209469956

hmmmm

lmao

# ? Aug 27, 2021 23:56

Casey Finnigan: Apr 30, 2009; Dumb ✔
So goddamn crazy ✔

Schnorkles posted:

https://twitter.com/jwilliamsNOLA/status/1431385987209469956

hmmmm

what the gently caress

# ? Aug 27, 2021 23:56

Zisky: May 6, 2003; PM me and I will show you my tits

Did they try shooting the hurricane?

# ? Aug 27, 2021 23:57

Casey Finnigan: Apr 30, 2009; Dumb ✔
So goddamn crazy ✔

if it's too late to evacuate everyone why is the plan to just give up instead of evacuating as many as possible lmao what in the gently caress

# ? Aug 27, 2021 23:58

703: May 11, 2007; Contains Carbon Monoxide

Schnorkles posted:

https://twitter.com/jwilliamsNOLA/status/1431385987209469956

hmmmm

Number go up

# ? Aug 27, 2021 23:58

Xaris: Jul 25, 2006; Lucky there's a family guy
Lucky there's a man who positively can do
All the things that make us
Laugh and cry

Casey Finnigan posted:

if it's too late to evacuate everyone why is the plan to just give up instead of evacuating as many as possible lmao what in the gently caress

# ? Aug 27, 2021 23:58

skewetoo: Mar 30, 2003

Beginning to think we have a bunch of quitters and losers in positions of authority

# ? Aug 27, 2021 23:59

fits my needs: Jan 1, 2011; Grimey Drawer

Casey Finnigan posted:

if it's too late to evacuate everyone why is the plan to just give up instead of evacuating as many as possible lmao what in the gently caress

that is unfair to those who would be not evacuated, so it is better to not evacuate anyone

# ? Aug 27, 2021 23:59

Schnorkles: Apr 30, 2015; It's a little bit juvenile, but it's simple and it's timeless.

We let it be known that Schnorkles, for a snack, eats tiny pieces of shit.

You're picturing it and you're talking about it. That's a win in my book.

https://twitter.com/TheLeadCNN/status/1431389195625541634

spoiler it apparently has nothing to do with the fact that we have a death virus ravaging the country

# ? Aug 28, 2021 00:01

Steve Yun: Aug 7, 2003; I'm a parasitic landlord that needs to get a job instead of stealing worker's money. Make sure to remind me when I post.; Soiled Meat

in order to get more teens vaccinated, get a free comic with your shots:

sounds kinda dorky

# ? Aug 28, 2021 00:01

Koirhor: Jan 14, 2008; by Fluffdaddy

Casey Finnigan posted:

if it's too late to evacuate everyone why is the plan to just give up instead of evacuating as many as possible lmao what in the gently caress

covidcane!!!!!

# ? Aug 28, 2021 00:01

Wrex Ruckus: Aug 24, 2015

HiHo ChiRho posted:

For me the theory goes from slightly possible to "they probably did it" is the fact that around the time the lab shut down in summer 2019, a bunch of nursing homes around FD started having mystery respiratory outbreaks, very unusual for the season. It even got pickedup by major news networks:

https://abcnews.go.com/US/respiratory-outbreak-investigated-retirement-community-54-residents-fall/story?id=64275865

I would think if there was an outbreak connected to FD you would also see it happening in nursing homes in Frederick MD, not 50 miles away in northern VA

# ? Aug 28, 2021 00:02

Buck Wildman: Mar 30, 2010; I am Metango, Galactic Governor

Steve Yun posted:

in order to get more teens vaccinated, get a free comic with your shots:

sounds kinda dorky

lmfao this is the most patronizing poo poo

# ? Aug 28, 2021 00:02

Burn Zone: May 22, 2004

Steve Yun posted:

they�re buying ivermectin from Ali express now

I bought covid antibody tests via DHgate in April 2020 lmao

# ? Aug 28, 2021 00:03

Buck Wildman: Mar 30, 2010; I am Metango, Galactic Governor

at least a lollipop with my shot would taste good

# ? Aug 28, 2021 00:03

McNugget Buddy: Aug 14, 2021; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

Schnorkles posted:

https://twitter.com/jwilliamsNOLA/status/1431385987209469956

hmmmm

What the gently caress

# ? Aug 28, 2021 00:03

Covok: May 27, 2013; Yet where is that woman now? Tell me, in what heave does she reside? None of them. Because no God bothered to listen or care. If that is what you think it means to be a God, then you and all your teachings are welcome to do as that poor women did. And vanish from these realms forever.

https://www.oregonlive.com/business/2021/08/oregon-says-people-fired-for-refusing-vaccines-generally-cant-collect-jobless-benefits.html

Normally, I'd be against this as a matter of labor rights but not getting UI because you wanted to kill old people, kids, and immune compromised people does feel fitting.

# ? Aug 28, 2021 00:04

ricecult: Oct 2, 2012

I don't see how anyone could doubt at this point that government, on various levels, is trying to kill as many people through willful negligence as they can get away with. This is because the government and our entire economy is a house of hards, and in the face of climate change, it knows it can't actually handle a large population, only a small one that either doesn't question it, or is frightened into submission.

# ? Aug 28, 2021 00:04

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# ? May 24, 2024 23:11

Twigand Berries: Sep 7, 2008

Did you know masking children was child abuse? I literally just found out. It was on a sign a man with a pube beard held on a street corner alone.

# ? Aug 28, 2021 00:05

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > The Goodmine > [COVID] 1 Million! We did it! :toot: :911:

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